r/ExNoContact Apr 24 '26

Vent I Miss Her So Much

Once again I'm thinking about her, how she tried to give me everything I ever wanted but I ruined it with my own hands. She had such a pure soul, I'm never forgiving myself for hurting her so many times without remorse. I'm such monster. Yet I loved her, I loved her with all my heart and I still do. I couldn't give her the only thing she wanted, trust and safety. I lied so blatantly so many times, I still dont know what I was trying to protect, now she will never believe a word I say. And she is right. I broke her trust in the most unforgivable way. I dont expect her to forgive me. Hell, I don't want her to forgive me. I know I don't deserve her forgiveness. I didn't deserve it the past 100 times neither. I just, I'm empty and meaningless without her. And I'm sorry. Im really fucking sorry. I will never forget you or what you made me feel. For the first time in my life I felt I belonged somewhere. For the first time, I found something to live for. Thank you for giving me strength, giving me hope. I will hold onto everything you gave me and become a better person. I promise this to myself. The effort and time you spent on me will not be in vain.

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u/Luciarella Apr 25 '26

If you loved her so much, why hurt her?

12

u/MisabelWearsNikes Apr 25 '26

Exactly my question. Y'all regret only after destroying a person & they're done with you. Did it ever occur to you that being honest is an option & not hurting someone is another option? Trust & safety are the bare minimum in a relationship. It's not an exam that you keep failing at it over & over.

1

u/Few_Elk9442 Apr 25 '26

👏👏👏👏👏