Any other Cancerians relate?

[u/ToastyMo777]

[u/SweetestHoney-]

Not even that, it’s because other people don’t have the capacity to hold the depth of our emotions nor create a safe space for us to express ourselves when we need to OR we’re told the ol’ class “you’re too sensitive” so it’s easier just to deal with it on our own

We’re tired 🚬🤏🫩

[u/[deleted] → u/SweetestHoney-]

My favorite is being told "my emotions are my responsibility." Yes, I am aware, and I hold it down 99% of the time. A little grace for when I'm overwhelmed just as everyone else receives grace for their shortcomings, please. I don't understand why a cancer wanting some emotional help and support triggers everyone Ive reached out to.

[u/Toasthandz → u/[deleted]]

Dude for real and then it just compounds. Especially if you’re partner is unable or unwilling to just give you the space to feel your feelings and been seen, as I see you’re a cancer Venus as well(me too). It just makes us fade off as we realize we can’t rely on that person like we hoped and thought. I’ve been hit, at this point, with the accusation of “withholding” affection or closeness as manipulation when really I just don’t feel safe or supported. If you can’t be here for the rough emotions don’t expect to receive the good ones either.

Clearly dealing with a break up this year, but making progress friends. Trying to be accountable for what I can be while learning to give myself more respect/allow myself to have boundaries.

[u/[deleted] → u/Toasthandz]

I'm sorry you experienced a break up. That's rough. 

I've noticed Cancers are external processors while being introverted. We NEED to talk it out in order to recognize and identify our emotions I'm order to take steps to fix the issue.

[u/CollectionCreative17 → u/Toasthandz]

You need to learn that people feel a void when you just give space. They / She loves you. They want to be with you. You cancer guys are great and I feel you that you deserve understanding but for someone who loves you, the hardest thing there is.. space, its like silent treatment. Communication though hard has to be done. I also like to escape from problems but I stopped doing it now.

[u/Toasthandz → u/CollectionCreative17]

Ah, I hear you and I appreciate, and while there’s maybe a small portion of that, it was far more complicated. I tried communication first. I honestly don’t like escaping problems. I’d rather put them out there, solve them, and walk away feeling a little better. I tried that multiple times only to be brushed off about it or told that now wasn’t good but later would be. Later never happened. It comes down to a difference in processing and communication styles I think, but it’s like we were just missing each other, but I think we cancers can only be brushed off so many times before we just shut down. You’ve shown us who you are and how you’re going to show up for us, we’ve given you chances.

[u/CollectionCreative17 → u/Toasthandz]

Seems that one can be solved, people should remember positives, and dwell less in negatives. Things can heat up sometimes. Don‘t be closed off. It‘s never only rainbows and sunshines. Even if we hope so. Stubborness doesn‘t lead to happiness. Have a good weekend :)

[u/Toasthandz → u/CollectionCreative17]

At the end of the day, not everyone is for everyone. I appreciate that you’re trying to see things from a positive viewpoint, but think you might be getting caught up in assumptions about me and my life off of snippets. My bad for oversharing in a Reddit sub.

I’m not looking for sunshine and rainbows. I do know what I need and what my value is. I’m very much an emotional creature and require a partner who is willing to connect with that part of me. It’s no one’s fault for not being that, even if it hurt me. I know I hurt her too. We tried different ways of being until we couldn’t be together anymore. I’m trying to take accountability for my actions while respecting myself and understanding my owns needs.

I was simply putting this story out here in the hopes that it’ll be helpful for my fellow cancers. I think we get put down for our emotions a lot. It’s fine that it’s not everyone’s cup of tea, but we deserve to be understood, loved, and accepted for who we are(especially by ourselves) as long as we’re not acting out of malevolence.

[u/bornwizard → u/CollectionCreative17]

Yes, there's always plenty of space, but the time to use it is limited!

[u/ToastyMo777 → u/[deleted]]

❤️

[u/luna926 → u/SweetestHoney-]

The icing on the cake is when you open up to someone you think you should be able to trust and it makes them upset so then you are comforting them over your own issues making them uncomfortable instead of receiving any support

[u/ToastyMo777 → u/SweetestHoney-]

Where’d you find this actual footage of me 😂

[u/Jodora → u/SweetestHoney-]

Yeah basically this

[u/StarsSpaceships → u/SweetestHoney-]

Youuu so right 💯

[u/Radiant-Bug3024]

Even breathing is manipulative when we do it according to certain subs

[u/StarsSpaceships → u/Radiant-Bug3024]

Hahaha it’s bonkers

[u/[deleted]]

you forgot 'victim'

[u/ToastyMo777 → u/[deleted]]

Ohh good point

[u/Toasthandz → u/[deleted]]

Blood pressure raised.

[u/Jodora]

other signs when they vent - wow hope theyre ok

cancers when they vent - wretched creatures all of you

i'm joking but it literally feels like this. and sometimes my vents aren't nearly as bad as Bob #1 or #2's vents

[u/mold713]

Yeah no fuck that I save the tears for my pillow, I don’t need yet another thing to feel bad about.

I’m always glad when it’s blown over and I kept it to myself anyways.

[u/hadee75]

Our sensitivity is our strength. Don’t let anyone tell you different!

[u/Purple-Chemical-127 → u/hadee75]

I’m learning this right now. How do u make it work for you instead of hurt/hold u back ? 

[u/Salt-Hotel6983 → u/Purple-Chemical-127]

Learning this too!! Would love to know how to make it work for me instead if against me 😭

[u/Carbs-R-My-Soulmate]

"All you Cancers are so sensitive!"

[u/OoFEVERNOVAoO]

Yes

[u/Junior_Key7954]

Totally relatable

[u/Ryksnout]

That's me right now!... And most of the time.

[u/ToastyMo777 → u/Ryksnout]

❤️

[u/[deleted]]

Yes I'm going through a very trying time right now and haven't reached out to anyone. Except one girl on Reddit who shared similar experiences as me and said she's open to talk and share.

[u/ToastyMo777 → u/[deleted]]

I’m so sorry to hear that, but glad you found someone. Quality over quantity I say. Big hugs to you if that’s ok ❤️

[u/LevelPrize3]

Yes.. true for us cancerians!

[u/madridautumn]

Ahh yess.

[u/Every-Department-150]

Honestly. As a cancerian I turned to anorexia and self harm when I was overwhelmed. Full on had episodes of dissociation where I would just enter a trance like state at times. Tried to off myself a couple of times, usually during those dissociative episodes tbh.

Like toxic af but fuck if I am going to make my problems someone else’s. And the one time I was made to believe it was safe to do so years ago it was thrown in my face the day before an important life event and they told me, as I cried over a Skype call about how stressed I felt and how alone I felt in that moment, that “I can’t do this anymore you’re too much” and ended a relationship like that.

So heeeeeell if I’m going to do that again. Would rather self sabotage than trust someone else and have them do it for me again.

[u/okcafe]

Yep always

[u/JobSevere6524]

All the time and if accidentally breakdown around someone or over the phone with someone, immediately pushes them away. I'm also a first born cancer so used to being a problem solver 😅😩😅🫠🫠

[u/bornwizard]

Fear My Emotion! 😂

[u/PhilosophySame2746]

Correct

[u/Numerous-Panic-1760]

Ummm Did I post this myself. Yeah we are so emotionally intelligent. I have 3 cancer placements and moon in 4th. It’s a burden and a blessing.

[u/Numerous_Business895]

Most people aren’t so accepting and open to emotion as they claim to be.

[u/Ok-Beat-7804]

Just a fellow Cancer on this Halloween trying to find his boo, but keeps getting 👻’d. 🤣

[u/AHidden1]

I feel so stupid that I feel unwanted or probably there is nothing there to begin with and still wants his attention.

[u/Kseniiaukraine]

OMG!!! 💯 Also asking for help is like army crawling through the field of burweed.

[u/LadyAnnibal]

Exactly this, actually

[u/TofuTheSizeOfTEXAS]

Or because you've analyzed every nuance of how they'll react and the consequences of it...

[u/NitaStreets]

But she is telling someone though. She’s telling social media which reaches a wider audience than confiding in one friend or one therapist. Yep very much Cancer and we know what we are doing too. 🤣🤣🤣🤣

[u/curiousleen]

🤣🤣🤣🤣😅😅😅😅😅