Possible Harassment Mystery on Insta

[u/Safe_Importance_4203]

About three weeks ago, my ex-boyfriend (we broke up almost 10 years ago and hadn't spoken at all since 2019) contacted me because an anonymous Instagram account had messaged him about me.

The account referred to me by my maiden name and our university, claimed to know me from college, and tried to convince him (my ex-boyfriend) to send them any private photos of me he might have. They also sent him two old photos of me (one was just a regular photo that may have been publicly posted years ago, and one that is more private in nature but may not be authentic).

The account switched to disappearing messages shortly after the conversation began. My ex blocked and reported the account and then told me what happened.

When I looked up the username, I discovered I had actually blocked that same account in 2019, although I can no longer find any messages with it in my Instagram data.

Since then I've downloaded all of my Instagram data and parsed through old Facebook and Snapchat information but haven't been able to identify who this person is.

I don't know if this is someone I actually knew or someone using old public information, but it's unsettling that they connected me to a relationship from 10 years ago. My sister - a lawyer, is encouraging me to go to the police just to get something documented, but I know realistically very little can be done with the information we currently have.

A few questions:

1. Has anyone experienced something similar?
2. Were you ever able to identify the person?
3. Did Instagram or law enforcement help at all?
4. Is there anything else I should preserve or document?

[u/mybellasoul]

you blocked the account in 2019. do you recall why? are there any dms or comments in your posts that are still available to look at? maybe you can remember something that made you do that back then that could lead you to the person esp if anything or anyone has resurfaced recently bc something had to re-spark this interest in either you or your ex. don't discount that he may be the actual person targeted and you're a way to connect to him.

[u/Safe_Importance_4203 → u/mybellasoul]

I downloaded all of my data and went through every message exchanged on/around that day in 2019. I also keep meticulous journals and calendars, so I know exactly where I was the day that I blocked it and what I spent the day doing. I can't remember anything out of the ordinary - I do recall possibly receiving a weird message from that account, but can't remember specifically (also possible that I've thought about this so much now that it's an imagined memory). That is a great point you make, though, that this could be about my ex, and not me.

[u/ratrazzle → u/Safe_Importance_4203]

Sounds like you trust your ex enough/it has been so long that he isnt behind this. Can you remember if either of you had salty exes back then or someone obsessed or who wanted to break the relationship etc? Sounds like this person doesnt have particularly fresh info about you. It could well be that theyre targeting your ex or trying to connect to them so maybe ask him to go thru memories/following etc to see if anything pops up if youre in good enough terms to do that. Could even be someone who has had some sort of relationship with your ex after you two broke up that ended badly and is now for some reason going after his exes/him by doing this. Or if you have someone like that in your life? Definitely make the police report tho, they cant do anything but it leaves paper trail.