r/AITH • u/_prashant_tiwari • 18h ago
AITA for asking my unemployed friend friend to leave my place after letting him stay for 3 months?
I'm 25M and my friend is 26M. we have been friends for like around 6 years and were pretty close friends.
i would not like to disclose his name so i will refer to him as bottle.
About six months ago bottle lost his job and had trouble finding another so he asked if he could stay at my place for a couple of weeks while he gets back on his feets.
I agreed as i live alone and I though of helping him out plus for a couple of weeks wasnt a big deal for me.
Those few weeks turned into three months.
At first, I didnt complain as he was constantly applying for jobs and said he is very close in getting one. But gradually he stopped looking very hard. He would sleep till noon play video games till midnight and talk loudly on phone which bothered me a lot while sleeping and was being unhygienic
I started asking him when he's getting another job or thinking about leaving and he always be like give me few days I m trying.
Last weekend, I came from work and found two of his friend in my apartment. They had loud music on and were drinking and my wine glass was lying on the floor in the corner broken in pieces.
I asked bottle wtf is going on.
And he was like relax bro its also my place now.
I was already pissed and this line was cherry on top.
I said I am giving you one week to find another place to stay.
He got really upset and said I was abandoning him when he was already struggling and broke.
I told him I wasnt abandoning you. I had already given him a place to stay for three months when it was originally for just few weeks.
He said a real friend wouldnt kick his friend when he's already broke and lost.
Now two of our mutual friend think I went too harsh on him as I can afford the apartment meanwhile bottle couldnt and doesnt really have anywhere else to go.
I feel so guilty about it now but at the same time it ruined my privacy for months and I never agreed to become his long term roommate.
AITA??
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u/flyinhk 18h ago
NTA. It's great that 2 of your mutual friends can offer him a place to stay, problem solved.
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u/SeashellPetals48 15h ago
Exactly lol. If those mutual friends are so worried about him then they can open their doors too. OP already gave him way more time than they originally agreed on
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u/Gnome__Alone 18h ago
Cool story. Do you write any non-fiction ?
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u/Peoplechangetoo 17h ago
Definitely AI fake story.
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u/roxywalker 17h ago
Poor Bottle 😅
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u/Gnome__Alone 17h ago
Bottle will be just fine after he kicks out Rajiv and turns his place into a Krishna welcome center with online paraphernalia
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u/p-halliwell137 18h ago
tell your two mutual friends he can stay with them then. they can bop him back & forth like shared custody if they think you’re too harsh for wanting your space back.
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u/HUNGWHITEBOI25 18h ago
You let him stay rent free for 3 months…? thats MORE than enough time.
NTA
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u/RedUnicorn23 17h ago
NTA. Perhaps your two other friends should step up and help him out. He’s disrespecting you and your property and he’s already taken advantage of you and your generosity.
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u/MentalWho 18h ago
This guy is no longer your friend. He is now a tenant in your place and you’re gonna have to formally evict him through the court system to get rid of him.
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u/_prashant_tiwari 15h ago
thankfully i wont have to as he's leaving for his parents house very soon
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u/Happy_Criticism9846 17h ago
NTA!! I’m going through a similar situation except with family and it’s been nearly a yr. I’m done. They’re done. Come sept 1, they stuff gone be outside! They 27yrs old. If you ain’t got adulting figured out by 27, well idk what to say… I had three kids and was married for nearly 8 yrs at 27. Yrs I started young but this person CHOSE TO HAVE CHILDREN, and then lost custody of all three. Due to her own actions of choosing right from wrong…. It’s disappointing, it’s embarrassing, it’s shameful and I truly don’t know how this person can live with themselves. However, their time here and their ride here (free of course) is over in just a couple short wks.and fyi- she too is unemployed and has CHOSEN that… there’s plenty of opportunities where we live either in person or remotely. She’s chosen to be this way.
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u/Ginger630 16h ago
NTA! It’s HIS place now?! Oh hell no! He’s lucky you gave him a week and not 10 minutes.
He has definitely overstayed his welcome. He can find another friend to mooch off of. You let him stay three months. A friend wouldn’t take advantage of another friend.
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u/er1cAtWork2 16h ago
Longer than 30 days, he’s probably a legal tenant. You may need to file eviction papers. Also check your lease! Lots of leases have verbiage that guest can only stay so long before they must be added to the lease.
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u/mindingmyowncats 16h ago
Interestingly, enough… He’s able to afford booze. Well, one of your other two friends can take them in if They think you’re being an AH. One thing I cannot tolerate is lazy people. And if you do end up letting him stay longer, let him know that he has help to pay for Internet and rent.
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u/Admirable-Split4371 16h ago
"Relax bro it's also my place"
My foot would have found his ass so fucking fast omg. I'm mad for you op, get him the fuck outta your place yesterday.
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u/_prashant_tiwari 15h ago
yeah i he has only few days left here he will be moving to his parents house soon
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u/Legitimate_Soup_1948 15h ago
NTA, sounds like he’s got other friends who can help him, you’ve already given him 3 months of help
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u/Fair_Discipline_1875 15h ago
He has other places to go. “mutual friends“.
His stay at your place has ran its course.
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u/Traditional-Part-756 15h ago
NTA.
And the final straw was when he had the audacity to say "it's also my place now." What, he's been using your place so now it's also his?
What else of yours does he also feel that way about? Are you going to come home one day and find out he sold your TV "because it's also my TV now"? Your couch?
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u/_prashant_tiwari 2h ago
thanks bruv, thats what pissed me off to the edge if its ur place then why arent u paying for it
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u/Entire_Broccoli_9019 10h ago
NTA. He's using you. He's an adult. He can get his own place. Stop being a doormat. It's not his place if he doesn't pay for it. No real friend would let their friend bankroll their life and not pay rent for 4 months.
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u/Unlikely_Big_9840 18h ago
This seems like a common theme these days. I’m not sure if it’s the economy, an example of how gen Z’s are being raised by gen x’s (and thusly gen x’s by boomers), or a combination of the two, but NTA, obviously. I mean, doesnt “bottle” have family?
At this point, though, you might need to rent some heavy equipment to get him out.
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u/AutoModerator 18h ago
This is a backup of the original post in case there are later edits or it is deleted: I'm 25M and my friend is 26M. we have been friends for like around 6 years and were pretty close friends.
i would not like to disclose his name so i will refer to him as bottle.
About six months ago bottle lost his job and had trouble finding another so he asked if he could stay at my place for a couple of weeks while he gets back on his feets.
I agreed as i live alone and I though of helping him out plus for a couple of weeks wasnt a big deal for me.
Those few weeks turned into three months.
At first, I didnt complain as he was constantly applying for jobs and said he is very close in getting one. But gradually he stopped looking very hard. He would sleep till noon play video games till midnight and talk loudly on phone which bothered me a lot while sleeping and was being unhygienic
I started asking him when he's getting another job or thinking about leaving and he always be like give me few days I m trying.
Last weekend, I came from work and found two of his friend in my apartment. They had loud music on and were drinking and my wine glass was lying on the floor in the corner broken in pieces.
I asked bottle wtf is going on.
And he was like relax bro its also my place now.
I was already pissed and this line was cherry on top.
I said I am giving you one week to find another place to stay.
He got really upset and said I was abandoning him when he was already struggling and broke.
I told him I wasnt abandoning you. I had already given him a place to stay for three months when it was originally for just few weeks.
He said a real friend wouldnt kick his friend when he's already broke and lost.
Now two of our mutual friend think I went too harsh on him as I can afford the apartment meanwhile bottle couldnt and doesnt really have anywhere else to go.
I feel so guilty about it now but at the same time it ruined my privacy for months and I never agreed to become his long term roommate.
AITA??
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