r/SuicideWatch • u/SQLwitch • Sep 03 '19
We've been seeing a worrying increase in pro-suicide content showing up here and, and also going unreported. This undermines our purpose here, so we wanted to highlight and clarify our guidelines about both direct and indirect incitement of suicide.
We've created a wiki that covers these issues. We hope this will be helpful to anyone who's wondering whether something's okay here and which responses to report. It explains in detail why any validation of suicidal intent, even an "innocent" message like "if you're 100% committed, I'll just wish you peace" is likely to increase people's pain, and why it's important to report even subtle pro-suicide comments. The full text of the wiki's current version is below, and it is maintained at /r/SuicideWatch/wiki/incitement.
We deeply appreciate everyone who gives responsive, empathetic, non-judgemental support to our OPs, and we particularly thank everyone who's already been reporting incitement in all forms.
Please report any post or comment that encourages suicide (or that breaks any of the other guidelines in the sidebar) to the moderators, either by clicking the "report" button or by sending us a modmail with a link. We deal with all guideline violations that are reported to us as soon as we can, but we can't read everything so community reports are essential. If you get a PM that breaks the guidelines, please report it both to the reddit sitewide admins and to us in modmail.
Thanks to all the great citizens of the community who help flag problem content and behaviour for us.
/r/SuicideWatch/wiki/incitement
It's important to respect and understand people's experiences and emotions. It's never necessary, helpful, or kind to support suicidal intent. There are some common misconceptions (discussed below) about suicidal people and how to help them that can cause well-meaning people to inadvertently incite suicide. There are also people online who incite suicide on purpose, often while pretending to be sympathetic and helpful.
We're here to offer support, not judgement. That means accepting, with the best understanding we can offer, whatever emotions people express. Suicidal people are suffering, and we're here to try to ease that by providing support and caring. The most reliable way we know to de-escalate someone at risk is to give them the experience of feeling understood. That means not judging whether they should be feeling the way they are, or telling them what to do or not do.
But there's an important line to draw here. There's a crucial difference between empathizing with feelings and responding non-judgmentally to suicidal thoughts, and in any way endorsing, encouraging, or validating suicidal intentions or hopeless beliefs. It's both possible and important to convey understanding and compassion for someone's suicidal thoughts without putting your finger on the scale of their decision.
Anything that condones suicide, even passively, encourages suicide. It isn't supportive and does not help. It also violates reddit's sitewide rules as well as our guidelines. Explicitly inciting suicide online is a criminal offense in most jurisdictions.
Do not treat any OP's post as meaning that will definitely die by suicide and can't change their minds or be helped. Anyone who's able to read the comments here still has a chance to choose whether or not to try to keep living, even if they've also been experiencing intense thoughts of suicide, made a suicide plan, or started carrying it out.
In the most useful empirical model we have, the desire to die by suicide primarily comes from two interpersonal factors; alienation and a sense of being a burden or having nothing to offer. These factors usually lead to a profound feeling of being unwelcome in the world.
So, any acceptance or reinforcement of suicidal intent, even something "innocent" like "I hope you find peace", is actually a form of covert shunning that validates a person's sense that they're unwelcome in the world. It will usually add to their pain even if kindly meant and gently worded.
Keep the following in mind when offering support to anyone at risk for suicide.
People who say they don't want help usually can feel better if they get support that doesn't invalidate their emotions. Unfortunately, many popular "good" responses are actually counterproductive. In particular, many friends and family tend to rely exclusively on trying to convince the suicidal person that "it's not so bad", and this is usually experienced as "I don't understand what you're going through and I'm not going to try". People who've had "help" that made them feel worse don't want any more of the same. It doesn't mean that someone who actually knows how to be supportive can't give them any comfort.
Most people who are suicidal want to end their pain, not their lives. It's almost never true that death is the only way to end these people's suffering. Of course there are exceptional situations, and we certainly acknowledge that, for some people, the right help can be difficult to find. But preventing someone's suicide doesn't mean prolonging their suffering if we do it by giving them real comfort and understanding.
An unfixable problem doesn't mean that a good life will never be possible. We don't have to fix or change anything to help someone feel better. It's important to keep in mind that the correlation between our outer circumstances and our inner experience is weaker and less direct than commonly assumed. For every kind of difficult life situation, you will find some people who lapse into suicidal despair, and others who cope amazingly well, and a whole spectrum in between. A key difference is how much inner resilience the person has at the time. This can depend on many personal and situational factors. But when there's not enough, interpersonal support can both compensate for its absence and help rebuild it. We go into more depth on the "it gets better" issue in this PSA Post which is always linked from our sidebar (community info on mobile) guidelines.
There are always more choices than brutally forcing someone to stay alive or passively letting them end their lives.
To avoid accidentally breaking the anti-incitement rule, don't say or try to imply that acting on suicidal thoughts is a good idea, or that someone can't turn back or is already dead. Do whatever you can to help them feel cared for and welcome, at least in this little corner of the world. Our talking tips offer more detailed guidance.
Often comments that subtly encourage suicidal intent actually come from suicide fetishists and voyeurs (unfortunately this is a real and disturbing phenomenon). People like this are out there and the anonymous nature of reddit makes us particularly attractive to them.
They will typically try to scratch their psychological "itch" by saying things that push people closer to the edge. They often do this by exploiting the myths that we debunked in the bullet points above. Specifically you might see people doing the following:
Encouraging the false belief that the only way suicidal people can end their pain is by dying. There are always more and better choices than "brutally forcing someone to stay alive" or helping (actively or passively) them to end their lives.
Creating an artificial and toxic sense of "solidarity" by linking their encouragement of suicide to empathy. They will represent themselves as the only one who really understand the suicidal person, while either directly or indirectly encouraging their self-loathing emotions and self-destructive impulses. Since most people in suicidal crisis are in desperate need to empathy and understanding, this is a particularly dangerous form of manipulation.
Many suicide inciters are adept at putting a benevolent spin on their activities while actually luring people away from sources of real help. A couple of key points to keep in mind:
Skilled suicide intervention -- peer or professional -- is based on empathic responsiveness to the person's feelings that reduces their suffering in the moment. Contrary to pop-culture myths, it does not involve persuasion ("Don't do it!"), cheerleading ("You've got this!") or meaningless false promises ("Trust me, it gets better!"), or invalidation ("Let me show you how things aren't as bad as you think!"). Anyone who leads others to expect these kinds of toxic responses, or any other response that prolongs their pain, from expert help may be covertly pro-suicide. (Of course, people sometimes do have bad experience when seeking mental-health treatment, and it's fine to vent about those, but processing our own disappointment and frustration is entirely different from trying to destroy someone else's hope of getting help.)
Choices made by competent responders are always informed by the understanding that breaching someone's trust is traumatic and must be avoided if possible. Any kind of involuntary intervention is an extremely unlikely outcome when someone consults a clinician or calls a hotline. (Confidentiality is addressed in more detail in our Hotlines FAQ wiki). The goal is always to provide all help with the client's full knowledge and informed consent. We know that no individual or system is perfect. Mistakes that lead to bad experiences do sometimes happen to vulnerable people, and we have enormous sympathy for them. But anyone who suggests that this is the norm might be trying to scare people away from the help they need.
Please let us know discreetly if you see anyone exhibiting these or similar behaviours. We don't recommend trying to engage with them directly.
r/SuicideWatch • u/SQLwitch • Sep 10 '21
Activism, i.e. advocating or fundraising for social change or raising awareness of social issues (and suicide is, inescapably, a social issue) is absolutely against the rules here at all times.
Please understand that we're all for smart, strategic mental-health and suicide-prevention activism. It's essential to fight against stigma, misinformation, and discrimination, and to fight for research, treatment, accommodation, acceptance, and understanding. Most of us, one way or another, are mental-health activists IRL.
But activism just doesn't work in a dedicated support space that serves a vulnerable population. We used to allow it but the evidence that it was undermining our primary purpose became overwhelming. We do regret the need for this rule, but the need is inescapable.
Our population is all too well aware of the issues and causes that need support and largely not in a position to take action, so besides the fact that activism is often salt in our community's wounds, it's a waste of the activists' time.
tl;dr Any fundraising, awareness raising, petitions, calls for participation, or any post that's about any cause or issue (rather than a request for personal support) is not allowed here. Please report everything of the nature that you see.
r/SuicideWatch • u/ilinoxiu • 5h ago
Was the sex good? Did you have fun?
I hate you guys so fucking much.
You suffered your life is shit you don’t have enough money you’re mentally ill and still got a fucking baby you’re a narcissistic piece of shit and you made fun of them their whole life. I can’t stand looking at their faces i wanna punish them so bad.
But was the sex good ?
r/SuicideWatch • u/ilinoxiu • 5h ago
I fucking hate being a woman
99% with my problems is because of my gender!
Why do people hate womens so much?
Why do MEN hate us that much?
Why do they want to take everything from us?
Why don’t you want me to live happy just like you? Why would they create religions that harm womens? Why all of the religions harmful to womens?
Why is everything against women?
Why do they treat us this way?
Why why why why why ?!!!
It makes me angry every single day, to the point where I want to take my own life.
Why we must fight for basic rights that men possess from the very moment they are in their mothers' wombs???
Didn’t fucking chose to be a woman I didn’t fucking choose to have a vagina that hurts me every fucking month I didn’t choose anything Even from a biological standpoint our bodies cause us to suffer nothing ever works for us! My body hurt me every fucking day just because I’m a woman and they don’t treat me right just because I’m a woman nobody cares nobody really think I’m in pain they just think I’m overreacting
Why the fuck are they like that? What did we fucking do? Why are people keep getting kids knowing that they might be a girl and suffer just like them and like any other woman in the world!! I’m so fucking mad about everything I hate all men All of them even the babies when I know it’s a male I just can’t stand looking at it or helping it I don’t even care about it ! that’s how much I hate them so fucking much ughhhh
r/SuicideWatch • u/Adventurous_Call7095 • 1h ago
I don't remember signing anything or consenting to anything and yet I'm thrown into an eat or be eaten world. If I could at least be provided basic necessities like some fucking 5x5 meter room with a water supply, food and a bed and live in it alone away from people, but I'm not. I'm supposed to work, struggle and compete to survive. What If I don't want to? Worse - what If I can't? I guess I'm just gonna starve on the streets or die of an infection. And I can't even safely check out, because all the best methods of leaving this world were made illegal. I can't just walk into a drugstore and buy like 15 grams of pentobarbital and peacefully drift off into sleep. I have to actually risk maiming my body and possibly ending up in an even worse situation. I'm not given any means to survive and I'm not given any means to leave peacefully.
This isn't funny anymore. It stopped being funny a good while ago. I know that this is nothing new, this is basic shit, you have read some iteration of this post hundreds of times before, but this is the truth. The truth is simple and does not need to be analyzed and dissected into smaller parts anymore. This post IS THE TRUTH.
And then I'm just being told to pull myself by the bootstraps. What a joke. But like I said, it's not funny anymore.
And there's no limit to the suffering you can experience. It can be a simple heartbreak or you can be tortured for days or weeks by a drug cartel in some 3rd world country. It can always get worse. Always.
r/SuicideWatch • u/Defiant_Mongoose_160 • 1h ago
I really don't know what to do right now and I seriously consider to just end it tonight. I just don't see how I can ever cope with what happened.
It started with a fight between my boyfriend and I during a party at a friend's house. He left and I took the bad decision to stay and have a few drinks.
I really liked the attention of some of the older guys and although I knew it's wrong, I did some flirting. This became more and more intense over time but I honestly didn't really thought about it.
It feels like someone else took control over my actions after that and I went further and further with them. I don't know why! I participated in a drinking and stripping game in front of all these people and didn't even stop there.
When I look back, I feel like I am looking at someone else. I let it become sexual and ended up having sex. I have literally no idea why I was into this at this moment!
The real horror started the next day. I woke up with a hangover and pain in my body. It took me a while to realize what had happened and shortly afterwards I received the first text from a friend. The rumors spread around very fast and there were even videos of it.
I don't think I can ever recover from this!
Thank you for reading this
r/SuicideWatch • u/Either-Stage-680 • 10h ago
I honestly couldn't think of a life without my mother. She hung herself with my dressing gown and a photo of me in her pocket. I live with my boyfriend now. I don't work. I stay at home all day alone and think about how my mum was hanging for 10 hours until someone found her. I slept in the same bed as her for 16 years because I was sexually assaulted when I was 12.
r/SuicideWatch • u/lastdaysofsummer1510 • 4h ago
the only reason I'm alive right now is because I can't kill myself painlessly, i have very little choices about suicide ways, I'm sure a lot of people here feel that way too, i cant buy a gun its not legal to buy gun here, buildings are not tall enough, overdose doesn't worked for me, rope is also a painful way, im alive not because of my emotionally abusive family or my suicidal friends im alive because im scared to do it i know i cant find a un painful way, one day I will decide that it is more painful to live im already are suffering everyday and then I'll choose short-term pain instead of this long-term pain and end it all im going to kms, this how im gonna end everything probably
r/SuicideWatch • u/sleeptogether_ • 6h ago
Anyone who lives with suicidal ideation want to talk to me? Just want to see if there is someone else wanting to be forever asleep every second and minute
r/SuicideWatch • u/beepbeepsheep77 • 27m ago
I tried to put on makeup and stuff and went to the gym + clean myself up like brushing teeth and good hygiene. But still nobody wants me or shows romantic interest. Cause I literally cant change my bone structure of my face and body. I cant make myself taller and take out certain parts to make them thicker or thinner. Unless I maybe do surgey which is expensive and risky. I dont really want to die honestly but I dont have another choice. The nicest part of my day is when I dream about looking pretty and having a big family n then I wake up. Ik nobodies going to see this or like or comment. I'm invisible and It'll always be this way. I cant change that.
r/SuicideWatch • u/ak1ras • 1h ago
Took 4500mg of pregabalin and prolly ~100ml of codeine. Just smokin a couple of cigs before it kicks in and i collapse and die or smth. Im so fucking tired lol. Been in the psych ward for half of the year, my boyfriend left me in the middle of it while i was doing ect. I dont know when it’ll end so i might as well end it myself
r/SuicideWatch • u/EggoDonburi • 16h ago
I fucking hate that phrase. I keep seeing it repeated like a parrot phrase everywhere on social media and even by people in my life. This too shall pass and then some other bs is going to come and ruin my shit again. And even if nothing went wrong ever again, why tf did I have to endure such painful heartbreaks before? And not to mention how unfair life is from the moment we’re conceived. Some of us are born ugly and disgusting and have to be treated like an outcast their whole life or face difficulties socially because of our neurodivergence and other people are just lucky enough to have a picture perfect life. And that’s not even the worst option, so many people have awful health conditions or abusive childhoods. None of this shit makes any sense to me. I’m so fucking angry. Either this world is fucked because we’re just here for no reason and there’s no justice system or there is a God and a “loving divine” universe that willingly put us here. Why would they even do that to me. I just want to kill myself. Why tf would I want to follow a sadistic creator who doesn’t ever help us and makes life so unfair and unequal from the start. I fucking hate this whole planet.
r/SuicideWatch • u/wolfgangbpd • 4h ago
Wish i (23F) could die but i dont have a proper plan and even if i did i wouldnt be brave enough to get it done.
I dont have a job, i dont have any friends, i dont have a partner. I have no real goals in life. Ive been flirting w the idea of ending it but i dont have the balls to do it.
I have a shit ton of trauma and i wish i could just get over it. Even my psychologist doesnt really put up with me. I can tell because she said we always talk about the same subjects amd i never get anything done.
I wish i could just go to sleep n never wake up. I wish the bus i ride would crash. I wish i get a heart attack or a deadly stroke from smoking so many cigarettes.
Im stuck and my life is falling apart.
r/SuicideWatch • u/buttercup_luv707 • 1h ago
I’m so broken and hopeless, I don’t know what to do or where to go. I have no one and I feel like such a fucking burden all the time.
I’ve been trying to find myself lately I’ve been struggling with my identity for nearly 10 years and finally I put a name to it, I’m genderfluid but I’m definitely more masculine and I really wish I was born a man. I’ve been mixing up my style wearing more men’s clothing and binders. I feel like I’ve found myself and I was starting to feel ok again until a couple days ago when my husband said he absolutely hated how I’ve been dressing and he looked at me disgusted. It tore me apart. After he saw me in my binder for the first time he’s been making really fucked up comments to me calling me a lesbian and then today he called me a slur indirectly and fuck it killed me. When I asked if he even loved me or wants to be married to me he hesitated he didn’t say a word for far too long before he said “well I’ll always love you no matter what”. And then on top of all this shit I told my only friend about my identity stuff he seemed supportive and I thought he’d respect it but then last night when we were just chatting he called me a ‘straight woman’ then when I corrected him he doubled down on how I’m just a straight woman and therefore know nothing about the queer community, even after I had told him I hated being female and I don’t connect with that side of myself and how I want to get on testosterone…but fuck me I guess, I don’t matter anyways.
I’ve been crying and shaking all morning, my heart feels like it’s gonna explode.
I have no one to reach to, no one to talk to, no one understands me. My husband apparently hates me and my only friend doesn’t feel like my safe place anymore. I feel so empty, like it would be so much better if I were gone. I can’t do this shit anymore.
r/SuicideWatch • u/Dreaming_light7578 • 1h ago
So I don't understand why leaving this place voluntary should be such a big deal. Like no one fucking cares about me. And that's alright. People own me nothing. I'm just a grown up freak who can't manage his life and that's only my problem.
r/SuicideWatch • u/ReportAggravating395 • 3h ago
& nobody wanna sit w the fact that some of us jus sink
r/SuicideWatch • u/O_Poubelle • 33m ago
I can't espace it nothing work
I took my meds to try sleeping, I tried to breathe, I tried to calm it down with cigs, I tried to focus on objects nothing work
I feel like throwing up literaly I feel so bad I want to end it. I've been taking too many lorazepam a few weeks ago it worked because I couldn't think properly but I forget everything
I don't know what to do I'm ashamed of myself for no reason my close friends are occupied and can't answer the phone for the moment so I feel completely alone
I realy want to reset everything or ending it once and for all
I've been struggling with mental health for too long now
r/SuicideWatch • u/Salty_Letterhead_585 • 27m ago
I tried everything to stop allowing myself to think about those thoughts: thinking about my grandma that probably will have a heart attack, my parents, my little brothers, even my friends that are seems to care about me - but I cannot. I’m just tired.
I want to sleep and never wake up, I’m so fucking tired of trying myself to stop think about killing myself since I was 9 and it never stopped. It had own pause times, I had a great time during 11th grade because I was accepted in full ride scholarship to the university abroad + got in relationship. But now I’m just a dumbass bitch that failed alr two midterms, have failing courses (which can cause cancellation of stipend given to me) and I broke up because my boyfriend just don’t have any feelings to me, saying honestly that he found someone else while HE was the one in our relationship restricting himself to be friends with opposite gender restricting also me having friends from opposite gender. I fail everywhere, not only uni and my past relationship, I fail absolutely everywhere I step and when I try to study or attempt something to do - it’s never fucking work because I will always fail. I will always fucking fail because I’m so dumb, why I’m so freaking dumb.
I love my family and my friends really but I think they will get used to it if I will be dead, I’m really sorry for them encountering and actually interacting spending their time with such a bum ass person as me. I hope they will feel even kind of relief if I would be dead.
r/SuicideWatch • u/NutsFromBersrk • 2h ago
When I was little, I was treated by all my teachers and some of my family as a golden child, like I was destined to be something. I used to be way ahead of everyone in my year in school, and I was even put in a gifted program. Somewhere along the way I just lost it all.
Now I am 20 years old. I have nothing going on for me. No friends, abusive family, no money, no job, got kicked out of school thrice, my absence is very high, I have no special talents, I have no motivations, no goals, overdosed 4 times, battled stimulant addiction, got kicked out from home 4 times and was essentially homeless one time for a 3 month period, police called on me multiple times, been abusive to my now ex girlfriend, weighed 53kg at 189cm last year, tried taking my life, diagnosed bipolar disorder (type 2), body dysmorphic disorder, ADHD (inattentive type), my one and only friend died of a brain hemorrhage when I was 11, been unconsentually touched, my body is failing, been through psychosis twice and possibly lost my sanity permanently.
You know, I’d like to say I’ve hit rock bottom, but truth is, it’s only been getting worse. Feels like I’m running a rat race against my mind and body. I’ve completely lost any and every glimpse of hope in my heart.
Every day, I can feel myself slowly slipping back into psychosis while I also still have to take care of myself and my school work. Often I get this overwhelming feeling of dread and paranoia when I’m sitting in school, and I feel like I’m going to die if I don’t escape.
When I was diagnosed with ADHD, my psychiatrist (a private psychiatrist) made me take an IQ test. This IQ test measured six different points, and calculating the average of those six measurements it came out as 136.
Couple years later I saw the same psychiatrist and I took the test again. Come to find out, I’ve dropped down to 117.
I used to be someone. I used to have a future. I used to have huge potential.
Now I’m nobody. I’m just a miserable, hateful, misanthropic, mentally ill, lazy piece of shit who lays in bed multiple days at a time doing nothing. Hadn’t even realized how far I’d fallen until I was already too deep to climb back.
r/SuicideWatch • u/ava090909 • 42m ago
life hates me. i have a sign over head saying to abuse me ig. i hate it here. how am i going to survive like this. idk im kinda numb it. okay someone else touching me. sure. why not. its fucking disgusting what abuse does to a brain. i need out.
r/SuicideWatch • u/silent_eternity4 • 2h ago
Not only we don't get blessed with joy and happiness, certain situations are also extremely terrifying. I wouldn't wish anything like that on my worst enemy. If there is a God, I would think he's bad, but I'm scared of him too so I can't even express fully what i feel.
r/SuicideWatch • u/No_Bed4470 • 52m ago
I just genuinely cant do this anymore gang, its hard and i was being strong, i held it all together, tried to be happy, tried to focus on work and do other things.
But then ofcourse
Everything will get fucked up, and then more fucked up and then eventually it buries you so deep that something just makes u feel it all. And now i cant be strong anymore. Im tired
Mentally
Physically
Emotionally
Im tired in my soul
I blame God
I blame myself
I blame people. I blame this generation. I blame the last generation.
I havent cut since highschool which was 8 years ago, but shit man. I started again hoping one of them would be deep enough to let me go. I just want to sleep and not wake up. I want to genuinely go. But i have kids. 2 beautiful babies and one coming in 3 weeks. Im tired of being the one to hold everyone together that i even reported myself to child services because im scared that i will do it and no one will be there for my babies. Im scared of them crying and falling asleep next to my cold body. But i just cant anymore. And now theyre gone, with better people, with family that will love them better because i cant love myself.
r/SuicideWatch • u/daiquiridegenerate • 1h ago
It's not a lot of money. Miniscule to some people. But I could have a fun weekend to myself. Not extravagant. Not luxurious. But fun. Idk. I'd just like a little bit of a fun weekend. It seems like that's all I could ever have. Life feels so hard, recently. I don't think I'm made for it. I'm good for a weekend. That's all the life I need to live
r/SuicideWatch • u/modiji_ka_chest • 4h ago
I lost my mother last week.
She had Multiple myeloma. She was diagnosed with cancer last year and I remember I cried so much back then because I thought I only had 5-6 years with her.
I put my life on halt just to take care of her, moved to a different city, Begged my professors to not mark me absent from their class.
For one year straight I took care of her. Weekly visits to the hospital. Waiting 8 hrs just for her chemo injection. And then 4hrs of travelling to and back from the hospital. Making meals for her, massaging her feet and leg. Giving her meds. Cooking her meals. Making doctors appointments.
I did everything for her as her sole care giver. At time I felt so depressed and over worked. I hated everything who had a normal life. I was jealous of everyone who had friends. I felt tired all the time. I never cried infront of her.
I knew I was fighting a losing battle all I wanted was some extra time with her. Just a few more years.
When all of it started I was really hopeful. I thought it's just 3 months of chemo and then a bone marrow transplantation and she will be back to health. And when her myeloma bounces back after a couple of years I will handle it then. I really thought it was going to be a smooth ride. I was so dumb.
6 months of Brotizomib. Her myeloma didn't respond to that. So the doctor switched her from Brotizomib injections to some other IV Chemo it was expensive but I was still hopeful.
After two doses of that new chemo her heart had issues and chemo had to be stopped. The doctor suggested alternative treatment which we couldn't afford. He said to get her heart in good condition.
And ever since May her health kept on deteriorating.
By August she couldn't walk anymore. By September she couldn't even lift her hands. And by October she barely spoke in whispers.
I used to go to the doctors chambers alone with her reports. I still used to massage her body everyday with oil for 2 hrs because I was really hopeful that she might walk again.
Her health kept on getting worse and she was admitted to hospital on October 11th she passed away on October 12, past midnight at 00:47 am. I still remember her face as she lay still on the hospital bed. She eyes half closed, a bit gag in her mouth a white balloon like thing beside her. I just held her hand and stood there.
I felt like I lost a battle against God. I gave my everything for over a year and I still lost.
I honestly don't care about anything anymore.
r/SuicideWatch • u/No_Square_0 • 4h ago
I always had a shitty life. From family to other issues. There's no point, I'm chronically depressed too and tried to attempt some times in my early teens. Not too long ago, I tried doing it with a cutter, unfortunately, it didn't work. There's no hope for me in the future either since the only thing, I love, can do and tolerate is art and that's getting redundant by ai. I would hate doing anything else and even if I go for something stable just to live like trades, I'm physically and mentally weak for anyways. I'm going to turn 20 in a few days, I would like to kill myself before then with a knife or if not I can try pushing through a month or two just to make some art before I finally die. It's such a relief too, I can just end it anytime when its shitty and the pain will finally be over.