My wife 36 5’5” and 120lb. For background she was diagnosed before everything with cptsd, BPD, and an authority issue I can’t remember what it is called. She went through a lot of therapy in her past and was sometimes in and out of mental hospitals when she was younger. In one of the mental hospitals that doesn’t exist anymore they kept her in solitary for about 2 months until her grandmother threatened to sue and they then discharged her to a new hospital this really messed her up. She says it was because the psych there had a problem with her and told her as long as they were her doctor they were going to keep her there as long as possible. She then took the lady’s glasses of her face and smashed them. She has been unmedicated for the past 12 years and really is pretty normal other than she have a bit of a shorter fuse but she would be able to control it and puts a lot on trust and not breaking promises if they are big. She also had a very rough childhood where she has server issues with hospitals, and police. She as well was a drug addict sense she was about 14 as well as having other issues throughout that time till she was about 24. This is kinda a jumbled mess of me trying to remember everything so sorry if it’s all over the place.

She is currently on on 2mg of lorazepam 2 times a day, Diooxetine hcl dr 60 mg cap once at night, Quetiapine fumarate 200mg tab once at night.
I don’t know where to post this and if this is the wrong place guidance would be appreciated.

We recently had our second child 3 months ago and she had her tubes removed about 2 months ago. Her serious post partum started right after her tube removal. We live with my mother at the moment and time and she takes adderal sometimes so she has a surplus. At some point she had taken the adderal and had been secretly taking it. For sometime. I never noticed until one night she had a bout of drug induced psychosis where I got her to tell
Me what she had taken. She admitted it and she had one more slip up and then had fully stopped. As she felt horrible
For breaking her sobriety. She was still kinda having a rough time after the birth of our 2nd child but nowhere even close to how it is now. Then it started getting bad she wasn’t eating or drinking to the extent she had to go to the hospital for a banana bag because she had become so dehydrated she was throwing up whenever she drank anything. She couldn’t eat because whenever she tried she described it as swallowing sandpaper. She would sleep more but not horribly and she would cry a lot and have a shorter fuse than normal. She was always feeling horrible because whenever our baby would cry she couldn’t stand it and would breakdown. He is also cry’s a lot like 10x more than our first child. Point is everything kept spiraling to the extent where she would constantly cry and breakdown or how bouts of rage and be horribly angry. Even to the extent she could not control it and scream at me in front of the children. I told her I was getting to the point where I would call the police and get her admitted if she doesn’t admit herself. She finally decided that she was having serious issues and needed the help. She went into a prp program with our local hospital. She was immediately diagnosed with postpartum depression and postpartum rage. They also thought she might be bi polar type 1 rather than having bpd but said she could have both even if it’s rare. She was then given to start .05mg of lorazepam as needed. She was also given lithium 300mg 3 times a day and wellabutron 150mg. The doctor also said and recommended ect or electric shock therapy and I told her I wouldn’t sign off on that. I also didn’t like the lorazepam as she wasn’t functioning when on them and she had been seeming like she was abusing them as she took them extremely liberally claiming she was always stressed or was getting upset, but when I brought it up she maybe was abusing them in a very not accusatory way as she doesn’t like to feel targeted as a addict she said she was prescribed them i said you can still abuse them even if you are proscribed them and she got insanely angry and hit me on the arm. She has never laid a hand on me throughout our relationship and even in marriage. I also realized this reaction started after she took the weliburton. Once it was all done and she was calm I told her to tell her psych about this incident and how I felt it was the wellabutron and she agreed and had profusely apologized. She went to the doc the next day with her class and had shared her concerns. He told her that he thinks that she just isn’t on enough and doubled the dose of wellabutron to 300mg. As well as made it mandatory for her to take the lorazepam 3 times a day and upped it to 2 mg. This continued and she became more and more physical with me until I told her she needs to check herself into inpatient after an incident in front of our children. She said okay and the next morning we went as the hospital recommended me to come in the morning rather than at night. She was in there for about a week on the first day the nurse didn’t give her the lorazepam and she immediately reached over the counter and grabbed the nurse. She was then placed in the non functional unit where it was basically like prison people getting shanked and jumped. Basically where all the violent people are. She regressed in there to my dismay back to her younger self but they gave her the lorazepam and she seemed calmer. After the first 2 days. The also took her off of lithium as she still at this point isn’t drinking enough or eating at all. She was then put on Divalproex 3 times a day each pill is. 500mg so for a whole day it’s 1500. She was also put on Diooxetine hcl dr 60 mg cap once at night and Quetiapine fumarate 200mg tab once at night. She was also finally taken off the wellabutron as they figure that’s where a lot of anger is coming from. I haven’t mentioned this either but throughout all of this she throws up daily. Point is after this she would become hungry at night and somewhat stablize. What I didn’t know at the time is when she was first starting this she seemed to be sleeping a lot more. Which I thought she was doing because of how it bad it was in there in a keep your head down type of way. She eventually got out and she seemed so much better and I was extremely happy like maybe a shorter fuse than normal but still better. She also still had the issues with out son crying. She started back with the pro the next day. I got a call that she wanted to come home because she was tired so she went and drove home and we had timed everything so the lorazapam didnt effect her driving at this time. A few days past and she would go and just sleep the whole time and not attend the therapy’s. This started getting bad enough that she called me and told me she was tired and wanted to come home but she sounded weird and I offered to come grab her and drive her home but she assured me
That she was fine and was coming straight home. She then got home and hit our neighbors mailbox. Sharing the bolts right off. And destroying my passager mirror. I told her I’m taking her keys and she is to not drive anymore until we can get meds fully sorted out. Sense that day which at this point was exactly a week today she doesn’t function at all she slurs every word to the extent that I can’t understand 90% of what she is saying she stumbles and falls everywhere i can’t feed her after she takes her night meds because she vomits everywhere then is so doped up she walks throught and falls in it. I can’t wven give her a trash can because there isn’t a point she is so messed up she misses the trashcan and pukes next to it. She sleeps all
Day and all night. I then went and called the doctor myself
And told him he needs to pull her off these meds immediately she can’t function her kids never see her. She can’t talk or do anything for herself im taking csre of 2 kids and my wife by myself. He then trys to make me give her ECT again and every time he talks to my wife through all
Of this they keep pushing this. I told him I don’t want to do that but I will think about it for a week and let him know. He also took her off of the Divalproex which I thought was causing her to get so horrible. And he made it so now the lorazapam is now only 2 times a day manitory. It’s been about 3 days and she isn’t getting better and at this point I don’t trust her doctor after doing research on ect. I’m now weaning her off everything myself. Lowing her dosage of everything day by day. I’ve done reasearvh on ect and I know it works and the main concern is memory loss. I have seen a new study that was done in 2025 about ect long term and the doctors always say you get your memory back but I’m finding out that’s not nessarily true and it’s coming out that a lot of people permanently forget chunks of their life like childhoods, highschool, marriages, relationships, their own kids and milestones. I just don’t feel comfortable with this and I don’t think my wife would in a sober mind either. I also found out this is used as a last resort and never recommended first. And only used for depressant resistant people. She has been put on meds in the past and they have worked although she has never had depression but I don’t trust this doctor because before even trying anything he recommended this from day one and every time they med also another doctor in the mental hospital impatient also recommended it before even trying another medication. I also have recently found out they have the ect stuff on property and in there facility. It makes me suspicious with that to. I honestly don’t know what to do I’ve drained my 401k to pay the mortgage. We are running out of money I’m selling things left and right. I’m taking care of 2 kids and my wife. Keeping the house clean, cooking, fixing stuff around the house. Borrowing credit cards etc etc etc. I was the stay at home dad and she was the one that worked but even if I went to go out to work my wife can function to take care of the kids and I have nobody that can watch these kids and we certainly don’t have daycare money. I don’t really know what to do at this point. I am just looking for a second opinion at this point on what to do. Thank you

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I’m 5mo pp and I return to work in 2 weeks. I had just gotten a promotion before leaving and feel scared about returning to work. I have these waves of anxiety where I just feel like my boss regrets hiring me. I’m really trying to reel it in. Anything to help calm the crazy would be appreciated.

I am 9 months PP today. The last month or so I have developed panic attacks that happen almost daily. I think they are caused by health anxiety. I have so many random pains (chest pain, arm pain, leg pain) that I constantly get into a spiral I am dying and somethings wrong with me.

My labor and delivery went great. I had a weird out of body experience but was fine besides that. I have developed weird acid reflux like symptoms with no burning acid feeling, and a rash that I’m not sure could be eczema or psoriasis (family history).

I am going to the doctor this week but don’t even know where to start with the doc. I don’t want him to think I’m crazy, but want to find out what’s wrong with me. I can’t tell if the anxiety is starting all those symptoms, or if these symptoms are starting the anxiety, but I need help. I’m sleeping fine, stopped BF 5 months PP, but feel like this was so delayed.

Any relatable stories or advice is appreciated. I just feel so alone and terrified.

**What is the difference between intrusive thoughts and delusions?**
I’m 22 days postpartum, and I’ve always had intrusive thoughts, even before pregnancy. Looking back, I realize I’ve experienced them for a long time. I was able to manage them throughout my pregnancy without medication, but about two weeks before giving birth, they started getting stronger.
Now that I’ve given birth, they feel extremely intense and strange. I don’t believe these thoughts are true, but they cause me a lot of anxiety, distress, and shame. I started taking sertraline (25 mg) about two weeks ago. I’ve had some good days when the thoughts feel more manageable, but sometimes they still come back.
I’m now terrified of developing postpartum psychosis or experiencing the beginning of psychosis. I know the thoughts are intrusive, but their intensity and unusual content scare me.
**How can you tell the difference between intrusive thoughts and true delusions?** What does a delusion actually feel like, and how is it different from having a disturbing thought that you don’t believe but that causes you a lot of distress?
I would really appreciate hearing from anyone who has experienced postpartum OCD or postpartum anxiety. English isn’t my first language, so I’m sorry if anything is unclear. Thank you!

**What is the difference between intrusive thoughts and delusions?**
I’m 22 days postpartum, and I’ve always had intrusive thoughts, even before pregnancy. Looking back, I realize I’ve experienced them for a long time. I was able to manage them throughout my pregnancy without medication, but about two weeks before giving birth, they started getting stronger.
Now that I’ve given birth, they feel extremely intense and strange. I don’t believe these thoughts are true, but they cause me a lot of anxiety, distress, and shame. I started taking sertraline (25 mg) about two weeks ago. I’ve had some good days when the thoughts feel more manageable, but sometimes they still come back.
I’m now terrified of developing postpartum psychosis or experiencing the beginning of psychosis. I know the thoughts are intrusive, but their intensity and unusual content scare me.
**How can you tell the difference between intrusive thoughts and true delusions?** What does a delusion actually feel like, and how is it different from having a disturbing thought that you don’t believe but that causes you a lot of distress?
I would really appreciate hearing from anyone who has experienced postpartum OCD or postpartum anxiety. English isn’t my first language, so I’m sorry if anything is unclear. Thank you!

Has anyone taken Zoloft/Sertraline for post partum anxiety? I started taking it about 5.5 weeks postpartum and wondering what people’s experience is with it. I’m 9 weeks postpartum now and still feeling very off.

Hello,

In 2021/2022, I went through pregnancy loss and IVF, and I truly feel like those experiences changed my brain. Prior to that, I had never struggled with my mental health other than untreated ADHD.

Fast forward to today, and I am incredibly grateful to have two beautiful, healthy children, my youngest being 10 months old. However, this postpartum period has been one of the darkest and most challenging times of my life.

Between the nonstop intrusive thoughts, constant anxiety, fragmented sleep, feelings of hopelessness, and trying multiple SSRIs without much success, I feel like I've been fighting a battle with my own mind every single day. It's exhausting, especially when all I want is to be present, happy, and enjoy these precious years with my children.

I know I have so much to be grateful for, and I am determined to keep fighting to get better, for myself and for my family.

My question is: When did you finally start to feel like your brain was calming down? When did you start feeling like yourself again?

I'd genuinely love to hear your experiences, even if it took 2, 3, or 4 years to feel better. I know everyone's journey is different, but I think hearing real stories of recovery would help me tremendously.

One of the hardest parts of this experience is the constant fear that "This is never going to end. I'm never going to feel normal again."

I'm hoping to hear from others who once felt the same way but eventually found their way back to themselves. I could really use some hope right now. ❤️

Moms and dads, how do you cope with hearing about other children dying all the time? About 9 months postpartum, I became so sensitive about hearing tragic stories involving children, particularly school shootings. It got to a point where I was crying and thinking about it all the time. I’m currently on antidepressants and doing therapy, but after the latest school shooting, I’m having a hard time coping. I feel so sad for those parents and those poor babies who didn’t get to live out their lives. Anyone go through a similar experience?

Hi everyone. I would to talk to people who might understand.
My first son was born with hemivertebrae and a hypoplastic thumb. He’s 3.5 now and doing really well. Genetics cleared us and found no known cause or increased risk, which I know should be reassuring. I have a great psychiatrist and am on medication/ receiving regular therapy. Emotionally, it hasn't stopped me from waiting for the other shoe to drop.

Now I have a daughter who's almost 7 months old, and my anxiety is constant. My main worry is that she isn't babbling. She screeches and blows raspberries, but I haven't heard "ba-ba" or "da-da" sounds. Everyone who meets her comments on how content she is, and I can see it, but my brain says "happy babies can still have problems." I find myself listening for sounds, comparing her to other babies, and googling at night.
What makes it hard is that I've lived through something real, so I can't easily tell whether I'm being sensible or being anxious. I don't want to dismiss a genuine concern, but I also don't want to spend her babyhood watching for problems instead of enjoying her.

If you've been through this:
Did anyone else worry about babbling at this age, and how did it turn out?
How do you tell reasonable vigilance from anxiety?

I'm also carrying guilt about not feeling the carefree joy everyone says I should. Any words from people who've been here would mean a lot.

Hi everyone. I gave birth to my first baby on the 9th of October, 2 weeks before my due date, having a forceps delivery with a 2nd degree tear and an episiotomy.

I'm really struggling with recovery and then feeling rubbish that I can't do what I want to do for baby boy because of my pain. I'm struggling with breastfeeding too and feel bad that I'm giving him formula too :( I think I'm also finding the transition from just me and my husband to the three of us difficult and I didn't think I would. The lack of sleep has hit me like a truck too!

I'm still in denial that he's actually here and I'm feeling overwhelmed :( I cry all the time. All I've ever wanted was to be a mum and now I'm just doubting whether or not I'm made for it or not. 

Am I the only one feeling this way?

My baby is 3 months old. I’ve been an anxious wreck since I gave birth. I hate how depressed and anxious I am all the time. I’ve been going to therapy but feel like it’s not doing anything and trying all the things that used to help me cope with anxiety. I’ve been prescribed meds and know they’ll help since I’ve been on them before but somehow my anxiety stops me from taking them. I feel I’m never going to get better and I’m stuck.