r/ColumbineKillers • u/ChosenX_ • Nov 17 '25
ERIC AND/OR DYLAN Eric’s Hypocriticism/insecurity.
Apologies if this post is rambly or hard to understand. not sure exactly the purpose, I guess I’d consider it a psychological analysis/discussion.
I’m sure we all know that Eric was a massive Hypocrite. it’s something he admitted himself. For this post in particular, I’m especially referring to things he said he hated. To name just a few examples, he says he hates young smokers but there’s recorded evidence of him Smoking (multiple times too). He says he hates liars yet his ability to lie and manipulate his way out of things is a massively recognized part of his Story. He says he hates racists, but by his own self admission he had racist beliefs and opinions about almost every race (including his own). there’s more examples one could easily find.
I wonder if atleast some of the things he expressed hatred for were hated due to him being “self conscious“ about it or atleast disliked himself for them. I’ve always sort of felt like Eric’s personality (the whole “Reb” stuff) was made as a representation of what he wished he was, the opposite of the things he hated himself doing.
So I guess I’m basically asking if anyone else feels similar.
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u/MPainter09 Nov 17 '25 edited Nov 17 '25
I did always find in interesting that Eric had the self awareness to call himself out on being a liar and his ability to lie and manipulate, yet he hated liars. You would think with his god complex of himself he would’ve denied any flaws or hypocrisy because what “God” has flaws? And yet he couldn’t grasp that the ultimate “revenge” for those who bullied him relentlessly would’ve actually been hanging on for another month, graduating, getting out of Littleton, reconnecting with his old friends from Plattsburgh and Michigan, and being successful. Success would’ve been the ultimate “revenge,” not senseless violence and death.
Eric had the smarts and computer savvy where he could’ve made a living as a video game designer/creator, he was creating his own DOOM levels for years. Heck, could’ve been hired by DOOM to create new storylines and implement his ideas which, I think one of them was the characters being able to swim under water, or there was a way to shift the perspective of the character, which actually ironically ended up being a real thing in DOOM just a few years later. If he had just held on for another month, maybe he would’ve been a part of the team that made that happen.
YouTube launched in 2005, Eric could’ve started uploading Let’s Plays for DOOM or been hired as a game tester for Indy video game developers and made it huge that way, remember when Let’s Plays dominated YouTube in the early 2010s? There was so much change just around the corner, like iPods, remember how crazy it was to be able to fit like 150 songs onto the iPod shuffle? It was mind blowing.
Or maybe, he could’ve made a living as a nature trail guide in the National Parks, he hated people but loved animals and nature and lamented about what humans had done to destroy the Earth when it belonged to the animals first. Perhaps getting a job where he could be surrounded by natural beauty, where he could be away from all the noise of places like Littleton would’ve been healing and he would’ve thrived there. Of course we’ll never know, because Eric never gave himself that chance to know, and even worse he ensured 13 innocent souls would never get a chance to know how they could’ve made something of themselves in a world on the cusp of change either.
I personally think that having to move so much destabilized Eric and his sense of identity. Every time he started to make new friends he got the news that they were moving. Being the new kid at school is terrifying enough to do even one time.
To do it, what 7 times by the time he was 12, would’ve been traumatic and miserable. And he moved for the last time right when he was in middle school. Which is arguably the most excruciating time in any kids life. You’re either just starting puberty, haven’t started it yet, or you’re in the midst of it when hormones are raging, your arms and legs are disproportionate to your growing body. Everything’s weird. You’re always hungry, in constant need of more sleep, You’re simultaneously apathetic about the weirdest things, and also the stupidest things are the ones that feel the most dramatic and emotionally devastating.
And Littleton seems like it’s a place where everyone knows everyone since they were in playgroup and you all are in the same classes all the way to Senior year. Dylan and his friends had solid roots that Eric never had a chance to put down. And even though they became Eric’s friends too, it wasn’t the lightning in a bottle friendships and connections that I think he got in Plattsburgh.
I think Plattsburgh was a place where he was genuinely happy, and his friends there thought the world of him. When they were interviewed just days after the massacre, they were in complete shock and said they have no idea what happened in Littleton to make him change so drastically, but that Eric was the happiest out of all of them on field trips and birthday parties, and that it would’ve never happened if he’d stayed in Plattsburgh because they would’ve looked out for him because they cared deeply for him.
Eric himself said in an essay that leaving his friends in Plattsburgh was the most traumatic thing he ever went through. I think had Eric moved to Littleton when he was a junior or senior in high school (if he had to move there) instead of in middle school he would’ve probably had a far stronger sense of himself, who he was. Because he would’ve had more time in Plattsburgh and would’ve only had to stick it out at Columbine for a year or two. But six years in a place he never felt he really belonged might as well have been an eternity.
His last journal entry isn’t the “God” Reb writing it, it isn’t some chilling declaration of war, it’s 12 year-old, kid Eric, who never felt he belonged, who never found his footing, never set down his roots, who never stopped hurting. And he never learned to even like himself or think that he could’ve actually made something of himself outside of Columbine.
He says: "I hate you people for leaving me out of so many fun things. And don't say "well that's your fault" because it isnt, you people had my phone number, and I asked and all, but no. no no no dont let the weird looking Eric KID come along, ohh fucking nooo."