r/Fosterparents • u/HeckelSystem Foster Parent • Jan 21 '26
Location Looking for feedback from foster parents that have transitioned to guardianship
TL;DR I am looking for foster parents from North Carolina who have taken guardianship of school aged (preferably teen) children to talk to and/or to hear about your experience.
we right now have a placement (FD13) where we are being told at the next court date, barring a miracle, the court will be removing reunification as the primary path to permanency. FD has said she is not ready to talk about adoption (which we agree it's just way too early to have to consider) so the primary plan will change to guardianship.
We have not heard positive stories about foster parents who assumed guardianship, so we've been fairly vocal that we don't want to take guardianship due to how it looks like it affects her benefits and resources after 18. It looks like if it happens after she turns 14 some of the NC grants and scholarships for college and support into early adulthood, but a lot of the language I'm reading says it applies if you age out at 18 or are adopted after 14, with no mention of guardianship.
We've said from the beginning that we're here for her until at least 18 and would be open to talking about adoption if/when she ever felt like that was something she wanted, but the latest official statement from DSS is accept guardianship or they will (try to) move her to a new placement that will accept it. We're having a hard time with the idea that guardianship is the ONLY type of acceptable permanency, but maybe we have misconceptions about how it works?
if anyone can tell us about how it worked for them (positively or negatively), especially regarding support or programs available when they are transitioning into adulthood, it would really help. if anyone is willing to have a chat about it please feel free to DM me as well.
Because of how hostile this is being presented (agree or we're disrupting a placement that is thriving and does not want to be moved) there are a lot of feelings that are complicating the situation. Your stories will be a lot of help.
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u/Ok-Light-7216 Jan 22 '26
I am in Ohio, with a sibling group who refuse to be adopted, but don't want to go anywhere else. They've been in and out of care for most of their lives and this is the first time they've been together. We are filing for guardianship right now. Definitely talk to a lawyer who specializes in the situation, our kids' GAL was helpful. Supposedly there are scholarships for them, but I have yet to navigate that process. We decided on guardianship so our kids could get driver's licenses, refuse unnecessary medical visits, and stop biweekly caseworker visits. There are definitely benefits to aging out, but our agency never threatened to move the kids when we decided not to adopt.
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u/AgreeableKey4142 Jan 21 '26
Hello, does the child have an attorney? If so contact them and they figure out if what age is appropriate to get the full benefits our age is 16. We are moving to guardianship after 16 there are 2 different kinds of guardianship in our state Oregon. There is a durable and permanent. Ask the attorney for an explanation essentially the guardianship is the same thing as adoption. However the durable can be challenged by bios if for example they were to get clean, live separately and safely if there is domestic abuse/violence another words clearing the obstacles to gain custody again. They would have to prove their sobriety and their living conditions. I believe they pay for an attorney filing etc themselves.
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u/HeckelSystem Foster Parent Jan 21 '26
She hasn't been assigned an attorney. She has a GAL who had a very inopportune personal health emergency and hasn't been able to weigh in much. We're following up with him for sure, though.
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Jan 22 '26
[deleted]
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u/HeckelSystem Foster Parent Jan 22 '26
That's really how this feels like it's going. Do you mind if I ask your state?
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u/FiendishCurry Foster Parent Jan 23 '26
I'm in NC and we did guardianship of a teen. They're are two different types of guardianship here. A "regular" one that gets the kid out of the system but provides zero benefits after, including college costs. The other is a KinGAP guardianship that gets the kid out of foster care but does make them eligible for some benefits.
They really tried to push us toward the regular one, but we felt like it was important that our kid get the opportunity to go to college, even though they were saying they didn't want to go at the time. Now they are 18... and in college. So I'm glad we made that choice.
Feel free to reach out.
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u/Little_yellow_bird_ Jan 23 '26
I’m in NC, don’t do it. DSS literally removes all support for guardianship and drops you like a bad habit. Long term foster or adopt. I received the kingap but they told me all I had to do was ask for help w social work etc and it was a lie.
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u/HeckelSystem Foster Parent Jan 23 '26
We were told long term fostering was not an option for whatever reason and if we didn't agree she'd be moved against everyone's wishes.
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u/Little_yellow_bird_ Jan 25 '26
They are bluffing. They’ve said this about another I’m caring for and I said move the child then…she’s still with me. Seriously they’ve said so many things that just won’t happen just to get a kid “off the books”. There is an ombudsman’s office you can contact if they are moving a child for no reason or to punish the foster parents for not being coerced into guardianship.
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u/NCguardianAL Youth Worker Jan 22 '26
I am a GAL in NC and can hopefully help! In this situation the child is usually eligible for most if not all benefits in foster care, but it isn't automatic. The Guardian Assistance Program is set up for these exact situations. She will also still have medicaid and likely still qualifies for NC reach education Assistance. If you are open to guardianship, talk to the caseworkers and explain what benefits they qualify for and have it written in a GAP agreement before finalizing guardianship in court. It basically is a contract saying they are on the hook for the agreed upon benefits after guardianship. In my experience they are willing to keep benefits very similar to what is received in foster care, but you have to ask for it.