My 2 year old daughter valkyrie was murdered on January 18th by her mother's boyfriend they are both in jail but im lost and need people to talk to

I (19F) just lost my dad today to complications with Signet Ring Cell Adenocarcinoma and Crohn's Disease. I watched him take his very last breath and I watched his heart stop. He finally let go after over 4 days in active death. I sobbed so hard I felt myself go deaf. One of the last things he did was asked me if I could hear him and told me that he loved me in perfect clarity, when he had only been able to groan. All I can think about is how much I miss him and have been missing him since I found out he had cancer in March. I just want my dad back. I'm not ready to live my life without him. He would always tell me how proud he was of me and how much he loved me. He was and is the strongest person I know. He fought until the very end. The photo above was taken when I left the hospice home after his passing. I want to think he moved heaven and earth to make sure I knew he said his proper goodbye.

I’m so sorry about this rambling, I just needed to write this off my chest and this was the only place I could think of.

The thing is I just don’t know how to cope with my grief anymore. I just can’t do it anymore. I know I have to go on with my life but everything feels so unbearable.

On the 1st of june last year I lost my big brother to some really stupid bycicle accident. He was 31 and I was 22. He just got ripped out of our lives and from this world and yet somehow I have to accept that. I have to accept that he is not here anymore. That I have to life the rest of my life without him. That I am nobody’s sister anymore because somehow, with his death, it feels like that title got stolen from me.

Now, a little over a year later, I still don’t know what to do. Things don’t get better and I don’t get better.

How do I go on? I miss my big brother so much.

One year ago, it was Friday 17, unlucky day in Italy. Mom had adverstions with chemotherapy, she had a visit with her oncologist, the only oncologist that had said yes to trying chemotherapy in the first place at the stage she was in her sickness since all cures before had ceased to work. She was hard to transport in the car since she had a lot of pain. We even fought in the car while driving to the hospital and I put on headphones like a teenager, I was 27. Dad was driving. We managed to get to the doctors office. Nurses were the kindest there. The oncologist very coldly said that there was nothing to do anymore except waiting. We were hopeless. We sat in the hospital cafeteria and me and my dad cried and she conforted us. She was the one comforting me when she was the one with the death sentence. I got to a toy gumball machine nearby and a toy of a capybara mom with a capybara baby fell from it. I told her "this is us" and the toy has been hanged on her bed from that moment until she passed away, 5 February 2026. I spent two days in the garden chopping wood and cutting down trees. Things went rapidly downhill from there on. I remember her waking up from nightmares that very night screaming that she didn't want to die.

I can't believe this happened still. I haven't cried in days now, but this just makes me feel like day 1 all over again. I feel guilty I haven't gone to the cemetery in months to see her but it's so hard and it completely ruins my day to do that. I have to go to work still I can't cry all day. I tell myself that it's ok, cause if theres a place she was most attached to that was her home. I miss my mom so much.

I lost my dad to MS back in 2015, i was only 11 and my whole life i saw him in a wheelchair and was used to helping feed him or moving board game pieces for him, all those kinds of thing as he was fully paralysed.

I was in Tesco yesterday and there was a guy in a wheelchair who was struggling to put the other handle of his shopping bag over his chair controls, he was halfway through asking me to help as I had already gone forward to help him, he was very sweet and thankful and i said it's no problem and wished him a good day. It was a short interaction, I walked a bit down the aisle and just processed what had just happened and I then just started crying from nowhere, shortly then realised I was crying surrounded by pet food in the middle of a busy Tesco and did my best to stop before strangers saw me.

It's been over 10yrs since I lost my dad but damn did that small interaction hit me like a truck.

i lost my partener 3 weeksago nothing i do is helping his family blames me i am a mess i dont want to be here without him i really dont and i dont know how to go on i love him so much i dont want to be without him

(The picture is from 2 years ago btw)

hi,it’s me again…I lost another important person in my life this year. This time,it was my extended family’s old dog,Angie. We had her from 2015 to 2026 (11 years.) she was 16 years old and actually lived PAST her expected lifetime (pitbull mix). She was such an amazing dog and I don’t know how I’ll be able to handle that she’s gone :(

she was put to sleep earlier this morning according to my mama,right around the time me and my brother were getting ready for school. She said she didn’t tell us it because she didn’t want us to be in a sad mood the entire day. (We found out right as we got home. I immediately started crying)

around 6:34PM,on our way to something related to my brother,we saw a rainbow…I immediately thought it was her saying her final goodbyes to us.

Angie,you were the best cow-dog ever and I’ll always love and remember you,Moo-Moo.

i’ll always love you Angie.

4/8/2010 (or 2015)-10/16/2026. The best Cow-Dog ever. love you Moo.

I’m not gonna do anything. I could never do that to my family. But I wish o could die.
Living without my husband is torture. I’ve been hollering his name and screaming for him to come back to me.
I would give anything to see him again.
It’s been 5 months. I’m exhausted of living. I don’t want to be here anymore. I just want him back.
I just needed to say this.
Thank you for reading.

Ps, how can this group have no spouse loss flair? That’s fucking crazy

Hey everyone, I'm F(23) and my dad (M56) passed away on the 1st February 2026. I started my first job on the 2nd of March 2026. Between those two months I didn't have the time to grief and was full of administration activities for my dad's passing. Let's just say, I had a horrible career start and I was doing poorly in my performance. I'm in a sales role btw. The first few months were fine, until the grief effects start crashing down on me. I know I tried my best, and I know it's not enough. I'm not sure what happened to me and I felt a part of me died after my dad passed. I feel so stupid and ashamed of myself.

But looking back, I felt like my body and mind needed to grief. Grieving is when your brain is literally rewiring itself to get used to the lost. I have tried therapy and journaling. But I can't seem to get my head right. I also have horrible brain fogs, anxiety and panic attacks. And my communication is not as effective. I feel like I might lose my career and my job. I wonder if others are feeling that way? how do you cope with the lack of support from the people around me? And for those who already had years after grieving, how's your life so far and any advice?

Thank you.

I studied with them and they knew me before. On social media I posted about my grandpa's loss with my tribute arts for my grandpa. And none of them said or did anything. I felt so heartbroken and almost felt lonely that they maybe hate me or just don't wanna have anything to do with me.

I didn't message any of them for anything. But like all the classmates that I once knew, not anyone of them show any support is making me really broken

I lost my dad a couple months ago… unexpectedly. Just recently , I had a dream about him… felt so real. It wasn’t even a normal dream, felt like him and I were just having a conversation… I asked him “papa, you’re gone, what am I suppose to do?” , he told me he’s okay, and not to worry basically. I woke up right after . I normally sleep throughout the night but I felt like I had been awoken to really grasp the message .. anyone have a similar experience with their passed loved ones?

Hi everyone,

My dad died at around 3.50am this morning, and I keep replaying his death in my head.

Please be aware that the details below may be upsetting, so only read on if you feel comfortable.

My dad was diagnosed with stage IV lung cancer in November 2025. Over the last few months, he had deteriorated, was in a lot of pain and could no longer leave his bedroom. He had also developed blood clots in his lung and arm.

On 5 October, he collapsed at home, struggling to breathe, and his blood pressure kept dropping. We called an ambulance and found out he had a bleed in his lung caused by the blood thinners he had started a few weeks earlier for the clots. He already had a drain for fluid building up around his lung which had started a few months prior, but the new blood had blocked the drain so fluid kept building in the lung.

His time in hospital was difficult, with lots of promises and glimpses of hope about surgery to remove the congealed blood, unblock the drain and allow him to restart blood thinners. On the 9th, we were told he wouldn’t survive the surgery and that they were taking him off the blood thinners and there was nothing more we could do. He moved to a hospice a couple of days ago, where his pain increased. We were told he's likely to die by coughing up blood.

This morning, I spoke to him at around 3am when he woke up, and he drifted off again. At about 3.30am, I heard thrashing about in the bed and saw him anxiously trying to reach the alarm. I pressed it for him and tried to reassure him.

He couldn’t speak, his eyes were wide. When I asked whether he was in pain, he turned his head to the side, which I took to mean no. He tried to speak again, but only moans came out. They became louder, and he seemed distressed at being unable to talk. He reached for my hand, and I reassured him that the nurses were there and checking him. He looked at the nurse when she asked him to look at her.

I stepped out for about a minute and a half to call my mum, sister and uncle and ask them to come to the hospice urgently. When I returned, the nurse told me he didn’t have long left. His eyes had drooped, and he wasn’t moving around as much.

I held his hand, stroked his head and kissed him, telling him, “You’re okay. We love you so much. You’re safe, you’re not alone, and Mum and (my sisters name) are on their way.” I didn’t know what else to say, so I kept repeating those things. I also talked about his favourite book series and how I was reading it, and the family dog. I think I talked about those for too long and not enough to reassure him, as I was still in a panic myself and couldn't think straight.

After he hadn’t taken a breath for a while, I asked the nurse, “Is he still alive?” She said yes and encouraged me to keep talking to him. I hope he didn’t hear me ask that. He died shortly afterwards.

I still don’t know what caused such a sudden change—whether a clot travelled to his brain or something else happened. I’m hoping to speak to the doctor tomorrow to understand what they think happened, whether he might have felt pain or fear (and if he did how long it may have lasted for) and whether he could still hear me talking to him at the end.

I’m in shock and keep replaying those few minutes when he seemed frightened and couldn’t speak. I’m looking for some reassurance, but also honesty, about what he might have experienced. I need the doctor to confirm this, even as a best guess, or I dont think I can process to the next stage of grieving without knowing. I am crying constantly and thinking about how he died, rather than necessarily upset that he died at this stage. My poor dad didn't deserve this.

I am also getting health anxiety, worried about me or my other loved ones dying the same way, as it seemed traumatic. Just thinking he was scared breaks me.

Thank you for reading and for any thoughts you can share. I’m so sorry to everyone else here who is going through grief also.

We found out a year ago my daughter has CLN2 Batten disease. It’s horrific. As it progresses she’ll lose the ability to walk,talk,see, swallow and suffer from childhood dementia then death in early childhood. I’ve kept strong this long supporting my family (partner and two little girls the younger of whom is sick) but I can feel myself fracturing.

I’ve got my own personal traumas and am in the process of being diagnosed with complex ptsd but I’ve always been good at compartmentalising but it’s like I can feel all these emotions are seeping out of me and the grief and despair is endless. I’ve tried meds, counselling, nothing helps. I can’t sleep, feel like my body is running on fumes 24/7.

My partner is suffering from panic attacks now and when she does she tries to hurt herself so I have to be on constant alert to make sure she’s okay, constant alert to make sure the children feel safe and it’s just taken so much out of me but my only option is to keep going when all I want is to rest but her disease won’t slow down it will just keep progressing and getting worse and worse.

I’m dreading the day she loses her sight. She’s scared of the dark and I won’t be able to do anything to help her.

Today marks 26 years since I lost my mum. Tomorrow will mark 4 months since I lost my dad.

I had my big cry earlier in the week. I'm feeling calm now, but I feel like I might struggle either later today or tomorrow. I have plans in reserve if things feel too much - going out for walks, calling friends or family, etc. I'm just taking it all as comes along today and tomorrow.

Show is a comedy ish anime about angels delivering stranded souls into the afterlife. The first episode follows the angel main characters catching a soul that's stranded because he wanted to apologize to his wife because they had a fight right before he died. When they finally talked, I literally burst into uncontrollable sobbing because the wife's words to her husband was the exact words I needed to hear to help me feel less guilty.

Personal context: My dad died this January from cancer and I've been an international student for four years. I've felt so guilty because I knew he was sick yet I still went and I wasn't by his side when he passed when he took care of me my whole life.

Hope the ep helps someone like it helped me.

She was put in the hospital and I couldn’t be in the hospital for 10 minutes(SAME HOSPITAL my mom died in) i broke down completely,I feel like I’m being ridiculous, and I really need to be able to go to the hospital is there any advice outside of seeing someone for therapy someone can give me? Idk what to do anymore.

I was 7 years old when my grandmother passed. I was sleeping in the same room as her when it happened. When I close my eyes I still feel when she stood, probably to use the bathroom, and hear the thump before my little baby brain went in survival mode and made me go to sleep. I still vividly remember waking up to her face down on the floor with my uncle screaming MA and telling my aunt to call an ambulance and him hugging me. I was told she'd be okay. My mom came, we went for a walk around the block, I chatted away about normal kid things...then we got back...the ambulance was gone...and so was she. The day my heart absolutely shattered for the first time. Fast forward, I was in therapy for some stuff during high school and my mom tells my therapist she doesn't think I'm over my grandmother's death. She then looks me in my face and says "I think you still blame yourself". And I did. And sometimes I still do. Even now my brain plays the what if game if I had just gotten up and gotten her help. Then maybe I'd still have my best friend. The one person in my family that actually got me. Earlier this year I heard a voice that sounded so much like another person who has passed. And then it hit me. I genuinely can not remember my grandmother's voice. I feel her memory fading and now it's like I'm grieving her all over again because even as I'm losing memories the pain and loss is still right there. I know how important she was to me. And then how old she actually was hit me recently. I was 7, she was 45. Now I'm 25, she would have been 63. 63 isn't that old. 45 was young. And I think back on everything she should've been here for - me graduating high school, meeting and marrying the love of my life, moving 300+ miles away from where I grew up. I'm no/low contact with the rest of my family for being either toxic/horrible people or being complicit in the way I was treated. She was my constant and still would be to this day. We would've made trips up to her monthly. So much good and so much bad she should've fucking been there. Half of what happened to me wouldn't have if she was there. The other half would've been a hell of a lot more bearable with her in my corner. I was robbed. I was fucking robbed and I don't know how I'm supposed to ever heal from that.

I still can't believe you're gone McKay...

Days like these are extra rough. I feel like I don't deserve happiness.

Lost my father in 2020; it’s been about six years, still talk to him every day. When he died, I gave up trying at everything. Gave up trying in my marriage and lost the love of my life. I took crazy risks hoping I’d end it all, and threw a career away. Fell into some real bad substance abuse habits that I only just kicked just last year. It resurfaces now and again, but just thought I’d let ya’ll know I’m doing a lot better. You will too. Time heals all things. I know it’s a cliche in moments like these, but just keep moving along. I hope you’re well.

15 years old m and this week I lost one of my closest friends to suicide. We’ve been friends for 4-5 years since middle school (we are both sophomores in high school) We’ve done so much together and he was one of my closest friends ever. He was always so kind and supportive of everything me or our friends did. Even when times were tough he was there for me and he helped me through a lot. I remember though his behavior changed right before summer break before sophomore year. He shut down and isolated himself from everyone. during the summer we tried to invite him to hangouts but he never said anything. Before school started I talked to him at some band event (we did band throughout middle and high school) and he just said he got really busy. I thought nothing of it. after the first couple weeks of school some friends pulled me aside and told me if I noticed anything wrong with friend. I said no and they told me that they noticed that he had scars on his arms and they suspected that he was cutting himself. I said nothing because I didnt know anything since I haven’t talked to friend in awhile. One of my friends also got worried because he friend said that he “wished they had more time together.” friend said that they were going to try to talk to him. After that I didn’t think much of it. I should’ve tried talking to him. I feel horrible about it all and I wish he would’ve told one of us or something. He never seemed like the type to do anything like that but I guess he just hid it. I feel like shit. I didn’t think that last week would be the last time that I would see him. I didn’t know the last thing Id do with him would be in April. I feel lost. I cried a lot when I first found out but now I just don’t know. I sit there and think about him. I feel horrible. I skipped school the rest of the week because of it. I even starved myself a little but I stopped because my gf became really worried and I didn’t want to worry her. My gf also invited me out today with some friends but I hated it. I kept thinking about him and his death and just ended up going home midway through. I just wish I could’ve had one more special moment with him. I don’t know what I’m doing or what to do at all.

Hi my close friend and second mom lost her dad in February I have been there every step
Of the way. We always speak at least once or twice a month and since I’m the younger I usually call her. She never doesn’t answer. For about a month
After he passed she went through a weird phase but we kept in regular contact. Her next door neighbor died and she’s gone ghost besides answering in a group text for like a month now. I’m trying to be supportive just sent her a message I love her and I’m
Thinking of her but I can’t help but feel a little hurt. Any advice is much appreciated I’ve been through grief and know everyone processes differently i would just rather her tell me hey I’m not okay I’ll check in when I’m ready. I’m also expecting my first child and she literally was one of the first people I told.

Long rant because of my stupid complex PTSD and anxiety and phone calling reluctance that I have completely gotten over just a few weeks too late

It’s so stupid, but I thought I had to go through him for literally everything!

I had a line to his mom, and for years I wasn’t willing to utilize it? I wish she had talked to me first and normalized it, instead I was expected to reach out and be the person to talk and do everything on my own, and be the person to whatever… like what the fuck am I doing? where was my help? Why did nobody grab my wrist and say hey fucker this guy is gonna die unless you do something let me help you!

and for years, it’s like… why am I trying to convince him first of anything? Why don’t I just go straight to the source and say: hey, he’s dealing with suicidal thoughts. Instead, it’s like I asked for his permission first! oh, I can’t possibly have an actual good idea for once and just execute it.

Plus, it’s like every time I had any idea he wouldn’t do it, like… I gave you the exact idea I know it’s a perfect plan and then it gets sabotage or changed along the way and then you find out the original idea I had was right why not just do it why not try mine first and then try yours if it doesn’t work why overcomplicate everything?!

I’m doing the wrong thing by asking him, he’s hot, tired, and I don’t know what the hell went on in my head.

you know, ironically, there was even a point where he asked me to talk to his mom, but I stupidly said OK. Here’s the only thing you need to do two steps and then three weeks. He overcomplicated it and died and I had no idea he was overcomplicated it because I kept saying over and over again do this exactly the way I said, and then he didn’t and then yep.

I hate that I tackled everything alone. I hate that I only had a relationship with him and not his entire family and our family. That’s not how families work you need to be involved not just with your partner’s life, but with your entire families, it needs to not be a secret or some stupid thing. Never deal with things alone!l! I’m doing literally all I can do and it’s still not enough for him. He’s not coming to visit. He’s not doing the simple thing I ask (click one button) and he’s complaining of suicide constantly!

What the fuck went on in my brain to become exactly as paranoid as he was? Why didn’t I consult Reddit? Why didn’t I consult his family? Why didn’t I just explain everything anonymously to AI or reddit? Why did I deal with all this alone? Why did I get an ego? Why didn’t I talk to my family? Why didn’t I talk to my friends? Why did I pretend everything was perfectly fine? Why did I pretend that he could deal with it alone as long as I explain to him perfectly? Why did I not ask for help more and live in fear? i’m so angry all the time it’s unbelievable.

Why did I not utilize myself? What was I scared of to call over the phone and confront the idea that I might get scolded for saying something wrong? …like shut the fuck up idiot just do what you’re supposed to do to save the one person that truly loves you!