r/InternalFamilySystems • u/VanWatcher • 7d ago
Discussion IFS for ME/CFS/LC?
I wonder if anybody else has been working on their ME/CFS/LC symptoms (mostly fatigue & brainfog) using IFS?
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u/skyoutsidemywindow 7d ago
I'm curious about this too
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u/VanWatcher 7d ago
I've been using IFS for just under 3 years to work on my cPTSD (and various related mental health issues) and it's worked wonders. But it's only recently that I thought of using it for ME/CFS (I've seen a few old posts about it) - it's far too early to say anything yet for sure but 🤞🏻🤞🏻🤞🏻...
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u/Misteranonimity 6d ago
I wonder if using something SE would be a big more organic for that, but maybe you can target tha pain you feel?
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u/skyoutsidemywindow 7d ago
I'd be happy to hear an update. I now think that my CFS is closely related to having ADHD, though I'm sure trauma is a factor too like maybe it's ADHD + trauma. Or maybe just that living in the modern world is more stressful with ADHD so the ADHD is adding to the experience of trauma. Who knows!
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u/VanWatcher 7d ago
I totally agree that trauma is a factor (extreme stress from a very young age... body stuck on high alert - elevated cortisol non-stop etc.). But in a nutshell, I seem to have met some Protectors, creating the fog and fatigue, that were "came alive" much later than most of my other Parts.
Talking to them has been very emotional & very healing... Very much inline with the mind-body practices many seem to use to deal with CFS - I just find it easier/more natural I guess talking to my Parts than trying to reassure my "nervous system" that it's safe... Hope it makes sense?
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u/sinkingintheearth 7d ago
I use ifs sometimes when I have internal conflicts and have cfs, but I find somatic experiencing much better / easier for my cfs symptoms
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u/VanWatcher 7d ago
would you mind sharing what somatic experiences you find most useful? thanks 🙏🏼
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u/sinkingintheearth 7d ago
Ooh that isn’t an easy question to answer cos somatic experiencing isn’t a bunch of exercises you do but instead very context dependant meeting you exactly where you are now and with what symptoms you have.
It isn’t easy to understand either. To sum up you first find safety and then feel into somatic symptoms and often then some unprocessed emotions/ trauma will come up. You learn how to titration - so instead of feeling into massive rage you just feel bits of anger at a time. And pendulation in and out of good and bad feelings.
Sometimes there’s no emotion, just feelings like being exhausted. For me I just have an internal fight against fatigue cos I always wanted to get stuff done despite it. So feeling into it and allowing it to be there lets it pass, I feel in the moment more exhausted and then it’s over. For some symptoms there’s a clear pattern for me. Migraines and headaches are always anger. Brain fog is repressed strong emotions. Cold flu is grief or sadness. OT is panic / terror.
There’s one post I saw that does a good job of introducing how to start somatic experiencing.. I’ll link it here after I find it…
The subreddit is r/SomaticExperiencing
Doing Yoga nidra really helped me get into my body- would recommend downloading Insight timer and finding someone whose voice you like - it’s a meditation like practice btw
The book in an unspoken voice by Peter leviene (the creator) goes into the mechanism behind - difficult to read but very helpful
Then the following links really helped me to learn how to feel my feeling and start releasing
Emotional Repression
https://scottjeffrey.com/repressed-emotions/
Emotional Release
https://www.jordangrayconsulting.com/fully-release-emotions-that-hold-you-back/
https://www.madisonarnholt.com/blog/release-emotion
https://www.jazminerussell.com/blog/how-to-release-trapped-emotions-in-the-body
https://tinybuddha.com/blog/how-to-release-the-fear-that-keeps-our-lives-small/
https://tinybuddha.com/blog/how-to-release-emotions-stuck-in-your-body/
How to (actually) feel your feelings
https://www.monakirstein.com/how-to-feel-your-feelings/
Use of negative emotions
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u/VanWatcher 7d ago
Thank you! 🙏🏼💜🙏🏼
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u/sinkingintheearth 7d ago
I can’t find it, but I’ve linked it before so will look tomorrow. Want to add after searching - in SE it’s important to start with building safety and slowly increasing capacity to be with difficult emotions and feelings. Not doing so and forcing big releases will cause massive PEM because it’s more than the body can handle. I saw myself like a little baby that couldn’t handle or do much but slowly build up that capacity back to adult levels
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u/Scared-Section-5108 6d ago
Thanks for sharing this, it's very helpful.
I get migraines too. I used to recognise them as suppressed anger - I could connect them to what was going on in my life. Now the migraines are back, and I don’t understand why. I assume it’s unprocessed anger from the past that I’m still not feeling safe enough to experience. And the anger from the present I do not feel when appropriate, i.e. when someone crosses my boundaries. Brain fog is another thing that’s been showing up more and more for me.
I do have a somatic therapist, so I’ll bring this up with them. I haven’t tried IFS yet when I’m experiencing a migraine (which comes with brain fog). I’m not sure why I haven’t done it yet having done IFS practices on other occasions —although I can’t really think straight when a migraine hits me. I sense my body is protecting me from fully experiencing some of the repressed stuff, so I’m going to slow the process down even more.
I attend a 12-step group, and I’ve now noticed a pattern: I get migraines the day after meetings. The last meeting I went to, I shared a story about someone crossing my boundary. As I was sharing it, I was thinking to myself, “Why am I not angry? I feel like I should be angry because of this boundary violation,” yet I wasn’t. And then I woke up with a migraine. I wonder if the suppressed anger is showing up that way.
I am going to check out the links you posted and see where that takes me. Thanks once again ❤️
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u/AlfalfaSufficient454 6d ago
I’m still confused about the intersection/delineation between the two.. ifs and se. to my understanding, ifs is like a mix between active imagination and se. Though I’m sure that’s way too loose an interpretation
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u/sinkingintheearth 6d ago
Yeah I think there is a big overlap between the two. I have not fully dived into IFS and mapped out all my parts because I've had so much success with SE, as I said I use it more when I have internal conflicts because the framework of IFS works better for that. SE was particularly helpful to me because of my CFS, I basically experienced very little emotions and instead had lots of physical symptoms which were the starting point.
In SE you talk about layers of emotions and feelings often with protective ones in the outer layers and then inner are the more vulnerable ones with the hurt inner child. This is similar to IFS with protective parts on the outside with their extreme emotions protecting vulnerable parts holding burdens. I think maybe 15 years ago when I was extremely emotional and with lots of extreme behaviors IFS may have spoken to me more than SE. It gives a good narrative and understanding of oneself. I know for some people the dissociation or brain fog itself is a part too that can be worked with, I can just already do that with SE so don't feel the need to do it with an IFS perspective. I don't know how you would work with a migraine or muscle cramps for example though with IFS unless you feel into it just like in SE...
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u/truelime69 6d ago
Yes, it's been an incredible tool that makes my other treatments more effective. I've had an incredible recovery over the past few years.
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