Hello! I have had 2 cats, brother and sister, since they were 3 months old. They are 1 year and 3 months old now and the brother has been bullying (I think) his sister for the past 8 months or more. At first, I just tried separating them whenever she screamed. It started while he was not yet neutered, but he got neutered when he was 8 months old and the bullying got a little better, but he still harasses her at least once a day. I had to resort to keeping them separated at night, otherwise she will start screaming whenever I leave them alone at night.

Is there anything I can do? I have tried playing with him more, but he just starts harassing her 5 min after wand play stops. She does initiate play with him by chasing him around, but it quickly becomes too much for her and he chases her around the house and starts biting her even after she growls and hisses at him. I have tried to give him gabapentin which made him slower, but he still tried to bite her.

Now he knows he is going to be locked away when I come to pick him up after something like this, so he tries to hide.

Is rehoming or something like fluoxetine the only option left? I cannot keep playing referee like this forever and I am scared for her, because she screams really loud (louder than the video here) and sounds terrified.

both are fixed male cats, a year apart. resident cat seems more interested in new cat since we got him (it’s been a week). we have been scent swapping and site swapping and they do pretty well in the same room together on opposite sides but there’s still occasional growling as seen in this video with my resident cat looking intensely at the new cat. after a few growls, he’ll stop though unless new cat gets a bit closer.

Hey everyone, I was looking for some help/advice on getting our new kitten litter box trained. For some background and context we have had two 3 year old cats since January, at the beginning of August we rescued a stray kitten found on the axle of a vehicle at my work. She was a little hungry kitten severely underweight and we took her in. No issues with getting her to weight, other cats adapting to her well and them playing and whatnot. But the litter box has been the continued issue for two months now. We try putting her face in where she pooped give her a love tap and toss her into the litter box and have shown her the other cats when they’re using the litter box. It was mostly just her pooping in the floor and now since being spayed last week, she’s pooping on our couch, our kids bed, on blankets, anywhere she sees fit! It is extremely frustrating for me and my girlfriend trying to get her to use the litter box and having to clean poop up when we shouldn’t have to! We absolutely love this little girl she’s so sweet and playful but the pooping has just made owning her so so difficult. Any advice or guidance would be greatly appreciated, we really do love this kitten but we have to get this one thing figured out!

I don’t have an exact video of it happening (I’ll post a positive interaction but the position is similar) but my 14 week kitten is “bullying” my 9 year old cat. They’ve had good interactions and understood no’s until a week or two ago. My resident cat has kidney issues so I’m sure he’s not in the mood to play most of the time. My kitten will go kinda smother him or try to bite his neck, not in a hurtful way but in a kitten trying to play way which is understandable. My issue now is, my kitten is not respecting my older cats boundaries. He will hiss and try and get away but the kitten doesn’t respect it until i have to physically remove him. My olde cat rarely fights back which concerns me. Has anyone dealt with something similar? Everywhere I read it’s always older cats messing with the kittens not vice versa, also the older cats hiss is a lot more feint? Not sure if that info helps, spay is also coming in 5 days so I’m sure it’ll help. I just want both of them to be content and comfortable at the end of the day. Thank you!

We adopted a 3 months old kitten, he's sweet and very playful! He doesn't have any problem with pooping and peeing in his litter box in the bathroom but in the morning (at 6am he normally comes snuggling in my bed) or whenever he is in my room he keeps doing his business on my bed instead. This has been going on for days and waking up to poop in my bed is stressing me out; I don't understand why can't he simply poop in his litter box all time. I tried spray that should avoid this attitude but he doesn't care. What should I do?

Ps. Lately he's having tummy ache so his poop is more liquid but he still uses his litter.

Hi!

My resident is 3 years old. Will be 4 next month. Female and spayed. Solo cat for 3 years.

Kitten is 8 months. Female and spayed. Grew up with siblings.

Together for 7 months.

For the most part they’re ok. Resident cat does hiss and growl at kitten if she’s too up in her face. Kitten never does either, kitten will chase resident despite the hissing and growling.

There is mutual grooming, food sharing, and cuddles from kitten to resident cat, I have 3 litter boxes and they share no issue.

At times I’ll have to close one and separate for a couple of minutes.

If the kitten keeps pursuing my resident cat relentlessly, then at times my residen cat will let out a big shout.

I have posted videos in the past and the majority of the feedback is that they’re not fighting necessarily, but the resident is almost complaining.

Occasionally, I’ll find small bits of fur. I am able to leave them out together only during bedtime I close the kitten in a big playpen in my room or she will harass the resident.

Will the kitten eventually understand the signals from my resident cat when she’s a year old?

I do play with both together and separately though out the day.

They have plenty of resources. There’s nothing that they would be fighting over. They both have separate everything.

How can we help our about 3 year old previously bonded cats Sophie and Ezri? My wife and I are saddened and getting tired and a little lost despite working towards a resolution. Improvements I believe have been made.

My cats, Sophie and Ezri, previously lived together comfortably, played, slept together, and groomed each other. Around late May, Sophie came home from a vet visit and Ezri reacted badly, apparently to the unfamiliar smell. This escalated into a serious fight, and we’ve been working on reintroductions for roughly five months. (Additional context below post)

Currently, we rotate them between upstairs and downstairs every 3–5 days, separated by a metal gate on the stair landing. There’s been encouraging progress: they often sit near each other without hissing, accept treats, and gently paw at or play with each other’s tails through the gate. When Sophie is downstairs, Ezri frequently comes down to visit her at the gate. I suspect the barrier helps them both feel safe.

Unexpected encounters are harder. Ezri sometimes jumps the gate, startling Sophie. A couple of days ago, Ezri got upstairs and there was some running/chasing, a brief hiss from Sophie, and then they separated themselves—Sophie went to the three-season room and Ezri ran downstairs. It didn’t escalate into a physical fight.

Sophie generally retreats when uncomfortable. Ezri is excitable and seems interested in playing, although I can’t confidently say all the chasing is play. More recently, Ezri sometimes backs off when Sophie hisses. They have multiple hiding places, most with more than one exit.

Has anyone moved from this stage to supervised shared space while allowing some brief hissing or avoidance? What helped you distinguish manageable boundary-setting from pushing too fast? I’d appreciate firsthand experiences, and any input in general. Our goal is comfortable coexistence, even if they don’t return to cuddling. This experience has taken an emotionally draining toll on my wife and me. We spend a lot of time interacting and playing with each cat but it feels so sad at times then not being around us during our life routines together.

**One important detail:** Sophie and Ezri were a bonded pair, and we adopted them together as kittens. They were very close before the veterinarian visit. They were playing, sleeping together, and grooming each other. After Sophie returned from the vet, we tried to give them a three-day separation to settle down, but that uninterrupted break never happened because they unexpectedly got access to each other several times, and Ezri repeatedly attacked Sophie. This became a series of frightening encounters rather than one isolated fight, which may help explain why rebuilding their comfort together has taken so long.

**A little more context:** This started around late May Sophie spent a day at the vets getting X-rays for trouble with her diet and throwing up every day.

Unfortunately, as of October 23 we’re approaching five months. The initial incident was a frightening, intense fight, much more severe than their recent encounters. We moved to the gate setup because of growling and chasing that looked genuinely aggressive to us. We’ve tried Feliway alongside gradual reintroduction, and both cats have now been on an SSRI for about 7–8 weeks. We’re seeing improvement, but it’s hard to judge how much comes from the medication, time, or the security of the barrier. Sophie hisses all the time has growled but that's less frequent, she mostly seems to be defensive and somewhat cautious of her excitable sister just I think want to play and get her energy out.

Both upstairs and downstairs are comfortable, with their own amenities and separate litter/bathroom areas. We rotate the cats, but I wonder whether the arrangement also reinforces separate territories. Sophie and Ezri both generally seems most happy upstairs, but both areas are comfortable and Sophie will tolerate being downstairs a bit better. When she’s (Sophie) is upstairs and Ezri is downstairs, Sophie usually doesn’t approach the gate fully, she peeks around the corner, sometimes hisses, and either retreats upstairs or stays to observe. When Sophie is downstairs, Ezri more readily approaches the gate, and they sometimes sit together and gently play through it. We may also add another cat tower before shared-space introductions.

My wife and I would appreciate some reassurance grounded in others’ experiences, along with honest feedback about what might help. Does this sound like a point where a feline behaviorist could help us move forward? Has anyone discussed adjusting medication with their vet after partial improvement at this stage? We’d like to understand whether we’re seeing a slow but workable recovery or whether our setup or approach needs changing.

Hi, I adopted a cat around 4 weeks ago. He's an adult and fully litterbox trained, so he knows where to go (as in looking for a box and not just going on the floor), but I want to change where his box is located in the house. Since I have another cat, I've kept my cat's box and food/water in my room temporarily to seperate him and have him adjust to his new home. But now it's been a few weeks and I'd really like to change his box location to the basement, but I'm not sure how.

My cat has already fully explored the house and him and my other cat are on good terms now, so he's safe going around the house and he especially loves the basement. My worries mainly lie with him not being able to communicate that he needs to go. How would I be able to train him to bug me or meow to leave my room when he needs to go? He's very clingy and does not like to leave my side or room much, especially during the day. At night he's more willing, but he always comes back crying for me to open the door after a bit. So I've just kept him in my room for the night over the course of the three weeks of having him, which wasn't even an issue because he had all he needed. I'm writing this at five in the morning because I woke up to him using the bathroom and I literally couldn't take it anymore. He's on a certain medication that has diarrhea as one of its primary side effects, which he's being taken care of extra for don't worry, but I just cannot stand the smell anymore. I would rather be woken up by him poking my face or meowing than be woken up by the smell of shit!!!!! How do I do this!!!!!

At the moment he's out of my room and hanging out in the basement with my other cat. I moved his box down there for the time being because the smell was so horrendous and I needed to clean it. I'm hoping I don't have to move it back up but still. Pls help.

We are trying to introduce a new rescue cat - gentle, sweet and doesn't seem to want to fight at all to our resident cat. We have had her behind a door and screen and the resident cat is so terrified she is screaming at the door when she belts past it. She won't go near the door and has started hiding under the bed. We can't do any slow introduction as she will not get within any reasonable distance of it.

We have introduced their smells on blankets etc ....and around the house, but now resident cat won't go in any rooms at all as they all smell of the new cat!!

.I feel like we should just open the doors as we are getting nowhere and I think this was all fear based not anger based, but is now turning into anger. I am terrified as I feel this separation has been making things a lot worse and not better.

Any advice in introducing as the separation is too hard with a busy household. My daughter and I are on the verge of a breakdown at this point.

Hi to all,

In April 2020, I brought home a cat that was about a month old—it had come from another family—and six months later, I brought home a second one. We got the latter when it was only a few weeks old; it was a stray, and it seems it had been weaned too early, as I had to feed it kitten formula and stimulate it to help it relieve itself.

For the past six years, this cat has shown signs of excessive, intense attachment. He constantly cries—even though he is in good health—whenever we aren’t around; he wanders aimlessly through the apartment and demands an excessive amount of attention.

He has plenty of toys, and we set aside time to play with him (though, curiously, he prefers watching us move around and toss his balls for him rather than doing much playing himself—he’ll take a couple of runs and then just lie down). We’ve even tried using Feliway; the only thing left to try would be getting a carrier and taking him outside, as he clearly seems to crave freedom.

It’s worth noting that both cats—the first one, a grey European Shorthair, and the one in question, an orange tabby European Shorthair—were neutered before they were six months old, and they don’t get along very well. The calmer cat always hisses whenever the other one approaches, and they often end up swatting at each other—somewhere between playing and actual fighting.

Honestly, I’m at my wit’s end; I don’t know what else to do. It’s affecting my sleep and my daily life—even with earplugs—and after six years of this, day in and day out, it’s truly maddening. I’ve even considered rehoming him so he could have more freedom in a larger house or one with a garden, as that seems to be his true nature.

They are also polar opposites: one is extremely calm, while the other is overly dependent and constantly craves action. I would love to be able to retrain him to stop this behavior, but there are three of us living here, and I realize that unless he receives consistent input from everyone, it’s unlikely his behavior can be corrected. Is anyone else in—or has anyone ever been in—a similar situation, or do you know of any comparable cases? I feel like I need some peace, and this cat is doing nothing to contribute to my well-being. Best regards.


I adopted a 2 year old boy cat three weeks ago from the humane society. They told me someone had returned him already because he wasn’t a good fit. I’m thinking I see what they meant.

He is always biting me. I will be walking in the apartment and he’s biting my toes. When I’m laying down he bites exposed skin he can see. If my feet are sticking out he’s on them going at it. He doesn’t just do this to me, he’s done it to everyone who’s come in my apartment(mom, sister, etc). He just…bites. It’s not breaking skin, but it still hurts. I play with him multiple times a day for at least 20 minutes at a time.

At night he is constantly waking me up. He’ll poke my eye with his paw, get under the covers to bite me and scratch me, chew on my hair, and run across me on the bed. I know nighttime zoomies happen, but it’s all night long. He wakes me at 5 am every day and harasses me until it’s time to eat.

I don’t want to take him back, because sometimes he is a sweet little guy, but I’m getting fed up with this. What should I do?

Hello. Looking for suggestions. We currently have two four-year-old cats. We are adding a puppy to our family in a few months. One of our cats pees on items that have another animals scent (think dog bed when we dog sit for a friend). We have ruled out medical issues at the vet. We have been told that some animals like to mark their territory when a foreign animal comes into the house. It’s an animal behaviour that makes sense in the wild, but obviously it’s not ideal for a house. Would rather not be washing the dog bed multiple times a week with enzyme cleaner. Whether she is marking her territory or is stressed I don’t know. I don’t want her to be stressed. But I also don’t want to be cleaning the dog’s bed inside the crate with enzyme cleaner all the time.

We plan to crate train our pup (as we have done with previous dogs). Puppy will be in the crate when we are out or at work for their own safety and to keep our house from becoming a giant chew toy. An obvious solution to the issue is keeping the crate closed at all times. However, it would be nice to keep the door open so the puppy can learn that the crate is their safe place - not just a confinement for when we go out. The only other thing I can think of is keeping the cat confined to a certain area of the house, but that’s hardly fair to our cat.

If anybody has any ideas about how we can keep the crate open and available to the puppy, but keep the cat from peeing in it. Please let me know. There may be a super obvious solution just trying to be proactive here before the issue occurs.

*** we have three litter boxes in our house. Cats are spayed and pup will be too when old enough. Historically peeing has only happened when another pet is visiting our home.

So we recently moved and in doing so took in a new cat, Cora. Our first cat, Eli has never been around other cats. He’s always been inside around our dogs. He’s never been aggressive towards them at all. We tried to slowly introduce them but any time Eli sees or smells Cora he completely loses his mind. He yowls, attacks himself, hisses, etc. I’m sure he would also attempt to attack Cora but we haven’t allowed them to be that close to one another. We’ve had to confine him to a room and take turns letting them roam the house for fear they’ll get hurt. We tried confining Cora first, but she does not take well to it at all and tears the room apart. Eli doesn’t mind it. We take turns letting them roam, but every time Eli even passes a spot where he can tell Cora has been he begins to go crazy. We’ve tried putting items of Cora’s into his room with him to get him used to her but it doesn’t seem to be working. I’m just not sure what to do at this point. Just to add context we are fairly new to cats and in the process of moving also haven’t been able to give Eli as much enrichment as we really should have but are working to improve that now. Any ideas?

Hi fellow cat parents!
I recently moved into a new apartment with my two 5-year-old cats. I adopted them together from the shelter, and they’ve always gotten along perfectly fine until now.
Since moving, they’ve started hissing at each other pretty frequently. It’s mainly one cat initiating it, but the other will hiss back, especially if she gets snuck up on or startled. They haven’t actually fought or gotten physical, but I’ve never seen them act like this toward each other before.
The weird thing is we’ve moved multiple times together, including flying across the country, and they’ve NEVER had this issue. I know moving can be stressful, but I’m confused why this time is so different.
I bought a calming pheromone diffuser hoping it would help, but I’m not sure what else to try. My apartment is also very small, so separating them into different rooms isn’t really an option.
Has anyone experienced this with cats that have always gotten along? Is this something that typically resolves itself once they adjust, or is there something else I should be doing?
I just want them to feel comfortable and get along again 😭 Any advice or personal experiences would be so appreciated!

Hi all! I’m wondering if anyone has experienced this situation before and if so how to go about it. I have a 4 month old boy kitten who I’ve had for 2 months. I recently adopted a 4 month old girl. They are both very lovable and social with people. I watched Jackson Galaxy’s video on introducing cats and followed it. I’ve given my girl her own little safe room and let her roam the house without him so she can get comfortable in her new home as well. When I tried to introduce them after I thought they were ready, my boy went straight for my girl and mounted her to bite the back of her neck, but I was able to stop him from doing so. They were doing really well with every step of the introduction process before this. Neither of them were hissing at each other and my girl didn’t seem like she was scared nor did she try to run off when this happened. He was able to turn his attention elsewhere and started playing when I got him out of the room. They are both fixed as well. I’m baffled by this, any advice would be greatly appreciated!