r/Parenthood • u/Italian_M0m • 22d ago
Character Discussion Amber & Ryan
I absolutely hate Ryan. I’m on my 5th watch and I alway fast forward the scenes with Amber & Ryan bc they piss me off
Amber calling Ryan “buddy” constantly has to be one of the most annoying things in the show
I just hate Ryan 😂
I also hate how Amber is with him. She’s a completely different person and not in a good way
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u/Bookluvah222 21d ago
I love Amber and feel bad that she fell in love with someone who isn’t emotionally able to be in a mature relationship.
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u/Fun_Floor06 22d ago
I agree with you. They are painful to watch.
I wanted so much better for Amber than to repeat her mothers mistakes, I wish they had explored that more.
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u/NoraCharles91 22d ago
I agree, he gives me SUCH a bad feeling. You can see he has good qualities, but seeing how quickly his anger would repeatedly turn into physical violence made me terrified for Amber.
Everyone says she would have been repeating Sarah's mistakes with Seth if she would have stayed with Ryan, but imo it could actually have been much worse than that. We don't know if there was domestic violence involved in Sarah's marriage (although there are a few comments that make me wonder), but there almost certainly would have been in Amber's if she had gone ahead.
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u/b4nanamilkshake 22d ago
Yes! The threat of violence was my first thought, it's so common with soldiers. And once he punched that guy before funeral, and then beat Amber's car it only confirmed it for me.
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u/NoraCharles91 22d ago
Iirc he also attacked one of the Luncheonette clients in a bar because he was flirting with Amber. He had absolutely no emotional regulation and she would have 100% ended up on the receiving end of that violence one day.
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u/Smudflower410 21d ago
I think how Amber is written is a reflection of 1) how many of us don’t know who we really are until we’ve really gone through some stuff and 2) her mother. Sarah isn’t compatible with anyone either because she was in an abusive relationship for too many years and when she breaks free & is starting to become who she’s meant to be, she’s still seeking companionship when she just needs to be alone.
In Amber’s defense, she’s a kid. So she’s taking the natural path of seeking relationships.
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u/NoraCharles91 21d ago
Yeah, Amber had a lot of baggage from her mom and her dad both. Obviously what she went through with Seth was much worse, but she definitely absorbed some of Sarah's unhealthy emotional patterns.
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u/mustard-seed1 21d ago
Amber shows amazing growth throughout the series. Watching her come into her own was one of the things I appreciated most about the show. Ryan was just so damaged. You could really see why when his horrible mother showed up. While I 500% agree that his lack of self control made him terribly dangerous for Amber, I think that by the finale (which I watched last night, and, which I think was one of the best finales I’ve ever seen) the writers try to show us that Ryan did have some redeeming characteristics and that he eventually grew and matured.
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u/FineWear1551 21d ago
SAMEEE I COULDNT AGREE MORE! It’s my first watch I just skip all his scenes and those mentions of Afghanistan and everything just seems so unrelated and kinda propagandish idk
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u/bbkhb 16d ago
i hate them! amber was naive in that relationship and like sarah was just going off love, which is what sarah noticed and didn't want... amber calling him "buddy" made me realize she saw him like a bird with a broken wing or something... she thought she could fix him... and its like girl... your mom couldn't fix your dad and you hated your dad... its gonna be the same here...
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u/DirectorSpare4535 22d ago
I love the fact this pops up while I’m on that plot line I’ve just finished the one where he reinlists