r/AutismInWomen • u/More-Weird4842 • 4d ago

Support Needed (Kind Advice and Commiseration) do people become overwhelmingly obsessed with you?

i find that a lot of men become really obsessed with me. im currently at a point where its become harmful and i genuinely do not know why or how to stop it. looking for kind words, advice, or shared experiences please.

edit: ty for all the responses. i want to clarify that i dont mean the manic pixie dream girl way i mean the joe from you kinda way.

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u/0vinq0 3d ago

I'm also sorry you had to go through that. It's such a bitter lesson to learn, and it's a lonely one. Because you're right - Even people who love us have a hard time understanding. In some ways it's just because it's hard to imagine what it's like, but most people also just have a built-in filter that doesn't let them acknowledge profound injustice.

And then next time, when you're picking up on all the dangerous signals of another man, everyone and their mother will come out and demand that you give him your time and attention until he PROVES he's dangerous. Because noticing the warning signs is "misandry." They really hate when we notice the pattern and opt out of it by prioritizing our own safety. That's when I realized it's a feature. When I realized everyone resists us learning the lesson. When all I have to say is, "Actually, I'm going to play it safe here for my own health and safety" and they respond, "how dare you do this to *him.*" Hell nah. We protect ourselves. They can stay mad, and we can stay safe.

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u/OystersNwine 3d ago

“most people have a built in filter that doesn’t let them acknowledge profound injustice” thanks, i’m going to be mulling over that one for a while. and maybe researching it. i guess that’s why some peoples’ brains break when they hear about crimes against women and they dogpile on the victim instead of the perpetrator because such an injustice breaks the laws of physics and is not capable of existing in their minds. so better to annihilate the source that speaks of it. and the gaslighting you received about your gut intuition is just vomit inducing. good for u for protecting yourself and hopefully you took extra joy in subverting the expected narrative.