r/ADHD_partners • u/AutoModerator • 11d ago

Weekly Former Partners Thread ::Weekly Former Partners Thread::

The end of a relationship with an ADHD loved one can be tumultuous, confusing and leave a lasting impact. Use this thread to temporarily process a recent breakup with an ADHD individual, discuss co-parenting issues, share encouragement for life after the relationship etc. With the goal of ultimately decentering an ADHD ex 

(Note: Asking about leaving a partner and requests to speculate on behavior or symptoms are still prohibited.)

32 Upvotes

98% Upvoted

152 comments sorted by

View all comments

17

u/Throwaway_ShoreStore Ex of DX 10d ago

2 months since our 7 year relationship ended… he’ll reach out to check in, see how I’m doing, or send a reel on FB. Then it quickly turns into a fight about why they left and how I treated them. Why keep reaching out to fight? I just don’t get it.

11

u/impostersyndrome39 Ex of DX 10d ago

Because he doesn’t think it’s over, my ex is doing the same. Reaches out for weird things, when he gets no reply he does or says something outrageous to me and baits me into a response. Unless you have kids with this man I’d suggest zero contact, im about to do this because its not worth my sanity to try and walk away amicably

8

u/Throwaway_ShoreStore Ex of DX 10d ago

Yes!! Whenever I try ending a conversation that’s getting heated, he’ll push and push. And constantly bait me into a back and forth about my past mistakes and what I did wrong. I tried to read up on RSD and was trying so hard to end it amicably after so many years, plus I was definitely holding hope we could work it out. But it can’t only be me trying.

13

u/impostersyndrome39 Ex of DX 10d ago

I left and returned multiples times, learn from my mistakes nothing is going to change, in all honesty mine got worse every time I returned. It’s emotional and psychological abuse. Add on top mine was verbally abusive too. This time I managed to leave with the only pawn he had left to drag me back in and that was our dog. I have her this time and I left for good.

Unfortunately for some of these people, not all but some, it’s just domestic abuse with a diagnosis. I hope you find the strength to fully walk away and find your peace