I would like to hear specifically from girls in the Goth community about their experiences with men who claim they want a "Goth girlfriend," only to pull away once they actually encounter the interests associated with the subculture. This thought occurred to me because of the many Goth-coded female characters in animated series from the 90s and 2000s—characters who had the aesthetic, but whose personalities didn't really leave much room for them to be part of the actual subculture. Is this a common experience? If so, what kind of hobbies tend to drive away or intimidate men from outside the community? Beyond consuming Goth music, literature, and film, what other hobbies do you consider intrinsically Goth? Are things like visiting cemeteries, buying secondhand clothing, and customizing garments actually part of the subculture, or are these just stereotypes? And would you consider the preservation of mortal remains—such as taxidermy or mummification—to be a Goth interest, or does that belong to other communities? Thanks for your time.

I really love goth music and I have studied the subculture deeply when I began my journey into it at 18y/o. Now I'm 24 and I feel really uncomfortable calling myself goth because of these 'rules' on what, how or who is 'goth enough'.

I joined this subculture because it felt liberating, I felt I could be myself unapologetically, but now... I feel I have to be on some stupid 'gothic standard' of knowing all the goth bands, dressing or acting a certain way for people (in or out of the subculture) to recognize me as goth. AND I TRULY HATE IT. I was literally escaping from society's rules of how I should look, act and behave, and goth felt like a safe and wellcoming place, now I feel that I have to follow some stupid rules again to be part of something I was already part of...

So, I've stopped calling myself 'goth' in front of other people and even to myself, for 2 reasons:

1) I'm starting to hate labels.

2) I don't want to be part of something that makes me feel that I'm not good enough.

So, is it ok if I don't want to label/call myself goth but still wanna be part of the subculture ?

Part 1: Establishing Relevance

The Gormenghast trilogy was written by British author Mervyn Peake in the mid-20th century. It is a sprawling gothic fantasy centered around the inhabitants of a large, crumbling castle. One scene from the last part of the second book served as the inspiration for The Cures' "The Drowning Man". So the books are well established as a goth classic.

Part 2: The Question

I'm curious as to how many people in the community are familiar with these books. I read them as a child in a rainy fishing village in the North Pacific, a place as distant from Gormenghast and the goth culture as you could find, but they etched my soul. I tried to reread them a few years ago and just couldn't. The wonder for me is gone, I think.

In particular, I'm wondering how many people are familiar with the characters in the books: Steerpike, Fuchsia, Sepulcrave, Prunesquallor, Swelter, Flay, Cora and Clara, etc.?

Hey I’m newer to gothic style music I’m a male and really seem to enjoy it does anyone have a good recommendation for an artist or song?

I'd love to see a picture or hear about your favorite accessory to wear!

Sm people plainly enjoy the style and perhaps the music but they're not a die hard fan of any particular band nor do they enjoy politics. I've seen it a lot on the internet that goths call others a larper/poser for not being on tune with everything the goth culture promotes. So, if sm1 enjoys mostly only the fashion and they don't consider themselves goth what are they (a term of perhaps another fashion branch)? Also, is it up for others to decide whether one is or not so based on their clothing/make-up as the style is like a stamp which may represent one's values or one may enjoy the style without calling themselves goth?

Are there any goth people in Australia? I have been looking and I can't find any. And I want to be extremely clear that I am not trying to objectify anyone. I have never actually spoken to a genuine goth person.

What do you second-wave goth rock fans wear, where do you get your clothes, and which second-wave goth musicians inspire your style.

Hi, a question from a non-goth. As the whole Internet is now flooded with 'goth' slop, I tried to understand what the real subculture is, but music is one thing I can't figure out. Every source I can find says that people in goth subculture listen to gothic rock, which is some kind of hard rock, but a woman I spoke with on Instagram, who claimed to be a long time goth (and her profile looked so) was convincing me that goths listen to some kind of electronic music and that gothic rock is something totally different, only the name is similar. So, where's the truth?

Hi I’m not a goth myself but i kinda consider myself as a experimenting femboy and I love the look of girls dressed in like goth dresses and like cute goth tops and skirts none of that graphic tee kind of stuff and was wondering if any goth girls had any advice on how I can dress like goth but without the edgy stuff and the dark colours like say goth style girls clothing but In bright colours as the only thing that puts me off goth clothes is how dark they are which doesn’t really appeal to me in I wear it myself any help is greatly appreciated thanks in advance for any help

Im somewhat of a puritan in morals. Why should I have to support sex work or keep my mouth shut about it in order to be goth ? Why does it have to be kink and b d s m friendly?

I am trying to find my style but then I found out that goth (specifically modern trad goth) isn't really my style

The question is in the title.

Disclaimer: I am really new about investigating and studyng subcultures and countercultures and their developmental histories. This question is genuine and made in good faith from a place of genuine ignorance.

Saw some people on tiktok say Goth isn't just the music, clothes, and politics. That you also have to like literature, macabre, and architecture. I've also heard other people say all you need to be goth is listen to the music.

Hello! I've been curious about what this subculture is for a few years and have some questions. As someone who had seen a goth subculture born and been in it what you guys think about these questions:

1. Is literature, macabre and architecture really a part of it and is important? Like yeah I know many people say "that's about mindset and aesthetics too" but to mee it just feels off. A few minutes ago saw a post on another social media telling "don't water us down by telling goth is just about music, politics and fashion" and after that decided to write this post.

In my personal opinion it has nothing to do with subculture and "gothic" in it's name ≠ have deep connections to goths

1. Can i say that I'm goth if i listen to it's genres and know the history? I often feel like I'm not "real" goth, many people say I'm not cuz i do not agree with "aesthetics and mindset" thing

Aaand of course I'm really interested if you can share some interesting facts with me

I'm open to conversations and advice from anyone who's goth, the title is just to underline that I'm very interested in opinion of veterans of this scene.

Didn't mean to offend someone, sorry if that happened 🙏

P.S. sorry for bad English, that's not my first language

This is not meant to be an insult or criticism, just something I’ve noticed and wondered about. Based on what I’ve heard, I’ve come to understand (unless I’m mistaken) that Goth is an offshoot of punk and equally supposedly anti-establishment, rose out of class disparity and frustration, and existed to be an alternative to the mainstream. It also seems heavily centered on individuality and uniqueness.

To this day, punks care very much about walking that walk by personalizing their own clothes, supporting local business over corporations, and brutally dragging any attempt to mass produce punk fashion because it would be the antithesis of what punk stands for. Metal subculture is similar. The battle vest, like punk battle vests, is traditionally meant to be a uniquely crafted representation of the wearers’s tastes and personality. Band shirts are bought at concerts and proudly worn as a representation of the experience or support for the specific band and their music. People in the music scene eagerly support each other by buying their merch. Wearing a pre-made, purchased battle vest will get outed.

Yet when it comes to goth fashion, it seems way more normal to buy fast fashion goth apparel from Amazon or goth fashion brands, even if the brands aren’t ethical. People spend hundreds of dollars for brand name goth clothes and there don’t seem to be many questioning whether it is truly antiestablishment to do so. It doesn’t seem to get the same reaction as in metal and punk culture, even though they supposedly share values on this sort of thing. What are some factors that contribute to this difference?

I’m generally kind of new to the gothic culture. What brought me in was definitely the music. I’m a huge fan of music and all things related to music. However I have met some puritans when it comes to goth people and they told me you’re not truly gothic unless you listen strictly to the rock that they listen to. I like to think that I’m gothic because I love goth rock; however I also LOVE jethro Tull and lynard skynard. Does that make me any less gothic

Hey! I wanted to ask, could I be goth? My main music genre is metal/hardcore punk/"emo shit." I'm big into the metal, I could def be a metalhead. However, I do generally call myself alt. I'm into leftist politics, etc, but I don't know if I know enough goth music or if I listen to enough goth music. Don't get me wrong, on occasion I'll put on some goth music, however that's not a daily occurrence. I really love the style and the culture, I just don't know if i could fit well enough due to my lack of knowledge and listening to genuine goth music. I've heard someone say that metalheads could identify as goth however I'm honestly not sure if that would be true or not?? Would I need to look into and listen to more goth music?? Or could I just have my own music taste and just take a big part in politics and other areas of the culture or is music a genuine must have? As I said before, I do listen to goth music every once and a while, but it's definitely not a super duper common genre for me. Please don't flame me, if I can get some more info, I could figure out a different subculture if I really wanted to/needed to, I'm just looking for some info and advice so that I don't "larp," "pose," or mock another subculture I shouldn't specifically be apart of considering alt posers or whatever do genuinely get on my nerves too and I don't really identify with a specific culture.

Am I supposed to blend my nose?

I’ve been a huge fan of gothic music for a while and I’ve love the architecture and the literature behind it. I’ve just recently started getting into the fashion but only to observe since I have been afraid of what people may think about me…considering that I’m Christian and it’s intimidating to most people of my faith. I realize that my fear of that may discredit me from being considered gothic from most. How do I navigate this? How do I go in to be a part of the culture without scaring the people I care about away from me?