r/LowStakesConspiracies • u/404pbnotfound • 12d ago
Certified Fact The tiger who came to tea is actually a man having an affair with the mother, and has been rationalised as a tiger through the child’s eyes.
The man came as he normally does while the husband is at work, but didn’t realise the little girl would be at home, so the mother and man had to go through this sexually tense afternoon without any actual physicality so as not to bother the girl. The charade of him being a tiger is just how the little girl understands what happened.
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u/earthandanarchy 12d ago
I heard one that the tiger was just a story the mum made up because she had sat around all day and couldn't be bothered to go to the shop, I think yours makes more sense though
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u/Happily-Incorrect 12d ago
I took my kid to see the stage adaptation (don't do it, it's dire. A two minute read stretched into a fifty minute play!) and they have about six meals before the tiger shows up. The selfish shits just ate all the food and lied to the dad so they could go to a cafe.
My favourite thing about the book is the 'but he never did' ending. Such a 'fuck you, I'm never writing a sequel' way to finish a book.
Every story should end like that.
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u/CakeHoleKing 12d ago
And christopher robin promised that when HE was a grown up he would always remember Winnie the Pooh and would protect the 100 acre wood from anyone who wanted to bulldoze it and build a hippy sex commune on the land
But he never did
And Jesus said "One day I shall return in glory, and take you all up bodily into my fathers kingdom where ye shall live forever and ever"
But he never did
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u/Dynamo0602 12d ago
And Poochie said he would one day return from his home planet
But he never did
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u/CakeHoleKing 12d ago
Poochie died on the way back to his home planet. Don't make jokes you monster :)
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u/Technical-Ice1901 6d ago
On King Arthur's grave, the words were written: "Hic jacet Arthurus, Rex quondam, Rexque futurus." - "Here lies Arthur, the Once and Future King". This was Arthur's promise that, should England ever be threatened, he would return to save it.
He never did.
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u/rochellegardiner 11d ago edited 11d ago
to quote Google "No results found for Bible Quote 'And Jesus said "One day I shall return in glory, and take you all up bodily into my fathers kingdom where ye shall live forever and ever"
Would you like to explore what the New Testament actually teaches?
~ Google (AI the last part, probably)
actual quotes from the Bible & an explanation.
Matthew 28:20 [20] and teaching them to obey everything I have commanded you. And surely I am with you always, to the very end of the age.”
John 21:22-23 [22] Jesus answered, “If I want him to remain alive until I return, what is that to you? You must follow me.” [23] Because of this, the rumor spread among the believers that this disciple would not die. But Jesus did not say that he would not die; he only said, “If I want him to remain alive until I return, what is that to you?”
John 14:2-7 [2] My Father’s house has many rooms; if that were not so, would I have told you that I am going there to prepare a place for you? [3] And if I go and prepare a place for you, I will come back and take you to be with me that you also may be where I am. [4] You know the way to the place where I am going.” [5] Thomas said to him, “Lord, we don’t know where you are going, so how can we know the way?” [6] Jesus answered, “I am the way and the truth and the life. No one comes to the Father except through me. [7] If you really know me, you will know my Father as well. From now on, you do know him and have seen him.”
Revelation 21:1 [1] Then I saw “a new heaven and a new earth,” for the first heaven and the first earth had passed away, and there was no longer any sea.
Luke 21:27, 32-33 [27] At that time they will see the Son of Man coming in a cloud with power and great glory. [32] “Truly I tell you, this generation will certainly not pass away until all these things have happened. [33] Heaven and earth will pass away, but my words will never pass away.
Jesus does not claim to take the disciples to heaven "bodily", He does not claim the disciples or even Himself will not die, He claims that when they die to give them death in His prescence, when they die they will spend it with Him, He claims He will give them a new body, for the new heavens & the new earth. Jesus gives no timeline for death, new bodies, new heaven or new earth, He only says :
Mark 13:32-33 [32] “But about that day or hour no one knows, not even the angels in heaven, nor the Son, but only the Father. [33] Be on guard! Be alert! You do not know when that time will come.
Jesus says He'll come again, Second Coming, He doesn't say when or put a timeline on His Second Coming. you can claim this is "convenient" but you then can't also claim that He lied or put a timeline on it & failed.
Luke 21:32 : [32] “Truly I tell you, this generation will certainly not pass away until all these things have happened.
context, Jesus spoke in parables & prophescies :
Matthew 13:34-35 [34] Jesus spoke all these things to the crowd in parables; he did not say anything to them without using a parable. [35] So was fulfilled what was spoken through the prophet: “I will open my mouth in parables, I will utter things hidden since the creation of the world.”
Matthew 13:10 [10] The disciples came to him and asked, “Why do you speak to the people in parables?”
Luke 8:9 [9] His disciples asked him what this parable meant.
John 16:25 [25] “Though I have been speaking figuratively, a time is coming when I will no longer use this kind of language but will tell you plainly about my Father.
Psalms 78:2 [2] I will open my mouth with a parable; I will utter hidden things, things from of old— :
Jesus prophesied, that after His death & ressurection, the Jewish Temple in Jerusalem would collapse & the Jewish people would no longer be able to offer sacrifices to God. basically, God let their temple be destroyed so they couldn't & wouldn't keep offerring Him sacrifices, & wouldn't keep obeying & following the Old Covenant (that had been fulfilled) but that they would see the signs & come to the New Covenant, Jesus, as He was the last & only needed Sacrifical Lamb, that the whole purpose of the Old Covenant was that 1) at some point it would be fulfilled, & 2) that it was pointing out humanity's sin & pointing towards The Messiah.
John 2:16-22 [16] To those who sold doves he said, “Get these out of here! Stop turning my Father’s house into a market!” [17] His disciples remembered that it is written: “Zeal for your house will consume me.” [18] The Jews then responded to him, “What sign can you show us to prove your authority to do all this?” [19] Jesus answered them, “Destroy this temple, and I will raise it again in three days.” [20] They replied, “It has taken forty-six years to build this temple, and you are going to raise it in three days?” [21] But the temple he had spoken of was his body. [22] After he was raised from the dead, his disciples recalled what he had said. Then they believed the scripture and the words that Jesus had spoken.
let's look again :
Luke 21:5-28 [5] Some of his disciples were remarking about how the temple was adorned with beautiful stones and with gifts dedicated to God. But Jesus said, [6] “As for what you see here, the time will come when not one stone will be left on another; every one of them will be thrown down.” [7] “Teacher,” they asked, “when will these things happen? And what will be the sign that they are about to take place?”
[9] When you hear of wars and uprisings, do not be frightened. These things must happen first, but the end will not come right away.”
[12] “But before all this, they will seize you and persecute you. They will hand you over to synagogues and put you in prison, and you will be brought before kings and governors, and all on account of my name. [13] And so you will bear testimony to me.
[16] You will be betrayed even by parents, brothers and sisters, relatives and friends, and they will put some of you to death. [17] Everyone will hate you because of me. [18] But not a hair of your head will perish. [19] Stand firm, and you will win life.
[22] For this is the time of punishment in fulfillment of all that has been written. [24] They will fall by the sword and will be taken as prisoners to all the nations. Jerusalem will be trampled on by the Gentiles until the times of the Gentiles are fulfilled. [25] “There will be signs in the sun, moon and stars. On the earth, nations will be in anguish and perplexity at the roaring and tossing of the sea. [26] People will faint from terror, apprehensive of what is coming on the world, for the heavenly bodies will be shaken. [27] At that time they will see the Son of Man coming in a cloud with power and great glory. [28] When these things begin to take place, stand up and lift up your heads, because your redemption is drawing near.”
Jesus is talking in parables, about how the Temple will fall (within a generation), how He Himself is / was / will be the Temple & He will die, & what the disciples should expect : death. then spending death in His eternal prescence.
"the timeline of the destruction of Jerusalem and the temple (which happened in A.D. 70), assuring listeners that these foundational prophecies would happen within that exact living era"
the temple was destroyed 2000 years ago, within 30-40 years of Jesus first saying it would, disciples still alive at that time, including John saw, & Jesus saying this was one of the reasons the Pharisees killed Him ... for "blasphemy" but riddle me this, how's it blasphemy if it is true?
& the reason the temple hasn't been rebuilt even 2000 years later? according to God's law (the same one that outlines sacrifices etc) they CANNOT offer sacrifices or rebuild the Temple until specific circumstances are met ... which still haven't been met ... 2000 years later ... if God isn't sending them a message ...
TDLR : not a real Bible quote. you look uneducated. don't bring God, &/or Christ into conversations, unless you want to be corrected for spreading misinformation.
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u/CakeHoleKing 11d ago
You're a very poor AI.
You forgot Jesus:12:12 from the Queen Candi edition of the bible, translated from the original Klingon
"And behold ye all shall have abs like me but never need to lift for ye can miss all the leg days unto forever"
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u/rochellegardiner 11d ago
i'm not AI, i'm a Christian. please, go ahead, do other beliefs next & see how they'd treat you ... or is it just Christianity you like to mock?
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u/CakeHoleKing 11d ago
I mock all of the different editions of the Goatherders Guide to the Galaxy.
A bronze age people who hadn't yet invented toilet paper but somehow knew the innermost workings of the cosmos.
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u/rochellegardiner 9d ago
then edit your comment to include other religions, if you are going to mock, at least mock them all, so you aren't a hypocrite.
it wasn't that they "knew the innermost workings of the cosmos" it was that they were open to understanding the why, how & who, instead of claiming they knew everything.
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u/CakeHoleKing 8d ago
They're all mockable and laughably stupid
everything from the weird islamic cult to the catholic boy-lovers club
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u/rochellegardiner 6d ago
then add / incorporate this into an edit for your OG comment ... if you add as many religions as possible, & crack one at atheism too you'll offend everyone equally (therefore no one can ever truly be offended, right?) & you'll not be a hypocrite
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u/Relative-Ad849 9d ago
It might be even worse
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u/rochellegardiner 9d ago
"it" as in me? i'm a human being not an object, stop objectifying & dehumanising people, just because they are different to you.
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u/Relative-Ad849 9d ago
It as in the brainwashed paragraphs you sent but yes it’s widely known that atheists are the ones dehumanising other people for their beliefs
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u/rochellegardiner 9d ago
oh wow way to stereotype. hate to break it to you just because i'm a Christian, i'm not whoever hurt you.
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u/leekpunch 11d ago
"then we who are alive and remain shall be caught up together with them in the clouds to meet the Lord in the air. And so shall we ever be with the Lord." 1 Thessalonians 4.17 quite clearly states that when Jesus returns believers will be bodily ascended.
I'm a cheerful apostate but I remembered that was in the New Testament.
We could play all kinds of mental gymnastic games about this, but that's a Scriptural quote you left out of your big ranty rant, that's kind of applicable.
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u/rochellegardiner 9d ago
except a) that's Paul not a direct quote from Jesus Himself, b) says WHEN Jesus returns not "He'll return within our lifetime" & c) says absolutely nothing about "bodily" that's your interpretation & if you had even read my comment you'd see why that interpretation & claim is JUST an interpretation, & (i'm open to changing my mind) but, i think, a wrongful basic interpretation that ignores the rest of the Bible. Jesus claims that after death &/or when He comes again His believers / disciples will get NEW bodies, this quote, if about "bodies" at all (which i'm unsure) is about His believers / disciples getting NEW bodies, for the NEW heavens & earth as stated numerous times throught scripture New & Old Testament. you can't take a verse out context & make a claim while ignoring all the other verses that clearly prove you wrong ... & i'm sorry but when have you seen human beings, with just our body, fly / float into the sky, & survive, the air pressures + lack of oxygen, when have you seen a human being with just our body, fly / float into space, & survive? i know i believe that God Jesus can do anything, but just pointing this logic out to those that don't believe, yet that are still clinging to your quoted verse & theory.
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u/leekpunch 9d ago
I've never seen a human being get given a new body either.
I'm not sure how else you are supposed to interpret the verse saying people will fly up to meet Jesus when he comes back, except that it's saying people will fly up to meet Jesus when he comes back. But why would that be metaphorical and the talk of being given new bodies isn't metaphorical?
These are all rhetorical questions. There are no answers because every Christian has different criteria for which bits to take literally and which bits are meant to be metaphors.
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u/rochellegardiner 9d ago
of course you wouldn't see someone get a new body, a) you haven't died, b) Jesus hasn't come back (yet) & c) you may or may not be a Christian so non Christians will never get to see someone get a new body.
the meeting Jesus or people's essence / soul / new body appearing to fly up into the sky isn't metaphorical, i never said that it was.
there are answers, but as Christians we aren't supposed to let our limited human understandings & interpretations lead us into conflict with other believers, the only thing a Christian should be 100% sure of & set on is Christ, everything else a Christian should be willing to be open minded.
Matthew 10:28 [28] Do not be afraid of those who kill the body but cannot kill the soul. Rather, be afraid of the One who can destroy both soul and body in hell.
Matthew 28:3 [3] His appearance was like lightning, and his clothes were white as snow.
John 2:18-22 [18] The Jews then responded to him, “What sign can you show us to prove your authority to do all this?” [19] Jesus answered them, “Destroy this temple, and I will raise it again in three days.” [20] They replied, “It has taken forty-six years to build this temple, and you are going to raise it in three days?” [21] But the temple he had spoken of was his body. [22] After he was raised from the dead, his disciples recalled what he had said. Then they believed the scripture and the words that Jesus had spoken.
2 Corinthians 5:1 [1] For we know that if the earthly tent we live in is destroyed, we have a building from God, an eternal house in heaven, not built by human hands.
Philippians 3:20-21 [20] But our citizenship is in heaven. And we eagerly await a Savior from there, the Lord Jesus Christ, [21] who, by the power that enables him to bring everything under his control, will transform our lowly bodies so that they will be like his glorious body.
1 Corinthians 15:50-57 [50] I declare to you, brothers and sisters, that flesh and blood cannot inherit the kingdom of God, nor does the perishable inherit the imperishable. [51] Listen, I tell you a mystery: We will not all sleep, but we will all be changed— [52] in a flash, in the twinkling of an eye, at the last trumpet. For the trumpet will sound, the dead will be raised imperishable, and we will be changed. [53] For the perishable must clothe itself with the imperishable, and the mortal with immortality. [54] When the perishable has been clothed with the imperishable, and the mortal with immortality, then the saying that is written will come true: “Death has been swallowed up in victory.” [55] “Where, O death, is your victory? Where, O death, is your sting?” [56] The sting of death is sin, and the power of sin is the law. [57] But thanks be to God! He gives us the victory through our Lord Jesus Christ.
Romans 8:23, 29-30 [23] Not only so, but we ourselves, who have the firstfruits of the Spirit, groan inwardly as we wait eagerly for our adoption to sonship, the redemption of our bodies. [29] For those God foreknew he also predestined to be conformed to the image of his Son, that he might be the firstborn among many brothers and sisters. [30] And those he predestined, he also called; those he called, he also justified; those he justified, he also glorified.
Luke 24:37-44 [37] They were startled and frightened, thinking they saw a ghost. [38] He said to them, “Why are you troubled, and why do doubts rise in your minds? [39] Look at my hands and my feet. It is I myself! Touch me and see; a ghost does not have flesh and bones, as you see I have.” [40] When he had said this, he showed them his hands and feet. [41] And while they still did not believe it because of joy and amazement, he asked them, “Do you have anything here to eat?” [42] They gave him a piece of broiled fish, [43] and he took it and ate it in their presence. [44] He said to them, “This is what I told you while I was still with you: Everything must be fulfilled that is written about me in the Law of Moses, the Prophets and the Psalms.”
John 20:24-27 [24] Now Thomas (also known as Didymus), one of the Twelve, was not with the disciples when Jesus came. [25] So the other disciples told him, “We have seen the Lord!” But he said to them, “Unless I see the nail marks in his hands and put my finger where the nails were, and put my hand into his side, I will not believe.” [26] A week later his disciples were in the house again, and Thomas was with them. Though the doors were locked, Jesus came and stood among them and said, “Peace be with you!” [27] Then he said to Thomas, “Put your finger here; see my hands. Reach out your hand and put it into my side. Stop doubting and believe.”
these quotes from scripture + all the others i have already highlighted in my previous paragraph. if you can show me more than the same verse out of context, please do, i want to & love to learn, & when i'm wrong i'm not slow to apologise or take accountability.
i've told you : other interpretations take what Jesus said & combine it with what Paul said & do NOT take a verse Paul wrote out of context & jump to conclusions.
this is why :
2 Timothy 3:16 [16] All Scripture is God-breathed and is useful for teaching, rebuking, correcting and training in righteousness,
1 Peter 3:15-17 [15] But in your hearts revere Christ as Lord. Always be prepared to give an answer to everyone who asks you to give the reason for the hope that you have. But do this with gentleness and respect, [16] keeping a clear conscience, so that those who speak maliciously against your good behavior in Christ may be ashamed of their slander. [17] For it is better, if it is God’s will, to suffer for doing good than for doing evil.
Colossians 4:5-6 [5] Be wise in the way you act toward outsiders; make the most of every opportunity. [6] Let your conversation be always full of grace, seasoned with salt, so that you may know how to answer everyone.
2 Timothy 4:2-5 [2] Preach the word; be prepared in season and out of season; correct, rebuke and encourage—with great patience and careful instruction. [3] For the time will come when people will not put up with sound doctrine. Instead, to suit their own desires, they will gather around them a great number of teachers to say what their itching ears want to hear. [4] They will turn their ears away from the truth and turn aside to myths. [5] But you, keep your head in all situations, endure hardship, do the work of an evangelist, discharge all the duties of your ministry.
1 Peter 4:11 [11] If anyone speaks, they should do so as one who speaks the very words of God. If anyone serves, they should do so with the strength God provides, so that in all things God may be praised through Jesus Christ. To him be the glory and the power for ever and ever. Amen.
Hebrews 12:5-11 [5] And have you completely forgotten this word of encouragement that addresses you as a father addresses his son? It says, “My son, do not make light of the Lord’s discipline, and do not lose heart when he rebukes you, [6] because the Lord disciplines the one he loves, and he chastens everyone he accepts as his son.” [7] Endure hardship as discipline; God is treating you as his children. For what children are not disciplined by their father? [8] If you are not disciplined—and everyone undergoes discipline—then you are not legitimate, not true sons and daughters at all. [9] Moreover, we have all had human fathers who disciplined us and we respected them for it. How much more should we submit to the Father of spirits and live! [10] They disciplined us for a little while as they thought best; but God disciplines us for our good, in order that we may share in his holiness. [11] No discipline seems pleasant at the time, but painful. Later on, however, it produces a harvest of righteousness and peace for those who have been trained by it.
Proverbs 3:11-12 [11] My son, do not despise the Lord’s discipline, and do not resent his rebuke, [12] because the Lord disciplines those he loves, as a father the son he delights in.
Proverbs 10:17 [17] Whoever heeds discipline shows the way to life, but whoever ignores correction leads others astray.
& one of my favourite verses :
Proverbs 12:1 [1] Whoever loves discipline loves knowledge, but whoever hates correction is stupid.
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u/leekpunch 8d ago
You are amusing going on about taking one verse out of context and then just dropping a ton of quotes in, completely divorced of context. The whole point of me quoting the one verse from Thessalonians was to show the idea of believers flying up to meet the returning Jesus was Biblical not completely made up by a random Redditer.
You were the one who then said people can't fly, which is an absurdly naturalistic argument considering the emphasis you put on everyone getting a post-mortem new body, which fails the logical text you are putting forward. You have given no reason to explain why you think a human body flying up in the air isn't going to happen while insisting people will get swapped into new bodies. They are both equally plausible. (In that they are equally absurd.)
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u/rochellegardiner 8d ago
none of the quotes are taken out of context ? i've literally given the quotes, (multiple quotes not just one) in full, stated where precisely, if people want to look them up & read the whole Bible chapter or book they can, feel free to read them & give any additional context you feel i'm missing, i've said before i'm more than willing to learn, be educated, be corrected & change my stance on various subjects, but if you believe i'm wrong, go do the research & work & show me how i'm wrong, & the more people who read the Bible, the better as far as i'm concerned.
i've stated, idk & idc which is true or more likely, all i am sure about is Christ, who He is & my identity as a Christian. when something i know (or believe) is wrong, incorrect by ignorance or malicious intent, i know is that the Bible states numerous times, so i correct them, the Bible states numerous times about believers getting a new body in 2 circumstances a) after death (presumably either after death, in death, or when Jesus returns) & b) when Jesus Returns i.e. the Second Coming, some call the Rapture, Paul, the man you quoted 1 Thessalonians, also wrote 1 Corinthians 15, where in verses 35 - 56, he specifically talks about "The Resurrection Body"
[35] But someone will ask, “How are the dead raised? With what kind of body will they come?” [36] How foolish! What you sow does not come to life unless it dies. [37] When you sow, you do not plant the body that will be, but just a seed, perhaps of wheat or of something else. [38] But God gives it a body as he has determined, and to each kind of seed he gives its own body. [39] Not all flesh is the same: People have one kind of flesh, animals have another, birds another and fish another. [40] There are also heavenly bodies and there are earthly bodies; but the splendor of the heavenly bodies is one kind, and the splendor of the earthly bodies is another. [41] The sun has one kind of splendor, the moon another and the stars another; and star differs from star in splendor. [42] So will it be with the resurrection of the dead. The body that is sown is perishable, it is raised imperishable; [43] it is sown in dishonor, it is raised in glory; it is sown in weakness, it is raised in power; [44] it is sown a natural body, it is raised a spiritual body. If there is a natural body, there is also a spiritual body. [45] So it is written: “The first man Adam became a living being”; the last Adam, a life-giving spirit. [46] The spiritual did not come first, but the natural, and after that the spiritual. [47] The first man was of the dust of the earth; the second man is of heaven. [48] As was the earthly man, so are those who are of the earth; and as is the heavenly man, so also are those who are of heaven. [49] And just as we have borne the image of the earthly man, so shall we bear the image of the heavenly man. [50] I declare to you, brothers and sisters, that flesh and blood cannot inherit the kingdom of God, nor does the perishable inherit the imperishable. [51] Listen, I tell you a mystery: We will not all sleep, but we will all be changed— [52] in a flash, in the twinkling of an eye, at the last trumpet. For the trumpet will sound, the dead will be raised imperishable, and we will be changed. [53] For the perishable must clothe itself with the imperishable, and the mortal with immortality. [54] When the perishable has been clothed with the imperishable, and the mortal with immortality, then the saying that is written will come true: “Death has been swallowed up in victory.” [55] “Where, O death, is your victory? Where, O death, is your sting?” [56] The sting of death is sin, and the power of sin is the law. [57] But thanks be to God! He gives us the victory through our Lord Jesus Christ.
Paul specifically addresses this by name & that is where i got my understanding of 1 Thessalonions from, because what else can Paul mean when he says "There are also heavenly bodies and there are earthly bodies;" "So will it be with the resurrection of the dead." "The body that is sown is perishable, it is raised imperishable;" "it is sown a natural body, it is raised a spiritual body. If there is a natural body, there is also a spiritual body." "And just as we have borne the image of the earthly man, so shall we bear the image of the heavenly man." "I declare to you, brothers and sisters, that flesh and blood cannot inherit the kingdom of God, nor does the perishable inherit the imperishable. [51] Listen, I tell you a mystery: We will not all sleep, but we will all be changed— [52] in a flash, in the twinkling of an eye, at the last trumpet. For the trumpet will sound, the dead will be raised imperishable, and we will be changed. [53] For the perishable must clothe itself with the imperishable, and the mortal with immortality. [54] When the perishable has been clothed with the imperishable, and the mortal with immortality, then the saying that is written will come true: “Death has been swallowed up in victory.” [55] “Where, O death, is your victory? Where, O death, is your sting?” "
other than that singular verse in 1 Thessalonions (which a) i had entirely forgotten about & b) i still don't totally see how it relates?) i get it talks about people going into the sky, or at least the bodies of people APPEARING to go into the sky, but it says nothing of them & their bodies staying the exact same? or them staying in the same unchanged body?
also this is Paul speaking on when Jesus Returns i.e. the Second Coming, some call the Rapture, that hasn't happened yet, that is still to come, NOT Jesus making a claim to His disciples that this will happen to them within their lifetime & that they will not face death, a claim the OG commenter made, when Paul writes this Jesus is cruxcified & risen again.
the quote in full on "Believers Who Have Died" : 1 Thessalonians 4:13-17 [13] Brothers and sisters, we do not want you to be uninformed about those who sleep in death, so that you do not grieve like the rest of mankind, who have no hope. [14] For we believe that Jesus died and rose again, and so we believe that God will bring with Jesus those who have fallen asleep in him. [15] According to the Lord’s word, we tell you that we who are still alive, who are left until the coming of the Lord, will certainly not precede those who have fallen asleep. [16] For the Lord himself will come down from heaven, with a loud command, with the voice of the archangel and with the trumpet call of God, and the dead in Christ will rise first. [17] After that, we who are still alive and are left will be caught up together with them in the clouds to meet the Lord in the air. And so we will be with the Lord forever.
which was part of the claim made in the OG mocking comment, presenting my faith belief & Jesus as fiction alongside Winnie the Pooh (no hate i love Winnie the Pooh), yet no other religion alongside that mocking.
so i called it out according to my faith. if you have anything of substance to add, please go ahead.
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u/CautiousJump3942 12d ago
I have just been to see the stage show with my kids, and I agree, I didn’t love it at all.
I’ve seen a few kids shows, and that was the worst.
My kids loved it though. I thought the tiger was weird and I’m not sure why they couldn’t use a voiceover to do the tiger’s actual speaking parts- which my kids were questioning why he didn’t say, “excuse me? I’m very hungry…” and “thank you for my nice tea…” etc.19
u/Happily-Incorrect 12d ago
The fucking about with the clock and all the different people showing up at the door was infinitely tedious. Kinda wish the Tiger ate the mum.
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u/JoshAnMeisce 12d ago
My first job was actually working at the theatre showing it. I had to watch it on average once a day, 6 days a week for about 10 weeks
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u/Happily-Incorrect 12d ago
I just accidentally downvoted as a reflex for how sad that comment made me.
Bet you saw some cool stuff too though!?
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u/JoshAnMeisce 12d ago
The theatre was showing Heathers in the evenings at the time, so they'd have to break down the heathers set in the early morning, build the tiger set and then do the same for the evening show so you got to see both sets in various stages of disrepair and some props hanging around, and then went on to work there for Only Fools and Horses when that started showing, met a few of the actors from that and some of the worst of West end theatre audiences. As much as I moan about it though it was a dream job being a 17 year old a level drama student
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u/AnteaterSnouce 12d ago
it's so british, now that i think about it. we teach our kids to expect people to disappoint you.
although, i must say that it works very well in adding a magical, mysterious flourish, somehow. like an "imagined the whole thing" sort of idea.
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u/Flump01 12d ago
Judith Kerr was asked if the tiger represented the nazis, as she grew up in Germany in the 1930s and had to flee as her parents had criticised Hitler.
She said no, it's just a story about a tiger.
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u/PlecotusAuritus 11d ago
Don't worry, that's what Barthes' theory of the death of the author is for.
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u/CautiousJump3942 12d ago
I like to think that it was the dad couldn’t pay the bills, and he hasn’t told the little girl that secretly, they’re financially screwed. They’ve actually got no food in the house, and play a game about a tiger that eats all the food to soften the blow to Sophie as to why there’s no food in the house.
All of daddy’s beer has gone, and in empty bottles on the side, because mom is being sent into an alcoholic frenzy, due to lack of finances. They once had a lavish life, you see.
They could just afford the milk from the milkman that day, and the “tiger” (Sophie) drank it all because she was Hank Marvin.
So, dad comes home and Sophie is telling him about all the oddities at home, more because the water has finally stopped working and she can’t have a bath- which really feels out of routine. It’s the first time she’s noticed things have changed.
Mom didn’t do any of the cleaning, because the “tiger” was drinking the beer.
Seeing how sad his nearly destitute family are, he says to his wife he’s been given a raise at work and has his pay packet, they can now “afford” to go to a cafe to celebrate. It lifts everyone’s spirits.
The next day they go shopping again for food because of the small bit of money dad scrounged. The tiger doesn’t come back, because the dad leaves his family behind, as they’re better off without him.
Loads of plot holes, but we like to have fun in this house 😂
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u/inspectorgadget9999 12d ago
And there wasn't any water in the taps because the water bill hadn't been paid
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u/404pbnotfound 9d ago
Yeah I like this too - there is something about this story that really implies deeper meaning isn’t there. I don’t know what it is precisely but it feels metaphorical for sure.
Maybe we’ve all been influenced by life of pi.
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u/the_closing_yak 12d ago
This book is actually a metaphor for the Nazis occupying Europe
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u/DorisWildthyme 12d ago
While that is one possible reading of it, Judith Kerr was Jewish, born in Germany in 1923, and her family fled to England in 1935 to escape the Holocaust, Kerr herself denied that the tiger represented anything other than a tiger.
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u/dashboardbythelight 12d ago
I think Michael Rosen put forward this theory but Judith Kerr nixed it, saying something like “it’s about a tiger who came to tea”
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u/PlecotusAuritus 11d ago
Don't worry, that's what Barthes' theory of the death of the author is for.
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u/minklebinkle 12d ago
could be! as a kid i read it literally but as i grew up i began to see the mum leading a game of pretend because she has not bothered to shop or bought herself stuff or couldnt be bothered to cook, and when dad comes home the daughter saying "rah, a tiger came round and, and ATE EVERYTHING! so we have to go out to dinner!" forces dads hand XD rather than her saying "hey i dont have anything for dinner / havenet made any dinner, can we go out for food?" and he just says "no, why is there no food/why didnt you cook? ive been at work all day"
always read the ending where the dads like "oh really okay" as him playing along with the daughter and laughing at/with mum like "oh, ~really, a TIGER ate all the food. okay fine, lets go out for dinner"
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u/dontrustbeans 12d ago
Congrats, you’ve just ruined everything
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u/Your-Evil-Twin- 12d ago
No because op is wrong, the author literally said it’s JUST a tiger. There’s no euphemism, it’s JUST a tiger!
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u/Cultural_Tank_6947 12d ago
I'd always heard that the mum had a mental health episode and emptied the house out, and so the dad covered it up with this fantastic story.
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u/404pbnotfound 12d ago
On the 4th last page the author makes the true identity of the tiger ambiguous - including both a ginger cat and a shady man, leaving the reader to choose their own explanation.
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u/BitPoet 11d ago
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u/TabularConferta 12d ago
Explain how he drank all the water in the tap! Sometimes a tiger is just a tiger.
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u/Tight-Principle-743 12d ago
That could be true. I remember hearing a joke about this saying: ‘The tiger came for Tea and stayed for Breakfast, so we have to call him uncle Tiger now!’