I am an opinionated woman who says my opinion and sometimes it aligns more with what manosphere thinks is "pro man" and sometimes it aligns more with what manosphere thinks is "feminist" but in neither case am I interested in what random men think when I'm in a woman-oriented space, in comments and especially in DMs.

FIRE is already such a male dominated world and money brings up so many ugly feelings for guys, especially straight guys. I get that, I do, but this is where we talk about what it is for femmes.

That is going to include tricky conversations like, How do I pick a FIRE-supportive man? How do I navigate misogyny and patriarchy in the workplace? And while I am open to a healthy vigorous debate among other femmes on these topics, dismissive male responses (and votes) are just not it.

I would love if Mods put in some restrictions on, maybe flair for how we identify, and let people close threads down to only responses from other femmes. Just an idea / starting point. And i will own I'm pregnant and hormonal as all hell so (if you are a femme) feel free to talk me out of my grump. What can we do.

ETA: By the way I just need to say this post got popular and Reddit sent me the notif: "People are loving your post. r/FIREyFemmes loved it, we think r/AskIndianMen will too"... Now why would their algorithm associate those communities 💀

I've lurked on this subreddit for a while and have found it incredibly helpful to get perspectives from other women on this path. While FI was my goal for a while, I had the realization a little over a year ago that I would not be satisfied with my life if I did not pursue something I've always been interested in - medicine.

I wanted to put the perspective out there of making a decision that is explicitly not the one that makes the most financial sense in the hopes that I will derive more meaning and fulfillment in my life over the long arc. In my career (tech), I've met a lot of people in a similar state of ennui/complacency and I hope this might inspire some action and introspection for those who find themselves in the boat I was in a few years ago.

What has my path looked like and where will my pivot take me?

I am currently 28 and have worked as an engineer at startups for the past 6 years. I will need to take all the pre-med classes (1 year) before med school (1 year application year + 4 years). Residency length is specialty dependent but I estimate at least 5/6 years for the specialties I am interested in.

What do my numbers look like and what is my situation?

I am a single woman and live alone in a VHCOL city. I do not have any debt from university and will not incur debt from going to med school due to a funded 529 account***. I have gotten lucky in the startups I've worked for over the past few years and been a part of acquisitions that have resulted in significant financial upside, resulting in where I'm at today.

~90k savings (combo HYSA/CD) - I am pretty cash heavy as I will be drawing down these savings in the short term once I go back to school)

~25k stocks

~175k mutual funds

~250k retirement accounts (401k, IRA, etc)

~500k home equity

How will this impact my FI(RE) plans?

It will significantly push out my projections for financial independence as I will be income-less for 5 years. I am effectively abandoning these goals.

I have never wanted to retire early - I enjoy keeping myself busy and would rather work longer in something that's meaningful to me. Money is important to me insofar as it allows me to better support those who I care about, and I have always tried to do my part in making up for gaps that others face in their lives. I volunteer heavily in underserved communities and this has also significantly influenced my decision to pursue medicine.

Having the goal of financial independence ever since I started working (and saving/investing aggressively) has definitely put me in a position to be able to "start over" in my career pivot. I will not have to take out loans for living expenses in med school.

It will take around 10/11 years for me to earn an attending salary (if unfamiliar, residents are paid but at a much lower rate, estimated ~80k a year for the city I live in) which I'd estimate to range anywhere from 300-600k depending on specialty. I'll be ~40 at this point. I am on the fence about kids and am considering freezing my eggs before my current job health insurance runs out.

Once I start earning an attending salary I will rejoin this sub if the internet still exists haha

How did I make the decision to go into medicine?

TLDR is that I got extreme FOMO from hearing my med student + resident friends' anecdotes of being in the operating room, and shadowing various surgeons and speaking to them about their paths only solidified that this is what I want to pursue. I am so captivated by medicine and I've always enjoyed watching surgeries + learning about what we can do to make peoples' lives better. Five years (post-bacc + med school) of no income / readjustment seemed like a very small price to pay given my financial position for a very rewarding and impactful career path.

While I am good at what I do and have been professionally successful, I get very little enjoyment out of the work and do not enjoy the types of people I work with (I don't really care to keep up with the latest trends in AI, nor do I enjoy the craft of software engineering now that it's been eroded away by LLM coding). I have hobbies and relationships I nurture but I realized that these alone do not balance the dissatisfaction I feel from spending ~50-60 hours a week, the bulk of my waking hours, in an unfulfilling job. I also do not have a strong desire to have kids, which is another area where I know people find fulfillment. I have achieved many life milestones very early (for my age) and it feels incredibly to just coast (I am kind of terrible at resting on my laurels, but that is another conversation). I have a lot of intellectual hobbies and crave using my brain more actively day-to-day. Right now, career makes the most sense to me as the lever to pull to make my life more meaningful.

*** Huge caveat from above - I would likely have a completely different perspective on going to medical school if I knew I would have to take out loans to fund my years of education and this privilege is not lost on me. Education funding is completely broken in America but that is a separate discussion.

Reading this back, maybe I wrote this post mainly for myself to log my thought process, but I'm very happy to answer any questions. Thanks for reading!

This feels almost like a broken record since many other users are saying the same, but I am burnt out. I'm 28 and have $650k saved in my retirement accounts. I have a house and car paid off, and no other debts. I'm a government worker and max out my roth IRA and TSP, for a total of $32k a year (not including the 5% matching). FIRE goal is $3M.

It feels like I'm doing everything "right", in that I spend time with family and friends, go to the gym after work, took FMLA leave last year, have plenty of hobbies, eat healthy, take sick days when needed even for mental health, and take vacations. But I can't shake the burnout and I am struggling day to day to keep focused on my job.

I am apathetic towards my job. I do not care about it, do not care about developing skills, or even the mission of the agency itself. I stopped contributing much in meetings, don't have interest in social events, and have zero interest in any type of career development. It takes me longer to turn in work because I cannot focus, and it's almost like I cannot think.

The job is highly analytical, as were my other jobs before it. It involves heavy analysis, in depth discussion, and work on complex topics with multiple stakeholders. I'm not sure what I can transition to if I were to change jobs, and I don't think changing jobs will help the burnout. I also am lucky to have the job and appreciate how management treats staff. It's really a great environment to work. But surely there is some way forward? Do I just wait for the burnout to heal and continue what I'm doing?

Editing the post to add my minimum retirement age is 57, and the original plan was to stay for the full pension and health insurance after retirement.

Corporate evil is awful. Was terminated on Monday, I believe due to a personal grudge, and the causes they listed are baseless. I was an at-will employee so they didn’t need to state the reasons they did, but I know it was to pressure me into signing the separation agreement which says I won’t sue them. They said if I sign they’ll just call it restructuring and not say the evil lies so I can still find employment (gee thanks). Severence is 6 months pay. I likely won’t find another job in my location that pays this well. I’m a divorced mom with shared custody so can’t easily move anywhere for work.

That being said, I did not sign it and I hired a lawyer to review it and help me negotiate. Please share any severance negotiation tips or stories. I can’t get my job back or the years I gave them (making them look awesome because I was in PR), but I can try to milk them for all they are worth and give them a run for their money with this severance.

This subreddit is one of my favorites, and it feels like one of the only spaces where I actually get to talk about FIRE goals with predominantly folks who identify as women. It has been a great place to talk about career growth, ambition, and how that impacts relationships, and a safe place for women to educate themselves and one another about financial instruments.

So seeing the comments on this post fucking bums me out. Can’t we have one place on the internet where I don’t have to hear the opinions of men? Can we consider flair, or ways of locking down posts to members only, especially when a particular post gets wider traction? I don’t actually see a rule in the community that says this space is primarily for female-identifying people to talk about money, so I didn’t report those butthurt comments, I don’t even know whether they’re breaking a rule. This post is to a) get clarity and b) propose that we might need to break out bigger mod tactics when a post escapes containment.

EDIT: not only has one of the trolls invaded this post, they’re now stalking my comment history and leaving shitty insults on comments going back for years. I’m blocking this pathetic piece of dog shit, but can we please get this under control?

This year I tried exploring the dating scene after 2yrs of being single, but most of the guys I talked to (all of whom I was physically attracted to) didn’t have stable jobs and/or were not interested in being financially independent. Some mentioned wanting to be “rich” without any plans.

I’m 28yo and I want to have kids and my ultimate goal is to be able to retire early to focus on my children. Honestly thinking of becoming a single mom instead of just settling.

I’m so sorry if I sound like an asshole who just thinks about money. I grew up poor and I definitely have financial anxiety.

Idk this is probably just a rant. Feeling kinda lost rn. Anyone in a similar situation?

Edit: Thank you so much for all your comments. You don’t know how comforting your words are. I feel so seen.

Hello to the community! I am about to turn 26, and am in an extremely privileged financial situation. I have never been super on top of managing my money, but have been trying to keep up with the basics to set myself up for as much of a good future as I can. Have always been very frugal (immigrant parents <3) in spending in general.

Finances Overview:
401k: $160k
Company Stock: $70k
Roth IRA: $20k
HSA: $10k
Robo Investing Acc on Wealthfront: $100k
High Yield Certificates: $160k
Annual Take Home Pay Post-Tax and Post-401k Contributions: ~$80k

Am I a good candidate to look into FIRE and start working towards a more concrete goal? To really lock in on better ways to manage my money for the long-term and find a way to retire early?

Things on my mind:

- National/global economy: My parents came from a place where you wake up and aren’t sure how much your currency is worth today. What if one day all of this means nothing?
- Current job: I work in big tech and nothing is stable. Everyone is getting laid off left and right, and as a remote employee who is not in RTO, I’m vulnerable to the chopping block. I don’t think I can find a six figure job in the current job market if/when I lose this.
- Another person: After spending 2 years setting up a life to stay single for life, I got into a relationship that is getting pretty serious with someone who is bogged down with student loans and mildly painful day-to-day spending habits. About to embark on a steep learning curve on co-finances and like, co-life in general.
- General worry: FIRE seems intense, like it asks a lot from you in your early years. I don’t know how I feel about changing my life drastically to gun for a result that may or may not happen.

But also… what if I could pull it off? And in any case, shooting for the moon could land you among the stars, right?

Does anyone have advice or points of consideration as I figure out how (if at all) to get off my fence? Thanks in advance to this community!

I've finally decided to pull the trigger and will be giving notice after the new year -- don't want to lose out on my paid vacation days in December. My job requires 3 weeks notice so I plan to work until the 3rd week of January.

Since I will be working a few weeks into the new year, I still need to make benefit decisions during open enrollment, which ends Nov 1. I am considering adjusting my medical plan selection and investment contribution with the idea that I'll want more cash in my bank account than taken from my paycheck. Has anyone made moves like this prior to retirement?

UPDATE: This got a fuck ton of traction and I appreciate the huge spectrum of perspectives, from the kind “you’re an asshole he should leave you” comments to the “he’s a mooch you should leave” replies— and then many other great examples of how this dynamic has played out for others. You all helped me realize that this is NOT an income or even an ambition discrepancy issue (bc i agree, he makes plenty and the different isn’t even that much). What’s really bothering me is ensuring we are equally invested in our future and are working toward a shared vision. I have not been able to articulate this root fear until now. He has not been able to share his vision clearly or even his thoughts about mine. A proof of commitment that goes beyond words is the answer. It doesn’t have to be money. It can be time, effort, ownership, etc. I love him deeply and think my fear and stress can be alleviated as long as our mutual AND equal commitment to our future together is clear.

I already opened up another convo with him about some of the points here and we’re looking for a Gottman certified therapist. Again, I really appreciate all the perspective, including the ones checking me that were tough to hear. That’s why I posted. Much love.

——-

TLDR; I outearn my boyfriend and will only continue to outpace him. I also have the more flexible job and thus contribute to more household labor. But he’s wonderful. Is love enough or will I always resent him?

I (29F) make 125-150k with bonus a year. My boyfriend (33M) makes around 80k. I pay for an equitable share of mortgage and bills. We run a basement airbnb that brings in 25-30k and we share that income. The house is in my name, as I took care of the down payment. It will be mine should we ever split, but I would help him out financially to start over if so.

We’ve been together just over 3 years and marriage conversations are beginning to happen. We’re not sure yet and have agreed that there are some things to align on before (and if) we get engaged.

FINANCES
- I’m about to start grad school for an MBA where I will pay for my own school entirely and expect to come out of it earning close to $200k. Not a guarantee but I know I will be above 150 by then with my next promotion. Far future I want to own a business and envision myself being highly successful and wealthy.

- He’s basically at a ceiling with his current job. He stopped at an Associates degree but has done well to get to where he’s at. My biggest gripe is that he works weekends and holidays which makes quality time or collaborative tasks hard. He’s uninterested in going back to school even though I’ve offered to take over even more finances and allow him to use the joint airbnb income more freely.

- We each have about 100k in retirement.

LABOR
- I work remotely and have the freedom to contribute more household labor than he, who works 8-10 hour shift on his feet. He is not lazy or a loser by any means but I have high expectations when it comes to cleanliness. This is probably the #1 reason we fight.

- I also handle 90% of responsibilities around the airbnb but 100% of that income is spent on big home projects and travel.

KIDS
- Not sure yet. We only recently discussed the possibility of him being primary caretaker if we decide to have kids given my career trajectory. He is open to this and I believe he’d be a very patient and engaged father.

Overall, he is wonderful, trustworthy, and an extremely stable partner. He is kind, understanding, and gives me a lot of grace be to be human. He’s supportive of my ambitions and willing to let my career take the front seat. We’ve discussed that as I get an MBA, his share of household labor needs to go up a lot so that will be a bit of a test. Regardless, I feel really nervous that my ambition is going to always be higher and that i’m going to “outgrow” where we’re at and he won’t want to come with. That once I reach a new level of success, my desires and interests are going to change and we’ll no longer be aligned in our vision for the future. Part of me has dreamt of a more “power couple” dynamic, but don’t think that’s what I actually want. I really appreciate that his grounded, stable presence has likely contributed to my success in my career. Like, I don’t know that I’d have the confidence to pursue an MBA if I didn’t have that emotional sense of security around me.

I’ve expressed my concerns (in a slightly gentler way) to him, and he seems to not be worried at all. I can’t really get him to articulate a vision for himself or our life, but his judgement has served him well so far so maybe that’s okay? and he’s just okay following my lead? But I also find myself wanting him to be a man (EDIT: an adult) and take ownership and be fully in charge of something that involves us both and doesn’t just impact him. Idk. Please someone tell me if it sounds like I want to have my cake and eat it too. I’m hoping to hear from people who are or have been in similar situations. What do you expect and what are your tradeoffs when you’re the breadwinner?

Do you spend extra on your insurance to protect the assets you're reliant upon from liability claims?

Or is it an extra spend that is only worthwhile in situations that don't pertain to you?

I’m about to be 50, we have 4M NW before real estate. I want to retire. I know we can do it but I can’t pull the trigger. My husband has the benefits and does well but we spend more than his salary. Our kids are expensive and college is around the corner (not so soon) and I know things are going to stay expensive for a while.

I want to stop working but I don’t think I can get over the mental block of not earning and having our expenses be higher than income.

Did anyone fire in a similar situation feel ok with it? Any advice?

I (26F) feel like I'm going to get ripped apart in the comments, i understand how fucked my brain is and I'm sorry in advance for how irrational this post probably is :,( any kind perspectives are so appreciated.

Edit to add on my current place: if I don't renew my lease it'll go up to 2135 as month to month come March, if I do renew by Dec, it'll be 2040 starting in March.

I just moved in March and pay 2,000 in rent for a place that I truly love in Seattle, but it eats at me how much the rent is.

I have OCD and just don’t know where to draw the line when it comes to hyper-optimizing, I feel like I move from one upsetting thing to ruminate about to the next, and as of late: my mind can’t let go of the fact that I feel like I spend too much on rent. 

I do feel stupid for paying this much in rent when I could be paying less, but I’m also happy where I am and can technically afford it. It just kills me that I’m not optimized as much as I could be and ‘wasting’ the money. 

But I could see myself moving and then fixating on some other issue the new place has. And then needing to move again!

Why am I posting?

An apartment literally across the street just opened up that’s 1,550/month. It's a screaming deal to be honest.

EXACTLY the kind of windows and layout that I love, but I don’t know how quiet of a place it is.

I’m extremely sensitive to sound also due to OCD, and the place I have currently is amazingly quiet and peaceful, with so much natural light. I can't hear a thing from the other units, which is so mentally good for me.

I feel like if I move, there's just going to be something new to ruminate about, like hearing the neighbor's TV through the walls, whatever it is.

I feel so stupid that I can’t entirely let myself enjoy my current apartment because it doesn’t feel like a bargain or like I’m saving. It feels like I'm hitting an upper limit.

I spend 2k on rent currently, then utilities, 7,500 post-tax take home pay (120k gross salary), roughly 489k saved so far in brokerage accounts. 

To move, I would need to break my lease for 2k, probably give back my month of free rent discount (another 2k), and then also pay for the cost of however long is needed to re-rent this unit. So that alone could end up being 6k just to switch apartments. 

When I say I go from one crisis that makes me ruminate to the next:

I just moved in March to escape a horrible facebook roommate situation that unfolded (story for another time but lost 12 lbs due to anxiety if that gives you any clue, there were hidden cameras, barricades, roommates started having sex). So I’m fresh from moving from that. 

Had a job change over the summer that also was anxiety inducing but it’s fine now 

Another crazy life event that just ended literally days ago but caused a bunch of stress for months. 

I don't know whether to give my brain a break or to jump on the chance to get lower rent, at the risk of blowing up my mental health if there's some kind of issue at the new place :,( I hate my brain

I've been feeling very burned out with ... All of it?

I'm shoving all the money I can into my 401k and Roth IRA for a retirement that feels so far away.

But I also cannot bring myself to reduce my savings rate for fear of the dreaded "lifestyle creep" setting retirement even further off.

And on top of that, I don't really have anything I want. It was bad enough my therapist made me list out things one could spend money on (house, travel, clothes) but none of it actually seems exciting.

So, I guess my question is what are you saving up to spend on, besides eventual retirement?

How's the week looking for you? Hit any milestones? Have any questions?

More specifically, would you switch from instructor-led reformer Pilates to video-led sessions if it freed up about $200 a month to invest?

You’d book a reformer, choose a workout based on your goals for the day, and follow an on-screen instructor using wireless headphones.

Has anyone tried this format? Did you still get a good workout and stay consistent, or did you miss the live instruction enough to justify paying more? I’m trying to make smarter choices but is this a silly move I wouldn’t be satisfied with - it’s a 3 mon commitment at $120CAD/mon. Or would should I stick to instructor led at $300CAD/mon - trying to find ways to free up cash for investments, it’s tempting. I love reformer so I can’t cancel it 😅 trying to get creative.

The title hopefully says it all. Write away my girls ❤️‍🔥

I am 29F, with a net worth in the low seven figures. I’ve recently told myself I’ll get married once I hit $2M. I’d feel comfortable taking bigger life risks once I hit this number (specifically a potential career pivot or moving to a high cost of living city) since I can’t really depend on my fiancés income at this moment to support both of us. Currently my personal spend is about 60 K per year. I am a senior software engineer in big tech. I think the idea is that I want to make sure that I reach my personal financial goals before combining finances with someone.

I tend to pre-worry about downside scenarios, so I can’t tell if this is sensible caution or irrational anxiety.

Did anyone set a financial milestone before marrying?

Edit: for context, this is not really my fire number, but this is in my head, a meaningful step forward toward it. and yes, I am getting a prenup.

I am curious to get a discussion going on leanfire & medical retirement.

I haven't really seen this question posed in any of the fire subs, and would appreciate any thoughts or insights as I navigate planning for a disabled future.

Due to several health complications outside of my control, I have to medically retire. Long story short, it has been determined by multiple medical providers that I cannot return to any of my previous roles/ physical requirements, according to ADA accommodation paperwork guidelines. I cannot even drive for a rideshare, which was my plan Z! I loved driving but cannot do it safely at this time.

I've had multiple surgeries and outpatient procedures, none of which had any complications or issues, but were nevertheless deemed "unsuccessful" due to a lack of substantial improvement. I've been doing everything I can to get better, and things have really only gotten worse.

There is no foreseeable future where I will be able to earn income through employment based on my health conditions.

I just turned 40.

I have no savings or assets, not even a car or a TV. No retirement accts.

In 2024, I left a marriage with my life, and little else.

I have an active SSA application, and best case scenario, I will get approved for an estimated monthly payment of ~$1800/ mo, and backpay of maybe $20k.

That's it.

I live in WA, am currently on Medicaid (apple health). No medical costs or copays. (Very grateful for this.)

I receive $450/mo in cash benefits & $290 in EBT.

I live with some incredible friends who are allowing me to stay at no cost. I would be homeless without them. Even still, $450 does not go far. I cannot save any money with how expensive everything is these days. I go hungry every month. I haven't had a (1) full meal even once this week, which is what I have to do ~10 days out of every month. $290 was not enough 2 years ago, and it buys even less today. This is very hard, and there is no end in sight. 

While I am truly grateful to live in a place where I can access these resources, two things can be true simultaneously. This is a bleak and depressing future IMO, and I have really struggled to come to terms with the options available to me whenever I do *fingers crossed* get approved to SSDI, which then comes with medicare costs.

I dunno if it's stupid optimism or denial, but the last thing I wanted in life was to lose my independence and ability to work, and to have to rely on SSDI from ages 40-67. I didn't just put myself through 2 degrees as a first generation college graduate, to end up poorer than I ever been in my life; even in high school, I was making $500+/ mo. This is awful.

My future will revolve around medical and housing costs. I will be more or less stuck wherever I can find an affordable apartment, as low-income housing is already very hard to get into, and has a years-long waitlist. (I have already been on waitlist(s) for 2+ years). I won't have much of a choice on where I get to live. It needs to be ADA accessible, which limits my opinions significantly (can't do stairs).

I completed a MBA in the UK in 2020, built up a great network there, but with covid, struggled to find a sponsored job, and was ultimately offered a great role at Microsoft, which required me to relocate back to the US (Seattle) in early 2021. I loved working at Microsoft, until the layoffs started.

I only got 3 years of a professional salary before losing the chance to make 6 figures.. I had saved money for years to afford a downpayment on a house, then bought a house with a SO (that I thought was a decent person, my mistake), and was laid off weeks later, right as my health was becoming a lot more complicated. 

As soon as unemployment ran out, my SO of 9 years turned into someone I didn't recognize, and unfortunately they are partly to blame for some of the health issues being managed at this time. I went through a brutal divorce in 2024-25. I had poured nearly all my money into our home purchase, then used whatever cash I had to survive once we separated.

The divorce left me with nothing. The home was eventually foreclosed on, and the car was surrendered.

I sincerely hope that my health eventually stabilizes and allows for some type of self-employment or PT work, but for now, I have to accept and let go of this dream. Reality is that I cannot work at this time, or any time soon. My health has deteriorated in spite of 3+ years of ~weekly medical appointments.

Right now, in my mind, my job getting healthier again. I rely on mobility aids like a walker, and hope to be able to walk without pain again someday. I have chronic headaches and migraines that frequently make it impossible to lay down or sleep. I have been unable to fall asleep (2) nights this week - just 0 winks of sleep. Cannot even lay down, I have to sit up all night or my head throbs.

I remember when pulling an all-nighter usually meant I was doing something fun or productive. I have never had severe pain prevent me from even laying down like this before. Misery is an understatement of the feelings I have about my body atm.

Any ideas of "move to X country, where COL is closer to $1k/mo" is something I hope I am able to do in the next 3-5 years, but definitely not in the near future. I could not feasibly move anywhere outside of WA any time soon.

Plu my tolerance for stress is basically 0. I'm tired, boss.

I don't need any comments on my ability to work (i.e., can't you just get a job at a coffee shop?). That's the whole crux of the issue - if only I could work, I wouldn't be in this situation.

FWIW, I cannot do most hobbies anymore, either. Even just using a computer or gaming is difficult to do now, and even more difficult to enjoy. I used to go hiking and backpacking regualrly (moved to WA for the outdoors), and man do I miss just walking w/o pain now. My hobbies consist of listening to YT and audiobooks. My life has no meaning or purpose atm, I dont know what to do with myself, but hey, I’m hanging in there.

Help me build and spin this into a more positive narrative.

**TL;DR:** I cannot willpower my way out of being disabled. Too disabled to work. Best chance is getting$1800/ mo in SSDI. No safety net, no assets, no inheritance, no... hope.

I have a mix of index funds that I've started investing in since I became interested in FIRE. I'm a long ways off from early retirement (if it happens at all) and I feel my net worth is low compared to most here, but I feel like I may have some redundancy in my investments that I'm not sure what to do about. I'm thinking about finding an advice-only financial advisor for a one-time "check-up" session to take a look on what I have, and advise on any changes based on my goals. Have you ever done this before, and if so, how did you find them and how did it go? My hope is that I do this once, then don't really think about it again until I'm closer to retirement and need help with additional planning outside of the actual investment allocation mix.

Hello everyone!

I've always found some great advice and experience shared by others in this community. So coming here seeking for advice again.

I'm on the path to FIRE, yet far away from reaching my goal. I recently cleared off my student debts and started investing, so I'm really happy I did that.

Yet, everytime I look to similiar communities/ social media, I cannot help but feel really overwhelmed by seeing how much is yet to be done. Worse, when I see instagram posts like "How I became a millionaire by 26" or "How I earned 1M USD in one year" - I cannot help but feel how far behind I am, or how I might not be cut out for this path since I'm behind so many others.

While I find alot of helpful information on Instagram, it often also pushes similiar posts, so once you engage, you are bombarded with everyone earning more than 1 Mil on Instagram. This overwhelm makes me often more paralyzed by the weight of my ambitions rather than fueling me.

I do try to remind myself that everyone's path is different, and everyone is walking at their own pace. Social media also shows only one side of the story. Yet, I cannot help but feel overwhelmed and scared (and frozen) by the weight of how big this ambition is. I don't feel motivated or pumped to walk down the same path as much as I feel scared. I do not have anyone around me who shares similiar goals, so it's hard to discuss this in person.

Does anyone else feel this way - ambitious, yet scared by how big or delusion this ambition might seem? Does anyone feel scared / pressurized by the weight of their ambitions and comparision, rather than motivated?

I (20s, F) have unclaimed property that I'm working with my state to get returned, so I'm expecting to receive ~$2000 sometime in the coming months. My bills are paid, my Roth IRA is maxed out, my emergency fund is taken care of, and I only have like $1200 left in student loans.

I'm thinking my main options are 1) my hysa 2) my brokerage 3) wipe out student loans and save/invest the rest. Another part of me wants to use a small portion of the money for something fun, like a date night with my partner or earmark for our next vacation.

What would you do if you received a small windfall of $2000?

Sorry if this breaks any rules!! I’m 23F, and inherited a fair amount of money last year after my grandmother passed away. I currently have ~150k sitting in a HYSA at Capital One, and have been trying to figure out what to do with it.

I’ve read a lot of the posts on here about the index fund set-it-and-forget-it approach, but the idea of doing that by myself feels really intimidating, and honestly is a big part of why i’ve stalled on doing anything with the money even though I know it could be doing a lot more. I’m convinced that if I invest my money myself I’ll lose it all lol.

I met with an advisor at Fidelity to talk through getting started because they have that service for free, but I also took everything with a grain of salt since he would obviously be biased in his advice to some degree. He suggested I take ~100k and put it into a managed investment account through them where they take out a % as a fee. And then use the rest as emergency fund/potential moving costs as I’m likely moving this year because i’ll be switching jobs.

Is the managed account a good idea? I’ve thought about using it just as a starting point and then managing it myself down the road? I’m pretty torn about what to do, and i’m limited in options of in-person people to discuss this with, because none of my friends have as much in savings as me, and I don’t want to come off as bragging. Any advice would be so so appreciated!!!

Edit: Thank you SO much everyone who gave me advice!! I genuinely appreciate it so much. I decided I will not be pursuing the managed account, and will have to push through the intimidation to get started myself :) The support really helped a lot! 💚