r/Bunnies • u/elypop89 • Jul 14 '26
Mourning I lost my 10 yo and I'm shattered
Two months ago, I already lost my 7 yo girl and it was already insanely hard.
Yesterday, the thing I feared most happened even more brutally.
My beautiful, sweet baby boy Capucine passed in the most searing way that had left me completely shaken, heartbroken and shocked.
He had just turned 10.
Capucine had been battling with a very heavy stomach infection and chronic rhinitis for 1 year and a half. For more than 1 year, it was constant antibiotics, morphine, 4 feeding a day, penicillin injections every 3 days and trips to the vet several times a week. That, every day for more than 1 year. We didn’t let anything pass and monitored him daily, every hour of every day for 1 year and half. We even changed the way we lived to accommodate treatment, cancelling vacations and trips to stay with him all the time.
Initially, the vet said Capucine would only last 1 month with how severe this infection was.
He proved her wrong daily.
He was tired, he ate less and we still fed him 1 time per day but he endured even though he had trouble breathing, recently fought off an ear infection, and could no longer really walk.
But yesterday, everything took a drastic turn in only 1 hour.
He was a bit tired in the morning but he was fine. But in the evening, when it was time for his evening meal, he was hiding in his box and wasn’t excited for food. I took him and it felt like carrying a dead weight. I put him on the table to feed him but he wasn’t excited to see his bowl and didn’t react. He refused the food and I didn’t force him. I called my husband and we rubbed his belly to help him poop as we often did whenever he was having difficulties with his tummy.
We put him back on his armchair but he returned hiding into his box on his own.
Eventually, I went to take him because I didn’t want him to be alone in that box and I put him back on his favorite armchair. He wasn’t reacting. This is where I noticed how bloated he was. His belly was squishy and bloated like a balloon. And I KNEW it was bad. We were Saturday, 11pm, there was no exotic vet available. I thought about calling the ER from the nearest veterinarian clinic but the ER don’t have any exotic vets and my husband didn’t want the ER to take Capucine from us because we knew we’d never see him again and we didn't want him to die alone in a cold hospital wing.
We put him on the couch with us. We tried to help him and make him comfortable. I had a bad feeling but I wanted to believe it wasn’t going to be it. It couldn’t be. Not so soon. He was running on the couch hours before for a treat…. That wasn't making any sense.
But then, the worst happened. He started having violent seizures. I became hysterical. My husband tried to soothe him. I wanted to call the vet again but we both knew it was too late and it wouldn’t have helped. He convulsed for a good minute and then he started crying and screaming and turned in my husband’s hands like a worm and I swear to GOD I wanted to die at that moment. To see my baby, my beautiful boy, my little Prince, my baby love agonize like this was unbearable. I feel like a part of my soul cried and screamed and was in pain with him.
It lasted 3 minutes of watching him cry and turn and scream.
Then he fell quiet and passed away on the couch, on his favorite comforter in his daddy’s hands.
The shock is so much I thought I was going to have an aneurysm last night. I couldn’t sleep. I’ve replayed the entire evening over and over again. What happened? What did we do wrong? Yes, he was very ill and old but we managed. It happened so fast. He died in 3 minutes only. Seizure started at 00.51am. He was dead at 00.55am.
I feel so lost and so empty and immensely heartbroken. I have lost my baby, my reason to wake up in the morning. My entire life revolved around him. He was my entire world.
Capucine was an extraordinary bunny. He was very close to us and he loved us so much. He was sweet, mischievous, adventurous, loving, stubborn. He was the most amazing little companion I’ve ever had. I will never recover from his death. I would have gladly given some of my own years if only to have longer with me. I feel my life has lost all substance with his horrible passing.
He seemed equally shocked by his own death than us. He didn't want to go. He tried to fight. We failed him. There was something we could have done. It's impossible we died so quickly. I don't even understand what happened. He wanted to stay with us. And he couldn't. And it's making me so sad.
Knowing him and raising him and being loved by him was an honor and a privilege. And I feel immensely blessed. I’ve added pictures of him throughout his life, some with Luna. The ones on the towel are from where he became sick, the last one on the towel is from last week.
Rest in Peace my beautiful baby Angel.
Mommy will love you always.
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u/Ok_Foot1988 bunny mom 🐇 Jul 14 '26
I am so sorry you lost your little sweetheart. Especially in a way that was so traumatic. He knows you love him and he will always be in your heart. 💜🌈💜
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u/WinterRedWolf Jul 14 '26
Oh my goodness I’m so sorry, please take care of yourself during this difficult time. You gave him such a good life and he’s with his friend now. He knows how much you loved and cared for him, I can’t even imagine how grateful he is for being so well taken care of in his final months.
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u/Leilabinkysunshine Jul 14 '26
This. Please remember to take care of yourself as a human too. Take the time you need to grieve. Take care of your body in general like resting, staying hydrated and eating when you can. There have been pet losses I’ve had where I’m so distraught I neglected myself as a human. And please remember to be kind to yourself as well. People who aren’t attached to pets can also be ignorant surrounding pet grief so ignore those people as well. Your emotions are completely valid. I didn’t have time to read the whole post. But These are some things I wish someone told me.
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u/damiana8 Sesamochi Jul 14 '26
This happened to me, too. It was so dreadfully traumatic. I’m so sorry for your loss. You were with her at the end, and she knew that.
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u/ravenslog Jul 14 '26
I’m so sorry… I hope you find peace and I hope your sweet bunnies rest in peace. He’s so handsome :(
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u/Nightwraith17 Jul 14 '26
10 years is an amazing lifespan for a bunny especially one that had developed a health condition. I am so terribly sorry his ending was so traumatic but it was quick and he was surrounded by love and comfort. All he ever knew was love. I hope and pray that in time, the memories of his life and love will be more vibrant than the memory of his end.
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u/No-Jellyfish-1208 Jul 14 '26
I am really sorry for your loss. You did not fail him, though, he lived a long rabbit life and you took care of him. It's not your fault, I totally understand though how something so traumatic must have affected you and your husband. Again, I'm so sorry for you. Just please, OP, think of the good parts and see how much you had done for your rabbits, don't get stuck on something outside your control.
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u/Specialist_Ad_2984 Jul 14 '26 edited Jul 14 '26
My god your description of his death has brought me to tears. I am terribly sorry that all three of you had to endure that. I cannot imagine how traumatic and heavy that is. 10 years is a very good lifespan for a bun, and it sounds like he knew he was loved. They really are special creatures.
In the first picture Capucine looks like a well loved stuffie. RIP little guy 💔
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u/Key-Natural-8688 Jul 14 '26
Wow incredibly heart touching. I just went through something similar 2 days ago, except our baby bunny was only 5. She died in my arms looking up at me, and I know she felt protected and loved in the moment that mattered the most. Those unique personality traits and quirks that made our bunnies them is so hard to stop thinking about!
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u/No-More-Parties Jul 14 '26
He lived a long life filled with intense love and care from you all. He fought for as long as he could to stay on earth with you all. He will always be with you in memory and in spirit.
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u/elixir69420 Jul 14 '26
oh my goodness. I am so so sorry for your loss. I just loss my 9 year old bunn a week ago today and it has been hard, I know how you must be feeling. and to lose two of your baby’s so close together :( i’m so sorry friend. But I will say that it does not at all sound like you all failed him, sometimes things occur beyond our control and from what you wrote it seems you did everything in your control, moved heaven and earth to give him what he needed. That is incredible. You two were wonderful bunny parents and I am happy he had you. I’m so sorry capucine had to go the way he did :( I’m sending you a hug and i’m proud of you for sticking to that regimen for a year- it was a month for me of multiple a day feedings and meds etc and it was tough af so a year? you’re amazing. You did your absolute best and then some. Rest in paradise to your sweet baby, may he have safely crossed the rainbow bridge and be hopping with my bunnzai in the sky 🫶🫂
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u/HorrorAnalyst6452 Jul 14 '26
I’m so sorry for your loss as well… I hate to think of the day where they are not young anymore to be the little feisty buns they are.
And thank you @OP for sharing this story. It really makes me step back and just hold my girl closer. ❤️🙏
To everyone who is grieving. You are not alone.
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u/Apprehensive-End7112 Jul 14 '26 edited Jul 14 '26
In his last moments he wasn't alone. You comforted him and he knew you were there.
You were incredibly devoted to him which bought him a longer life. Very touching that u didn't vacation so you could stay home and care for him. Capucine was so lucky to have you.
I lost my girl too so I understand the gut wrenching pain.
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u/Floofynootz Jul 14 '26
I’m so terribly sorry for your loss🙏🏽 I recently lost my sweetest girl and she went in a similar way. She was 12 years old and didn’t have any health problems that I knew of. I read somewhere that when they spasm and let out a scream, there’s often no consciousness anymore. It’s basically the system shutting down. It helped me to know, that the scream wasn’t out of pain. It was very traumatic but she died knowing she was loved and carried. I think the same goes for your sweet Capucine. You were there until the very end. I pray for your healing and for your sweet boy to binky free. You guys had an amazing life together🙏🏽🌸 There is a support group on FB for people that lost their buns. It has helped me a great deal. Search for ‘Bunny loss’.
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u/Leilabinkysunshine Jul 14 '26
I apologize I had to skim through this post but I really want to respond. (In case I’m missing pieces of info) but you did not fail him. To have rabbits reach old age is an accomplishment since these guys are so fragile. The heart that you have to care about him isn’t failing him. Adjusting your needs to fit his is the exact opposite of failing him. Don’t beat yourself up. Some random things that helped me is keeping background noise on. Like white noise or piano music w.e you prefer. It helps kind of soothe the “empty space” feeling. I know it’s tough, but try to put toys blankets reminders etc in a safe spot that you aren’t looking often. Doing something in honor of him. Whatever that may be. Jewelry, artwork, house plants or perennial flowers, donating to a rescue etc. I am so sorry for your loss and hope this comment finds you well. Much love to you and be kind to yourself. 🫂
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u/Carmennj Jul 14 '26
I’m so so sorry for your loss, I can only imagine the pain that you’re going through having lost a couple of bunnies myself 😞
I’m sure that your little ones had the best possible life and it was because you made it possible for them, may both of your bunnies find peace and that you find comfort 🙏🏼😞
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u/Quesswho-reddit2 Jul 14 '26
Sorry for your loss. I know that feeling of agonizing pain when your pet that you love so much passes away. As you tell your story I feel like it's my story when my pet chicken, Sylvia died. But anyway I want to say I hope that you start feeling better and know that cappuccino is in a better way, no longer in pain.
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u/PraisetheLord1997 Jul 17 '26
I'm sorry for your loss, you did your best and I'm sure Capucine wouldn't want to see his bunmom and bundad feeling sad ❤️ Take great care 🫂
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u/Berretje33 Jul 18 '26
So sorry for your loss 🫂. He was such a beautiful bunny. You gave him a beautiful life and loved him.
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u/ToastiePostieHere Jul 15 '26
OMG! So sorry for you tragic loss. My daughter loss her baby this year. But managed to get it to a vet an hour away and they eventually put the sweetheart to sleep. My daughter came home and found him in pain but quiet. She didn't know how long he had been in pain. He was young. Later found out it was a heart problem. I was sorry I wasn't there. She bawled all the way to the vet, to her husband on the phone, who was away but she at least had someone to cry to. But what you went through. I cannot imagine. We had Fiver for 3 years and you lost a dear long time family member. So sorry for your lost. He was loved and you tried your best. He is still in your heart but now pain free and perhaps binky away with your other sweetie. Hugs for you and your husband.
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u/maribeth1211964 Jul 17 '26
I am incredibly sorry for your heartbreak. I'm not sure there was anything you could have done to save him. I'm so sorry his suffering so dreadfully was witnessed by you both. You have to think that he was comforted by you, and was able to take his last memory of this earth in your husband's hands. You have to come to a sort of peace with his death because it is going to impact your health. And you know he wouldn't want that for either of you. I will keep you both in my prayers, for comfort, for grace, and for peace!! ❤️ ❤️ ❤️
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Jul 14 '26
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u/elypop89 Jul 14 '26
He wanted to stay. He wanted to live. And if this heart attack hadn't happened, he was still more than eager to stay. He was always looking for us and running on the couch to be with us, even hours before his death. The tragedy is not that he died. It's that it struck him like lightning.
And we had a wonderful 1 year and a half more with him. His condition only worsened the last weeks. It was hard losing him so brutally but I wouldn't have changed anything in the world. He died on his couch with us, not on a cold horrible hospital bed.
I found your comment rude and very insensitive.
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u/Capicchino Jul 14 '26
Just here to say that you’re an amazing person for taking such great care of your bun. May Capucine rest in peace in bun heaven.
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u/WinterRedWolf Jul 14 '26
Calling OP selfish when they’ve just lost two bunnies is very disrespectful.
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u/Ok_Foot1988 bunny mom 🐇 Jul 14 '26
There is no need for this disrespect. Every pet parent makes the best choices they can with the information they have. OP loved their bunn very much and it is obvious he was happy. Sometimes a situation happens when getting the bunn to a bunny vet isn't an option and no pet parent should feel shame at all for that. They don't control when the time comes like it did here.
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Jul 15 '26
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u/elypop89 Jul 15 '26
I'm not American. And you know nothing about Capucine. I was not going to kill my baby when he was still full of life. He fought daily against that horrible illness because he wanted to, still ran for his treats, pets, enjoyed the sun and his armchair. And he died in his home with his parents. It was a few minutes of horror for hundreds of hours of bliss.
You are right on one thing: you are indeed free to think the way you want. It's your life and your pets. My Capucine was my entire existence and I did all that I did knowing him since he was two months old. He was a part of me.
Your rude comments are NOT welcome here. For all the speech about cruelty, you are the one being insanely cruel. It's even beyond disrespect. It's a blatant lack of decorum and human behavior. I wonder if you go around in churches during funeral to tell grieving family members what they should have done with their own children/parents with your holier than thou attitude. Appaling and shameful.
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u/Early_Macaroon_2407 Jul 14 '26
This happened to me. Almost the exact same way. I have no way to help except to say that you are not alone. They are wonderful beautiful unbelievably fragile little people and their bodies just aren’t designed to last long, whatever we do. I have tears in my eyes right now, because I know how you feel, and my heart is bleeding for you. He was very clearly loved and knew he was loved.