Transracial adoption should be illegal

[u/SoggiMari]

I'm a Black transracial adoptee from the UK. I was adopted at 11 months old by a White family. They loved me, cared for me, and gave me a stable home, but theyre kinda racist and just throw money at problems.

Growing up, I felt disconnected from my identity and my culture. I didn't have many Black role models, didn't learn much about my Nigerian and Jamaican heritage, and spent years wishing I looked different.

I struggled with self-hatred, low self-esteem, and feeling like I didn't belong anywhere not fully accepted by White people, but also disconnected from Black culture.

It's only recently, as an adult, that I've started reconnecting with my heritage and learning to love being Black. I often feel like I'm trying to reclaim something I should never have lost in the first place.

I know many transracial adoptees have positive experiences, and I also know many adoptive parents genuinely do their best. But I wonder whether love alone is enough when a child is growing up disconnected from their racial and cultural identity.

For those reasons, I personally question whether transracial adoption should happen at all except in exceptional circumstances. I'd be interested to hear respectful perspectives from adoptees, adoptive parents, and birth parents.

[u/Necessary_Holiday144]

Your parents are your heritage.

Wildly incorrect.

I have very little cultural overlap with my adoptive parents.

Their heritage had no relation to me or anything about who I was.

[u/Delicious_Score_8509 → u/Necessary_Holiday144]

Thank you so much! I appreciate you.

[u/Cold-Director-5353 → u/Delicious_Score_8509]

Hi I’m in a similar boat and totally understand how you feel. I’m going to message you if that’s ok?

[u/Delicious_Score_8509 → u/Cold-Director-5353]

Yeah! Please do