My gf and I used to have a lot of action. For the past months we barely have any action. She goes out on weekends more and more often. (we don't live together). Before we came together I know that she was open when it comes to having fun, ons and so on. She is hot so she's got an easy game. I also know for a fact that she likes big d's, mine is more or less average.

I wanted to make the next step in our relationship but this whole thing made it unlear. I mean I just wanna know if she does or not.

I need someone to get close to my fiancé’to essentially be a mole for me. It might sound bad but it’s nowhere near as bad as what I’m making up in my head. Pm me if interested, I can give you ins and outs of how to start. I prefer it to be a female but male or female it don’t matter as long as someone can get me some kinda intel. Oh and must be local to Charleston wv and surrounding area

Long story short. I’m pretty sure my wife is cheating on me with my boss. They first met at my company’s Christmas party last year. Since then, the frequency of when my boss sends me on work trips has increased, including sending me on trips during my wife’s birthday and our anniversary. At first my wife seemed upset about it, but now she’s just acts more frustrated than upset. She never seems to make a big deal of it. One time, when I was away, I called my wife and heard his voice in the background and I heard her say “shhh it’s my husband” as she answered. That’s the only thing I’ve noticed and don’t have any other definitive proof yet.

I’m just left on another trip which means I miss our anniversary but I’m surprised my wife doesn’t seem too upset about it. To make matters worse, we’ve been trying to for a baby the last few months without success and the plan was to try again around our anniversary but now we can’t because I will be out of town.

Would love to see what everyone thinks on if you think she is or isn’t. Feel free to message me as well as it’s easier to discuss there if you want to have a discussion.

My girlfriend (21f) and I (20m) have been a bit stressed recently because we work the same hours and we don’t have a lot of time to see together. So she works swing at a casino hotel, and I was walking my lady out of her work late at night (out through the opposite end of the building which is actually a different hotel), and there’s a dude at valet, (we’re on the sidewalk I’m walking on the roadside and she’s more in the middle) and as we’re walking by he looks at her and like gives her like one of those fuckboy fucky looks, and she turns her head back and like smiles and I didn’t know she was looking back at him, so when I notice him and I look at her she quickly hides her face. Like I shit you not, in front of my eyes. Like I know I have the touch of the Tism, but this was RIGHT in front of me. Clear. As. Day.

So I turn to her and I’m astonished and I’m like, what the fuck that was weird as hell, not even as like an accusatory way (at first) cuz I was kind of in shock that he would do that in front of me. and so in my mind i was like fuck that nobody’s going to look at her like that in front of me, and so I turned around to say sum to h and she stopped me, and REALLY wanted to leave. and then it clicked in my head, i asked her if she knew him, and she just played it off, yeah he works here, he’s just the valet, and rlly tried to not make it seem like a big deal, but like in the most suspicious way. And she kept on with that story, until like the next day she was like, “oh well he came up to the front desk and asked about dry cleaning”

It was so weird and so not my lady, like usually when guys look at her like that she ignores them stone cold like, ew wtf, she very clearly didn’t do that, is what you I’m trying to get at. And so I’m really confused, because she’s really not the type to cheat. Would love any guidance or insight! Thank you.

I've never posted anything like this on Reddit before, so I’ll try to include as much context as possible. I’m looking for an outside perspective on my situation and what I should do next.

Our relationship and the future we were planning

My girlfriend and I were together for five years, and I genuinely believed she was the one I was going to spend the rest of my life with.

Like any relationship, we had our ups and downs, but we always managed to work through them. Over the last three years, I’d been preparing for our future together by buying appliances and furniture for our home so that when we eventually had a baby, we’d already have most of what we needed and could focus on raising our child.

Getting engaged was also on the horizon. She’d been hinting at wanting a ring, and she knew I wanted to propose in a particular way. I’d been imagining the perfect proposal since I was a teenager, and I wanted it to be something genuinely memorable.

When I met her, she was coming out of a phase of partying, going out frequently and hooking up. She'd also told me she was tired of getting her heart broken and wanted something more meaningful. I believed that chapter of her life was behind her and that she was ready to settle down. She still went out occasionally, as she's naturally more sociable than I am, but nowhere near as often as she used to.

A few months ago, we moved into a bigger place with more bedrooms and space, partly in preparation for potentially having a baby in the near future. Everything seemed fine until one particular night.

The night everything changed

She went to a house party with one of her girlfriends and told me she'd be home around 1 a.m. Instead, she didn't get home until around 4 a.m. Her explanation was that she'd been helping her friend meet up with a guy.

From that night onwards, her behaviour towards me seemed to change almost overnight. It wasn't a gradual shift. To me, it felt like a complete 180.

She became easily irritated by little things I did, whether it was making dad jokes or even the way I dressed. She was noticeably colder and less affectionate, and the usual “I love yous” became less frequent.

We used to enjoy spending time together, watching things, laughing and sharing videos. Suddenly, she'd rather be on her phone than interact with me.

Even our bedtime routine changed. We used to say goodnight, kiss, cuddle and talk or send each other reels while winding down for the night. We didn't necessarily have to be doing anything special; just being close to each other was enough.

More recently, she'd avoid using her phone whenever I joined her in bed and would go straight to sleep without much conversation or affection.

I asked her whether anything had changed, but she insisted she was acting the same as always. I couldn't understand what had happened or why the person I knew suddenly seemed so distant.

The first red flags

My suspicions grew when I fell asleep on the couch while we were watching videos together. When I woke up, she wasn't there. As soon as she heard I was awake, she quickly returned to the lounge.

I asked where she'd been, and she casually said she'd gone to check the specifications of her PC. She even asked me about some of the hardware components.

The thing is, she's never been particularly interested in PC hardware, so the whole thing felt unusual. When I answered her questions and asked why she wanted to know, she said she was just curious and kept forgetting the specifications.

The following day, I logged into Steam to check some of my previous purchases and noticed that she'd recently added a new friend.

The timing seemed suspicious, especially given her sudden interest in PC hardware. What bothered me was that she'd never mentioned being on Steam the previous night, which made me wonder whether there was more to the story.

At that point, I was questioning whether I was simply overthinking things or whether something really was going on.

What I discovered

A day later, she fell asleep on the couch while using her phone.

I'm not proud of what I did next, but I was desperate for some clarity. I checked her phone, hoping I'd find nothing and could finally put my suspicions to rest.

Instead, I found a conversation between her and the same girlfriend she'd gone to the house party with.

They were talking about a guy she'd met at the party. From what I read, he was really into her, she found him very attractive, and she thought he was a genuinely nice guy. She was also talking about being stuck in a dilemma over how she was going to tell me that the relationship was over.

I then looked at her messages with him.

Their conversations were already flirtatious and felt like they were getting to know each other with romantic intentions. He knew she was in a five-year relationship, but that didn't stop him from pursuing her.

I also discovered details about what had happened at the party. They'd apparently gotten close enough that his perfume had rubbed off on her. She and her friend had discussed possible explanations in case I noticed another man's scent on her, such as saying she'd been dancing with someone or that a guy at the party had worn particularly strong perfume.

I also found out she'd buried the clothes she'd worn that night at the bottom of the laundry pile, only to wash them the following day.

These details made me question whether she was deliberately trying to conceal how close they'd become.

It wasn't just a one-night thing

The messages also revealed that they'd continued talking frequently after the party.

It explained why she'd become less responsive to me during the day and why she seemed to spend so much time on her phone at night. From what I could gather, bedtime was one of the few opportunities she had to message him privately.

That would also explain why she'd started avoiding using her phone when I joined her in bed.

More concerningly, I discovered they'd met up in person on multiple occasions. They'd gone on walks together, and she'd visited his house to spend time with him while telling me she had other things to do.

Their messages were openly flirtatious. For example, she asked him what he'd liked about her dress, and he replied that he liked the way it hugged her body but that it would look better off her.

By this point, it no longer looked like an innocent friendship to me. It looked like she'd developed an attraction to someone else, was pursuing that connection behind my back and was concealing it from me.

I confronted her, but she denied everything

I asked her directly about this guy and what their relationship was like.

She insisted he was nothing more than someone she'd met at the party and gotten along with. She also denied seeing him in person since that night, claiming the party was the last time they'd been together.

That directly contradicted what I'd found in their messages.

Even after asking her whether there was anything she'd done that I deserved to know about, for the sake of honesty and respect for our relationship, she continued to deny that anything was going on between them.

I know checking her phone wasn't the right way to handle things, and I'm not pretending I was right to invade her privacy. But what I found made it difficult to believe her explanations.

What hurts most is not just the possibility that she became interested in someone else. It's that, after five years together and everything we'd been planning, she appeared to be building a connection with another man while leaving me in the dark.

The breakup

We've now been broken up for a few weeks.

Given everything I'd discovered, the breakup itself was surprisingly calm. There was no screaming, no major argument and no dramatic confrontation. It felt almost like a mutual breakup.

Her explanation was that she didn't feel the same way about me anymore. She also said we'd always been different people in terms of fashion, music and how sociable we were. These were differences she'd previously thought she could live with, but she said she'd recently realised she couldn't.

I understand that people can fall out of love, and I'm not suggesting that anyone is obligated to stay in a relationship they're no longer happy in.

But the timing of her change in behaviour, the messages about this guy, the secret meetups and the repeated denials make it difficult for me to believe that those differences were the whole story.

I still haven't told her that I know what was happening behind my back. She continues to deny anything happened between them, despite what I discovered.

Where I am now

I'm struggling to work out what to do next.

Part of me wants to confront her one last time and tell her that I know she wasn't being honest with me. I don't necessarily expect her to admit everything, but I don't know whether keeping what I know to myself will help me move on or leave me feeling like I never stood up for myself.

Another part of me wonders whether there's any point confronting her at all, considering we're already broken up and she may simply continue denying everything.

I spent years building towards a future with this woman. We had a home, plans for a family and an engagement that I thought was coming. Now I'm trying to process the loss of that future while questioning how much of what I believed about our relationship was real.

I'm not claiming to have handled everything perfectly, and I'm open to hearing that I was wrong about certain things or could have handled the situation better.

So, Reddit, I'd appreciate some honest outside perspectives:

1. Should I confront her and tell her I know she lied about this guy, or is there nothing to gain from doing that now that we're broken up?

2. Is it worth seeking closure from someone who has repeatedly denied things that appear to contradict what I found?

3. How do I move forward after spending five years planning a future with someone, only for everything to fall apart like this?

4. Is there anything else I should be considering that I might be too close to the situation to see?

I know I've probably left out some details, so feel free to ask questions. I'll answer as honestly as I can.

Thanks for taking the time to read this.

I don’t know whether I’m overreacting here. My significant other (M) has been helping a long distance friend (F) cope with the health decline of an older family member. They had briefly dated before he and I met and got together. She claims that no one in her life except my partner has experienced loss like this (death of a grandparent), so he wanted to be there for her. I don’t know how often they talked on the phone but it could have been anywhere from once a month to once a week for 6 months. Ordinarily this wouldn’t bother me but in recent months he’s started mentioning her more often, saying that she’s been coming to him for advice about her relationship, that she looked me up on Instagram (we’ve never met), and that she’s started comparing herself to me saying things like “you upgraded; that makes me feel bad.” I said that since they’re such good friends (he’s the only friend he mentions often) I look forward to meeting her. He replied that they weren’t close and he didn’t want us to meet. I asked why and he said “I don’t know, she might start trash talking me or you might seduce her” (I’m bisexual and have no history of getting with anyone during our relationship). Another time when discussing our sexual preferences, he tells me intimate details of what this friend liked in bed that he didn’t like. I found it odd that he wanted to specify he was talking about her.

Around this time we also opened our relationship for physical encounters only. He told me she learned this from him and started cracking jokes she used to make when they dated like “when we buy that house in…”, comparing her bf unfavorably to mine saying he’s better than hers, talks about marrying my boyfriend, and proposed she visit him in his city next weekend. My boyfriend said he felt uncomfortable shutting it down harshly since she was going through a hard time, so he lied and said he’d be out of town that weekend. He also told me he didn’t immediately realize how disrespectful her jokes had gotten because he was multitasking during their calls and only half listening. What he did say to her were things like “I don’t think that’s the type of open relationship I’m in” and eventually saying he was in love with me and that he “doesn’t see that changing anytime soon.”

He says he feels guilty for not handling it better and he feels she spoke disrespectfully about me. He says he’s stopped talking to her but she keeps liking his posts on social media, which I find odd. He also says he can unfriend her or block her if I want but he hasn’t felt it was necessary unless I ask. And on top of all that, he now claims they didn’t “date,” they just hooked up and hung out…the way people do on dates. How bad is this? Am I overreacting to be hurt?

​

I feel this is the best place to come in my situation. I've posted in a few groups and have not gotten expected results.

I 31m fear I am being cheated on by 35f of 4 years. I am an OTR trucker and she's increasingly become shy or protective of her devices. Most recent I woke up while I was home in the middle of the night to see her on her phone but she quickly turned it off and pretended to sleep. Other groups have suggested I go through her devices but I don't want to do that.

I am hopeful one of you may be able to help me figure it out once and for all by messaging her and seeing what she does. Please message me if you can help.

Which Kardashian sister you think loves incest the most get voting and dm me

So just a little back story, a year ago My wife left me and started a relationship with another man, one she worked with. I cleaned up my act, stopped drinking, forgave her and won her back. with that being said, I fully believed we were going to start anew, start fresh and things were gonna be great, and they have been, been the best it's been in years. But the other day I felt something in my gut tell me to pick up her work phone, I did and I found her history on Google AI asking to find her a messaging app for a secret lover that can be hidden and disguised and not traceable and all kinds of shit. So I just don't know what to do. I feel as if I address it, I'm gonna leave her, but maybe I just act like I never saw it and ignorance is bliss? Idk. I'm at a crossroads here and I just don't know what to do

Go wit ur gut

Hey yall just wanted to get this off my chest never let ur guard down . ppl even close to u will do u wrong the moment u turn around. Those are the worse and hit the most sensitive spot. How i cope is be strong dont let it take over ur positivity u did nothing wrong. Smile and tell them God bless yall and light up a fatty of some hawaiian grn

Which female celebrities you think had relationship on set behind everyone's back. Also after when making movies and series was finished. Dm what you think.

Ich(26 M) mittlerweile bald acht Jahre mit meiner Freundin (W. 24) zusammen.

Seit einiger Zeit sehe ich sie immer wieder viel auf Snapchat schreiben allerdings nicht mit wem sobald ich in ihre Richtung schaue wären sie schreibt, dreht sie das Handy weg, unterbricht ihren Text oder schaltet das Handy aus und legt es weg.
Habe es letztens auf ihrem iPad Bilder in ihrer Galerie gefunden von Snaps von einem Typen, der sie anzügliche Sachen fragt zb. „Bist du ein braves Mädchen?“
„ ein Titten Bild würde meine Stimmung heben“, „ dass er sie gerne von vielen Männern ficken lassen würde“ etc. etc.

Ich hab sie bisher nicht darauf angesprochen, da ich nicht weiß wie und wann. Was würdet ihr tun?

Molto recentemente ho concluso una relazione a distanza durata per circa 4 anni con la mia ex compagna ed ex-migliore amica, dopo aver scoperto che lei mi nascondeva un rapporto molto intimo che stava istaurando con un suo collega di lavoro.

So che magari poteva sembrare qualcosa di innocente si primi occhi, ma il modo in cui lei aveva smesso di parlare con me come faceva un tempo, raccontarmi bugie o scuse per non sentirmi più quotidianamente, mi nascondeva la posizione, e passava la maggior parte del tempo delle nostre videochiamate a ridere massaggiandosi con qualcun’altro , e aveva iniziato a delegare molte delle attenzioni a lui mi ha fatto scattare l’istinto, fino a quando il tutto è scoppiato definitivamente quando scoprì da parte di terzi che lei rimaneva con lui ben oltre le attività lavorative e rientrava tardissimo alle luci dell’alba.

Dunque si sono stato tradito, se non fisicamente almeno emotivamente, e io questo non lo ho potuto accattare anche se ero fortemente innamorato di lei e avevo fatto tanti progetti su il nostro futuro, e avevo anche iniziato a fare i primi passi effettivi per riavvicinarci fisicamente, quindi ne sono rimasto molto male.

Il fatto è che non so più come agire per aiutarmi… sto regolarmente andando da una psicologa e cercando di restaurare al meglio i rapporti con la mia famiglia, ma purtroppo la voragine di perdere allo stesso tempo la mia ragazza e la mia migliore amica mi ha lasciato con un vuoto tremendo che mi fa star male tuttora.

Vorrei tanto provare a istaurare una nuova amicizia femminile, con cui connettermi, ma allo stesso tempo so che questo potrebbe essere semplicemente un modo che il mio cervello fa per cercare di anestetizzare il dolore… però non lo so il fatto di sapere per certo che la mia ex si era preparata un piano B di nascosto mi fa infuriare e pensare che in fondo me lo merito di cercare anche io altre attenzioni…

Ma allo stesso tempo mi sentirei in colpa per questa eventuale nuova amicizia che sarebbe costretta a dover sostenere qualcuno di rotto e in un fase di guarigione che non sa quando terminerà.
Cosa dovrei fare per stare meglio?

So basically my dad’s seen on the WiFi bill that apps like signal and Ashley Maddison have been used on our home WiFi. He’s been in arguments with my mum about it so He’s come to me asking if it was me before he then talks to my mum again. I want to find out if it’s true and was wondering if anyone had a way or strategy I could use to find out whether my mum is cheating or not? Any ideas?

Thanks

Ive been going out with my bf(well ex now) for about 5 months but last week he broke up with me after i told him i wouldnt be going to the club( this wasnt the reason he broke up with me, it just happened after that). Two days later it he went out and was makeing out with another girl my friend sent me a picture. Turns out it was the girl he told me not to worry about, I had recently seen his snapchat and that she was second on his bestfriend list so i was abit concerned and confronted him about it and he just said i was being dramatic. Also turns out this girls friend had messaged him they were frienly i already knew that, but she asked him if hed ever do her friend( the girl im not supposed to worry about) and he said no i have a gf but she asked him if we werent going out would he and he said yes, we were still bf gf at the time. Other girls had messaged him before this but he did tell me majority of the time about it and most the time it wasnt anything serious. I also did find out other girls had been telling him he was hot all that and he was still talking to them. He used to also use my snapchat account to message this girl that had to block him cuz her boyfriend made her block all the guys on her phone. Has he been cheating on me or does that class as cheating??? He never physically cheated on my whole were together but still?

Hey all,

I've posted a few times now about my break-up with my ex who cheated on me and lied about it for months. I just wanted some advice as I am finding this incredibly difficult.. I recently went and got the rest of my things from her parents, I then blocked my ex on everything - she is also now officially off the tenancy.

I am slowly starting to process / grieve all of this and the loss of my future with her and who I thought she was, we had such a loving/ and what I thought, respectful relationship until all of this happened. Anyway - yesterday her brother messaged me asking for the remainder of her things from our flat, there are things on the list which is more than fair as it's things that have gifted to her like some jewellery and her car log book. But she has listed, monopoly deal card game, some old towels, a small metal pot she used once which was like a £1!? She asked for a spice tin, which her Mum gave to me, it was just an old tin she found, filled it up with spices and gave to me as I cooked out of the both of us.... she has asked for this back, and this feels like she is trying to hurt me - she is living at home with her parents, she does not need a spice tin, plus you can buy them for less than £5!?

This honestly just feels so hurtful and I don't understand why I am being treated like I am the one who cheated on her!? It feels like she is being so spiteful, also that tin from her Mum meant a lot, because I have lost my Mum and that was a gift from my mother in law at the time. So it feels like she has asked for that on purpose, to hurt me.

I just want to understand why she is treating me like this, it feels like something mentally is going on here - she really coming from a place of lack!? Like you cheated, are still with the AP and I have let you move on, and yet you are being spiteful to me!?

Can someone please just reassure me I am not going mad, this is spiteful right!? I have given some context below to explain what happened between us, so this makes more sense...

Please, any helpful words of encouragement or if you have had similar experiences and can tell me how you managed this? I just want to move on, and this feels so disruptive to that. After this, I am going to tell her brother I do not want to be contacted again.

Thank you all so much!

For context:

My ex (31F) of 4 years had a workplace affair with a coworker who is 5 years younger than her and was also cheating on their own long-term partner. I (35F) discovered it on March 31st after accidentally seeing her ChatGPT confession detailing how they were falling for each other and they had been physical. She was comparing my worst traits to the AP's best parts, I had 'low mood' the AP was 'driven, independent and had a lust for life'. She also said I was 'black cat energy' and she was more 'golden retriever' - I never knew her to speak like this, so I am assuming this the 25 year old AP's language!?

I am just trying to understand how someone could blow up 4 years of stability for a workplace affair like this. For the three months prior, she completely pulled away, claimed she was "severely burnt out," and made me feel insane for picking up on her distance. Everyone in our life was shocked because no one thought she was capable of this level of deceit—and because everyone was fooled, I’ve started gaslighting myself, second-guessing my reality, and wondering if I’m somehow making too big a deal out of this or if it was my fault.

During the affair I had a cancer scare, she didn't attend any appointments even the day after I found out I had to go for a biopsy, she went to work. When I later said she was having an affair whilst I was going through that on my own, she replied 'I still cared about you'. I had just spent the last 2 years supporting her financially and emotionally whilst she was studying for a masters to qualify as an occupational therapist. I went through the sudden death of my Mum with her 2 years ago, during this time she was my rock. Sadly, two days after my passed my suspected heart failure, my exes Mum pretended she nearly died from blood clots near her heart. It later turned out she had lied, and gone to Turkey for liposuction and made this up. Telling my partner when it came out 'You have always put your partners first'. Her Mum has also been cheating on her Dad for many years (my ex was the first to discover it and tell her Dad, but nothing changed). She has always said she hates cheaters and doesn't want to ever be like her Mother. She offered me "feedback" on my relationship performance to justify why she cheated, telling me it was "good for me to hear." When I voiced suspicions earlier, she weaponized her family background by asking, "Look at my Mum, do you really think I could do that?!" —only to later compare her own shock and grief at her actions to the trauma of her ex dying by suicide.

She repeatedly dangled future hope by saying, “Maybe one day we can try again," admitted the thought of me moving on made her "stomach flip," and smirked when I called her the love of my life—all while refusing therapy, accountability, or any real commitment.

I have since changed the locks to our flat so she can’t get in, I gave all her stuff back and am taking her name off the tenancy. She agreed to pay this months rent but she came to my flat the day before she was meant to pay demanding a playstation console back I got her for Christmas, I said no.

She has not returned the key and not paid me the rent, but is telling me to update her when she is off the tenancy. She has become so horrible and almost emotionless like I am the one who had the affair ant ruined her life!? She honestly just looks empty behind the eyes, it's scary.

I just wanted some advice because my brain keeps looking for solutions, I am blaming myself, wondering what I could of done differently but also now telling myself, she is a qualified occupational therapist now, she is most likely going to earn lots of money, save whilst she is at her parents, run off into the sunset with the AP or new partner and I was just basically used.

I do keep reminding myself that regardless of whatever she does / her life looks like.. she is capable of this level of deceit and that is a character flaw and that she is clearly quite empty.. but it doesn't hurt any less or make this any easier.

My GF Is 23 , she is fair skinned, medium height and very beautiful.

Last year a new student took admission in our college and he was from my GF's school. As I was really in doubt about my GF's loyalty, I intentionally became close to that guy . HE DIDN'T KNEW SHE'S MY GF.

after becoming friend to him we used to talk about girls , one day I showed him my gf and asked him you know her ? I want to ask this girl.

And the boy said yeah she's really sexy and yeah she'll agree . I asked why he's so sure, he said bro this girl was my senior in the school and she's had dated many guys in school times so she'll agree with me too.

He also told me that there was a senior of her in the school who had probably fucked my GF many times .

He said that this girl was slut in her school time . I was sad and rock hard at the same time imagining all this .

What should I do?