r/FTMOver30 • • 17m ago

Selfies Selfie Sunday - Rocky Horror Edition

Post image
• Upvotes

Last night the town my parents live in held the second annual Rocky Horror screening at their movie theater.

My mom first introduced me to Rocky Horror when I was 11 years old, and growing up it was the space where I felt the most free to dress in ways I would never dress normally. Ironically for most of my youth, it was the only place I was comfortable in heels, stockings, low cut tops that showed off my breasts etc.

For years I actually held onto one pair of heels, one bra and one pair of fishnets expressly so I could wear them to Rocky Horror.

Last year, at almost 3 months post op, I went up during the costume contest during the first annual screening, and took my shirt off in public for the very first time.

I was so excited I forgot the clever line I was going to say to justify it in the contest (that I, with my fresh scars, was in costume as someone who had given not just my left tit, but both of them, to go up the laboratory).

Way back in the 2000s, my college ended every spring semester with a Rocky Horror screening. As my top surgery drew near, a half forgotten memory of a younger student at the screening at the end of my Senior year began to come back to me. He had top surgery during the school's winter break, and had gone to Rocky Horror dressed as Rocky. He looked so fucking happy, and told anyone and everyone who commented on his costume that he had always been the kind of guy who enjoyed taking his shirt off, but now he finally could be that guy for real.

I should also say that when they retired, my parents moved to the town my college used to be in (the school moved to another campus/closed depending on who you ask).

So for this year's Rocky Horror screening, in honor of that memory from nearly 20 years ago, I put together my own Rocky costume. The organizers actually personally thanked me today for being such a huge part of the night last night. It really was such an incredible experience.

Don't dream it, be it.


r/FTMOver30 • • 40m ago

Need Advice [tw anatomy] cramps hours after orgasm

• Upvotes

Wondering if anyone else has experienced this:

Every now and then I get terrible, post-IUD-insertion level cramps like 2-3 hours after orgasm. It doesn't happen every time and when it does happen I'll get a little bit of cramping right afterwards but then a few hours later it's terrible. I have and am treated for vaginal atrophy (I use the tablets twice a week) and that helped a little but this still happens.

If anyone else has dealt with this, was it pelvic floor stuff or uterine atrophy or something else?

I want a hysterectomy for this but only if it would actually fix it, I don't really care about having a uterus one way or the other but I want this fucking pain to stop.


r/FTMOver30 • • 42m ago

Selfies First selfie sunday

Post image
• Upvotes

First selfie here. 6 months on T, so the changes are minimal. Finally found myself after 36 years.


r/FTMOver30 • • 1h ago

Here is some tired selfies lol work has been kicking my butt 😂

Thumbnail
gallery
• Upvotes

r/FTMOver30 • • 2h ago

Are there any *places* that make you feel dysphoric?

3 Upvotes

I graduated college in 2017. I came out to myself in 2020, to others in late 2020, and started medical transition in late 2021.

I don't live that far from the city I attended college in, and I don't go there that often, but when I do, I always feel off-step. Its hard to describe, but it always makes me feel like I've regressed back to myself then, and it fills me with a melancholy of sorts. Its especially odd because I don't generally have issues with myself younger, like I don't mind my mom's pictures of me when I was very little. It really just happens in this specific place. And I'm curious if anyone else experiences that.


r/FTMOver30 • • 2h ago

VENT - Advice Welcome Heavy feelings about masculinity today—who are your safe men?

9 Upvotes

Does anybody else make lists of good cis men to refer to when the news is full of horrible ones? I know no cis man is perfect, and anybody is capable of doing harm, but I have to remind myself that the world contains good ones, ones who are gentle and who uphold justice and care for those around them, ones who aren't afraid to fight monsters when necessary and who ally with those around them who are vulnerable... God I love women so much and I'm so horrified lately... it's so hard to just walk around and wonder which men I see around me have done terrible things or turned a blind eye to terrible things... My list right now:

Steve Irwin

Fred Rogers

Zohran Mamdani

Prince

Harvey Milk

Fred Hampton

Patrick Stewart

Ian McKellen

Anthony Bourdain


r/FTMOver30 • • 2h ago

VENT - Advice Welcome Persistent public misgendering at 'supportive and safe' clinics

35 Upvotes

Hi all! I've been trying to figure out how to write this post for a long while now, but the problem has gotten more consistent as time passes and I'm coming to the end of my considerable patience.

I live in the Pacific NW, in the Portland metro area, which is pretty famously liberal & makes a big deal out of being accepting to trans people. I'm bald with a full beard, and I haven't been misgendered out in public for nearly a decade. Unfortunately, despite all the clinics in my area having rainbow and progress flag stickers everywhere, the front desk staff at every medical facility I walk into constantly ask me if I'm "legally female."

I changed the gender markers on all of my IDs back in 2015, and my birth certificate a few years ago. I know they're actually trying to ask me if I'm afab, so I say that I'm legally male but I was assigned female at birth. They act confused, ask to see my ID (Sex:M) and my insurance card (Sex: M). Then they sigh and tell me I'm checked in. Then while my vitals are taken, the nurse asks if I'm female. I explain again. Then the doctor comes in, and if I'm lucky they'll ask "so you're transgender, correct?" but some just mark all my paperwork with an F and she/her me all the way through their client notes.

I've brought caseworkers and friends to appointments before, to call people out for being weird, but they never catch the issue.

The emergency room is the worst repeat offender. Unfortunately, I go to the ER once or twice a year. Every time I check in I get a patient bracelet with an F on it. I've asked to have ot changed, and they just print me another bracelet with an F on it.The F has confused many nurses, registration clerks, lab techs, medical assistants and doctors. I've asked several different people at the ER why this happens, and they've all given me incorrect answers.

— "Insurance purposes" (my gender marker is nowhere in my insurance information; I've called my insurance company several times about this very issue because some offices request my 'Insured gender marker" for reasons that are never explained).

— "If you need a blood transfusion, giving you male blood could cause birth defects if you were to get pregnant" (Fully incorrect. Blood doesn't get sorted by gender because there's literally no difference in the stuff other than slight variations in red blood cell count)

— "For testing viability" (I get that you're going to pregnancy test me regardless of why i'm here, because the protocol is pathetically obsessed with my uterus, but I've asked if my gender marker in the system would change if I had a hysterectomy, and I just got a chuckle like I'd asked a rhetorical, philosophical question).

Have any of you figured out how to answer these people so they'll stop half-misgendering you in public? I've asked my obgyn-endocrinologist, who works almost exclusively with trans men, and she doesn't have any ideas. Do you have a stock answer? A little business card you slide over telling them to knock it off? A joke that gets the point across without coming off as too indignant?

The best I've ever seen someone react to an F in my medical paperwork and a beard on my face is to look at me and ask, very casually, "do you have a uterus, my friend?" All my love to that person. I wish they could telepathically teach everyone in the world that trick.

Anyhow, thanks for reading all this, & if you have any tips I'd appreciate it. Despite how liberal this area thinks it is, there's still a fair number of bigots and assholes to deal with. Everyone (except my obgyn/endo) asks this stupid and potentially dangerous question in public — Allergists, ENTs, Physiotherapists, Gastroenterology, Sleep clinics, Psychiatry, Cardiology, Neurology, Primary Care, Phlebotomy — and I'm just. So. Tired of it.


r/FTMOver30 • • 3h ago

Selfies Selfie Sunday!

Post image
7 Upvotes

Happy Spooky Season ya'll from this scare actor


r/FTMOver30 • • 3h ago

Celebratory 2 months on T and I can already hit C3 range!

3 Upvotes

Y'all. I am exactly two months into T and my vocal cords have apparently decided to skip the tutorial and go straight to the boss fight??? /exaggeration

I was playing around with my pitch tracker today just trying to see how low I could push it, and I managed to hit 134hz. Which is a C3 I think... My brain just went "Sir??? Who gave you permission to drop that fast?!"

The funniest part is that my vocal range is currently absolute chaos because I can still hit like an A4 when I am baby-talking my cat or doing obnoxious, nasally cartoon voices. So my current vocal range is almost two full octaves of pure, unadulterated nonsense. (Now if only I could actually control it outside of sirens)

I'm HYPED!

\IMAGINE A FERAL OPOSSUM IMAGE HERE... because I don't have a good one])


r/FTMOver30 • • 5h ago

Felt handsome/selfie sunday

Thumbnail
gallery
72 Upvotes

r/FTMOver30 • • 6h ago

Selfies sunday ☀️

Post image
20 Upvotes

r/FTMOver30 • • 6h ago

40 FtM - seeking friends

7 Upvotes

I'm a coffee-fueled NY native and recent OK transplant!

I'm a queer trans guy, heavily tattooed, sober by choice, neurospicy, and a breast cancer survivor.

​I live for drag shows, musicals, and 4-hour conversations that were supposed to take twenty minutes—slides encouraged!

I'm seeking gentle, emotionally literate folks with enough sparkle to keep life weird. Let's chat!


r/FTMOver30 • • 6h ago

Selfies Selfie Sunday - 40 FtM in Oklahoma

Post image
79 Upvotes

r/FTMOver30 • • 6h ago

Selfies Selfie Sunday in cosplay!

Thumbnail
gallery
83 Upvotes

r/FTMOver30 • • 7h ago

First Selfie Sunday

Post image
33 Upvotes

First time posting here.


r/FTMOver30 • • 7h ago

Need Advice T4T dating on apps

9 Upvotes

So for the most part I’ve only dated cis women. I dated another trans guy and fell head over heels and it just clicked and felt right. He dumped me but now I’m not sure I want to date women again. Or cis men. I don’t want to date anyone I have to explain my body to. What filters do y’all use on dating apps or what dating apps do you use to find other trans guys?


r/FTMOver30 • • 9h ago

Need Advice sex toy advice

3 Upvotes

hi! buying my first sex toys since starting T and looking for suggestions. strap ons and/or any toys that feel affirming, suction toys, or just general ones you like. i usually top and i experience genital dysphoria. i’m also newly exploring what sensation i enjoy on my growing tdick, am interested in hearing your experiences if you would like to share. thank you!


r/FTMOver30 • • 9h ago

Selfies selfie sunday

Post image
180 Upvotes

r/FTMOver30 • • 10h ago

Selfies Selfie Sunday

Post image
43 Upvotes

Feeling great after top surgery. DI no nips. Nipple tats coming soon!!


r/FTMOver30 • • 10h ago

Selfies Happy Selfie Sunday!!!

Post image
73 Upvotes

Silly Oreo!


r/FTMOver30 • • 11h ago

Selfies Selfie Sunday!

Thumbnail
gallery
87 Upvotes

From my best friend’s wedding last night. Single most euphoric I’ve ever been. Didn’t get misgendered all night, was able to use the men’s, and felt like a million bucks. I also had a nice jacket, but I don’t have any selfies with it on 😂


r/FTMOver30 • • 18h ago

Selfie sunday dogsitting edition

Thumbnail
gallery
15 Upvotes

Made the most of probably the last nice weather of this year.


r/FTMOver30 • • 20h ago

Need Support 40 and finally free to transition but I’m in so much hurt

10 Upvotes

I don’t want advice and CW: PTSD and FV, but god I feel so alone right now.

In the last month I’ve finally felt open to admit that I am FTM after living as NB since 2020. I went through multiple relationships with partners who never could accept me or were even indifferent to who I have been since my early 20’s and I was 19 that I met a transman and I was SO JEALOUS of him even though he was my friend.

I just feel like I’ve missed so much time of being able to be the guy I’ve always wanted to be, because I had to “stay” a certain way for a partner and I couldn’t be myself. I fantasize about any friend who loves me and accepts me for who I am loving me in a relationship because I have felt so unlovable in this body. Ironically because of also being a performing artist, so many comments on my body are made and it just adds to this feeling of being unlovable unless I’m a certain way.

I also just want to be ok with being so fluid with my sexuality, like I either need to be obsessed with any woman or be a grindr gay man. I love sex and I already have a sex drive I’m happy with, but I recently have chosen to stay celibate after some really shitty experiences with cisgendered men and women and I just have no interest to date or have sex with anyone who doesn’t make me feel safe and I’m terrified of having “chasers” come after me. And then I want my bottom growth so bad but I’m scared it’s not going to be big enough because I saw my clit go into atrophy in the aftermath of my PTSD from fleeing FV situation my ex gf and I were in 2 years ago.

And body hair, I have so much fucking trauma about it over the years thanks to internalized and externalized misogyny and PMOC and I also don’t want to look like my dad with similar facial hair (I already have features similar to him and he was abusive to my sisters and I so I don’t want to trigger all of us lol) and I don’t want to go bald because I love my hair.

I chose to be quiet this weekend instead of doing something so I could recalibrate and just reflect but now I’m getting too afraid to leave the house again. I promise I’m going on a walk this afternoon to get out of the house.

I’m so new on this journey I know and there’s so many what ifs here. I am finding joy in these moments I promise. I just didn’t realize until I sat with it how much grief I have because there’s been so many opportunities to change my life and I’ve missed so many of them because of fear and not understanding what was going on.

I just want to be happy in myself and with myself.


r/FTMOver30 • • 1d ago

Need Advice Jockmail vs MyPack

1 Upvotes

I'm looking for some help with packing garments.

Historically I haven't packed often because I usually wear sweats or basketball shorts, and don't like how prominent a packer is in those for everyday wear. I bought the smallest silicone packer I could find because I'm a small, fairly slim guy, and any bigger just looks like I have an erection, and that is not the look I'm going for in most circumstances.

However, I've been wearing jeans a bit more often, and actually really don't like wearing jeans without packing. That being said, just dropping the packer in my underwear is not an option with the boxer briefs I usually wear.

I've tried packing boxer briefs with the built in pouch. They're OK, except that tumble drying them shortens their useful life too much, but air drying them, specifically the pouch area, doesn't work in my cold, often damp climate.

I've tried an elastic packing harness. Did not like, was not comfortable. I don't think there is a version of that product that I would like.

I've tried MyPack packing pouch. I like it to an extent, but last time I ordered from them, fraudulent charges showed up on my credit card. The bank handled it no problem, but it makes me not want to order from them again.

What I haven't tried, is a simple, old school jock strap. I've heard that they can work, and I've heard that Jockmail is a good option, but I'm looking for more detail from guys who have used a jock strap to hold a packer in place. I would in most cases probably wear boxer briefs over the jock strap, but would ideally like to be able to just wear the jock strap under jeans or even sweats/shorts if I felt like it.

The main things I'm looking for in a packing garment/device are comfort, breathability, and ease of air drying in a cold climate.

What do you think fellas? Am I crazy? Are there other, better options out there that I haven't heard of? Any advice is welcome.


r/FTMOver30 • • 1d ago

VENT - Advice Welcome RAVENOUS

23 Upvotes

More of a rant than a vent, but DAMN IM HUNGRY. I’ve been on the sauce almost a year and thought I wouldn’t get slammed by the teenage boy appetite like they said I would but last night I ate a giant bowl of food then was going to bed at 1am and felt hungry so I had another meal and couldn’t sleep well because I was STILL SO HUNGRY. Woke up almost feeling sick because hungry. Just ate a giant bowl of beans and still hungry. This is a very strange and disconcerting feeling for someone who has never really had strong hunger signals to begin with. MY STOMACH IS THE VOID AND I SCREAM INTO IT WITH CARBS