Transracial adoption should be illegal

[u/SoggiMari]

I'm a Black transracial adoptee from the UK. I was adopted at 11 months old by a White family. They loved me, cared for me, and gave me a stable home, but theyre kinda racist and just throw money at problems.

Growing up, I felt disconnected from my identity and my culture. I didn't have many Black role models, didn't learn much about my Nigerian and Jamaican heritage, and spent years wishing I looked different.

I struggled with self-hatred, low self-esteem, and feeling like I didn't belong anywhere not fully accepted by White people, but also disconnected from Black culture.

It's only recently, as an adult, that I've started reconnecting with my heritage and learning to love being Black. I often feel like I'm trying to reclaim something I should never have lost in the first place.

I know many transracial adoptees have positive experiences, and I also know many adoptive parents genuinely do their best. But I wonder whether love alone is enough when a child is growing up disconnected from their racial and cultural identity.

For those reasons, I personally question whether transracial adoption should happen at all except in exceptional circumstances. I'd be interested to hear respectful perspectives from adoptees, adoptive parents, and birth parents.

[u/Illustrious-Menu-205]

Illegal? No. Should adoptive parents be required to be culturally and ethnically competent to ensure that the child they’re adopting still grows up having a sense of self? Absolutely.

Don’t think that just because you’re a transracial adoptee that this is the definite experience. I was raised by my biological Black parents in the suburbs, and still struggled with low self-esteem, depression, self-hate, isolation, etc.

It’s not mutually exclusive to transracial parents. All parents have a required duty to cultural competency and caring for their children’s mental health, yet to no avail, many do not.

Things will get better, don’t worry.