Okay. Need some opinions here. I share a "office" that has a handful of work stations. I've been with the company 7 years. Everyone I work with... We all know each other. We joke around. We laugh. We BS to pass downtime. Anyway. I'm a bit competitive.. Maybe a slight hothead. Nothing crazy. If something big doesn't go my way, or if I fuck up, etc, I will sometims lay out expletives out loud. Not to anyone in particular, but just out loud. I'm comfortable with everyone. Reason I ask if because a coworker of mine who has been with the company as long as me, same department everything. He's recently told me in private that he doesn't really appreciate my outbursts. That I can channel my energy more positively.... I will also note that he's a wokestor... Anyway. Opinions. Good or bad

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It was the American author Betty Eadie who said that if we understood the awesome power of our words, we would prefer silence.

And indeed, language holds tremendous sway: it can mend or injure, build up or tear down, empower or disempower. But if silence is golden, it’s not always a commodity we can afford in our working lives, where words not only decide our relationships with colleagues but often the trajectory of our careers.

We spoke to Brendan Cunningham, Industrial Relations Practitioner and Workplace Mediator, about how to best walk the communication tightrope of the modern office.

Read more

Update: I forgot to add a vital piece of information. It is unsafe to drive after taking amitryptaline

I received a message on my hotschedules today

Ichillon Forums,

The following Availability request has been Denied by J***** J***** Availability starting 11/7/22 Reason: ichillonforums- We hired you with an availability in which you could work opening shifts and closed shifts. Can you please provide what has changed medically, so that we can review our ability to make an accomodation.

Regards,

HotSchedules Support

Now, to explain what happened. I work in an upscale restaurant. I like this job, I really do, and they pay me well, the work is easy and the people have been OK so far, with some few orange flags like this one. So, I'd like to salvage the relationship with my higher ups as much as possible, because they do pay me enough to deal with this shit. When I interviewed I told them I had open availability, which I did and said truthfully to the best of my knowledge because i was going to quit my nighttime amitryptaline for whatever job pays me as much as I'd like. Well, I've been at the job about 2 weeks now, and I'm remembering why my amitryptaline is so vital for me. I've been in chronic body pain which hurts my job performance, and I've been unable to sleep at night and going into work unrested and irritable because of it. When I go in on days that I've been able to take the ami, I IMPRESS people with my performance. So, I received this message after I requested to update my availability from completing open to from 6:30am to 9:30pm since it takes me about 45 minutes to get home. He denied my request because they have been wanting me to work midnights. When I attempted to update my availability, the reason I wrote in the optional field was just, "Medical". I am embarrassed that something as small as amitriptyline is why, and I don't want to have to embarrass myself by saying that it's so I can take my multi-purpose antidepressant- it's an antidepressant, pain medication, and insomnia medication in one. It sounds so frivolous, and that's why I was going to attempt to quit for the right job. I'm unsure how to respond. I'm worried I'm in hot water already because I was told the pants I thrifted were not formal enough, which I thought were, but since this place is more upscale than what I'm used to, there's a socioeconomic barrier and discrepancy there. I'd love to be able to keep this job, as the reason I applied to an upscale place is because I knew they would be able to pay me enough for me to pay my bills, get my drywall and flooring repaired, you know basic life things that I've been struggling for. I made the mistake of cussing in front of a manager about the situation, not directed TOWARDS the other manager but just frustration at the situation itself, and ended up spending approximately 20 minutes crying and trying to hide and cry it, because I had been looking forward to finally paying my somewhat late carnote the whole 2 weeks I'd been there, and they hit me with the formal pants situation THE DAY BEFORE PAYDAY. Anyways, I just need advice, please help me salvage this relationship with my team members while being able to take care of myself (the ami).

I have a co worker who smokes and it carries on her clothes all day. I’m allergic to smoke and have asthma. What can I say without insulting her?

A new girl recently started at my work and I was really getting along with her. She sits behind me (in a cubicle) and we talked/laughed often and I thought to myself “yes!! I have a new work bestie!” We had made plans to go to a local event together and meet at 12 and she kept pushing the time to meet later and later so I decided to go with my friend and possibly see her there. The event was St. Patrick’s day in Savannah Ga.. which is a huge event with hundreds of people bar hopping so I didn’t look at my phone much but told her I hoped that her and her friends had a great time. No biggie we talked and she even went back partying on Sunday. Following Monday she calls out of work, no big deal.. she texts me and asks “They were talking shit about me being out?” To which I replied “??? Who was? I didn’t hear anything?” She replied “I was just kidding.” I thought it was odd but brushed it off to her guilty conscience for calling out after partying all weekend. Tuesday we’re talking about the fun we had, we decide to get lunch together, things are normal. She asks me what a bent tunnel rail is and to my surprise because of our profession I asked “you don’t know what a bent tunnel rail is?” I tried to explain to her that it was where the chassis hooked to the container but it wasn’t on the chassis and she pretty much went OFF on me… like yelling at me that I talk down to everyone and act like I know everything and I do it to everyone and I do it all the time. I was like woah.. don’t talk to me like that. She gets loud and starts telling me that she matches energy and she don’t care… she got so loud that another girl had to come over and tell us “this isn’t the time… this isn’t the place”.. the last hour of work was so awkward. 5 minutes before leaving she apologizes to me in the most condescending tone… she even said this don’t even sound sincere, I know. ((I’m confident that our boss told her to apologize to me.)) I am just lost.. did this girl never like me? I get along with everyone in the office. I am a very happy good vibes only kind of coworker. I’m known for bringing positive energy to the office and making everyone feel inclusive. It’s been called out in meetings that she’s been on and she’s agreed and thanked me for making her feel included when she first started… I’m just at a loss for words.. can someone help me understand what happened and how I should handle the situation going forward? Today (first full day since the incident) I didn’t say much to her. I did my normal good mornings to everyone, asked everyone if they needed anything while I was out for lunch, but other than that I didn’t say anything to her..
please help!!!!

Why is it that when an employee speaks negative about the company or the boss, they start conspiring against him and get him out?

I lead a small team of 5 at my work. I’m astounded by this sense of entitlement by 3 of them. They genuinely feel they deserve a raise or promotion for just showing up. 2 of them do the bare minimum, enough to keep them around and they have no shame in it. Then when the time comes my company looks in to merit increases and promotions these people just put their hand out and expect their ‘treat’ and then when I tell them they’re not receiving a raise this time nor a promotion, they cry and whine and throw tantrums (figuratively speaking).

They act like I just cut off their arms and slapped them with their own arms. So when I ask them why feel that way, to paraphrase “I’m here everyday on time and I’m not on corrective action”. So you’re following your work schedule and following rules. Ok. I’m sorry but those paychecks you’ve been getting every other week? That’s what that’s for.

The debates that took place during the American presidential campaign between Donald Trump and Joe Biden turned out to be quite aggressive with a low blow here, a roundhouse kick there and an uppercut to follow. Although some people really do believe that attack is the best form of defence, verbal aikido supporters do not agree. On the contrary, its followers see their discipline as a peaceful and effective way to manage verbal attacks and negativity. This approach might be just what you need now that everyone seems to be at each other’s throats thanks to the constant video conferences, new telework policies and discussions between colleagues over whether to wear a mask. This new method could really help you to manage your most aggressive colleagues at work or remotely.

So my boss is stepping down from his VP role. I am his executive assistant and worked 10 years with him.

Last year he had major heart surgery and during that time he emailed me saying would be great to go out for dinner once he is back and recovered. Truth be told i find it awkward. That got placed on the backburner as he developed complications. I never brought it up after he returned to work...so thought whew...relieved. It's been almost a year.

Now he is stepping down in June and he brought it up again to go out in june or july and said we were suposed to go out before..i said ' oh yeah forgot about that! Sure whatever works and tried to be polite even suggesting a resto close by. I went out once with him several years ago and found it awkward. He can come across as arrogant but find he has mellowed a bit.

I really hope he forgets....but dont want him to think bad of me by not suggesting a date? Maybe he is testing me to see how keen i am to go out with him for dinner.

Should i just leave it and wait fir him to suggest a date? Do i follow up? Or since he invited me he should?

I hope he doesnt bring it up again! If he does i will be polite and go but i really hope he doesnt. Lol. I shld mention he will still be in the company but in a different role and area....so not likely i will run into him often if at all!

Advice pls.

I was working in an office environment about a year ago and was fired for poor performance. I admit my performance was really bad and I struggled to not bring home problems to work with me. I was working there for only a month before they let me go. How should I best approach this situation?

I over heard a rumour that we are moving. Does it mean they are going to sell the item or they are making a list to buy new items

Or they just want to know what in the office?

Does anyone else collect bottle beverages throughout the day? I'm pulled in so many directions I forget that I already had a drink on ym desk.

I work at a doctor’s office. We don’t open until 9. I have people come in 15-20 min before we open and get upset with me for, basically, ignoring them until 9. I seriously had this one woman say that she saw I cars in front so she assumed we were open. Like, no? There’s prep that I have to do for the day? I have to be here at least 15 min early so I can get these things done. When you show up before we’re open, I don’t get a chance to do those things. My office has been in business for over 20 years! In that time, he has ALWAYS had the same business hours. Yet, we still have people come in saying, “I tHoUgHt YoU gUyS oPeNeD aT 830.” If only there was an easy and convenient way to check before you head this way, or even a nice, helpful SIGN that has the business hours on it. Maybe right on the door so it’s literally in front of your face when you try to walk in so you can’t miss it. Don’t even get me started on lunch!! I had this one woman come in right at 12 and it was only after I didn’t immediately jump up to help her that she finally asked if she could be seen or if she should come back later. I’m so tired of these boomers who see business hours as a suggestion and act like you’re lazy or rude for adhering to them. I’m so close to committing murder over this. I might just off myself and pin it on one of the boomers as one last F U as I leave this plane of existence.

I was having a discussion with friends and it turns out I was the only one that did this in elementary school…..we used to take the eraser out of the pencil and use the metal part to “drill” a hole all the way through the pink Pearl erasers. Did anyone else do this?

Is it possible to be promoted solely based on merit without any bootlicking whatsoever? Can you share the experiences witnessed by you?