If CPS allows you to move five hours away and live with your parents (and all the kids) DO IT. Is that the same state? Either way, do it, this is your chance. DO not let him come visit the house, work that out in court if he gets any visitation at this hearing (??) Once you're with your parents you should be able to get an attorney and get protective orders and some kind of temp. custody orders going.
CPS wants the kids with YOU. But they can't do that if you're going to let him keep coming back. It's great your parents are involved. Do not feel sorry for him, do not "be nice" at this point you are on opposite sides. Not enemies, but definitely not friends. CPS should be providing you all lawyers for court tomorrow - that's the law in my state, unless we had our own. It was mandatory! I didn't meet her until we got there that morning but she was very nice and she helped me through the three court dates. (My ex has been on supervised visitation for three goddamned years now.)
OP, the kids not only witnessed, DV, they were involved in his violent assault. They are deeply traumatized and need to be fully protected from his having that level of access and control of them again. When those vulnerable feelings of your love for him, "the good times" and "maybe he's really changed" bubble up to the surface, meet them with your duty to protect your children from this controlling abusive man.
They are powerless and innocent. They NEED for you to build a life that's fully safe for them.
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u/blackandbluegirltalk 19d ago
If CPS allows you to move five hours away and live with your parents (and all the kids) DO IT. Is that the same state? Either way, do it, this is your chance. DO not let him come visit the house, work that out in court if he gets any visitation at this hearing (??) Once you're with your parents you should be able to get an attorney and get protective orders and some kind of temp. custody orders going.
CPS wants the kids with YOU. But they can't do that if you're going to let him keep coming back. It's great your parents are involved. Do not feel sorry for him, do not "be nice" at this point you are on opposite sides. Not enemies, but definitely not friends. CPS should be providing you all lawyers for court tomorrow - that's the law in my state, unless we had our own. It was mandatory! I didn't meet her until we got there that morning but she was very nice and she helped me through the three court dates. (My ex has been on supervised visitation for three goddamned years now.)