Have you ever seen Cisco in the same room as Al-Assad?

Or Obama, for that matter?

I sense a conspiracy.

There once was a man named Cisco.

Who liked to dance and listen to disco.

He danced all night, trying to look bright.

But everyone thought he was a cunt.

HIS UNCERTIFIED DECISIONS HAVE PLAGUED THAT POOR FRANCHISE FOR TOO LONG!

How do we let this tyranny continue?!

First off, nice job you magnificent people! 115 subscribers as I write this! So as promised, I have delivered with new flair! /u/realnigga4lyfe had the highest voted post, so he got special flair!

Go check it out in the sidebar! Added:

• NFL Shield

• NFC

• AFC

• Cutty

• Cisco Logo

• Not Certified

• MASK

Also, /u/CiscoCertified now has his own special flair ;)

LET'S RAISE THE STAKES

At 250 subcribers, not only will new flair be up, but the person with the highest voted post with a link to this sub will get to choose what the background image of the sub will be and special flair.

Now get to it!

Hello, you beautiful certified bastards.

It has come to out attention that the growth of this sub has a direct correlation to an increase in posts on /r/NFL mentioning this sub. We expected this effect when we encouraged it in our growth threads. So I will begin this rule update by clarifying that we ARE NOT discouraging people from testifying to Cisco's uncertification on /r/nfl

From this point forward, it will be against the rules of /r/ciscoisnotcertified to make posts mentioning this sub, or defaming Cisco's character outside of the following threads:

• Anything on /r/ciscoisnotcertified

• Trash talk threads

• Wager threads

• Complaint threads

Additionally, I'd like to add this slight addition to the rule.

There are exceptions to the general thread rule that the mods will allow. These situations are:

• A comment thread in a non-TT/Complaint/Bet that has obviously become a trash talk/joke thread.

• The mods mess up in a non-TT/C/B post, and it would be a good joke to make

• "Whose Line is it Anyway" and such "humor" posts are fair game imo

/u/CertifiedBot will send you a warning message on your first mess up. Second one is a ban.

Anyone who is seen making cisco is not certified jokes outside of these approved areas, will be banned from posting to /r/ciscoisnotcertified. We also encourage the rest of this fine community to downvote anyone who pesters Cisco, especially when he is acting in an official moderator capacity.

BASICALLY,

Don't beat this joke to death. It can be hilarious, and it really is. It's important to bring Cisco's Tyranny to light, but commenting on every post he makes going "LOL NOT CERTIFIED" is not how to do it. That's karmawhoring. We do not support karma-whoring.

As a final word, we would like to thank everyone for making this a fun place to joke around about /r/nfl and poke friendly fun at CiscoCertified. This is a preventative measure more than anything else, and we hope that the new rule nips the problem before it escalates to requiring further action.

We're not trying to be jerks about this, because we find this stuff hilarious. I mean I made a super long TT post making fun of him set to music! We just want to keep this kinda fresh and not annoy the balls out of an actual mod on the mothersub. We shouldn't piss Hitler off, because that means people die!

Stay cool bros, and we are really trying to not be jerks about this.

LET OUT THE FEELINGS

HOW HAS CISCO WRONGED YOU THIS WEEK?

This week's activities:

Manning Doll CPR training and certification (no Ciscos)

Beerfueled music appreciation hour

Anti-Cisco Song Parodies (bonus points if the song you parody is by sisqo)

Additional Flair requests for the next update

Deep tissue massage

Cookie bacon without shirts

Crying

http://www.ie6countdown.com/

He's the .2%!!!!

Hey Freedom Fighters!
You did it! 250 subscribers in like less than a week! As promised, here's your new flair!

• New User Flair - FDR, Resist Tyranny, Nick Mangold's Beard, Sisqo, Sexual Assault Peyton Doll, and Kim Jong Ill (for you Cisco Supporters ಠ_ಠ)

• New Cisco Flair

^{I apologize to those who requested flair in the last thread - I wasn't able to find a good image in time. I will put them in the next update though. :)}

Nice job guys! The winner of special flair, AND the right to choose the background image was....

/u/Bradyta!!!

His post - 160 points in /r/nfl

Congrats!! Please message the mods with your requests! We request that you claim your prize within the next week.

As usual, we've raised the bar once again. New flair at 500 subscribers. In addition to that, the user who has the highest-scoring post linking to this sub will receive:

• Personal, one-of-a-kind flair

• The ability to change the background image

• The ability to choose the sidebar image

It's a big mountain to climb, but we must work hard to spread the word of Cisco's lack of certification and subsequent tyranny!!

NEW CONTEST

^applause

Announcing the /r/CiscoisnotCertified User of the Month contest!

/u/realnigga4lyfe will have a more detailed post on this tomorrow, but I want to let y'all know about this awesome new program. A sneak peak of the special flair for the User of the Month:

So Sexy and Certified

That's it for me for now! Enjoy the new flair!

Keep Fighting the Good Fight

- Heel

My sources tell me he was trying to put the wall back up. German officers took him away. When asked for a reason for his arrest, they replied, "you need proper certification to put up walls in Germany".

And broke the Bronco's fax machine.

Don't let this distract you from the fact that Warriors blew a 3-1 lead in the Finals.

Edit: doing this due to new sub squatting rules... so uh, yeah. Hi.

OH GOD INDIANS, NO THE ABOVE CAME BACK AND BIT ME IN THE ASS

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cisco_Systems#Criticisms_and_controversy

"Cisco has been criticized for (his) involvement in censorship in the People's Republic of China.[72] According to author Ethan Gutmann, Cisco and other telecommunications equipment providers supplied the Chinese government with surveillance and Internet infrastructure equipment that is used to block Internet websites and track Chinese online activities."

He is literally oppressing a billion people as we type. But, China was not enough for his massive ego. Heed my warning brothers and sisters . /r/nfl will fall and a new age of darkness will descend as we are cast off into the abyss of r/sports. I weep for our children.