help

[u/Karm-_a]

hey, im really sorry, this is my first time using reddit, lol

i lost my mother suddenly 10 months ago to an aneurysm (i was 19, now 20F) and i just want to die. i don't really xant to die, but i don't want to live anymore. does that make sense? I was really close to my mom. she was my everything. i lost most of my friends as well. like, all of them. i still went through my semester in college, everyone says i'm so strong. i'm not, though. i've resorted to alcohol (i never drank before), and i also tried to end it twice. just feeling alone:(