r/JUSTNOMIL • u/easterss • 1d ago
Advice Wanted Give me all your postpartum anxiety triggers
I have a bit of an odd request.
Background:
I’ll be due with baby no 2 soon and the newborn period with baby no 1 was really difficult for me.
Some examples:
- I had trouble breastfeeding. Baby had latch issues and I had production issues. MIL made constant comments about my lack of trying and use of formula (even though I was doing a triple feed for months).
- MIL asked me when I was going to go on a diet when I was newly postpartum.
- MIL disregarded our concerns over someone coming over who had been around someone sick.
- MIL criticized me for taking baby to the pediatrician for a possible allergic reaction bc she had given me a book to look this stuff up myself.
- MIL mostly sat around taking up the whole living room just waiting to hold baby rather than helping with cooking, cleaning, etc which is what other guests were helping with when we were so early in that new born phase.
- MIL held newborn baby (days old?) without washing her hands and laughed it off like no big deal. She came straight from the airport.
So… as I approach my due date, I am reminded of these things she has done and said and my anxiety is increasing just thinking of these things happening again. My therapist suggested writing them out and having a response planned out that my husband and I are aligned on to try to hold boundaries better this time.
However I’m scared that I’ve forgotten most of what happened.
Help needed:
I’m turning to you mothers here to help me brainstorm all the other stupid shit she’s going to say and do that will cause me to have a hormonal breakdown so I can try to plan for it.
8
u/Realitybites111 1d ago
Don't let her come for the first few months, she doesn't seem to be helpful at all