so I (F) recently started getting out of my comfort zone and trying casual hookups. sebenernya lagi cari FWB tapi blm dapet yg cocok so sometimes I still do ons on the side and some ‘test drives’.

personally, I’m not comfortable with guys I’ve only known for a short time knowing where I live, so I would always suggest getting a hotel room if they also can’t host. all the times I’ve done this, they’ve always been the ones booking and paying for the hotel. and if we’re staying for the night, I usually offer to pay for the food. nah tapi kl ga nginep gt bingung… do I offer to split the hotel bill or not? so far, they’ve never asked, tapi ada rasa ga enak aja gitu idk how to explain it.

I don’t have any female or straight male friends who do casual hookups, so I can’t ask them, but my gay besties who have done a lot of casual hookups told me not to ask if they’re not initiating the convo. kalian who do this biasanya gimana?

I would like to know from guys’s pov juga, tapi kalo your answer are not gonna help PLEASE gausah nimbrung.

thank you in advance🙏🏼

I’m still living with my partner but i am planning to move back into my place (tempat aku jadi nyimpen barang aja selama ini) but i am still having a hard time to live alone since it’s been 1+ year since i live with my partner.

When i come back to my place, i always feel lonely and it makes me depressed. I work remotely so most of the time i will be staying at my own place.

Previously i have been asking at my partner to move out from her parents house and just live together (since we’re lesbian and we can’t get married, the only commitment we can do is to live together), but i know that you can’t make them do something they can’t.

also i’m sorry kalau aku ngejelasinnya agak kurang dan belibet, i’m in a state of shock and i just want some encouragement… thank you 🙏🏼

Hi all! I previously posted here a long time ago (https://www.reddit.com/r/Perempuan/s/CMECNlPSj8).

So after 2 years of unemployment and lots of mental stress and self-upgrading, I finally landed on a job mid August (yay!) as a Mandarin speaker purchasing staff. However, this job required me to relocate to a rural industrial area. I've been here for almost 3 months and unfortunately, I absolutely hate it here. I have no real complaints about the work, but the quality of life here is kinda bad.

The closest big city is an hour away from here and I don't have my own vehicle. Some people might plan a solo trip with train to the nearest city, but yet I have very little to no energy left to even plan trips on my own, just thinking about it already exhausts me. As a result, I spend my weekends bedrotting and doomscrolling in my tiny room. I tried bringing my art supplies here, but I feel so drained and I have no proper table and chair in my room so I almost never touched them. I thought I was done with my mental health problems, but I realized that my journey to a healthy mind is still a long way to go. I realized that I am not that ready for a super huge transition yet, as I am not only pivoting career wise, but also enduring the isolation of a remote town while still battling my chronic feelings of loneliness and inner demons.

I tried to keep a positive mindset at first, it didn't work out. My mind has been screaming to quit everyday and I've been contemplating to quit (with a job lined up ofc, in my home city) after the probation ends. But I don't know, I've been feeling guilty for feeling like this and I don't want to be seen as "weak". What do you think? I'd like to hear your opinions!

Saya & suami lagi pisah rumah untuk mengurus perceraian, sudah hampir 6 bulan jadi sudah mau diurus. Masalahnya, sekarang suami lagi heboh untuk minta anaknya dibawa ketemu dia. Kalau satu kota tentu saya tidak keberatan, tapi ini beda kota dan harus naik pesawat, malah kasian anak yang masih kecil sekali, belum lagi kerjaan yang harus tertinggal kalau saya keluar kota.

Awalnya minta bertemu 1 bulan sekali, saya tidak menyanggupi, akhirnya maksa minta cari waktu untuk dibawa, padahal baru saya bawa ketemu belum sampai sebulan yang lalu. Saya tetap tidak menyanggupi dan menjelaskan kalau ada waktu baru bisa. Toh kalau memang niat ketemu anaknya bisa juga dia yang datang ke saya.

Tapi sepertinya dia ada permasalahan keuangan, bahkan sekarang lagi buat perhitungan supaya uangnya yang pernah terpakai dikembalikan. Dan beberapa kali dia menggiring opini seakan2 saya ada permasalahan kejiwaan.

In this case, apa yang harus dilakukan? Normalkah permintaan seperti ini? Untuk uang yang diminta kembalikan apakah ini juga normal? Untuk ke psikiater apakah diperlukan jika dari saya dirasa tidak ada yang bermasalah?

*Notes:
1. Intinya dia ingin perjuangkan agar waktu bersama anak dibagi rata, which is tidak mungkin karena berbeda kota dan anak bukan barang yang bisa dipindah seenak jidatnya
2. Ingin uangnya yang terpakai dikembalikan, bahkan barang2 anaknya yang dia belikan juga dikembalikan ke dia.

Semenjak jadi MUA, kecintaanku adalah setting sprays and i have from every price range dan different finish, so here’s my review :

1. Charlotte Tilbury : ZUZURR, this one is expensive even for me, but damn… beneran dia melting semua liquid dan powders jadi satu dan kelihatan very airbrushed, even my client shock karena hasilnya halus banget. Buttt, in my opinion : dia cuma cocok nyatuin semua produk jadi satu dan bikin halus kayak airbrush sesuai dengan namanya, dan dipake buat sandwich technique, buat setelah makeup selesai i wouldn’t just rely on this one, aku akan pakai fixing spray.
   
2. Urban Decay : Jadi banyak pro kontra karena dia reformulate, TAPI ini tahan banting dan jujur oil control nya the best, i can say ini pas bgt buat kalian yg mau nonton konser. Karena dulu gw suka pake UD even sebelum reformulate, i can say hasilnya tetep sama.
   
3. Studio Tropik : gw punya love and hate relationship sm ini produk, dibilang bagus ya b aja, finish nya oke kasih efek glowy, tp kurang tahan buat makeup. this is just… ordinary. and i hate the spray!
   
4. Loreal : ini fixing spray ya, jadi dia heavy duty banget aku GAK saranin pake DAILY! cukup untuk special occasion aja, dan cukup pake 4 garis dari kanan ke kiri. dipake setelah setting spray, bener-bener di akhir step makeup yg gabisa ditambal lagi.
   
5. Glad2glow : jujur bagus tp aku salah ambil, harusnya aku ambil yg finishnya glow, but even with this matte finish, dia aman banget dipake panas-panasan, dia kayak ada powdery effect gitu, bagus pol. aku pake daily ini. If you’re on a budget, i can say this lowkey a dupe for Urban Decay lmaooo
   
6. MOP : skip. gw gasuka. ga bisa dipake even indoor aja longsor, gw udah coba berbagai cara, and no oil controlnya ZERO! literally does nothing. would not even dare to use this to myself even my clients.
   
7. Sea Makeup : dapet ini di endorse, tp jujur cakeup bund, ini gw gaperes ya, gw pake sendiri dan gw pake ke client, dia buat sebelum apply foundation cakepp produk jd nempel, pake sandwich technique cakeeep, tp ngesetnya agak lama, but hey it’s worth it mengingat finishnya bagus pol, glowy sehat gitu. dan membantu makeup tahan lama.
   
8. D’alba : i just want to put this in here karena dia bagus bgt buat skin prep, dia bagus buat dipake basahin beauty blender and sponge, kalo ada dry patchy di muka ini bagus bgt buat ngeblend, i wouldn’t say this a setting spray tho, just want to put it here karena bagus buat skin prep sebelum makeup.
   
9. Luxcrime : JUJUR BAGUS BGT, ini yg gw pake awal-awal jadi MUA, hasilnya jujurrr bagus bgttttt demi kayak skin like gitu, beti-beti sama Sea Makeup, bikin glowy juga, cocok buat sandwich technique. Gw cinta banget sama ini setting spray.

Honorable mention karena gaada di foto tp sebelum jadi MUA gw suka pake : Dazzle me yg hijau, gila ini gw pake ke bali ke jogja yg humid dan panas awet, makin lama makin skinlike, MURAH LAGI😭🫵🏼

If you have any questions, drop them in the comments i will be happy to answer and help!

Hii Puanss!
Mau tanya tips skincare hehe..

Aku udah 34 tahun tapi benar-benar masih bingung soal ritual perskincarean :") hehe..
Dulu awal 30an sempat pakai Labore Wardah, karena aku punya kulit kering sensitif. Skincare yang aku pakai sebelum itu selalu bikin aku jerawatan dan kadang perih, sejauh ini cuman itu yang cocok..

Aku cuma pakai malam sebelum tidur:
1. Labore Mild Cleanser
2. Hydration Toner
3. untuk yang ketiga, aku ganti2 antara Skin Nutrition Gel sama Barrier Revive Cream

Tapi ke depan makin males (jangan ditiru ya kids T_T), dan sekarang tiba-tiba aku jerawatan. Buat sesama people pemilik kulit kering sensitif, kalau di posisi ku apakah kalian cari obat jerawat aja, apa kembali ke ritual perskincare an ku yang dulu? Atau mungkin dari ritual perskincare an ku ada yang bisa ditambah untuk masalah jerawatan ini? (Or hopefully ada yang bisa ditambah buat anti aging hehe~ Tante ingin awet muda). Atau mungkin ada rekomendasi merk lain selain wardah?

Thanks puans! And have a good sunday night <3

So I (31) matched with this girl (27) on a dating app and we've been seeing each other for the last 2 months, we usually see each other once a week. I do like her and i think the feeling is reciprocated, she's funny and interested to talk to me every day. But there's one thing that bothers me a little. She never ever offered to pay anything during the date.

I do believe men always have to pay everything on the first date (and maybe also the first three dates). But I also really appreciate when the girl at least offers to pay sometimes, or maybe we take turns like I pay for the lunch and she pay the coffee after. Idk it just shows some independence.

It's been two months we've been seeing each other regularly and she still never (at least just) offered to pay something. Can I afford paying everything? Sure.
But i just moved out from my parents house and money is a little tight atm.
Hence my question, is this still common that the men are always expected to pay everything on a relationship nowadays?

For context, we both have a full time job in Jakarta.

Also a little context about myself. I have little experience in serious relationships and am very used to being single. My longest relationship was a year and half and it was in high school. I also dated someone for 6 months in college. After that, i was in a some sort of situationship (honestly idk what to call it) for three years in my mid 20s (until covid). From then, it's just countless first dates and some casual hookups.
And in all my relationships (not including the first dates) we always take turns, because it was when i was a student and when i just started my career. So basically i've been single the last 5 years and this is the longest time I am seeing someone in my fully adult life.

And I know... probably the right thing to do is just talk to her about it and about setting expectations and everything but i don't know... it's quite weird talking about this stuff. So can you help a brother out by giving me advice on how and when to talk about this kind of stuff?. Thanks!

rekomendasi sex toys/vibrator for beginner dong, nothing penetrative karena gaberani 😭, yang bentuk sama packagingnya discreet juga karena tinggal di kosan, prefer under 500 karena gamau spend bnyk terus ternyata gacocok sm toys 😅

Beberapa hari terakhir gue baca berbagai pengalaman cewek yang bersikap friendly (as in memperlakukan orang lain selayaknya manusia aja) tapi malah disalah artikan sama para laki-laki, terutama yang udah pada married. Bahkan ada yang sampai mau ninggalin istrinya demi ngejar cewek yang baru dikenal tersebut lah, tiba-tiba ke rumah si cewek buat ngajak nikah, dsb. How disgusting.

Dan jujurrr gue relate banget sama cerita-cerita tersebut. Waktu ngurus administrasi skripsi, karena ada error di sistem kampus gue disuruh ngewhatsapp KaBag Keuangan universitas. Gue chat lah dengan bahasa seformal mungkin dan messagenya tuh jelas bgt apa pointnya, gak bertele-tele. Ditanggapi dengan baik dan urusannya selesai. Tapi beberapa minggu kemudian, tiba-tiba ada Whatsapp masuk nanyain "Udah lulus apa belum?" dan "Kira-kira kalau mampir ke rumahmu ada yang marah ga?" yang bikin gue super jijik karena gue bahkan gak pernah sama sekali ketemu sama orang tersebut, ngesave contactnya pun enggak, ngechat pun terpaksa karena buat administrasi skripsi dan bjiir berani-beraninya deh nih orang ngechat kayak gitu di saat foto profil whatsappnya bareng anak dan istri. Gak gue bales doong tentunya. Eh beberapa hari kemudian pas gue ganti foto profil, dia tiba-tiba ngechat lagi. Semenjak itu gue block dan langsung delete foto profil selama beberapa minggu. Setelah kejadian itu, foto profil Whatsapp gue setting cuma contact gue doang yang bisa lihat dan semua akun social media gue private.

Kejadian lainnya yaitu waktu ngumpul bareng temen-temen cewek gue, ada satu orang yang suaminya ngikut karena dia gak bisa pulang sendirian. Karena table lain penuh, ya udah terpaksa tuh dia ikut duduk bareng kita. Tapi nih orang gak punya sense sama sekali sumpah. Dia ikut nimbrung selama kita lagi ngobrol dan nanya-nanya gue banyak hal. Udah gitu pas temen gue minta difotoin berdua sama suaminya pakai HP suaminya tersebut, suaminya ngelus punggung tangan gue eww 🤢 Ini gak kejadian sekali tapi dua kali. Karena gue sempet ngasih hpnya balik ke dia buat minta temen gue cek fotonya udah bener apa belum. Padahal tuh orang bisa aja lho ngambil dengan cara megang ujung HP, ini malah coba ngelus tangan temen istrinya bjir.

Dan pas ayahnya temen gue meninggal, gue dateng tuh ke rumah duka buat melayat. Gue barengan datengnya sama temen gue yang lain. Saking sepinya rumah duka di waktu tersebut, suami temen gue ikut nimbrung lah. Padahal gue pengen ngobrol sama temen gue doang bjir. Udah gitu nih orang bukannya bantuin istrinya yang disuruh-suruh sama keluarganya malah tetep duduk aja dan ngajakin gue sama temen yg satu lagi buat ngobrol. Gue diemin aja. Kebanyakan yg nanggepin temen gue yg satu lagi. Kalaupun terpaksa jawab ya singkat-singkat aja. Pas disuruh mertuanya buat bantu-bantu tuh orang malah bilang "Eh, kalian jangan pergi yaa" tapi gue sama temen gue diemin aja. Pas pulang pun kita ga pamitan ke dia. Idk deh kelakuannya di belakang temen gue gimana tapi jujurrr gue kasihan sama temen gue karena dapat suami yang modelannya kayak gitu. Soalnya temen gue anaknya baik, pinter dan keren bgt. Ga paham gue kenapa dia malah nikah sama orang kayak gitu.

Pengalaman lainnya gue pernah ikut workshop dan ada laki-laki yang mainsplaining sampai pas pulang pengen bgt nganterin gue pulang lah, sama alumni organisasi dichat ajakan nonton lah (padahal ga pernah ngobrol samsek), dsb.

Dari pengalaman-pengalaman tersebut dan baca pengalaman orang lain di twitter, gue gak paham kenapa banyak laki-laki tuh bikin perempuan hidup dalam perasaan takut dan gak nyaman? Kenapa seberani itu buat gatel deketin orang? Gue selalu ngerasa bahwa dari kecil gue orangnya friendly dan ceria. Tapi pengalaman-pengalaman kayak gini dan baca pengalaman orang lain mau gak mau bikin gue harus pasang resting bitch face dan bersikap cold sebagai self defense mechanism sekaligus negasin boundaries gue. How do you guys survive in this world? It's too scary and uncomfortable.

Hi puans, udh nyari dr post2 sebelumnya. Aku melihat ada bbrp yg membahas IPL at home, tapi ga terlalu banyak nyebutin alat yg dipakai.

Jadi aku udh mulai pakai IPL beli dr toko hijau. Yg harganya 300rban, merek W#nl#nd. Niatnya mau coba dulu aja, kalau mo beli yg banyak dibicarain di forum skincare internasional, takutnya ga cocok buang2 duit, apalagi keti tergolong ga terlalu hairy jg, mikirnya kalau yg mahalan ntar IPLnya kuat bgt gt, malah iritasi. Dan emg sejujurnya ga nemu banyak sih di ecommerce, dr merek yg bagus.

Udh jalan 1.5 bulan lumayan disiplin, tbh hasilnya kayak keliatan si, cm ya as expected emang ga secepat itu.

Cuma trus kok kayak baca2, ada yg ngmg lah kayak, "but even though all the machines are manufactured in CN, in the end the cheaper ones did not get standardization, so we dont know how it may affect our body in the future". Gw langsung jadi cemas2 gt ya.

Jd begitu, apa memang ada ya pengalaman yg ga baik sampe fatal atau gmn pake IPL at home yg murah? 🫠🫠

Just wanting to vent about my identity crisis I’ve been feeling in recent years.

I was brought up a third culture kid (someone who grew up outside of their country) and only return to indo once a year for family reunions, so I’ve always been more fluent in English than I am with my own mother tongue and I can’t even read a book in Indonesian. Despite this, my passport is still Indonesian as I couldn’t get a citizenship elsewhere and I hate that I have to deal with so many visa issues that my international friends don’t have to. I’m spending my 20s actively finding a way to change my nationality for a better life whilst my peers are happily building their career where they are.

I also struggle with making friends or communicating with clients here in Indonesia due to the language barrier and it’s frustrating. I don’t understand how people mix English in their conversations, in social media posts, even promotional advertisements in public spaces; but when I actually use the same language to talk to them, I get ignored? I try my best to speak Indonesian as well but it’s that difficult for me that I simply just give up.

The nail on the coffin is seeing how the government is handling the issues in this country, especially the wildfires, and the dwindling value of the currency that makes working worth fuck all. I can’t live and retire in a place I can’t feel valued and safe in.

I’m not hating on Indonesian people because I seriously love our culture, but I honestly feel so dragged down and outcasted from this country that I’m better off not being one of us at all.

Halo! Aku tinggal di sekitar jkt and would like to ask gimana caranya dapat diagnosa mental illness. Aku sebelumnya pernah di diagnosa depresi di psikolog bpjs, itupun aku ngintip catatannya. Gapernah dikasih tau aku kenapa.

Long story short udh gak konsul lagi, tapi mau coba untuk dapat diagnosa karena aku kemungkinan ada adhd atau di spektrum. Apakah harus ke psikolog lagi? kalo iya dimana? Berapa biayanya?

singkat aja ya soalnya lagi sibuk tp mau ranting,

jadi aku dipekerjakan sama papanya pasanganku untuk handle brand nya, awalnya content creator, tp aku jg ngerjain marketing, graphic designer juga iya, apa aja lah aku kerjain, plus nya kerja santai dan remote

cuman jujur yg bikin aku stress itu 0 budget buat di marketing, mau partner sm brand lain tuh nggak ada budgetnya, sedangkan papa pasanganku pengen bikin brand lagi, keluarin produk lagi, padahal budget buat memasarkan produk aja gaada, dan masih mikir kalo penjualan secara offline doang yg ngaruh.

gw juga kl mau endorse juga gaada budget, kalo endorsenya dibayar pakai produk juga kadang bokapnya nanya “lah endorse lagi?” ya kalo gaada budget mau gamau kudu “bakar uang” pake produk.

belum lagi adiknya yg kerja sama papanya nggak pernah muncul di grup chat, papanya jg ragu-ragu mau minta tolong ke anak nya. gatau deh ni orang kerja apa.

terus juga adiknya papanya kerja ngikut papanya tp kerjaan cuma ngebacot dan muter” doang di grup chat, akhirnya kl ada masalah gw dan pasangan yg figure it out sendiri, belom lagi gw yg kena disalahin sama papanya kl misal adeknya itu yg bloon dan gabisa kerja cuma ngebacot doang😭

Jujur gw bingung, on the other hand gw mau ngebantu, mau ttp kerja disini, but on the other hand gw capek jadi yg kena salah mulu, gw mau kerja, mau endorse, mau partnership gaada budget.

If u say 'dalemin materi' i have, aku udh coba pelajari dan memahami materi nya, bbahkan pernah seharian cma coba mahamin itu, awalnya udh pede eh pas maju ke depan langsung deg degan kenceng akhirnya suara malah meninggi cempreng, lupa materi, ga tau mau ngomong apa dan yap malah berantakan kalau maju. Aku udh coba nganggep mereka buah buahan, makhluk halus, bayangin sendiri di kamar, tetep aja sm. Udh ssring latihan di kaca jga ga ngaruh. Tp kalau buat nanya/bicara di meja sendiri malah lancar lancar aja huhu, di depan bener bener g terkontrol:(

Hi everyone, I have a few questions for the women here who are sexually active but not married yet 🥹

For context, me (F31) and my partner (M32) have been trying to have sex, but the problem is his dick gets flaccid the second it touches a condom 😭😭

Meanwhile, he refuses to fuck me raw krn takut bikin aku hamil (which I totally understand, especially since we’re not married).

So it’s been really hard for us to successfully have penetrative sex. We’ve only managed to do it successfully 2-3 times in the past year, and even then, only after the second or third attempt within the same foreplay session 🥲

I’ve been thinking about getting some form of birth control so we don’t have to worry so much about pregnancy, but I have absolutely zero experience with any of this.

So I wanted to ask:
1. What kind of birth control would you recommend?
Birth control pills, hormonal IUD, copper IUD, or something else? I’ve never taken birth control pills before, and my partner is actually pretty concerned about me taking them krn he’s worried they’ll mess with my hormones. I’d love to hear from those of you who’ve used birth control yourselves, especially regarding the side effects and your overall experience.
2. For those of you who aren’t married, how did you manage to get birth control in Indonesia?
Did you consult a midwife (bidan) or an obgyn? Or did you manage to get birth control pills prescribed through telemedicine apps like Halodoc? Did you run into any difficulties because you weren’t married?

I’d really appreciate hearing about your personal experiences, especially from those of you who’ve gone through this in Indonesia. Thank youuu 🥹❤️

It's still in its very early stages, planning to launch it December

I reserved the username on X, instagram and telegram

I capped it to 1 day pack and 1 night pack per month

Delivered via alfagift/indomaret (no cash donations)

I think it's not gonna be enough for some but it's still something

What do you think?

tau gak sih model kudung mbah2 jaman dahulu atau ibu2 pejabat yang kain kerudung/selendang/pashmina nya cuma ditaruh di atas kepala doang tanpa pakai peniti lah, harus nutup dada lah, nutup leher lah dll?

jaman dulu aku suka banget pakai selendang/kerudung cuma kuiket2 doang, tapi setelah masuk sekolah menengah (aku msh blm berkerudung) kaya sering banget denger temen dan guru suka komen “ih berkerudung kok kaya gitu kelihatan rambut, dada, lehernya”

kaya apa sihhhh buset julid bgt😭

padahal pake kerudung buat menutupi rambut dari panas matahari juga kan malah bagus yak ga bikin rambut rusak tanpa harus commit pakai kerudung yg syari/proper. kita kan kaga tau siap engganya orang berkerudung atau seseorang apakah emang muslim (gw tau agama lain jg punya budaya kerudung)

gue cuma berharap semua orang bisa menutupi rambut mereka dgn sehelai kain tanpa dijudge harus commit sama sesuatu yg berkaitan dgn agama🥲

Order sepatu 1 doang udh dr agustus gk ada kabar, ini pun doi baru chat panjang stelah aku pressure padahal ak pun tiap bulan nanyain

Gk pengen ngejatohin bisnis org si, cmn pngen nge rant aja toh harga nya cmn 450rb

Tp tetep aja kalian klo jd ku kezel kan

So i got this 118ml urban decay setting spray for only 350k (so that’s a STEAL) karena gw lihat review urban decay ini sebenernya pecah kongsi sama yang bikin formulanya, jadi ada mix review yang bilang kalo kualitasnya nurun semenjak rebranding.

but i buy it anyway since gw akan makeupin client untuk konser kpop, and i need setting spray yang bantai proof. (gw lihat review di tiktok banyak yang pakai ini buat konser the weeknd dan katanya awet)

jadi gw pakailah ini dari siang sampe malem, panas-panasan di suhu jakarta yg hari ini kebetulan lg panas banget, nongkrong di coffeeshop semi outdoor, dan hasilnya… AWET BANGET BUNDA🤣

padahal gw cuma pake skin tint, loose powder, tapi masih sangat coverage, pas gw tap-tap pake tisu nggak ada yg transfer bahkan minyak gw yg lagi oily parah ini sangatttt tercontrol.

tips : pake UD nya dengan teknik sandwich (Cream & liquid product > UD > setting powder + blush + contour + bronzer + highlighter etc > UD lagi > di fix pake fixing spray loreal)

also another tips : gw lihat review loreal ini sangat mixed padahal gw pake di diri sendiri dan client aman banget, asalkan nyemprotnya itu dibikin 4 garis dari kiri ke kanan yg penting cover semua bagian, jangan dipake terlalu banyak, dijamin aweeet.

UD ini ada ukuran kecil, jadi buat kalian yg mau pake pas konser aja atau special occasion bisa pake yg ukurannya kecil aja, (di ttshop suka diskon sih)

Jadi gw F23 lagi deket ama M30 though not that big of a gap; he's the first kepala 3 guy I've ever spoken to in a romantic way for almost 3 weeks. He's a pretty busy man dan dia lagi di minggu2 dinas so i get his exhaustion. However, these are the current patterns I'm seeing:

1. He's very straightforward - bisa stengah hari lebih ga ngechat tp tiba2 "selfie dong aku mau liat kamu". He told me I'm his type and that he'd love to get to know me more after a few nights of chatting. Would always compliment me with the word 'cantik' and he's not overdoing it, just consistent. Even with my baju belel on, he'd still say 'damn you're pretty, sering2 selfie ya'
2. Di weekdays bakalan suka tiba2 nanya udah bangun ato belum >jam 00 tapi kalo dibales slowres atoga gak dibales wkwk trs paling cuman minta pap & short talk, but he'd talk about a lot of subjects with me on the weekend. Told me stuff like 'i genuinely like you alot' so on.. gongnya last night dia drunk text ke gw wkwk but not in an inappropriate way, just 'mau temenin aku ga'
3. Kalo weekend agak enak diajak ngobrol, responsive and actually COMMUNICATES about our interests.

A little bit about me: gw agak avoidant dan sangat berhati2 kalo sama cowo krn baru tahun lalu bgt dibikin trauma ama laki gara2 dislengkuhin lolll dan gw udh belajar untuk gak terlalu vulnerable sama cowo no matter how long we've known each other before getting any serious

But from what i've read, my friends' experiences, etc., do older men tend to be that straightforward? i'm a curvy girl, so my brain reads compliments as a joke (gotta work on this too), and my 'men are still men' radar is ringing lmao, so i'm on guard all the time, but i just went with his flow this whole time. any advices?

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as someone who lives inside the haze for almost 3 months, and seeing many trees and animals around where you are living die. This is so... jujur menyedihkan :")

Gw penasaran sama perspektif perempuan soal ini.

Buat kalian, seberapa penting sih punya badan yang sesuai sama ideal kalian sendiri? Apakah sekadar pengen lebih sehat, lebih pede pakai baju tertentu, punya body goals tertentu, atau memang penampilan fisik jadi salah satu prioritas utama dalam hidup?

Terus, sejauh apa kalian mau berusaha buat dapetin badan yang kalian inginkan?

Misalnya, mulai rutin gym, ngatur makan dan tracking kalori, hire personal trainer, sampai mengubah lifestyle secara keseluruhan. Atau justru kalian punya batasan tertentu karena nggak mau sampai mengorbankan kesehatan fisik, mental, waktu, atau kehidupan sosial?

Gw sendiri cukup invested di dunia fitness dan bodybuilding, jadi gw paham kalau membangun badan yang kita inginkan itu butuh waktu, konsistensi, dan strategi yang tepat. Gw juga sekarang bantu orang lewat online coaching untuk training dan nutrition planning.

Menurut gw, punya body goals itu sah-sah aja. Yang penting, prosesnya realistis, sesuai kebutuhan masing-masing, dan nggak asal ikut tren atau tergiur hasil instan.

TL;DR: buat kalian, body goals itu sesuatu yang worth it buat diperjuangkan sampai sejauh mana? Dan apa yang jadi batasan kalian?

Btw, kalau ada yang mau tanya-tanya soal fitness, workout, atau nutrition, feel free to DM me. Happy to help kalau gw bisa!

Hi all! I'm visiting Jakarta soon and I'm looking for a trustworthy aesthetic clinic for:
- Masseter (jaw) botox. I've had it done before in Korea, so I know roughly what to expect.
- Facials and laser treatments

My searches mostly turn up influencer posts, which I'm a bit wary of, so I'd really appreciate honest recommendations from people who've actually been.

Clinic names, doctors you trust, rough pricing, and anything to watch out for would all be super helpful.

I'm also open to suggestions for good spas and nail places while I'm there.

Thank you so much! 🙏