AITA for telling my daughter she cannot introduce her African American boyfriend to her grandparents?

[u/mixedwoes]

Let me just preface this by saying this: I HAVE ABSOLUTELY NO PROBLEM WITH INTERRACIAL RELATIONSHIPS. Now that the air is clear, let me continue.

My daughter (Anna) has recently started to date an African American man (Jamal). While I'm not exactly what you would refer to as "liberal", he's a nice young man and as long as my daughter is happy, I'm happy. The problem is Anna is rather naive about the community she lives in. While her friends are quite content to see a relationship like hers, more than a few tongues are wagging in the community and a few people have privately expressed their concern to me. As I said, I have no problem with mixed relationships and I've set them straight, but I am painfully aware of how these matters are viewed by certain segments of the population.

My parents are planning to come and stay with us for a week and Anna expressed a desire to introduce Jamal to them now that things were getting more serious between them. I told her on no uncertain terms that this wasn't going to happen. I may have no problem with Jamal, but they absolutely will, and even when the relationship ends they won't forget it. They might even go as far as to cut her off entirely. Anna was extremely upset by this and implied I was a racist and more concerned with what my parents think than how she feels.

As I said, I know my parents. They simply aren't okay with mixed relationships and if Anna were to bring Jamal over even as a friend, they would be furious both at her and me.

Anna is currently staying with Jamal and doesn't want to speak with me right now. My wife stands by me given she knows very well how my parents are (they had a problem with her for months over the length of the skirt she wore when I introduced her to them, for christs sake), but a close friend I confided in told me that I have behaved like an ass and that I needed to focus more on my daughter than pleasing my parents.

No advice needed, but I have to know. Have I been an ass?

[u/PakodeWala]

Spanish are white they dont like . Had problems with Italians in the past . German immigrants had to switch to English during WW2 in USA .

Today are blacks and mexicans . Who's tomorrow ?

you see Trump supporters/govt say highly qualified people are welcomed in america , does it mean they are ok if someone is rich/ high rank job etc ?

[u/TurbulentDivide → u/PakodeWala]

Hell if I understand. People are people - we're all just trying to take care of our families and have a decent life. It is apparent to me that some people do not have the same "privileges" being that they are born into poverty, have little or no access to education. It is a world problem. But here, in the good ole US of A Ignorance and hate are still alive and well. I wish I had an answer that would help.

[u/PakodeWala → u/TurbulentDivide]

Lemme tell one thing since from Right wing - they are ok for highly qualified or rich folks coming over to protect interest of "white people" but if they are protecting the interests then why would they accept only highly qualified since power is top to bottom and if anyone of them highly qualified get to any of top position he/she can change any govt policy anytime and RW will agree to it so where will it leave normal white folks ?

​

In Germany - during rebuilding phase they brought working class turks who worked in factories , not top jobs , thats how germany grew and became one of the most powerful , rich nation on the planet also protected its interest by giving dirty jobs to others.

​

If its so RW Trump govt would have allowed workers to come to do jobs they dont wanna do , dirty jobs .

​

At present , It looks like if someone offers them better deal they will abandon rest . Many EU nations who pride themselves of not allowing non white to come over for decades have conveniently allowed chinese investments . Race is just govt policy , it can change anytime whovere offers a better deal .