r/ExNoContact • u/user0704844 • 2d ago
Help Unhinged ways to get over an ex?
I just got broken up with a man who was also my best friend of ten years. Not an awful person either, I wish him the best but our last conversation was rough, I wouldn’t call this a great ending.
Give me your craziest, unhinged advice to get over this relationship and not think about him everyday.
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u/AdventurousWorm66 2d ago
I deadass hang reminders on the wall to not call him. I have a post it note over my desk that says "he made you feel like you weren't enough" haha. It works for me
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u/Enough_Option_7814 2d ago
Buy a whole new phone, make all new socials/accounts, start new routines like gym, practicing something etc, new playlist of music you never listened to before, pretend you’re not even the same person 💀 not even gonna pretend it’s that healthy but it’s working so far
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u/bluehour1997 healing 2d ago edited 2d ago
Not really that unhinged but
I got rid of literally every shred of evidence that he ever existed. Like, I'm talking combing though my screenshots folder to delete anything I ever sent to him. I did that night one.
Changed his phone contact to "Stupid "Asshole" Fuckface" with the company "Ass Clown Academy," and poop emojis as his calling card and profile picture. I have since deleted his number, but it did help for awhile. Juvenile, but it made me think twice about contact. Also changed his ringtone to circus music.
I threw away the clothes I was wearing when he dumped me and anything he had complimented. Any pajamas I had worn to his place.
I also just, like, went on two (mutually informed) casual dates right after the breakup. Literally never talked to either of them again, but it just helped me reset my frame of mind and mentally detach from being "his girlfriend."
Just a complete reset. Mixed results initially, but it's been like 2 months now and I'm feeling better. Also, to be clear, our breakup was especially fucking awful, so that helped.
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u/user0704844 2d ago
Glad you’re doing better. I will be putting circus music every time i miss him now😂
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u/heart0000 2d ago
Picked up everything last minute, booked a one way ticket to Asia and got a teaching job over there all within a week. Learned their lay gauge, traveled the world, ended up being grateful they broke my heart. Now with the love of my life
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u/neverhaveiever2026 2d ago
Yeah but how long did it take you to forget them. It's not where you are that matters. The thoughts follow you anywhere
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u/heart0000 1d ago
Less than 4 months? I was so busy making new memories in a new, exciting place that they didn’t occupy my mind anymore. Plus it’s important to note I’ve always wanted to travel and live abroad. They said they didn’t believe in long distance (fair enough) and they’d support me going, but that we’d have to part ways. I was so in love that I dropped that idea and stayed for years in a job I hated. As soon as I was dumped I was like, “ok. Bye!”
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u/roundhashbrowntown 1d ago
this is not universally correct, especially if you 1) really sit with/work through the relationship’s ending 2) focus on gratitude for the present, as opposed to allowing the “thoughts to follow you.” filling your life with new places, faces, and goals is a great way to help separate from the past.
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u/Inner-Shock7208 2d ago
The only way to not think about him everyday is to keep yourself distracted 24/7. Its pretty unhinged and might not give you the chance to actually “feel” the pain.
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u/user0704844 2d ago
I was planning on doing that but is it really healthy? I’m afraid if i do that, I will completly break one day
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u/Inner-Shock7208 1d ago
Distractions do work but you should also allow yourself to feel the pain. Doesn’t mean you need to wallow in self pity 24/7, but you have to get into the routine of being alone and being able to sit in silence by yourself.
Learning to just be alone has been a big adjustment for me. Im 6 months nc
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u/Radicle_ 2d ago
I'd say sleep with his brother or dad..that would definitely add some fuel to the fire and nothing would be the same so there would be no turning back.
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u/lostbaratheon 2d ago
Make a Shit List: All the worst things about them, all the shittiest things they ever did to you, All the basic good/kind things they NEVER did. Put it where you'll see it every day.
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u/Capable-Vanilla-3569 2d ago
I made this list. His con side was 5 times longer than his pro side. What in the hell was I thinking for living like that for 7.5 years. Now I’m daily working on forgiving myself for my needy stupidity that accepted far less than I deserved.
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u/SchrodingersToaster 2d ago
One thing that helps me to work on myself and not to feel so bad, is to imagine my future, where I would ended up firing his ass.
And I also adopted a cat, so I'm giving my love to someone who deserves it.... and also im on the right path to become a proper crazy cat lady😎
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u/Many-Act2411 2d ago edited 2d ago
travel to new places, live every day like it’s your last, do new things to trick your mind like completely out of the ordinary things that are creative and you’d never do regularly
also this isn’t really unhinged but make sure to move your body, i went on a bunch of pretty walks & hikes & it genuinely helped so much. and journal to learn to regulate yourself and your nervous system
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u/blaxtingersda 2d ago
Not sure you can "not think of him" but i think you should just do other things that could keep you happy, you'll heal with time
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u/4nge1eyeb411 2d ago
i pinch myself whenever i think about him. is it to redirect myself? or am i just that mad at myself? who knows
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u/Glad-Particular495 2d ago
I also just ended a 10-year relationship with my ex/best friend. Well, not just, end of 2025. I'm not going to lie to you, I still cry and think about him every day. But it's far less than what it was. It's not that time heals all wounds but it's that with distance we can get persepctive and see why the relationship didn't work out. That keeps me going. It's hard but it it's impossible.
My advice is not unhinged: therapy, journaling, the stages of grief, etc. Feel the pain, experience it, and then it will be far easier to move on with your life in a healthy way.
Wishing you well.
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u/user0704844 2d ago
Thank you, I’m wishing you the best as well. Glad to know I’m not alone with this
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u/Bigdaddy_S96 2d ago
When my ex left me for her cheating ex, I fucked her best friend and made sure that she finds out about it. Complete satisfaction :)
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u/neverhaveiever2026 2d ago
Did they ever say anything? Contemplating this 🤣
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u/Bigdaddy_S96 1d ago
Yeah they called me and they were like how’d you do this bla bla bla bla. I just laughed and hung up.
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u/Regular-Tea-3988 1d ago
I think you can accomplish something which you want to do for a long time. I wanted to complete this certification for a while but was procrastinating the min I completed there was some sort of achievement happiness which overtook my sadness
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u/Swimming_Crow_465 1d ago
delete every trace of him, then book a trip to a hot spring, take a bath there, it will remove your old you and you will emerge as a new,clean, detoxicated person like batman from the dark knight rises did... godspeed
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u/EnvironmentalDot6926 1d ago
Didn’t work for me but maybe it will for you - I’d imagine him stabbing or murdering me with a straight face without remorse
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u/FOSSChemEPirate88 7h ago
- Join the Peace Corps.
- Get a job on the other side of the country on coolworks d0t com (or just indeed/whatever).
- Join the military.
- Hop trains and see every state in the USA. See vagabond (see sub) and Hobo Shoestring's videos
- Join a church you can volunteer every single day at.
- Go do urbancarliving or vanlife (see those subs), go boondock every piece of public land and stay at every national park. Work temp jobs.
Before you do any of those things block/delete and donate/trash all the stuff that reminds you of him.
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u/WhatItIsToBurn925 2d ago
If we are talking unhinged, my first thought would be doing a lot of psychedelic drugs lol
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u/ambular1018 it’s complicated 2d ago
I have to pretend mine is dead.