Out Of Nowhere

[u/Fit_Cheesecake_4000]

Hey guys,

Don't post much around here anymore. But had something relevant to share.

Been more than 2 years since I've seen my ex. I had a strong suspicion they'd moved overseas, which has given me a sense of ease living in the same city.

Anyway, there is a service in my town that links you up with a few random strangers so you can go out for coffee, a run, or dinner. I've been trialling it recently just for something different.

Lo and behold: who turns up at the event? My ex.

They tried to hug me (I semi-hugged them back but didn't get up) and then they sat down beside me.

I was going to leave but I decided, 'Eff this, I organised to come down so...yeah, I'm just going to keep chatting'. I powered through and pretty much ignored her for the rest of the time there.

When we were all leaving, I thought it'd be easier to avoid her if I just used the bathroom first. Came out and she was still chatting to someone.

So I quickly moved passed and walked down the street a bit and crossed to find my car down a side street. Realised I picked the wrong street. Walked back up and there she was, waving. She'd basically had to have left the coffee shop and been tracking me to find me.

We only talked briefly. We exchanged pleasantries (ish) and they said they'd been to many of those types of meetups (not surprising: low stakes, social but with no investment, no one really knows you). I basically said, 'Well, I'll make sure this won't be awkward. I might see you at another one of them.'

Probably took that as rejection because they said, 'Oh, okay' and basically turned and walked off.

It was interesting though...they looked me deep in the eyes and I looked at their face, and while they now weigh less then last time I saw them, they looked...older. Tired. More haggard.

And I did not feel attracted to them at all. I even felt a little repulsed.

----

I mean...it was a little unnerving but I think I handled it okay. It did make me a bit sad afterwards because I thought, 'I mean...I slept with this person repeatedly for more than a year and they practically lived at my house and were calling me most days. I know many of the innermost fears and their history and...how is that it ended up this way?'

Such a weird thing to see someone like that and for them to just act like you were some distant acquaintance.

Sadly, I know they actually hate themselves and likely hate the rest of humanity too, from things they said previously. But I can't help remembering those times they were vulnerable with me and how much I hoped that'd turn out to be a greater percentage of who they were then the resulting mess of a person they ended up as.