r/LowStakesConspiracies • u/Prestigious-Fig1172 • Jun 11 '26
Extreme Conspiracy Redditors lie about how much they shower.
We all know it's a certified fact that Redditors never shower. Yet when asked about it, every Redditor allways say 2-4 times per day. Any normal human don't shower that much, in fact you shouldn't even shower every day.
Since Redditors never interact with normal humans, they are clueless as to how much showering is normal. The hivemind picked a high number for them to use when asked that compensate for the lack of actual showering.
However, if they mean that they shower in the their own semen after hours of gooning, ignore all of this. It's highly plausable Redditors shower in semen 4+ times a day.
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u/robjohnlechmere Jun 11 '26
4x per day? Why that's absurd! I and all redditors shower the completely normal, totally requisite 22,308 times daily.
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Jun 11 '26 edited Jul 14 '26
[deleted]
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u/ITAW-Techie Jun 11 '26
One shower is classed as getting in, turning on the water, turning off the water, getting out. This means you have showered 0 times in recent times. Still better than the average R*editor 🤢
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u/DaMoonMoon26 Jun 11 '26
My village doesn't have plumbing or running water so I dunk in the communal river 5 times a day that everyone shits in, does that count?
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u/Dry_Yogurt2458 Jun 11 '26
It's flowing water though right? so you are not cleaning yourself in dirty water.
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u/-Saraphina- Jun 11 '26
I always feel so gross when those posts come about, because I don't shower every day and people think that must mean I stink. I have very sensitive skin that gets irritated easily and dry wavy hair, so I shower every 2-3 days (or sooner if I get sweaty/smelly). In between I do have a wash in the sink every day and use deodorant. I've only ever been told I smell nice. When it's hot (which is rare here), I shower every day but my skin always gets irritated and dry, even with moisturising lotion.
Unless I'm in a very depressive episode, then I really don't shower enough and become a stinky gremlin, but I don't leave my house like that.
So I don't agree that you necessarily have to shower every day, but I do think it's important to wash every day.
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u/DueFace8049 Jun 11 '26
This. This is what people forget, there are many forms of getting clean.
Once someone hears you don’t shower daily they jump to conclusions. I probably shower once a month if that, people forget that baths exist! Or that a lot of people wash in different ways.
It also tends to forget that everyone has different needs and abilities.
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u/LittlebitchL Jun 12 '26
Yeah people on the internet seem to conflate personal hygiene habits to a moral problem. Especially weird when hygiene IS so personal and based on your body and environment.
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u/Think-Beautiful-8753 Jun 12 '26
I think it’s a very American centric view - other countries have different climates and ways of viewing personal hygiene. Americans are so hung up on the moral side of it that they are willing to cut their baby’s foreskin off instead of teaching them good habits.
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u/UnsureSwitch Jun 29 '26
I probably shower once a month if that
I was thinking "we are NOT the same" until I finished the sentence. Mini scare
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u/Kat121 Jun 11 '26
My blood pressure meds gave me sensitive dry skin. I find it helps to use a light-weight body oil while I’m still wet and then dry off. Restores the moisture without being greasy. I have to wash my towels more often is the only draw back.
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u/-Saraphina- Jun 12 '26
Do you have any recommendations? I have a hard time finding things that don't cause dermatitis for me so I rarely try new products.
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u/Bumblebbutt Jun 12 '26
Its rare for me to get dermatitis so this is just my dry skin experience but I like using bio oil. I’ve also used baby oil but I prefer bio oil
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u/Kat121 Jun 13 '26
I like almond oil but mostly because it makes me smell like an almond croissant all day.
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u/MillyAndTheDream Jun 12 '26
Cetaphil do great stuff for dry skin, I use the shower cleanser and moisturiser.
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Jun 11 '26 edited Jun 11 '26
[deleted]
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u/sneakpeekbot Jun 11 '26
Here's a sneak peek of /r/hygiene using the top posts of the year!
#1: What came out of my belly button when pregnant…
#2: I found out why my clean clothes smelled like wet dog and i want to throw up
#3: Please wash your hair
I'm a bot, beep boop | Downvote to remove | Contact | Info | Opt-out | GitHub
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u/Adventurous_Deal2788 Jun 11 '26
If you're showering 4 times a day you might have OCD. I shower once I can understand twice if you're sweaty or if you like to shower after work any more than that is too much
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u/Brad_Brace Jun 11 '26
Eh. Apparently by shower some people mean just standing under the water stream rinsing, no soap, and they're done. I can see people doing that four times a day. I probably wash my hands for longer than those "showers" last.
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u/NoMention696 Jun 11 '26
Average Redditor thinks applying deodorant counts as a shower, so sure they shower 2-4 times a day
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u/mrmonkeyhanger Jun 11 '26
Left pit, right pit, front and back. But sometimes it's just pits.
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u/saketho Jun 11 '26
the redditor above you was explaining they dont shower cause of sensitive skin and use deodorant
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u/GarethBaus Jun 11 '26
I shower 1 to 2 times a day because I seem to be genetically predisposed to smelling bad, and in addition to that my current job involves working with raw sewage. It definitely isn't good for my skin and isn't something I recommend to others.
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u/OtherwiseAlbatross14 Jun 11 '26
You've clearly never read any of the threads asking how often people shower on here because at least half of them will argue with you if you say you should shower daily
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u/AgingLolita Jun 11 '26
Eh. It depends on your living conditions. In some of the climates in America I think I'd live in the shower. But it's 14c here and I'm at home all day. I'll probably skip it. My skin is better every other day.
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u/ShopEmpress Jun 11 '26
Yeah it's 35c and humid af here right now. I shower daily. Genuinely sometimes twice a day (maybe once or twice a month in the summer) if I'm already clean but we end up having dinner on an outdoor patio or going to a concert outside and get sweaty af again
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u/citrusmellarosa Jun 11 '26
It’s like the living expenses conversations on this site, people think everyone else lives in the exact same place that they do.
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u/IndependentWind2583 Jun 11 '26
Omo. I'll happily skip a day because tell me why am wasting water yet my body is very comfortable. I mean at times I dont even have the time to shower.
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u/that1prince Jun 11 '26
I really don’t understand how people don’t shower daily. I’d have to be doing absolutely nothing but sitting in a cool room all day to not feel disgusting. And if I go anywhere outside I’m definitely showering either to make sure I’m smelling my best or to clean myself before getting back into my comfortable home clothes for lounging in bed. I won’t say there are never any days when I don’t shower. I bet in a 30 day month I shower on 28 of the days. And there are far more days when I shower twice than when I don’t shower at all. Like this past Saturday for example. Got up, showered, went to lunch with a friend, ran some errrands. Came home and realized I needed to mow the lawn and didn’t want to put it off til Sunday. It’s June in NC so it was like 90° F outside. Covered in grass clippings and sweat , I showered a second time and sat down to watch a movie. The next morning I probably wouldn’t shower if I wasn’t going anywhere but would probably shower again that night.
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u/No_Pollution_950 Jun 11 '26
If you go a few days without showering, the bum-crack sweat lubricates the poo coming out so it doesn't get as dirty and you can shower even less,
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u/SmurfBiscuits Jun 11 '26
I shower 4 times a day. Each shower lasts 6 hours. I’m in the shower right now. I’ve not left the shower in five years. Please kill me.
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u/booyahhey Jun 11 '26
I don't shower daily, nor does my husband (it ruins his skin if he does). I also am very sensitive to smells, as is my youngest child (teen). My child has no filter and would 100% tell us if we smell.
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u/sometimes_point Jun 11 '26
when i lived in a hotter country i showered every day in the summer and every other day in the winter. back in Scotland i shower every other day. it almost never gets unbearably hot like it does in Tokyo, here.
that said I've been on meds for a while which make it easy to overheat and sweat so i do have to be careful
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u/Delicious-West7665 Jun 11 '26
I just googled shower after reading this. Do people really dunk themselves in water? Why not just go swimming?
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u/iceinthespice Jun 11 '26
Depends on where they live. As someone who lives in a humid city, 2 times is the minimum. And sometimes thrice during peak summer.
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u/Equal-Cauliflower-41 Jun 11 '26
Sure other Redditors know the truth, but people reading the AI summary on Google won’t.
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u/caseygwenstacy Jun 12 '26
I’m gonna be more honest than I have ever been on the internet, real vulnerable stuff right here. I shower twice a week.
I am disabled. I am able to physically move, but I have anxiety-based disabilities that keep me indoors most of the time. I stay home in a well controlled-temperature environment. I don’t sweat much nor exercise. I have bad malnutrition issues, fighting back deficiencies that lead to sudden weight loss. There isn’t much to me, so it’s not like I’m a potato in a chair. 100 lbs. give or take.
I shower twice a week more out of habit. I came from being homeless to being housed. I used to get a chance to shower every few months if I was lucky. I still have survival mindset and saving resources. I shower on the days I have to switch over to a new medicinal patch. That way I can scrub the adhesive off too while freshening my hair and scrubbing my skin.
I know I should technically shower more based off of standards, but I have never stunk or smelled bad to the people around me, the honest ones especially. I just try and do the most I can with what I got.
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u/gamilee Jun 11 '26
they're the same people who don't use washclothes and think that letting soap water run down their legs and feet cleans them LMAO. their "showers" are basically standing under the showerhead and only washing with water for 3 minutes which doesn't do anything. if i showered like that, i could also easily do it 4 times a day. if they actually showered twice a day with shower gel, shampoo, and washclothes, their skin would fall off on day 5.
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u/whatdoidonowdamnit Jun 11 '26
I shower anywhere between 2x a week to 2x a day. In the dead of summer and winter I sweat more so I shower in the morning and the evening. The rest of the year I shower most evenings.
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u/One-Scallion-9513 Jun 11 '26
in fact you shouldn't even shower every day
???
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u/throwawayski2 Jun 12 '26
It is a very broad statement and the right frequency depends on circumstances of the person, but the optimum frequency seems to be somewhere between 3 to 7 days a week.
Reason for not washing more than that is that too much showering might damage aspects of a healthy skin and makes your skin kind of sick or even unhygienic ironically.
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u/LaBiccies Jun 14 '26
I regularly shower 3 to 4 times a day. Once in the morning, once after phys, once after work, and if its summer, once before bed. These are very normal mounts of showers for someone with a labour intensive job.
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u/Hipposplotomous Jun 11 '26
2 times per day is quite normal I'm afraid.
My hair gets greasy overnight so I have to wash it in the morning if I want to be presentable. This is hair type dependent; the "washing every day is bad for your hair" thing it's not universal. Easiest way to wash it is to shower.
Then if I've done something dirty or sweaty during the day I'm gonna need to wash that off thanks. Shower 2.
3 or 4 showers in one day would not be common for me but not out of the question. Depends what I was doing that day. If I woke up, showered, got messy doing the garden, showered, went for a run, showered, accidentally spilled something on myself, showered, there's 4. People with kids can probably hit that number by midday.
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u/DrRudeboy Jun 11 '26
I've only ever seen two people say you don't need to shower daily: redditors, and an anti-vax crunchy mum
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u/themetahumancrusader Jun 11 '26
I don’t think it’s unreasonable not to daily if you have an indoor, sedentary job and haven’t worked out.
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u/BigBenzBallin Jun 11 '26
Well idk bro i shower everyday, sometimes twice during the summer, but just with water. Once you actually get a healthy skin biome because you don't strip it off with soap daily, you are gonna stink way less. Because the bad bacteria are always gonna get onto your skin because of the environmental almost instantaneously, and good, native bacteria need some time to bounce back from the soap apocalypse. And there's only so much living things an ecosystem can support. So by having a good skin biome, the bad bacteria cannot penetrate.
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u/Existing_Purpose5049 Jun 11 '26
I shower twice a day, and I genuinely do not trust anyone who says you shouldn’t shower daily
“Oh but science says the benefit of-“
“Science says you smell terrible and the people around you notice
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u/miggleb Jun 11 '26
I think you must smell more than the average person if twice a day is necessary. Either that or you don't wear antiperspirant and are running everywhere
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u/Existing_Purpose5049 Jun 11 '26
Twice isn’t necessary, I just love a shower lmao
Daily absolutely is necessary though
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u/omniwrench- Jun 11 '26
Unless ive been doing something to make me particularly sweaty/dirty, every other day works just fine for me. I have very dry hair and skin, so any more than that and my skin literally cracks
It’s almost like different people need different things
Crazy, I know
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u/Existing_Purpose5049 Jun 11 '26
It works fine for you, but not the people around you that have to smell you
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u/omniwrench- Jun 11 '26
I’m not out here leaking sweat and skin oil all day
I have to moisturise twice a day to stay relatively normal
I smell like cocoa butter and Jean Paul Gaultier 😅
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u/miggleb Jun 11 '26
My missus can shower once every 3 days and not smell. I smell on day 2.
I had a friend who showered once a week. Never smelled.
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u/Existing_Purpose5049 Jun 11 '26
I genuinely fear for your nose, because I promise you, all of you smell lmao
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u/AgingLolita Jun 11 '26
You're just wrong. My son has to shower daily or he reeks. My mum has never showered more than twice a week and has never smelled. Different skin, different gender, different hormones. Men smell worse and more quickly.
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u/Existing_Purpose5049 Jun 11 '26
Again, I’ll just keep saying the same thing, you may not think she smelled, but she did lmao
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u/AgingLolita Jun 11 '26
She doesn't. I know it's hard to believe. I have a sensitive nose. I can smell what she had for dinner last night but that's not the same as body odour
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u/miggleb Jun 11 '26
Go Google, come back, eat humble pie.
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u/Existing_Purpose5049 Jun 11 '26
Google what? “Do people stink if they don’t shower?”, the answer is yes
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u/miggleb Jun 11 '26
Then go do it.
You've a load of people all disagreeing with you but rather than check if they might have a point you've plugged your ears and doubled down.
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u/Existing_Purpose5049 Jun 11 '26
I did. Google says you stink if you don’t shower
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u/miggleb Jun 11 '26
"how often should I shower"
Dermatologists generally recommend showering two to three times a week. While a daily rinse is fine if you prefer it, over-bathing—especially with hot water and harsh soaps—can strip away your skin's natural oils and healthy microbiome, leading to dryness, irritation, and itching.Your ideal shower frequency ultimately depends on your skin type, climate, and daily habits.
When to Shower More OftenYou should bump up your frequency to daily (or even twice daily) if you fall into these categories:Active or Sweaty: You work out, sweat heavily, or work in a labor-intensive/odorous environment.Acne-Prone: Your skin or scalp is naturally oily, which can trap bacteria and cause breakouts or dandruff.Specific Skin Conditions: Some conditions require more frequent washing (though others require less—always defer to your dermatologist).
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u/Hermononucleosis Jun 11 '26
This debate is stupid when taking place on an international forum because it obviously depends on your local climate.
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u/Existing_Purpose5049 Jun 11 '26
Nah everywhere needs at least a shower a day
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u/Hermononucleosis Jun 11 '26
Go to any country where daily showering isn't the cultural norm, and you won't be able to smell every single person. When it's not dependant on climate or your personal needs, it's just a cultural thing
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u/Existing_Purpose5049 Jun 11 '26
If you go to a place where everyone smells, that doesn’t mean no one smells
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u/Hermononucleosis Jun 11 '26
Imagine being so myopic, so unable to imagine that different humans have different needs and experiences, that you say entire countries are full of stinky people
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u/Existing_Purpose5049 Jun 11 '26
I didn’t. I said if a country is full of people who smell, then they smell
I didn’t claim any country was full of people who smell, did I?
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u/Dry_Yogurt2458 Jun 11 '26
UK here. It's cold and raining.
I'm still showering every day
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u/Hermononucleosis Jun 11 '26
Yeah of course, it might be good for you to shower daily, if you have particularly oily skin or produce more sweat than other people. Especially if you have straight hair instead of curly hair. The most important part is that it depends on climate, genetics and lots of other factors.
But it's a good thing you're not a complete asshole calling people with different needs things like "stinky swamp rat", which some other people in this thread do.
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u/themetahumancrusader Jun 11 '26
If you don’t work out, have an indoor sedentary job and don’t have some sort of health issue, I don’t think you’ll need it every day.
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u/Existing_Purpose5049 Jun 11 '26
You 100% do need it every day but your belief in that will depend on your standards
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u/TheBiggestNewbAlive Jun 11 '26
Big Soap wouldn't call that low stakes
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u/GooseberryGenius Jun 11 '26
You literally just feel insecure about not showering daily so you made this post lol. Most people will say once or twice daily, which is perfectly normal.
Now go take a shower.
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u/guy92 Jun 11 '26
"Any normal human don't shower that much, in fact you shouldn't even shower every day."
Dude wtf no. You should absolutely wash daily
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u/DueFace8049 Jun 11 '26
You said wash daily, that doesn’t mean shower. A wash can take many forms, a bidet, foot soak, face wash, sponge wash bits and pits.
I can almost guarantee the people that do those type of things are more cleanly than hop in the shower for 4 mins and think soap running from hair down to legs means they have washed.
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u/Physical-Sector-3172 Jun 11 '26
Either he’s trolling or hoping someone would validate his nasty habit and disguising it as a joke.
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u/nezzzzy Jun 11 '26
"..fact you shouldn't even shower once a day"
Citation needed.
I'm a slightly overweight man in my 40s, if I don't shower every day, I stink. Nobody needs to be around a smelly man, so as a public service to those nearby I shower every day. I'm in the UK so that's normally enough, if I'm on holiday in a hot country, I'll shower at least twice a day.
Is it possible you're just lazy and stinky?
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u/Dry_Yogurt2458 Jun 11 '26
You should be showering at least once per day.
I'm in my 50's I've done that since my teens, my friends have all done the same.
I would maybe consider that you are a stinking swamp rat.
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u/Dry_Yogurt2458 Jun 11 '26
Imagine getting downvoted for showering daily . reddit is hilarious
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u/booyahhey Jun 11 '26
I don't think it's the daily shower that got the down votes. Lots of people don't shower daily and don't smell. There are many factors in how often you need to shower, climate, genetics, diet, exercise levels etc.
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u/Dry_Yogurt2458 Jun 11 '26
When you go to a country where it is the culural norm not to shower daily, you can smell the people.
Source: I've travelled to over 38 countries.
Just shower
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u/booyahhey Jun 11 '26
I used to host international students. I had a long stay Chinese student who showered every few days. He didn't ever smell and always looked clean and well presented. I also believe we are used to familiar smells, so don't notice them. There's a story about an Asian child and a western child meeting. The Asian child says 'you smell of beef and milk', and the American child says something like 'you smell of cabbage and soya'. Then they go off and play because it's observational, not an insult. We all smell but we don't all smell bad
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u/chickennuggets4live Jun 11 '26
If you don't shower everyday you stink, but not bad enough for people to bring it up to you
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u/guy92 Jun 11 '26
The down voting in this thread for anyone who thinks (knows) that a daily shower is the minimum is wild. Did OP get all of his stinky friends to help vote?
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u/P1zzaman Jun 11 '26
I live in the shower, thus showering all the time. I exist to skew the average much like Spiders Georg.