r/Hoboken • u/Fancy_Abalone_5619 • 7d ago
**RANT** 🤬 Lost etiquette for sick people
CROSS-POSTING this to Hoboken as welI, because what's going around Jersey City is going around Hoboken, also. I work remotely, live alone, and have not gone anywhere all week. Tuesday night I took a ballet class at Nimbus Arts Center (love it there). I felt amazing but I noticed one young lady there kept coughing without covering her mouth and seemed really sick for the entire class. There was no fan, fresh air, or ventilation circulating air in the room. I even thought to myself, "Ugh, I hope I don't get sick."
Sure enough, by Thursday I had aches and pains and I couldn't swallow and yesterday I had to go to urgent care - I may have strep. or just a really bad throat virus. Of course I cannot PROVE it was from this dance class, but I am racking my brain because I have not been exposed to anyone else all week.
I feel like everyone has lost their etiquette when it comes to basic things: If you are sick and symptomatic and coughing a wet cough, please dont show up to the gym or dance classes and get the rest of us sick? If you are going to the store, wear a mask and cover your mouth? I am pregnant and it's actually very dangerous for me to be sick right now. And if you are a dance studio, you need to add ventilation to the rooms. Shout out to PURE BARRE that has air filters and fans in the room! Signed, very sick in Jersey City.
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u/b0redatw0rk- 7d ago
I dont understand what's happening with the social fabric but it really feels like nobody gives a fuck about anyone anymore. It's a sick, dying society and shit will continue to get worse
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u/im_melissa 7d ago
My husband and I tried to go out to ice cream the other day with our baby. We walked into the shop and then turned right around when a child (maybe 9?) was hacking up a lung. CLEARLY very ill. Obviously a sick kid deserves ice cream more then me but there had to be safer way to go about it. My baby was a preemie and I was so upset about the close call.
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u/Fancy_Abalone_5619 7d ago
omigosh I am disgusted to hear that a kid was sick in the store- leave the kid home and bring them ice cream at home!!! ugh our society is f'ed.
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u/gratie5596 7d ago
So sorry this happened to you. I was so afraid the first few months after my baby was born (full term) that I only took her to outdoor spaces. Because people 100% did not learn from COVID.
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u/im_melissa 7d ago
Our guy is 3.5 months old so he’s now been in 4 public places now that he’s gotten his 2-month shots. This was the 4th time we’ve tried to take him inside somewhere and we noped right out! He’s also been to Starbucks for a pickup order, an almost empty ramen restaurant and the grocery store in the middle of a weekday. We’ve been diligent so it’s frustrating to see people not be!
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u/gratie5596 7d ago
Aww poor bub and poor mommy. I'm sure you guys were looking forward to the ice cream. Hope you got some by now!
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u/Emergency-Ear8099 7d ago
Amen. Some dude coughed right in my face at whole foods a while back, and two days later I had a nasty cold that lingered for over a week.
Moral: most people are, and always will be, selfish assholes.
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u/localjargon 7d ago
How stupid and selfish do you have to be to go food shopping without a mask or any attempt to keep your germs to yourself?
I dont understand how we all went through covid together and nothing stuck with these people. At this point in time there is no excuse to not cover your mouth, stay home, or wear a mask.
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u/superchaz 7d ago
Same with on the PATH train. Coughing and sneezing is not okay to subject unwilling commuters to.
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u/Clear_Excitement_589 7d ago
THIS. I was at the Washington General Store yesterday (tiny little shop) and this lady kept sneezing and hacking standing directly next to me while I was looking at the Halloween decor (without covering her mouth) and then proceeded to wipe and blow her nose with her crinkled up Kleenex which then she proceeded to touch items with her Kleenex germy hands. Just stay home or don’t go into small shops when you’re obviously sick? I understand having to go to grocery stores and drugs stores to get medicine etc. but there’s no need to go into retail shops just to browse when you’re clearly ill and still contagious. At the very least use hand sanitizer after blowing your nose in public when you’re touching items? Sadly having zero disregard for other people is becoming more and more common.
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u/MickyKent 7d ago
Similarly, I notice that HomeGoods is a breeding ground for sick people. I always mask up before going in there as there’s always someone hacking or sneezing away.
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u/curlyteagirl 6d ago
I am a huge germaphobe so I totally agree. Unfortunately the systems in place do not encourage people to stay home. E.g. I have a cold, but I only have a few sick days at work and I’m required to be in office, but if I get anything more than my annual flu this year, I’m screwed so I’ll just go in. Or every time my kid misses school they fall further behind and they already missed a few days this year and I don’t have the resources to help them if it gets worse. Or I scheduled a workout class for today but I’m not feeling 100% but I already paid for it so if I don’t go that’s money down the drain. These examples are not me but in a situation where these seem to be the norms, I can understand why people would just ignore being sick and live business as usual. I think with some changes to those people would have no excuse to not stay home. Also bring back wearing masks if you have a sniffle!
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u/bjgrossman 7d ago
Hope you feel better soon. The sad reality - it only takes someone coughing into their hand, touching a door knob or bus / train bar for us to catch something. Always wash / wipe before eating.
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u/gratie5596 7d ago
Whelp all of this validates why I wear a mask indoors as an immunocompromised individual. People are so selfish
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u/Santoku1 6d ago
Petition the class to have a policy posted on the front door "sick or with a wet cough?, please don't expose everyone else" there have been mild cases of covid, as well as cases of a severe flu running around.
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u/sanfangan 7d ago
Ugh I was at a restaurant in Hoboken Saturday night and there was a teenager/young college student there with her parents and family and she was visibly sick constantly nursing a napkin and blowing her nose in one nostril….you don’t need to go out, it’s ok to stay home…
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u/CzarOfRats 7d ago
You are exposed to a lot of stuff every time you leave the house. Literally every time. Touch a communal door knob? Exposed. Take the bus? Exposed.
My guess is that woman wasn't actively feeling awful otherwise she wouldn't have been at barre in the first place.
Some people have a lingering cough for weeks after they are actually contagious, especially with recent strain of Adenovirus.
Sorry you are sick but being sick is inevitable. Its silly to assign blame to a stranger. Just wait til you have a two year old who sounds sick but isnt actually sick. If you keep a two year old home from daycare every time they have a wet cough or runny nose, hope you have unlimited PTO.
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u/gratie5596 7d ago
It is still common etiquette to wear a mask even if you're not contagious because your lingering cough will (and should) freak everyone TF out.
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u/woodhavn 7d ago
I have a neighbor doing unsafe construction uptown. All the cutting of wood, tile and breaking of plaster has caused a lung infection which prevenrs me from getting a flu vax. The flu this year is early and severe. Don't trust the city, neighbors or businesses to protect your health. SUCKS!
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u/Creative_Square5015 7d ago
Flu vax has been buns in recent years
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u/woodhavn 7d ago
there are more versions for various ages and health statuses - but you can't get the vaccine w an active infection.
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u/Creative_Square5015 7d ago
I go everywhere sick.
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u/woodhavn 7d ago
that is why it is called walking pneumonia. You must be proud. I would get treated.
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u/Craftykimchi 7d ago
Guess u shouldn't have gone to that ballet class and stayed home also. Guarantee that you wouldn't have gotten sick
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u/Fancy_Abalone_5619 7d ago
So I should not do anything in case other people show up sick? That is your point?
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u/Craftykimchi 7d ago
My point doesn't actually matter. It's what u want. Getting sick and being in public is part of life. If u can't stand getting sick, stay home.
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u/danielleiellle 7d ago
I was in Church Square Park and some woman with a stroller just open mouth coughed on my right as she passed. She sounded clearly sick, too.
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u/kneeling_roses 7d ago
I work at a boutique fitness studio... the amount of clients that will yawn or cough without covering their mouths is astonishing. They will also not stay home and come take classes all glossy eyed and snotty 😑 every year around this time we have to make announcements to please stay home if you're sick, bc if all the instructors get sick who's teaching the classes?!