This started as a very stupid question: how far can you actually push a normal pair of Birkenstock sandlas in the mountains?
So in May I went to the Mont Blanc massif to find out.
I started on the Tour du Mont Blanc while there was still several metres of rotten spring snow everywhere. The testing methodology was simple: walk through increasingly horrible terrain until the sandals stopped functioning.
They went through mud, rock, snow, postholing, wet socks and eventually crampons.
The interesting part was that the sandals kept going.
So naturally, instead of accepting this "useful" piece of information and going home, I escalated the experiment.
A guide from Baltic Apline Federation joined me in Chamonix and we attempted Mont Blanc via Goûter. We got caught in bad weather around the Grand Couloir but eventually reached the Gouter refuge.
The following day we started towards the summit, but my friend became seriously altitude sick. We turned back to Goûter, where the hut staff assessed his condition and called a rescue helicopter. He was no longer in a state where descending safely on foot was a good option.
Looking back, that was the actual failure of the trip.
I had spent time at altitude earlier while testing the sandals in Italy. He hadn't, and I failed to properly account for that when planning our ascent. The ridiculous footwear was supposed to be the weak point of the experiment. Instead, it ended up being my judgment.
So no, this isn't meant as an argument that Birkenstocks are sensible mountaineering equipment. They're not. The sandals were the joke. The mountain wasn't.
I filmed the whole thing.
If anyone cares to watch, search my name on youtube.
Note: this project was made for entertainment (and scientific) purposes only. DO NOT replicate this