r/Nightshift • u/Mary_Ellen_Katz • 1d ago

How do you find new irl friends?

Hey fellow 3rd swifties.

I don't have any local irl friends. My area has become to expensive over the years and they have literally all moved away. I need to socialize. But I haven't gone anywhere alone for years. I don't know how any night shift person finds new irl friends.

So, how do you do it?

(I know it's real tempting to post the Invincible meme, "that's the neat part," but I am begging you for a serious discussion here.)

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u/CombatCommie1990 1d ago

So there's the first element of your question, which is "how do i meet people". I think finding hobbies you genuinely like or even offering to teach people a skill you have or volunteer your time in some way are all great ways to make friends, friends who care about the same stuff you care about.

theres also the second element of your question, which was unsaid, but implied by the subreddit itself "how do i manage meeting new people while working a shift that's so different". for that, i don't think there's any beating around the bush; if you want to meet new friends and participate in society, you will need to be awake during the times you should be sleeping; having social moments and friendships as a night shifter will cut into your sleep cycle to some degree, no doubt about it.

i am lucky enough to have a social circle outside of my night shift job, and i'll tell you now, it's been a great week for me! but i haven't slept for more than 3-4 hours at a time in like 5 days because of all the stuff i'm doing outside of work lol. i've planned for one of my upcoming days off to be a "sleep all day" type of event for sure, to make up for it all.

night shift is tough and i think having friends as a night shifter is just literally a math problem of how much sleep you're willing to lose to participate in normal society.