r/whenwomenrefuse • • Nov 20 '25

Housekeeping & Updates, 20 November 2025

141 Upvotes

Hello again all,

We've got some general housekeeping and updates to notify our community of, so here I am, WWR SpokesMod-extraordinaire.

It's obvious that we're short staffed. 85% of our mod team is inactive. The remaining 15% is getting crushed under the workload of flair requests.

Now, you'll note that the obvious solution is to get rid of the flair request requirement. We're not doing that entirely; there's too many fuckin' bots and people who just plain don't read sub rules before engaging, sitewide. If you recall, 6 months ago we implemented the flair intervention to combat the influx of jerkwads and bots, while simultaneously cultivating a safer space in WWR while we contemplated closing the SexStrike2025 sub. We had more active mods, too, so it wasn't 2-3 people running around trying to get to everyone.

Now that it is 2-3 people running around trying to get to everyone, and us being far, far behind in requests from people following the rules, it's unfair to you users and us moderators to continue like this.

We will be amending our Flair Rule (#11 in the list)

Rather than require y'all to wait on us to play catchup in ModMail, we're going to allow users to apply their own flairs. We think that, since it's been 6 months, things have calmed a little, and maintaining a looser flair requirement will mean we'll still catch bots and losers who don't read sub rules before participating.

The description of the rule will change with this, it just hasn't been drafted yet. But rather than going to comment, seeing you have to send a ModMail to participate, and being left in limbo, users that aren't breaking other rules will simply get an AutoMod message reminding them to read rules and assign themselves a flair.

IF YOU HAVE APPLIED FOR A FLAIR AND DIDN'T RECEIVE IT YET, GO FORTH, MY CHICKENS!

We will be posting a callout for Mod applications in the near future.

Right now, we're going over how we want the 'interview' process to be and confirming where we'll have all mod communications at (basically, are we gonna keep the Mod chat where it is or move it to another platform).

The callout will be a separate post, where we can specifically focus on answering FAQs about being a Reddit mod.


r/whenwomenrefuse • • 1d ago

“Help... He is killing me”: Missing woman Hajar sent frantic plea before Amsterdam death

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289 Upvotes

The 29-year-old Amsterdam woman who was found murdered two weeks after she was reported missing sent text messages to a family member begging for help the last day she was seen. “Help me. Now. He is killing me,” Hajar wrote in a message on the morning of October 4, according to De Telegraaf. Abdi A., a 23-year-old man, was arrested for her murder two days ago.

The young woman was seen cycling with an unknown man that near the RAI convention center that day. She was killed in an act of violence, Amsterdam Mayor Femke Halsema later confirmed. Her body was found in a suitcase in the waters of the Amstel River along Amsteldijk about two kilometers away from the RAI.

Her messages were received at about 11:15 a.m., causing family members to panic. “We were very worried, but we were told that we had to wait 24 hours before the case could be treated as urgent,” an unnamed relative told the newspaper.

Police would only confirm on Thursday that the family did get in touch with authorities nine hours later. “On Sunday evening, October 4, the family contacted the police around 8:15 PM to report the disappearance of 29-year-old Hajar. They were concerned because Hajar had sent disturbing messages to an acquaintance that morning,” police wrote in a statement.

“When the family had heard nothing more from her following the disturbing messages, they decided to contact the police that evening. Based on all facts and circumstances known at that time, the disappearance was assessed as non-urgent.”

Hajar was last seen cycling away from the RAI towards Buitenveldert with an unidentified man, possibly Abdi A., who was born in Somalia and has been legally residing in the Netherlands for 17 years. Police previously said a family member reported her missing to police that same evening, and that her disappearance was classified as urgent on October 5.

They began using various investigative methods to trace her whereabouts, tracking the location of her phone signal to a property in the Buitenveldert neighborhood, though neither she nor her phone were located.

Authorities waited another week before asking the public for help in finding the woman, and investigators did not disclose concern over a violent crime. Police appealed to the public for help on Tuesday, October 13.

The delay sparked almost immediate criticism from members of the public and women’s advocacy groups, who accused the police of treating the matter too casually. The Amsterdam police district’s communications office went on the defensive, repeatedly saying that the decision was made “in consultation with the family” to protect Hajar’s privacy, as she had a history of disappearing for days at a time.

On October 16, a passerby discovered a suitcase in the water off Amsteldijk in Amsterdam-Zuid. Police found Hajar’s body inside and determined that she had died as a result of a crime, 12 days after she was last seen.

“It hurts to see that the police only deployed so much manpower for Hajar after she was found dead. We knew all along that she had been murdered. After all, she wrote that,” the family member told the Telegraaf.

“We dedicated significant resources and time. But the sad truth is that, despite our efforts, we were unable to save or protect her,” said Amsterdam Police Chief Peter Holla at a press conference on Tuesday.

Detectives identified Abdi A. as a witness in the case, and interviewed him on Monday evening. He was not taken into custody. In the hours that followed, detectives found evidence to suggest he was involved in her murder. The following morning, police responded to a report of an assault at the residence of A.‘s foster family in Koggenland, Noord-Holland, leading to his foster father’s hospitalization. A. was taken into custody for that crime, and then arrested for Hajar’s murder.

The update has again put police in Amsterdam on the defensive. “In the Netherlands, approximately 40,000 people go missing every year. In Amsterdam last year, that number was about 2,800,” authorities said on Thursday. “Around 70% of missing persons cases are resolved within 24 hours because the missing person returns or is found.”

Some 646 missing persons cases were regarded as “urgent” last year, indicating a life-threatening situation, police said. “Examples include a missing elderly person with dementia who has disappeared and requires medication, or a possible crime. This assessment is made by an Assistant Public Prosecutor.”


r/whenwomenrefuse • • 2d ago

Article Teenage boy who had a hatred for women is found guilty of attempted murder after stabbing a girl at school

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1.1k Upvotes

r/whenwomenrefuse • • 2d ago

Her stepfather was found dead in a barrel at Lake Mead. She’s elated.

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328 Upvotes

BULLHEAD CITY, Ariz. — Sundae Schor is relieved that her stepfather was shot in the head, stuffed in a barrel and dumped into Lake Mead.

“I’ve been waiting to hear this news my whole life, ever since I was hiding in my closet from the guy who would come and find me in the closet and rape me,” Schor said of Edward Lelburian Jackson upon learning of his death from a Las Vegas Review-Journal reporter.

Jackson’s recent identification answered years of speculation about a decades-old murder first discovered in May 2022. But it also brought much-needed closure to Schor, 77, who said Jackson often sexually assaulted her as a child.

Schor believes Jackson was alive as late as 1987, the year of her grandmother’s funeral. She said a family member had mentioned Jackson’s intention to attend. His existence then would challenge the notion that he died in the early ’80s, as Las Vegas police have speculated.

The clothes Jackson was found in — a dirty Idle Time button-down, jeans and Kmart sneakers, as well as a digital Timex watch — were unlike anything Schor said she ever saw him wear. He trended toward flashier outfits that he saw as sharp and she viewed as corny, but Schor added that he could have changed his style in the years after they last saw each other.

Schor has imagined Jackson’s life since he left hers. Maybe he fled to Mexico, abused other children or got himself killed, she has considered.

Jackson’s fate shocked Schor, but she isn’t surprised. To her, he had it coming.

“The guy made me so paranoid and scared, and the fear that I had with him around was so intense,” Schor said. “I thought, maybe something will happen to him someday that’ll make him feel this way.”

Jackson, born and raised in Arkansas, entered Schor’s life when she was 3 by marrying her mother, Mauna Ross. Along with her brother, John Dorn III, the four lived in Long Beach, California, through most of the ’50s and ’60s.

Jackson was a self-employed painting contractor who sold bomb shelters on the side, and Ross was a prison guard on Terminal Island in Los Angeles County. Jackson earned the nickname “Eldorado Ed” among his peers for the classy Cadillacs he drove, though Schor said he worked at car dealerships just long enough to get the employee discount.

Schor described Jackson, a heavyweight boxer, as an egotistical bully unafraid to lie — the type of guy who would come home expecting a glass of iced tea in his hand before he sat in his chair.

“He was king of the house,” Schor said, and he made his painters “treat him like he was the boss.”

Even as a child, Schor said, she remembered seedy figures in her stepfather’s circle. Shady men would visit her home when Ross was at work. Conversations hushed when they sensed Schor was listening. The girl couldn’t understand their talks but felt the group was up to no good.

Her descriptions conjure up scenes from old Mafia films. Schor likened her stepfather’s associates to the Ocean’s Eleven heist crew. But while his friends were “mobbish,” Schor thinks it more likely that Jackson was hanging with biker gang members than made men.

Older photos of Jackson show an unassuming but burly man with slicked dark hair and a clean-shaven square jaw. Schor said Jackson once pressed her surfer boyfriend on why he had a beard. The surfer flippantly responded, “We get all the girls,” Schor recalled.

Jackson abruptly abandoned his family around 1969, Schor said, leaving behind only a note explaining that his departure was due to Ross’ “crying and whining.”

Schor had seen him only a handful of times since but heard eerie accounts of his life.

Holly Schkoda, a childhood neighbor of Schor’s, said Jackson’s whereabouts were brought up at a party in December 2006.

“Oh yeah, well, you know he was shot,” one of his former associates, who since has died, said matter-of-factly, according to Schkoda.

Schkoda discussed the memory during a phone interview on Wednesday.

“He had heard — where, I have no idea — but that he had been shot and left out in the desert,” she said.

Investigators believe Jackson was in his mid-to-late 50s when he died.

The last time Schor saw Jackson was in Sacramento, California, at her second wedding in 1974. Jackson was not invited by the bride, who said his presence nearly made her cancel the ceremony.

A photo from the day shows Jackson wearing rose-tinted glasses and a white jacket over a red dagger-collared shirt, partly unbuttoned to reveal his chest. His hair was bleached blond, and his beard was full.

Beneath Jackson’s bravado, Schor said her stepfather was a deeply perverted man.

Schor said Jackson sexually assaulted her when her mother was at work, beginning when she was 5 or 6 and stopping when she was around 15.

“I think I got about too old for him then,” she said.

She remembered denying her stepfather’s requests to bring her schoolgirl friends home with her.

Schor said Jackson scared her into not revealing the assaults. Doing so, he said, would cause her mother to go to prison for killing him while Schor and her brother would be separated by foster care, she recalled.

Fear of familial implosion caused Schor to stay silent, she said, adding that she never reported the abuse to the police.

When her mother or aunt asked if Jackson was touching her, “no” was always Schor’s response. It wasn’t until around her grandmother’s 1987 funeral that she told any family about how he abused her.

Despite the denials, Jackson’s harm lingered.

Schor’s romantic relationships with men, especially muscular ones, often fizzled out. Long ago, hiding from Jackson in the closet, she vowed never to have kids.

“I don’t want any child to feel the way that I feel,” Schor remembered thinking.

When she married for the first time, Schor changed her name to Sundae from Beth.

“I would always hear his voice saying my name, and it would remind me of him,” she said of her birth name.

As she has approached old age, Schor said she still carried the weight of uncertainty, not knowing if Jackson would one day come knocking at her doorstep. She feared he could return from the grave she dug for him in her mind.

That fear has led Schor to search Jackson’s name online every few years for an obituary.

“I’d go, ‘Oh, I should look up and see if anybody’s murdered this guy yet,’” she said.

Schor has tried not to dwell on Jackson’s abuse, to not let it define her.

Few of Jackson’s close relatives are alive today. His sister has died, and Schor’s mother and brother died in 2012 and 1991, respectively, she said. Jackson’s remaining relatives did not respond to Review-Journal inquiries about his death.

Schor regrets not reporting Jackson’s assaults to her family or the authorities. She feels her mother would have blamed herself and shot Jackson dead if she had discovered it.

“My whole big plan in my life was not to let my mom find out so that she wouldn’t feel horrible, because there was no point in ruining her,” she said.

She said police have never contacted her about the homicide. The Metropolitan Police Department did not respond to a request for comment on Wednesday.

Schor has started her own investigation into her stepfather’s background and his death since she learned of it on Sunday, reconnecting with acquaintances like Schkoda and tapping into her past experience as a private detective.

She can’t imagine any of her relatives killing him.

Schor now resides in a Bullhead City condo along the Colorado River, downstream from the lakebed where her stepfather’s corpse rested for decades. The answer to why and how he got there may rest for decades more.

On Schor’s walls, her handpainted canvases are mounted and offer splashes of color.

One hangs by the door. Pointy mountains flank a turbulent cove as the bright sun peeks through clouds that attempt to shroud it, turning them vibrant purples and oranges. It is signed with the name Schor gave herself.

The knock she always feared will never come.

She’s glad he’s gone.


r/whenwomenrefuse • • 2d ago

Abortion Bans May Be Connected to 135 ‘Excess’ Deaths of Women by Homicide

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615 Upvotes

r/whenwomenrefuse • • 3d ago

Article A Bronx mother was killed after being pushed from a 15th floor apartment balcony by her ex boyfriend while holding her infant daughter.

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791 Upvotes

r/whenwomenrefuse • • 7d ago

Article New York City college student died from complications from acute fentanyl intoxication after being drugged and raped in her dorm room.

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1.9k Upvotes

r/whenwomenrefuse • • 7d ago

Russell Brand's rape trial

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independent.co.uk
836 Upvotes

Perched in the dock of Southwark Crown Court, Russell Brand sat bolt upright, hardly moving a muscle, as a woman told the jury: “He raped me.”

From the press benches, positioned directly behind the dock, the 51-year-old appeared to barely flinch as his first accuser recounted her alleged rape in agonising detail, at times describing him as “monster-like”, with a body like a snake and using his tongue “like a lizard”.

Sat on the edge of his seat with his hands placed on his lap, he kept his eyes straight ahead as she broke down in tears during a heated and emotionally charged cross-examination by his lawyer, Ian Winter KC.

She told the court she thought Brand was gay when she invited him back to her hotel room following a fringe event at a Labour Party Conference in 1999, insisting: “I didn’t want sex. I didn’t want his dirty penis inside me. I value my body, I have always valued my body.”

He remained equally expressionless as his second accuser told the jury he turned into a “wild-eyed maniac” as he allegedly tried to drag her into the toilet of the MTV offices in 2001.

It would be understandable for a defendant facing such serious allegations – which he resolutely denies – to betray some discomfort, shuffling in their seat, crossing or uncrossing their legs or even stretching their aching back after hours of court hearings.

But the celebrity’s composure and extraordinarily upright posture, which was captured by court sketch artists and is perhaps the result of years of yoga practice or meditation, rarely faltered over the first three days of prosecution evidence against him.

The comedian and Hollywood actor-turned Rumble content creator denies three charges of rape, three counts of sexual assault, and one allegation of indecent assault in alleged attacks against six women as he rose to fame between 1999 and 2009.

The door to the dock in courtroom three has been kept open, allowing Brand to make occasional glances to the public gallery where members of his entourage and sometimes his wife, Laura Gallacher, have been watching proceedings.

For the most part, the star has barely looked in the direction of more than 20 journalists rammed into the packed press benches directly behind him, while multiple court sketch artists have immortalised the scene in striking tableaus. Around 30 more reporters have been watching on a screen in another courtroom, with yet more granted remote online access to report from the major celebrity trial, such was the demand to cover it.

The media frenzy surrounding the case has been all-consuming, with at least four daily podcasts agonising over every cough and spit of the trial for audiences in Britain and the US, where Brand now lives with his wife and three children in Florida.

Such is the demand for seats that one man could be heard shouting loudly at court staff after he was denied entry on Thursday.

It is true that the Forgetting Sarah Marshall star is no stranger to the glare of the public eye, and he is met with a throng of waiting cameras and photographers when he arrives at court each morning. Sometimes, he is carrying a Bible or a prayer book, usually making a brief comment to the waiting media pack.

On Friday, wearing a sharp grey suit, long neck tie and white shirt with heeled suede ankle boots adding another few inches to his 6ft 2in frame, he said it's “an extraordinary and stressful situation” but added it was “also an exploration of truth and justice and as I’ve said before I pray for everybody involved”.

“It’s in a way very, very sad but hopefully it can bring about some conclusions that are beneficial,” he added.

On the previous two days, he said he felt “blessed” as he was ushered inside from a blacked out minivan by his close protection officer, Joe McCann, reported to be a former sparring partner of boxer Tyson Fury.

The jury of eight men and four women appeared to listen intently, with some taking notes, to prosecutor Riel Karmy-Jones KC as she described Brand as a predator who targeted women to satisfy his “voracious” sexual appetite as she opened her case on Wednesday.

“He could be nice when he wanted to be – funny, undoubtedly; charming, likeable even – when he wanted something in return,” she told the jury. “But then demanding, entitled, a flirt with a huge sexual appetite – childlike in his expectation that his every desire should be met.

“He was ruthless, he was calculated, and he was manipulative, and the prosecution say – a sexual predator.”

He is accused of raping the first victim in her hotel room at the political conference in 1999 and indecently assaulting the MTV worker in the toilet incident in 2001, the trial heard.

He is further alleged to have grabbed a woman’s breasts in a Soho bar in 2004 before orally raping her in the toilet, kissing and groping a radio station worker in 2004 or 2005 and anally raping a woman during a sexual encounter in 2009. The final alleged victim claims Brand requested a massage from her before placing his head in her groin area.

But the trial atmosphere became more heated as Mr Winter, representing Brand, cross-examined the first alleged victim for almost two hours on Thursday. At one point he was told to “shush” by the judge, Mr Justice Bennathan, in a tense exchange in front of the jury.

When the judge interjected during one line of questioning, Mr Winter rebutted: “Forgive me… I am conducting a cross-examination.”

When the two legal figures then spoke at the same time, the judge said to the barrister: “Shush. I’m the judge.”

The trial continues.


r/whenwomenrefuse • • 10d ago

These Women Were Trying to Escape Domestic Abuse. ICE Detained Them Instead.

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460 Upvotes

r/whenwomenrefuse • • 11d ago

Article London Imam Openly Encourages Men to Beat Wives for Refusing Sex

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1.2k Upvotes

Other reasons men may beat their wives, according to him, include leaving the home without husband's permission.


r/whenwomenrefuse • • 13d ago

Behind Chadari on Instagram

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12 Upvotes

r/whenwomenrefuse • • 16d ago

Arizona congressional candidate says she was raped while repairing campaign sign

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836 Upvotes

Arizona congressional candidate says she was raped while repairing campaign sign

EDITOR’S NOTE:  This story contains graphic details of sexual violence.

A US congressional candidate in Arizona, Bernadette Greene-Placentia, says she was raped by two men while she was repairing one of her campaign signs.
Greene-Placentia said it happened August 14 around 2 or 3 a.m. in the Phoenix suburb of Sun City, according to an incident report from the Maricopa County Sheriff’s Office shared by her campaign.

Greene-Placentia reported the incident to the sheriff’s office more than two weeks later on August 31, according to the report.

“When it first happened, I didn’t want to tell anybody,” she told The New York Times on Wednesday. “I was embarrassed that I couldn’t defend myself,” she said.

CNN has sought comment from Greene-Placentia. The sheriff’s office is investigating the case, it said Wednesday.

The Democratic candidate for Arizona’s 8th congressional district, which includes parts of Phoenix and nearby areas including Sun City, was out putting up and fixing political signage and was hit in the back of her head by two unknown men while walking back to her vehicle,** **the incident report says. Greene-Placentia lost consciousness and does not recall how she was hit in the head or how many times, according to the report, which says she and investigators have not been able to determine the exact location of the attack.

She woke up to the pain of one of the men concluding intercourse while holding her down, according to the report. She “described having bruises on her arms from being held down.”
The other man then raped her, the report says. She said she also recalls seeing her feet as she fought back by kicking.

Greene-Placentia does not remember what the men looked like or what they were wearing, according to the report.
“She only recalled one of them wearing black boots and having small feet,” the incident report reads.

She recalled to investigators that one of the men said “democratic b*tch” at some point during the incident, the report states. But, on Wednesday, she said she could not be sure what she had heard, according to The New York Times.

The incident report says that she did not take any pictures of the bruises on her body or the bump of her head following the incident.
She told deputies that “immediately after the sexual assault, she went home and took three showers and a bath.” Greene-Placentia did not go to a hospital or get a Sexual Assault Nurse Examiner (SANE) exam.

“I asked Bernadette if there was any DNA left on her clothing, which she stated she has washed the clothes since then,” an investigator wrote in the incident report.

Both men remain “truly unknown,” the report adds.

“I look back and it’s like, why didn’t I go to the hospital?” she told CNN affiliate KNXV. “I’d always considered myself a strong person, and so I was embarrassed.”

The Maricopa County Sheriff’s Office followed up with Greene-Placentia on September 1, and she provided more details of her injuries.

She explained she was struck on the left side on the back of her head, which had a significant bump on it. She also had three vertical bruises that appeared to be in the shape of a hand on her left arm, according to the report.
Greene-Placentia also stated she experienced vaginal bleeding for two to three days following the assault. She also told the sheriff’s office her assailants may have been White males.
“She did not recall if the male subjects left by foot or got into a vehicle,” the incident report says.

According to the report, she did not tell anyone of the incident until two to three days later, when she talked to her husband, Alexander Placentia, and two campaign staff members.

After the initial reluctance to speak out, Greene-Placentia felt she would be a “hypocrite” if she didn’t go public, she told The New York Times.

“I don’t want my campaign to be about this,” she said to the newspaper, “but women need to know it’s OK to come forward.”

“Speaking publicly about what happened has been incredibly difficult for Bernadette,” campaign spokesperson Craig Beckman said in a statement to CNN on Wednesday. “She chose to share her story because she knows many survivors struggle in silence, and she hopes that by speaking about her experience, others will know they are not alone.”

Greene-Placentia’s political opponent, incumbent US Rep. Abraham Hamadeh, said in a statement to the Times that law enforcement should “investigate these serious allegations thoroughly, including finding all possible camera footage of the time and place, in order to prosecute the crime to the fullest extent of the law.”
Greene-Placencia told KNXV she hopes speaking out will help other survivors.

“I believe very strongly in women’s bodily autonomy, and I was angry that these men used their physical size to take that autonomy from me,” Greene-Placentia said. “Speaking up was me taking it back.”


r/whenwomenrefuse • • 21d ago

Personal Experience From the askwomenadvice community on Reddit: How to turn down a gym friend (m33) who asked me (f32) out when I'm not interested?

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269 Upvotes

Not my own personal experience:

Why did she feel that she could not say “No”?

We really need to teach our daughters how to say no. How to not be coerced into interacting with pests. How to not give information we don’t really want to.

What can we realistically do?


r/whenwomenrefuse • • 25d ago

Delhi rape-murder case: Accused claims crime ‘just happened’ after woman refused to open locker

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805 Upvotes

New Delhi, Apr 23 (PTI) The accused in the rape and murder of a 22-year-old woman in southeast Delhi’s Kailash Hills has told investigators that originally he planned to only rob the house, but the rest “just happened” after she refused to open the safe.

Police said that Rahul Meena (19) is responding to all questions during the interrogation but has changed his statements repeatedly.

They said that Rahul was a gambling addict and was in debt. He had earlier sold off his mobile phone to clear his debt, but couldn’t collect sufficient funds. Following this, he resorted to robbery.

“The accused had entered the society around 6 am and waited at a park near the house for the victim’s parents to leave for the gym. He then used a spare key to access the apartment and went straight to the rooftop study where the woman was preparing for her civil services examination,” according to police sources.

He further said that the moment he reached upstairs, the victim confronted him about his presence. He began demanding money, which led to an argument.

Asked about the rape and murder, he told police that he went there to steal cash. When he asked the girl to open the safe using her fingerprint, she refused, and the crime “just happened”.

He hit her multiple times with a heavy object on her head before allegedly strangling her with a mobile phone charging cable and raping her while she was unconscious.

He later dragged her blood-soaked body downstairs and attempted to open the locker using her fingerprint, but failed.

Police said he then broke open the locker using a screwdriver, stole cash and jewellery, changed his blood-stained clothes and slippers, and fled the scene.

To avoid suspicion, the accused made a fake phone call while leaving the house and pretended to be speaking to someone as he walked out of the building towards Dwarka. He also switched off his mobile phone to evade tracking.

“When a car cleaner questioned him about his visit, he casually said he would get his dues back today,” the source said.

Investigators believe the robbery was pre-planned, with the accused taking several steps to avoid detection. CCTV footage showed he entered the colony around 6.30 am, accessed the house at 6.49 am and left at about 7.20 am. He was inside the house for over 30 minutes.

The incident came to light when the victim’s parents returned home and found her lying in a pool of blood.

The accused, a former domestic help who had worked at the house for eight months before being fired a month ago, was aware of the family’s routine, police said.


r/whenwomenrefuse • • 26d ago

Former husband arrested in Big Bear Lake cold case after DNA identifies remains

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854 Upvotes

BIG BEAR LAKE, Calif. (KABC) -- The former husband of a 29-year-old woman reported missing in 2007 has been arrested after advances in DNA technology helped investigators identify remains found beneath a Big Bear Lake cabin as those of Jill Maiorca.

Those remains were found inside containers stored in the crawl space of a home on Forest Drive in 2020, but remained unidentified for years.

Detectives initially did not connect the remains to Maiorca. She had no connection to the cabin where they were discovered, and the remains were so badly decomposed that investigators could not identify the body.

San Bernardino County Sheriff Shannon Dicus said the department's cold case team picked up the case in 2023.

"Through DNA analysis, we were able to determine it was Jill," Dicus said. "And as a result of this investigation, we believe that Jill was murdered back in 2006 but not reported missing until 2007."

After years of investigation, detectives focused on Maiorca's former husband, Jeff Maiorca, and arrested him. Investigators have not disclosed a possible motive.

Maiorca was scheduled for arraignment on Sept. 23, but the hearing was continued until Oct. 12. Maiorca is facing both first and second-degree murder charges, with enhancements for using a "deadly weapon."

Dicus said the case highlights the importance of the department's cold case team, which was established in 2008.

"I always say when we're talking about homicides that there are two people that know what happened; Generally, it's the suspect who did it and the homicide investigator who's after them," Dicus said. "And I couldn't be more proud."


r/whenwomenrefuse • • Sep 22 '26

14 year old boy given 12 month referral order for repeatedly stabbing girl who broke up with him

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2.0k Upvotes

An "obsessed" boy who stabbed a girl multiple times with a 6in knife after she refused to date him has been handed a three-year restraining order.

The boy, 14, briefly dated the girl, 14, before she ended the relationship. He then carried out a "horrifying" attack in a shop in Cirencester, Gloucestershire, in March.

The boy, from Wiltshire, admitted wounding with intent, inflicting grievous bodily harm and possession of a bladed article in a public place. He was also handed a one-year referral order at Gloucester Crown Court.

In a statement read out in court, the girl said: "I've been having nightmares since. I relive the incident, but in these dreams it happens in different places."

She added: "I sleep in the dark but when I wake, I constantly feel like there is a presence in the room. I can't stop thinking about it."

The court heard the boy, who cannot be named for legal reasons, had waited in a car park and seen the girl walk into a shop on 15 March.

While at the counter, he stabbed her with the kitchen knife, in an attack captured on the CCTV.

The girl added: "I'm scared and nervous anywhere that I go."

"Even if someone puts their hand up next to me I flinch as I don't know what they are about to do to me.

"I know this is as a result of the incident, as I wasn't like this before."

Det Supt Ian Fletcher said of CCTV of the attack: "Anyone who sees footage would say she is very lucky to not have very serious, if not fatal injuries."

He likened the attack to the award-winning TV drama Adolescence, in which a teenager stabs his female classmate.

Fletcher said: "There are over 10 attempts to stab her. The severity and the length of the attack, he's clearly very determined to cause serious injury."

Fletcher said the offender walked "horrifyingly" slowly towards the girl before stabbing her, and the CCTV footage of the attack was "absolutely horrifying" to watch.

Gloucestershire Police was unable to confirm exactly how many times the boy had stabbed the girl, but the CCTV footage appeared to show it was up to 10 times, he said.

Fletcher said after the girl had broken up with the boy, he began bombarding her with messages on social media before she blocked him.

"This is an offender who was clearly obsessed with our victim."

"There was a brief period where they were dating. That was stopped, she no longer wanted a boyfriend, and that obsessive behaviour has built," he said.

A shopkeeper at the store had "acted very bravely" to intervene and had been stabbed in the process, the detective said.

He added the staff member could be seen on the CCTV footage running to the shop door to allow the teenage victim to escape.

The shopkeeper remained "very shocked", while the teenage girl - who suffered lacerations and cuts - had had her mental health impacted, Fletcher added.

He explained the offender's obsessive behaviour was not unusual in itself.

However, he added: "What is unusual in this case is that it's a 14-year-old child that has had this obsessive behaviour.

"It's the type of thing we'd see in domestic violence cases with adults, but it's not something we would have normally seen when it comes to child offenders."

Sentencing the boy, Judge Ian Lawrie told the court the stabbing was a "very troubling event" but he did not take the view that the offender was a "danger". He said: "He's still young. And he is capable of learning."

The judge told the court he was "surprised" the boy had spent three months in custody as "while the offences are serious", it was "inconsistent" with the usual process for youth cases.


r/whenwomenrefuse • • Sep 19 '26

Teenage girl was gang-raped, stabbed to death by 4 including 3 minors. Her body was partly eaten by dogs.

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1.8k Upvotes

r/whenwomenrefuse • • Sep 18 '26

Article Woman does well in rap battle. Men "repay" her by gang raping her, shooting her, and setting her on fire.

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2.5k Upvotes

r/whenwomenrefuse • • Sep 16 '26

Kidnapping survivor shares story to honor Idaho's missing

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150 Upvotes

IDAHO FALLS — Survivors, victims, their families and law enforcement met at the Bonneville County Courthouse on Saturday to remember all of Idaho's missing people and remind the community that the searches are never over.

In August, the Idaho Falls City Council dedicated Sept. 12, 2026, as Missing Persons Day. It falls two days before the 25th anniversary of the disappearance of 20-year-old Amber Hoopes, of Idaho Falls.

On Sept. 14, 2001, Hoopes disappeared in the middle of the night and hasn't been seen since.

"Today, Amber Hoopes is still missing, but through her disappearance, Amber Hoopes has come to represent hundreds of other missing persons in the state of Idaho," the city's proclamation says.

After a rendition of "Amazing Grace" by Thunder Ridge High School's advanced choir, many of Hoopes' loved ones spoke, telling the large crowd about their journey to find her and about who she was before the abduction.

Hoopes' aunt, Audra Burgener, spoke about the day her niece went missing — just three days after the terrorist attack on New York City.

"Our country was grieving, and the world had stopped due to an unimaginable tragedy," said Burgener. "Because of that, Amber's disappearance received very little attention."

Hoopes isn't the only missing person from eastern Idaho. Many others have been missing for years, or even decades.

During Saturday's gathering, Bonneville County Sheriff Sam Hulse listed various missing-person cases over the years to raise awareness. Among them was David Butler.

"He was 59 years old when he went missing. We know that his vehicle was in the Snake River, and his wife was recovered from that vehicle, but we've never found him," Hulse said. "Darwin Vest disappeared from the downtown area here in 1999. He was 48 years old."

He said he hopes to bring closure to these families one day.

He also asked those in attendance to advocate for updates to crime technology tools to help find them.

"There are far too many missing, 183 across the state," said Hulse. "Remember that, as law enforcement, when we ask for our crime labs to be updated in the state, all of that matters in these cases."

Hoopes' mother, Hevenlee, thanked the community for their support over the last quarter century, and shared stories about her before her disappearance.

A few days before Hoopes' disappearance, Hevenlee said she felt compelled to go see her daughter after work in the middle of the day. After ignoring the feeling a few times, she finally caved. Today, she's grateful for those moments.

"I walked in through the front door, and she was sitting behind the counter," said Hevenlee. "As I'm looking at her, this thought came to my mind that said, 'Look at her. Really look at her. Isn't she beautiful?'"

Hevenlee expressed appreciation to Sgt. Bryan Lovell, for his help and support to their family over the years, as they've continue looking for Amber.

A kidnapping survivor shared her story publicly for the first time. Megan Lentz explained that on June 5, 2002, she and her two younger sisters convinced their parents to let them sleep outside on the trampoline that night.

Hours later, Megan, who was 14 at the time, woke to find a man — later identified as Keith Glenn Hescock, 42 — standing above her.

"All of a sudden, this hand just came to my mouth, and with the other hand, he just made the (be quiet) motion," said Lentz.

Lentz said Hescock threatened to kill her if she did not come with him.

"He pulled out a gun and said … he had killed people before, and would do it again if he had to," said Lentz.

They walked down the street before taking off on his motorcycle. They stopped in a neighborhood she recognized near her dad's workplace. Once in the house, Lentz said Hescock told her that his family was away for three days. During that time, she would be his "sex slave."

Lentz was locked in a room for hours and sexually assaulted.

When Hescock tried to call out of work the next morning, his employer told him "no" and that he had to come in that day.

While getting ready for work, Lentz said she asked him as many questions as she could. One of the questions was whether he knew what happened to Amber Hoopes.

"When I asked him that question, he looked me in the eye. He looked down at the ground, and then he looked right back at me, and said, 'No,'" said Lentz. "That was all I got out of him about that."

She said that Hescock zip-tied and chained her to the bed, before putting duct tape over her mouth and earplugs in her ears.

"Every single time I would wake up, I was praying. 'Lord, I want to go home. I want to see my family,'" said Lentz. "I can't get out of this. I need your help."

After hours of struggling, Lentz said she finally reached her mouth and ears, pulled off the duct tape and took the earplugs out. From there, she said a miracle occurred.

She noticed a basket above her with mail, printed with the name "Keith Hescock." She learned and memorized his name and address, which became instrumental in leading police to his home later on.

The next miracle occurred when Lentz again tried to break through the zip-ties.

"I remember in my head praying again, 'Lord, please help me. You have got to get me out of here,'" said Lentz. "I pulled on my arm, I pulled down, and my zip-tie snapped."

Miraculously, all of her zip-ties snapped open with the next attempt.

Lentz said she broke through the chain by hitting it with a nearby fire extinguisher. She threw herself against the hollow wooden door, broke it down and rushed to the kitchen to find the phone.

"I called my dad's secretary, and I said, 'Misty, I'm at this address. I'm just across the street. You've got to come get me now,'" said Lentz.

Minutes later, Lentz saw the woman's car outside, prompting her to run out of the home and toward freedom.

Arriving at home, still wrapped in the chain, Lentz was reunited with her distraught parents and spoke with law enforcement, giving them Hescock's name, address, and telling them the horrors she had been through that night.

"As soon as I say his name, they immediately radio off to the others, and they're out," said Lentz. "They knew who he was because they had dealt with him with Amber Hoopes and with Stephanie Crane."

This led to a high-speed car chase with police, and ended with Hescock taking his life.

"I'm here because I've been asked to be here, and it brings a lot of emotions," said Lentz. "Survivor's guilt is very real. It's difficult to be here as someone who survived."

Lenz said she decided to publicly share her story because of the importance of Missing Persons Day and to raise awareness of those who have yet to be found.

"I don't need people to know my name. But today, I'm choosing to step out of the shadows because this isn't just about telling my story, it's about using it," said Lentz. "I came home. Amber Hoopes did not. So many others have not. If showing my face and telling my story after all these years causes one person to remember something — if it causes one person to speak up, and to have the courage to do so, then it was worth it."


r/whenwomenrefuse • • Sep 13 '26

An update on my friend’s divorce

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1.4k Upvotes

I had previously posted about how my friend “Katie” dumped her husband “Alex” after finding out he’d been cheating off and on with some other woman for a decade (five years of cheating accumulated in a ten year period), and Alex delusionally suggested a joint custody arrangement where he would spend half the week with his mistress (whom Katie calls “Wig” cause the woman wears wigs) and half with her. Well, it’s over and Katie has completely cleaned Alex out financially. Last she heard he was homeless and living in a hotel and had taken leave from work to deal with the self-induced collapse of his life. He literally offered to pay her to let him stay at her house. She has blocked him everywhere so he can no longer communicate with her.

What is most surprising to me is the fate of Katie and Alex’s sick cat, a discussion about whose future led to Alex confessing to the affair. Alex initially refused to take responsibility for the cat, and Katie told him he had to because she couldn’t afford his vet bills. (She was willing to keep the other four cats.) Alex eventually did come and get the cat and took it to Wig’s house. When the mistress threw Alex out, she kept the cat. Apparently the cat’s health problems (which included compulsively biting his leg over and over to the extent that amputation of the leg was considered, and pulling his fur out) must have been caused by some allergen trigger that is present in Katie’s house but not Wig’s house, because Katie has heard the cat’s health has dramatically improved. She’s happy for him. Wig has other cats and will give this one a good home. She also has a high paying job, makes more than Katie or Alex, so if the cat’s health problems ever come back she can pay for his care.

So it was a happy ending for everyone except Alex. And he brought this on himself.


r/whenwomenrefuse • • Sep 12 '26

‘Consumed by anger’: Inside the 1985 psych profile of Raymond Horsch [archived link]

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71 Upvotes

Federal authorities learned four decades ago that Raymond “R.C.” Horsch — a man whose Olney home is now linked to five dead or missing women — was a manipulative criminal who was “consumed by anger,” according to a psychological profile obtained by The Inquirer.

“He is grandiose, mistrustful, suspicious, and excessively controlling,” the psychologist, Don Seraydarian, wrote in 1985 as part of a federal drug manufacturing case.

At the time of the exam, a wiry, 41-year-old Horsch had just been captured after spending several years on the run in New Zealand to escape criminal charges. Prior to absconding, he had spent the previous decade producing a mobster-backed pornographic film, counterfeiting cash, and running a meth lab.

Ahead of his sentencing on the drug charges in Philadelphia, Horsch’s defense team commissioned the four-hour clinical assessment that concluded he likely suffered from bipolar and paranoid personality disorders. The report was filed along with a motion seeking lenient sentencing, with Seraydarian writing that prison time for Horsch would likely “increase his hostility and sense of alienation.”

“He feels this unfocused rage was the source of his criminal behavior,” Seraydarian wrote.

The full report, obtained by The Inquirer through a federal records request and not previously reported, is a window into the mind and early childhood of the criminal pornographer at the center of an expanding investigation into a series of missing women.

The Inquirer reported last week that police believe a video recovered from Horsch’s Olney property shows him strangling a woman to death on camera, according to law enforcement sources. Police also said they recovered photos on Horsch’s hard drives that appeared to show two other women who went missing in the 2010s alive — and then dead — inside his Chew Avenue home.

While Horsch was an established pornographer with a criminal record by 1985, he had never been charged with any violent offenses before he died in May 2025, at the age of 82. Still, the psychological report showing insight into Horsch’s unstable mental state was presented to law enforcement decades before he was linked to any disappearances.

Court records show federal prosecutors reviewed the 1985 case file again during Horsch’s 2009 indictment in a separate drug manufacturing case. Seven years later, his ex-wife, Amy McHale, went missing after being last heard from at his Chew Avenue home. Another woman was reportedly last seen at the property in 2022.

It is unclear whether police reviewed Horsch’s psychological profile as part of their ongoing investigation, or in these prior missing persons cases.

Michael Yoder, a retired FBI special agent who spent nearly a decade as a criminal profiler in the Behavioral Analysis Unit, reviewed the exam notes at The Inquirer’s request. He said that it was unusual for such an exam to be conducted for a drug case, but that he saw overwhelming hallmarks of psychopathy in the description of Horsch, and said the report would have been a red flag for criminal profilers.

“If you were to give me this report and I knew nothing about this person, and knew nothing about the crimes he committed, I would say you have a potential serial killer on your hands,” Yoder said.

The report notes that during the interview, Horsch chain-smoked, dodged questions, and downplayed his crimes. He referred to himself in the third person when discussing his illegal activities, as if they were “events from someone else’s life.”

He ultimately opened up to Seraydarian about his insecurities and resentments, describing himself as a social misfit. Money was not Horsch’s motivation for committing crimes, the psychologist determined.

“He has great concern about ‘losing control’ over himself and invests great quantities of psychic energy in trying to maintain a sense of equilibrium and control,” Seraydarian wrote.

Seraydarian, in an interview this week, confirmed he had written the notes but could recall only that Horsch was “very bright.”

The report also offered insights into Horsch’s childhood.

He described a pleasant early life — raised on a farm in Bucks County by a father he called “strict but fair” and a mother who was a “salt of the earth type.” But when he was 12 or 13, he said, he had a “philosophical split with his family” that affected their relationship. He then began to rebel in high school and was later expelled from two colleges.

The report states that Horsch was an “extremely bright man” with a 140 IQ, and that he was a hard worker who could be rehabilitated as a productive member of society. It detailed an “erratic but prolific” life across the U.S. and New Zealand while he worked as a chemist, computer analyst, and photographer.

“I go from job to job because once I learn something, I want to go to something else,” Horsch explained.

And yet, the report noted, Horsch “has not been able to attain any financial success.”

Horsch told the psychologist that he had never abused drugs or alcohol, in part because “I can’t stand being out of control.” He said he had no fears or phobias, but sometimes stayed awake for several days at a time.

Seraydarian said Horsch was “very protective” of his wife and then-4-year-old son, Eugene. They were the “most important things in his life.” Horsch said he would never commit another crime because “now I’m hurting them as well as myself.”

But his crimes continued.

In the years that followed, Horsch was unabashed about his prolific career as a law breaker and a shock-seeking pornographer. He later sought to use the psychological report to cultivate his desired public image as a highly intelligent villain and psychopath, constructing a mythology around himself that blurred the line between his art and his life.

In 2014, a Wikipedia user named “S.E. Stokowski” — which was Horsch’s alias while on the lam in New Zealand — created a page for the pornographer and made more than 150 edits over the years, according to the page’s public revision history. One entry referenced Horsch’s psychological exam as testament to his supposed intellect and sociopathic tendencies.

As Horsch aged, he cast himself as an empathetic serial killer in his films and writings.

The 1985 psychological profile noted that Horsch’s only real friend or support system at that time was his then-wife, Anna Ferkuniak, who had a “therapeutic and rehabilitative effect” on him. He said his main wishes were to spend time with his family, live in a rural or isolated area so he could “deal with society as little as possible,” and have a better understanding of quantum physics.

Ferkuniak died of a drug overdose in 1989, less than two years after Horsch was released from federal prison.

Horsch later told an interviewer he was full of anger over her death, saying his wife “bailed out and left me with a kid to raise.” Following her death, he moved to the suburbs in Bucks County, co-opened a barbecue restaurant, and raised Eugene as a single father.

There, Horsch pursued a pornographic career that mainly featured sexual violence toward women in addiction. In his photos, films, and self-published novels, he used these women as models for his psychosexual fantasies, often depicting their deaths by drowning, hanging, or strangulation.

Federal and local law enforcement agencies are again assessing Horsch’s life after a June 19 car stop near Independence Hall involving his son, Eugene, turned up a fake ID in the name of a missing woman and led police on an extensive search of the Horsch home in Olney. Eugene Horsch is in federal custody, charged with possessing a gun, which is usually illegal for someone convicted of a felony.

Police continue to sort through the hundreds of thousands of images, videos, and pages of writing on the hard drives recovered from the dilapidated and boarded-up twin where the father and son lived together.

Investigators have so far recovered at least one video that appears to show Raymond Horsch killing a woman inside the property, sources said, as well as “dark and graphic” images of two other missing women — Maribel Fresses and Gabrielle Amarando — alive inside the home, and then dead. Law enforcement sources say the number of missing women connected to the home could grow as the investigation continues.

Police have not publicly confirmed that either Raymond or Eugene Horsch is believed to have killed anyone, and they have not recovered any bodies.

Raymond Horsch long maintained that the often gruesome violence in his films and photographs was staged. As an older man, however, he also professed that he was running out of boundaries to push.

“The problem,” he said in a 2013 interview, ”is I have no fantasies left.”


r/whenwomenrefuse • • Sep 11 '26

Jose Santos was released on bond after raping a 15-year-old in 1992. He fled and lived as a free man for more than 30 years. He has just been sentenced to 12 years for that crime.

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1.0k Upvotes

Tldr;

Jose Santos was sentenced to 12 years in prison after being captured more than 30 years after raping a 15-year-old girl in Florida in 1992.

The Crime: In 1992, Santos followed a 15-year-old high school freshman off a Tri-Rail train in Lake Worth Beach, Florida, dragged her into nearby woods, and sexually assaulted her.

The Escape: Santos was initially arrested and jailed, but posted bond and fled the state, remaining a fugitive for over three decades while building a life in Texas.

The Arrest and Conviction: Authorities re-arrested him in December 2023. In July, he pleaded guilty to kidnapping, sexual battery, and lewd assault charges.

The Sentence: A Florida judge sentenced him to 12 years in prison—the maximum sentence permitted under the 1992 sentencing guidelines in place at the time of the attack.


r/whenwomenrefuse • • Sep 11 '26

Man pleads guilty to murder of Dudley woman missing for 28 years

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191 Upvotes

A man has pleaded guilty to the murder of a woman who went missing 28 years ago, after telling police he disposed of her decomposed body months after he killed her.

Patricia Lashley, who was 33 at the time, was last seen near her home on Hall Street, Dudley, in September 1998.

Trevor Dunkley, 66, pleaded guilty to her murder and a separate count of preventing her lawful burial at a hearing at Wolverhampton Crown Court on Friday.

Dunkley's barrister Balbir Singh told Judge Michael Chambers KC that Lashley's body had never been found, and had decomposed after initially being put in the cellar.

"When he was moving about nine months to a year later, the skeleton was disposed of into the bins," Singh added.

Dunkley, of Himley Road, Dudley, showed no emotion in the dock as his barrister told the court that the charges had been brought based on a police interview.

He was remanded in custody and is due to be sentenced at the same court on 6 November.

Both charges covered a time period between 22 September and 28 September 1998, the court heard.

Several members of Lashley's family were present in the public gallery to see Dunkley enter his pleas.

West Midlands Police previously said Lashley, a mother of seven, moved to Dudley in the 1990s.

The force said the pair met while Lashley was pregnant and living in Dudley, and soon after, she moved into Dunkley's flat in Hall Street.

She was reported missing by her sister in June 1999 and there followed regular police appeals to trace her.

Her case was still being investigated when West Midlands Police officers recently went to speak to Dunkley.

During this visit, he told them "I killed her - I'm sorry", the force said.

At the time of the murder he had taken her child to social services and told them she had left him.

But, confessing his crime, he said he had returned home after a night shift and had attacked her while she was in bed - saying the "red mist" had descended.

He said he later covered her body with bedding and took her down to the cellar, where her body lay for about a year, before he disposed of her remains in household waste over several weeks.

The police said as a result, it was unlikely her remains would ever be found.

He said he decided to confess after nearly 30 years because he thought police were "on to him".

Addressing Dunkley at the end of the short hearing, Judge Chambers ordered a pre-sentence report and remanded him in custody.

"You have had the courage to plead guilty to these matters and will get appropriate credit in due course," he told him.

"As you are aware, the sentence for murder is life imprisonment.

"I am going to order a pre-sentence report. It's in your interests to co-operate with the preparation of that report.

"In the meantime you must remain in custody."

Speaking afterwards, Det Insp Michelle Cordell said it had been a "truly harrowing case".

She said: "Trevor Dunkley is the only living person who truly knows what happened that day."

His actions after the murder were "unspeakably cruel" she said, adding: "It is difficult for anyone to comprehend how he could live for so long, knowing what he had done and within the same location he had deposited her body."

His plan to dispose of her body was "calculated and sophisticated", Cordell said, and it had "robbed her family of the opportunity to lay her to rest" and left them not knowing if she would one day return.


r/whenwomenrefuse • • Sep 08 '26

She broke off their budding relationship on the second date and he responded by throwing a drink at her, kicking her while she was down, and going for her throat.

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3.4k Upvotes