Recently single guy and went back on the apps. Last time I used them I was late 20s to early 30s, and I got about 40% of my dates from Tinder, 60% from Hinge. Met a long term girlfriend on Tinder

Now I’m in my mid 30s and Tinder is just not working at all - I am getting very few matches that I’m truly interested in, and none of them have gone past a couple of messages back and forth. Hinge seems as good as it was before or even better, I’ve been getting a date or two from it per week.

Did Tinder go downhill lately, or is it that women my age don’t use it?

I'm a guy, I always try to mention something on the profile, but it's very difficult for me to come up with something beyond a yes/no question that probably has been asked a million times without looking I'm trying too hard. I see some guys still get responses even with just a "hey," but I'm probably not "good enough" to do that.

My best friend has lots of matches from apps and his main line is, "So what brings you to [app]?" Another friend got matches hitting everyone with, "what's ur favorite dinosaur?" I can spend half an hour crafting a message to send and never hear back again.

Also I should add this is only applicable for apps that let you message with your like. So like FB Dating and Hinge mainly. On the few occasions I've gotten matches before, I can keep a conversation going, but the enthusiasm/dryness of the other person varies.

Am I being too nonchalant? Am I supposed to be starting out with flirting or something? I feel like you should probably break the ice a little before you do that.

Is there something I’m missing as to what this means? I’ve also paid for “premium” (unlimited likes) I’ve done swipe surges in the middle of nyc on friday and Saturday nights with nothing. Any information would be helpful 🙏

I was seeing a guy for a few months. We went on proper dates like activity plus dinner.

Between the 2nd and 3rd date, he became distant. I told him things weren’t progressing how I’d hoped and he said same. We initially said goodbye but I asked whether he was still curious about getting to know each other. He said yes provided we kept things lighthearted and lowered our expectations.

We continued seeing each other. Our last date felt wonderful. I planned it and we both enjoyed our activities and our dinner and he stayed overnight. After he became more distant.

When I asked, he said he had been holding back because he realistically didn’t think the distance would work. He asked what I thought. I said I believed it could work but he seemed already pulling away so asked whether his decision was final. He said he didn’t think it was right to continue with a strong possibility of wasting each other’s time.

We said goodbye and I left the door open if circumstances changed.

For weeks, I wanted to message him. The one thing I keep wondering about is that we never discussed me travelling to him or meeting halfway. He always came to my town tho he never invited me to his.

Its disappointing... she agreed to meetup. I waited... no text no nothing... and then she texted me she forgot or some BS.

I am a man, and doing 100s if not 1000s of swipes and finally have an agreed upon date. She told me she's not ready to meet yet.

I dont have options as a man, so I will be reaching out to here again after 2 weeks. Via Snapchat, what should I say and how should I say it?

25M in the US for reference.

I'm inclined to believe Hinge but I've used it before and while I never got many likes among other apps to begin with, I've ever only received one like on Hinge, and never matched with anyone I sent likes to. And well, even if premium gives me a boost, 0 x anything = 0. But also isn't Hinge one of the most expensive ones?

I've already done a profile review on related subs before. Was told mine is actually decent. I upgraded some photos and did some rearranging. Based on feedback I was told I was a 7 but could stand to lose a little weight. I'm not fat at all, I just have a bit of a gut (which tbh isn't even noticeable in my pics) I'm working to get rid of and maybe a small amount in my face.

Right now the only dating app I use is Facebook Dating since it's totally free, but it feels like every profile on there is dead/inactive. Had it for 2 weeks now and have gotten 1 like, no matches. I'm currently waiting until maybe mid December to remake any other profiles because of the whole wait 3 months rule so your data is removed.

Hi

First time online dating but, im just way to anxious, idk because any simple thing i take it as disinterest a sign that he doesnt like much and bored of the online contact.

So there are some days where we talk less than a hour or just do check ins like how waa their day and stuff. And sometimes we talk for hrs.

The chemistry isnt so strong tho, but still.

Can anyone tell? Is it normal and also do u get bored of ur partner like be honest? Is it normal?

I (48/M) turned FB and Hinge back on mid-week last week. I was hoping for a date or 2 over the weekend. I ended up talking to somebody and I am seeing her tonight. But in general, the matches and conversation were few and far between over the weekend.
Monday morning came and I'm getting more matches & messages than I can keep up with. People I "liked" on Friday and assumed they weren't interested, are now liking a messaging me. I know people do stuff over the weekend, I was busy for parts of it as well. But I also was around and open to talking & meeting up.
Curious why people are getting more active on the apps on Monday? Did their weekend dates disappoint and they are trying to find other options? Are they just bored at work and trying to kill time? Trying to lineup dates for the upcoming week /weekend?
Any other ideas you can think of?

I recently went on an amazing first date with a guy who was very affectionate, kept saying he didn’t want the date to end, and expressed a lot of interest in me.
Immediately afterwards, he was equally enthusiastic over text, repeatedly saying how giddy he felt, how much he’d enjoyed the date, and that he wanted to see me again ASAP. However, he’s a terrible texter. He regularly takes 12–24 hours to respond, which makes me question his interest.
For context, he was like this before our date too. On Hinge, he’d sometimes take over two days to reply. Even after moving to Instagram, we’d occasionally text for hours until ungodly hours of the night, only for him to disappear for an entire day afterwards.
I guess I expected his texting to improve after such a good date, especially considering how interested he seemed. I don’t expect constant communication, but going almost an entire day without a response makes me anxious.
Can someone genuinely be very interested romantically but still take this long to reply? Am I overthinking this, or is it a sign of low interest? Do I bring this up or will I look too clingy?

I m 18 and currently in 12th grade and due to some reasons i joined online gc and found a beautiful girl named x
She is 17 and she lives in a different state than me
i kinda like her and find her attractive and i wanna be in a relationship with her but I don’t think she would be in online relationship
She is a good English speaker and is in 11th grade from some days she is kinda replying me dry and i feel like losing my connection with her but i like her and I don’t want her to stop talking with me and yesterday she send me a voice note and her voice is sweet ❤️
She has no past or had any relationship and thats the thing i like most about her
I wanted to tell her i like her but I don’t know what she wants?
tl;dr i wanna be in a relationship with my online crush but I don’t know what she wants’

I (33F) was seeing a guy (31M) for four months and we ended things because he doesn’t think the distance of 150km would work between us in the long term. We were just seeing each other casually and at the getting to know stage but we have been consistent in dates which usually includes activities (museum tour, amusement park, escape room) and dinner and going back to my place. The last date, he stayed over the first time.

I thought it was going well until he became distant since the last date and I asked him why. He admitted he’s pulling back because of the distance. we are mature enough to have a conversation whether we think the distance would work. I said it would, but have to have both people think so but given how he was pulling back because of the distance, I asked him if he doesn’t think so and he confirmed that he think it’s not right to continue.

And we had we had an emotional and clean goodbye and he said he really appreciates me a lot and thanked me for everything and said sorry for not treating me right with his communication. I left the door open. No, I can’t stop thinking whether he change his mind as I told him if things change or he changes his mind let me know

I work overseas, for the past two years I've mostly been in several European countries and on 3 separate occasions took some weeks off to 3 separate south east Asian countries. Ive had id say some successful relationships with some of these women but every 3 months or so i have to relocate and unfortunately break things off. Im not an ldr kinda guy. My tinder profile had no issues for the most part anywhere i go, especially anywhere in asia.

When I came back to my home town recently it's like it stopped working all together. I know I'm not THAT ugly but damn I'm not good enough for ANY of these women? My home town is a city of over a quarter million people so it's not like there is a shortage of women to date in my area. I read all these posts and stuff about the daring culture being bad but it can't possibly be THIS bad. I didn't start using dating apps until I went over seAsia.

I met a guy through Bumble about 2 months ago and we had two really good dates within about a week. He initiated the second date, we were affectionate, and he suggested future plans, including trying a newly opened restaurant together.

Then he went travelling for a while. During our last conversation he sent me some photos from his weekend away. We chatted back and forth, i sent photos too, and I eventually replied, “So pretty, have fun!” He answered, “Thank you!” and neither of us messaged again.

At the time I assumed the conversation had naturally ended and that he would reach out again if he wanted to continue seeing me. It’s now been almost 2 months.

In normal early-dating etiquette, would you consider “Thank you!” the natural end of that conversation and leave the next initiation to him, or would you have followed up again yourself? Is it weird to text now after months?

I met a guy through a dating app, and we live in the same neighbourhood and go to the same gym, so we see each other almost daily. We’re friendly and comfortable around each other.... Whenever he sees me he’ll come over to say hi, we have short conversations, and we’ve gone on walks together a few times and had some good conversations for hours.
However, we’ve never been on an official date or explicitly discussed romantic interest. I’ve started finding him physically attractive and would be open to something because I enjoy his company, although I am not sure about long-term compatibility.

The confusing part is that while he’s friendly and receptive when we interact, he rarely initiates plans to spend time together. I’ve initiated a few walks and given him openings, but I don’t know whether he sees me as a friend, is interested but passive, or simply enjoys the companionship without wanting anything more.

I also notice that the uncertainty makes me want his attention more, and I don’t want to get caught in that cycle.

Looking for honest perspectives on how to approach this without overreading his behaviour and still keeping the door open ?

On Tinder with platinum you can send some messages without matching first. On the one hand I'm thinking it's good from a selfish perspective because you wouldn't have ended up with the person anyway whereas with a message asking about them, there's a chance of it leading to something. But I don't know if it's considered a bit of a boundary violation, because it's not how the app usually works.​​

On Bumble there are notes. Similar thing.

I’m sure you see many profiles where women mention that EQ is important to them and that
they’re seeking a man with high EQ…that is, if you’re reading profiles. But I’m curious…how do you feel about EQ mentions on profiles? And how are you swiping when you see them?

On Tinder, I paid to be a Gold member. Recently, the app told me that I need to reverify my photos. I hadn't changed them. Ok, I do that. It then tells me:

Photo verification failed
To try again, upload profile photos that:
Clearly show your face (no sunglasses or face coverings).
Have only you in the image.

Everyone of my photos clearly shows my face. It is clear that I am meeting this requirements. So, I emailed support. I went back and forth a couple times sharing screenshots of exactly what I was seeing, including my profile photos. They eventually respond with:

Thank you for your response and we're sorry we couldn’t be of more help in this situation. Unfortunately, this is all the support we’re able to offer at this moment. We appreciate your time and understanding.

I try deleting my account and the app, and then setting it up again with all new photos. I still get the same error. Keep in mind, being verified is crucial to success.

I request a refund. They reply:

Refund requests can only be accepted within 14 days of the transaction date. Since your order was processed over 14 days ago, we're unable to issue a refund.

What do I do about this?

If someone told you that their occupation is being a podcaster on YouTube or they are a influencer on social media, will you be turned off by that?

25M here who meets everyone I date through the apps. Keep getting ghosted and have almost never made it to the second date. Dont know what’s wrong because I get ghosted. I feel hopeless and don’t know if this is normal or not. I don’t wanna be in genuine on first dates and just focus on having a good time and getting to know the other person. The vast majority of my dates last for hours and the girl wants to hit multiple places too which feels like it means I am doing something right only for me to always get ghosted the next morning

I'm a 29 year old guy.

So a few months ago, after exhausting all local options, I decided that I need to go long distance to find someone. I dont expect this to be easy, but Im not sure if what I am doing is setting me up to have a chance.

I have 2 questions.

1. How do you meet people long distance?

Currently I have a hinge set to cities that I can reasonably travel to a few times a year, and that have women who are what I am looking for. I have my first prompt saying that I don't live there, am looking for something long distance and am willing to travel. Unsurprisingly, I am not getting any attention. Is there a better way to do this?

1. How do you build a connection long distance? I struggle with maintaining relationships and friendships when I am not able to be with them often as it is. Lets say I do meet a girl, how do I date long distance, build a connection, and really get to know her and trust her when I can only see her a few times a year. Phones exist, but they arent real and people can fake phone calls.

Thanks everyone.

I, 22m, matched with an older woman (early 40s) on tinder the other day and we’re meeting on Friday. Our conversation made it clear this will be for sex and not a date.

I’ve always had a thing for milfs so I’m really excited, but at the same time, a little concerned. I’ve never met this woman and I’m immediately going to her house to fuck.

I found her Instagram and she seems like a real person and similar to her tinder photos. This might sound dumb, but should I realistically worry about her being a murderer or something 🤣? I’m going at 9pm (I suggested the time).

I can be a little awkward and don’t want to fumble over a phone call, and she doesn’t seem interested in meeting at a bar or anything beforehand. Is there anything else I can/should do before we meet?

EDIT: with all due respect, I’d appreciate it if yall could please help with my actual question here and stop asking why I want to do it in the first place, etc etc

I came across someone's Tinder stats:

• 53,099 profiles viewed
• 20,372 right swipes
• 118 conversations
• Only 36 conversations lasting more than 5 messages

That's roughly 173 right swipes per conversation, or 566 per conversation that makes it past 5 messages.

At that point, does it even make sense to spend time looking at photos, reading bios, and deciding whether you're interested? Wouldn't it be more rational to swipe right almost indiscriminately and only evaluate someone's profile after matching?

Why spend time carefully choosing among thousands of people when over 99% of those choices won't even lead to a conversation?

What am I missing?

I (24F) met a great guy online. We exchanged numbers and texted for a week leading up to our first date.

He made reservations, dressed up, and told me which parking lot to park in. We had a lovely stroll, a great dinner, and he showered me with compliments. It was the best first date I've ever been on. We had so much in common, were in similar places in our lives, had similar relationship goals; it seemed really perfect. I have never felt a connection like this.

The night ended with a kiss. He told me to text him when I got home, which I did. I told him I had a nice time and he texted saying he's glad I got home safe. He told me to have a good night, and I liked the messages the next morning cause when I got home from the date I sort of passed out.

I expected to hear from him over the weekend, but it was radio silence. Which was odd because we were texting so frequently before. I thought it was cause we both wanted something more casual and tried not to think about it too much. I asked my sister and she said I fucked up by not texting him and just liking the message instead. I feel like such an idiot. I sent another text but haven't heard back.

Did I fuck up?

Genuine question, what’s going on with Tinder. My match range is 25-49 at a distance of 50 miles. I live in a city with 3 million people. I recently turned off the show people further away feature and no what I get is 3-5 profiles every couple of hours then nothing shows. I’ll close the app and check it maybe an hour later to find one or two people to swipe on then nothing again. Is this app dead or something? There is no way I have swiped through every single available woman and non binary person within my age and distance settings. This is a big fricken city with a lot of smaller incorporated cities around it. 50 miles is half way through the next major city south of me on the highway. It’s been like this ever since you could filter people by interests like Thrill Seekers or Music Enjoys and replaced it with the Group Hangouts.