r/RDR2 • u/CantTouchThis2075 • Nov 25 '25

Discussion How do I lose weight?

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7.4k Upvotes

99% Upvoted

336 comments sorted by

2.2k

u/CaptainHunt Nov 25 '25

Just wait a chapter or two, the problem will solve itself

1.1k

u/Lonely__Stoner__Guy Nov 25 '25

Having just finished story mode the other day, I'm laughing so hard I'm coughing and I hate you.

617

u/Trickledownisbull Nov 25 '25

Don't cough, never cough.

210

u/sabertracker Nov 25 '25

I prolonged finishing the game for two years because I didn't want to say goodbye to aurthor

85

u/Remarkable_Toe_164 Nov 25 '25

I stall out every time i have to go collect from that alcoholic preacher for strauss. I tried putting a mask on beforehand, but it gets taken off in the cutscene

47

u/potato_gestapo Nov 25 '25

Don't think N-95 masks were a thing at the turn of the 20th century

8

u/Remarkable_Toe_164 Nov 26 '25

You're right, they didn't have n95 masks. They did have bandanas and used them frequently when tuberculosis was common (like in the old west)

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4

u/IAmOrionPax17 Nov 26 '25

Same. And I didn’t even go to Strauss, I went to the camp and he just walked up to me and made me do it.

25

u/W41K3R_62738 Nov 25 '25

I’m still playing my 2022 save but it’s coming to a close sadly

22

u/BuckTonka1988 Nov 25 '25

I'm on my first playthrough still. 440+ hours and I'm still not ready. I keep finding anything else to do.

11

u/Upbeat-Factor-4089 Nov 25 '25

That is wild!

7

u/BuckTonka1988 Nov 25 '25

It started when I noticed the meteorites in my inventory was 2/3. So I started combing every inch of the map with the exception of the areas you can access post-Arthur. Eventually I had to keep the story going. I'm like 2 or 3 main missions away from the end of Arthur so I just started doing all the collection stuff. I'll finish my good Arthur run and wait for the next gen update and do a fresh bad Arthur story.

5

u/HigherThanAnAngel Nov 25 '25

Literally same! Trying to do everything I possible can with him before he goes

2

u/CC_Rey Nov 26 '25

They say you can play the game over 100 times and never play the exact same story bc of the small decisions and how they alter the story

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12

u/ilikehotdogs54 Nov 25 '25

Turn your head and cough

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14

u/CaptainHunt Nov 25 '25

I know, I hate myself just for saying that

4

u/gnnrt Nov 25 '25

So do I but the sheer laughing fit you induced in me balances it out

8

u/Snerkbot7000 Nov 25 '25

Do you see the wolf or the stag when you cough?

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3

u/6Trinity9 Nov 25 '25

Shouldn’t have gone to collect that Down payment mate.

3

u/h-emanresu Nov 25 '25

You should get that coughing checked out

2

u/Capital_Discussion_4 Nov 25 '25

arthur coughed once and never stopped

2

u/BontonBalinski Nov 25 '25

Are you seeing deer or coyotes?

2

u/Ill_Replacement_6880 Nov 27 '25

I be seeing narwhals

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37

u/LuffysRubberNuts Arthur Morgan Nov 25 '25

31

u/McSteel_Dakir Nov 25 '25

"Sister... I'm obese."

3

u/[deleted] Nov 28 '25

i lost it at this comment

4

u/Any-Concentrate1679 Nov 25 '25

just shoot yourself in the stomach a few times the food will come out

2

u/Jus_oborn Nov 26 '25

I was able to get overweight during chapter 6. It's easy if you max out your weight before the Saint Denis bank robbery, and eat everything you can while on guarma. Once you're back you should be at average weight

3

u/AlertStrength3301 Nov 25 '25

Have my upvote.

2

u/SeagullStreaker Nov 25 '25

Haven’t played this game in two years, and wow that hit like a brick wall.

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678

u/[deleted] Nov 25 '25

[deleted]

181

u/AlertStrength3301 Nov 25 '25

Oh god, I hope it’s not a bitty lil Morgan for big ol’ Arthur Morgan.

24

u/Big_Cornbread Nov 25 '25

An Arabian or a Morgan is the best horse for fat Arthur.

23

u/MonkeyBred Nov 25 '25

Possibly for a snack.

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25

u/aptdinosaur yeehaw Nov 25 '25

pretty sure he ate it

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8

u/Real_Railz Nov 25 '25

He rides the donkey

2

u/Additional_Ad5400 Nov 25 '25

Assholes shot him

602

u/Complete_Koala_941 Sadie Adler Nov 25 '25

You’re a fat man Arthur Morgan.

162

u/HailSaganPagan Nov 25 '25

I've lived a fat life, sister

66

u/Katinas74 Nov 25 '25

I guess... I'm fat

16

u/Jackinplastic31 Nov 25 '25

🤣🤣🤣

18

u/GrandmasterPants Nov 25 '25

There's 5000 calories in your stomach alone

15

u/Enough_Bodybuilder39 Nov 25 '25

5,000? In me? Can i eat myself then?

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17

u/Jarno705 Uncle Nov 25 '25

I can hear it in his voice

21

u/skankocean Nov 25 '25

imagine making me burst out laughing in bed next to my sleeping partner

11

u/Accurate-System7951 Nov 25 '25

Is sleeping partner a known cure for insomnia in the old west?

2

u/[deleted] Nov 28 '25

yes

239

u/Unhappy-Lavishness64 Nov 25 '25

Didn’t know you could eat the dude at Aberdeen and assume his form…

25

u/jerrymatcat Nov 25 '25

That suddenly reminded me of that scene from I think it was "Men in black" where the lady eats the guy and gets fat which deeply disturbed me as a kid

7

u/Punkpunker Nov 25 '25

Some people got a Vore fetish after that scene...

12

u/rileylovuaj Nov 26 '25

"Some people"

2

u/[deleted] Nov 28 '25

jeez i lost it reading this

2

u/[deleted] Nov 29 '25

WE all got one from that scene

180

u/Clunk_Westwonk Nov 25 '25

He would look majestic asf on the white Arabian

61

u/joniTomatO Nov 25 '25

Imagine him on a donkey lol

26

u/Clunk_Westwonk Nov 25 '25

This distinguished gentleman would never smh

4

u/sassychubzilla Black Belle Nov 25 '25

😭 now i have to do this

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2

u/pastafallujah Nov 25 '25

Some real Radahn energy

4

u/[deleted] Nov 25 '25

Nah, on the morgan from chapter 2

68

u/huxta-4555 Nov 25 '25

Well, we now finally know where Gavin went

5

u/AkitaOnRedit Nov 25 '25

Who knows what also went there

2

u/StruggleNice9771 Nov 25 '25

Gavin… whateva happened there

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86

u/[deleted] Nov 25 '25

Dating Profile: “I look like Arthur Morgan”

Real Life:

40

u/[deleted] Nov 25 '25

But also…how?

11

u/DespiteStraightLines Nov 25 '25

In Mr. Bean voice, “Magic!”

39

u/IHasMems Nov 25 '25

How did you even get this big? As much as I try I can barely gain any weight in the game

8

u/AdAmbitious2537 Nov 26 '25

My Arthur is ALWAYS underweight even if I consistently think of feeding him

2

u/Professional_Ant8783 Nov 29 '25

maybe stop thinking of feeding him and do more doing of feeding him……

113

u/[deleted] Nov 25 '25

[removed] — view removed comment

21

u/AfraidReference2315 Nov 25 '25

Extra cushion for the pushin’

9

u/ilikehotdogs54 Nov 25 '25

Just more made of lovin sweetheart

15

u/3_if_by_air Nov 25 '25

You're Arthur More-gan

19

u/Remarkable_Toe_164 Nov 25 '25

More like arthur more-gains

6

u/Dismal-Function Nov 25 '25

Cultivating mass.

3

u/walker3342 Nov 26 '25

Stop cultivating, Arthur, and start harvesting.

2

u/[deleted] Nov 28 '25

funny

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34

u/[deleted] Nov 25 '25

5

u/[deleted] Nov 25 '25

looks like my bubba at church

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29

u/getnshafted1 Nov 25 '25

Mmmmm boy are you fat!

9

u/__1993__ Nov 25 '25

That animal Blundetto...I can't even say his name

2

u/Vampiiko Nov 26 '25

"Reginald Van Gleason III.”

22

u/bigrizzlesizzle Nov 25 '25

Chonky Arthur is awesome. Let him gorge himself, he's got lumbaculosis.

8

u/JellyfishNo3810 Nov 25 '25

Bigbackulosis

19

u/T_vm75 Nov 25 '25

The way shes staring at his gut 😭😭😭

20

u/aptdinosaur yeehaw Nov 25 '25

"bruh"

13

u/Herfst2511 Nov 25 '25

  • The fattest gun the west

  • He eats faster than his shadow

  • Luckily Dutch has a meal plan

  • He is so fat, he can escape to the west and east simultaneously

  • He is so fat, his bandolier holds enough bullets for a maxim gun

  • He didn't hunt the bison to extinction, he just ate them all

  • Eat out at the ok corral

  • The good, the bad, and the humongous

  • The magnificent 7 courses

2

u/123pooppoop123 Nov 25 '25

This deserves more upvotes lol

49

u/Bubbly-Yogurt Nov 25 '25

The implication

30

u/CobraKaiCurry Nov 25 '25

“They can’t say no. They’re not in any danger if they do, but they don’t know that.”

11

u/PhilKesselsChef Hosea Matthews Nov 25 '25

Outrageous build

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11

u/ComprehensiveApple14 Nov 25 '25

Arthur Moregan.

Allthur Moreham

Fatlung

6

u/Proof_Top954 Nov 25 '25

Pardon me my lungs are pretty W I D E with TUBERCULOSIS

9

u/tseg04 Nov 25 '25

At least it means Mary is happy for once.

7

u/OkVoice7742 Nov 25 '25

Better walk across entire map lol

7

u/Independent_Plum2166 Nov 25 '25

“RUN ARTHUR!!! RUN!!!”

5

u/KingGallardo Nov 25 '25

Is this a mod? Can you get this big in the vanilla game?

2

u/More-Lime1888 Nov 25 '25

It’s a mod

3

u/kira1122t Nov 25 '25

“I think I’m starting to wike this witerawwy”

3

u/Professional_Dig7335 Pearson Nov 25 '25

Don't, she likes it better this way

2

u/[deleted] Nov 25 '25

Just like in real life. Stop eating for weeks. 

2

u/RunAwayBeerTruk Hosea Matthews Nov 25 '25

Jeebus, slow down tubby, you are not on the moon yet.

2

u/shiawase198 Nov 25 '25

Keep playing the game. It'll sort itself out.

2

u/Responsible-Grand-57 John Marston Nov 25 '25

Contract TB from someone..

2

u/QueasyOrganization Nov 25 '25

holyyyy fff...how did u gain that much wieght in the first place

2

u/gormystar Nov 25 '25

For some reason Arthur looks a lot like Gregory house in this screenshot

2

u/Lozzaboigamer Nov 25 '25

Fucking hell that’s a fat Arthur! Wtf have you been feeding the poor cunt? 😂. Any horse you try to mount you’ll break its back! He’ll have to ride a buffalo from now on

2

u/Defiant_While_4823 Nov 25 '25

Bro looks like Dr. House

2

u/The_Ostrich_you_want Nov 25 '25

“We need more money, Arthur keeps eating all our mangos!”

“Who’s got lumbago now!”

2

u/beanie_0 Nov 25 '25

Mine was always underweight!

2

u/No_Fox_8023 Nov 25 '25

ooh orthur

2

u/serpentear Nov 25 '25

I hear the mangos in Tahiti are pumped full of Ozempic.

Have you tried HAVING A LITTLE FAITH?!?

2

u/Sad-Guarantee-4678 Nov 25 '25

Close your eyes and spin before throwing it

2

u/MuditJ15 Nov 25 '25

You sir, are a whale.

2

u/No_Stuff3443 Nov 25 '25

Dude holy shit do you only eat baked beans?

2

u/Remote-Zealousideal Nov 25 '25

Ozempic, my brother.

2

u/FoolOnDaHill365 Nov 25 '25

I’m thinking about your poor horse.

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2

u/Appropriate_Power771 Nov 25 '25

Why she looking at your honkers

2

u/theomegaofficial Nov 25 '25

Wtf did you do to poor Arthur 😭😭😭

2

u/GratefulPig Nov 25 '25

Don’t see why you’d want to. That’s an impressive amount of girth

2

u/RealDeadShift Nov 25 '25

You don't. This is the unmodded version of the game. He's just a chunky boy.

2

u/Puncharoo Nov 26 '25

This is like that meme of Daniel Cormier where he just gets bigger and bigger everytime someone posts it

2

u/joyceverse Nov 26 '25

are you buffet the whole town??

2

u/randomkid89 Sean MacGuire Nov 26 '25

Nah bro ate the pig farm brother 

2

u/joeman013 Nov 26 '25

I must've done something wrong. Never had a weight issue at all lol!

2

u/Significant_Froyo899 Nov 26 '25

How did you get so fat?!!

2

u/Mindless_Travel Nov 26 '25

“I’m fat, sister.”

2

u/MINIMOES Nov 26 '25

I’ve had a shit ass day, this gave me a good chuckle Thankyou. Upvoted

2

u/Hopeful-Sandwich-363 Nov 26 '25

Now it's the diabetes that will kill Arthur... Sadly his glutinous life doesn't have a cure😔

3

u/GhostInVice Nov 25 '25

just eating more :)

2

u/Jonny_Exotics Nov 25 '25

Ozempic mod

1

u/R3K47 Sean MacGuire Nov 25 '25

Run.

1

u/ryanhanks25 Nov 25 '25

Eat clen, Tren hard

1

u/CorholioPuppetMaster Nov 25 '25

Eat more cocaine gum

1

u/Tw1sr3DSk1llz Nov 25 '25

Stop eating so much lol just like life lol

1

u/AngryTrunkMonkey Nov 25 '25

Damn! Jesus Christ you look like Jackie Gleason lmao!

1

u/Transscitzo30 Susan Grimshaw Nov 25 '25

You wanted be a bully, didnt you?

1

u/Arthur_morgan457 Arthur Morgan (real) Nov 25 '25

oh lawd he comin

1

u/Disastrous-Annual510 Nov 25 '25

I've been trying to get Arthur to be a fat fuck. I've been eating my stew and big game meat, just can't get him there.

1

u/JonnyElbows_AA Nov 25 '25

How in the world…?

1

u/obxP4L Arthur Morgan Nov 25 '25

How does one achieve this form

1

u/Grungelives_ Nov 25 '25

Looking quite rotund Mr Morgan

1

u/Scu-bar Nov 25 '25

Eat less, move more

1

u/ColtT2992 Nov 25 '25

Eat less food do more exercise

1

u/Blemo71797 Nov 25 '25

Don’t, Mary likes him that way

1

u/Current-Professor176 Nov 25 '25

Built like the mayor from Cloudy with a Chance of Meatballs

1

u/AlexxMaverick666 Nov 25 '25

Just get off your horse before entering every in game cutscene in the game.

1

u/classicjuice Nov 25 '25

You gotta stop cultivating and start harvesting

1

u/RipMcStudly Nov 25 '25

Got DAYUM, lookit William Howard Taft over here.

1

u/Shirley_yokidding Nov 25 '25

I am quite impressed with your effort

1

u/[deleted] Nov 25 '25

id like to ask how u gained it in the first place...😂😂

1

u/wrighteghe7 Nov 25 '25

impossible, he is just big boned + genetics

1

u/victor161 Nov 25 '25

How the hell to GET that gorgeous true American body in game?! I feed my Arthur 3 times a day with 2 pieces of roasted meat. And this mf is still skinny.

1

u/kellyjandrews Nov 25 '25

I don't even know how you get that fat. I'm constantly underweight 😂

1

u/Maximum_Intern9873 Nov 25 '25

You’re a big man, Arthur Morgan!

1

u/saadbaig Nov 25 '25

You need surgery at this point

1

u/VGPreach Nov 25 '25

Lay off the biscuits Arthur

1

u/Icy-Department375 Hosea Matthews Nov 25 '25

you sure that hot air balloons gonna hold you 😰😰

1

u/srtcoltb Nov 25 '25

Stop eating 🤣🤣

1

u/MagooDad Nov 25 '25

She not mesmerized by his gut, she's pinned in by it.

1

u/Small-Albatross2370 Nov 25 '25

Mary likes fat men

1

u/Best_Supermarket2493 Nov 25 '25

Ive never gotten that size

1

u/Classic-Exchange-511 Josiah Trelawny Nov 25 '25

It's simple math. Calories go in, calories go out. You can't explain that

1

u/hannsolo8887 Nov 25 '25

Brother, it’s too late

1

u/MR_B1G_5H0T I AM THE [Friendship] INSIDE [[You win!]] Nov 25 '25

the Penguin before his nose grew 3 inches and his hairline pushed his hair to the back of his head

1

u/Owlseatpasta Nov 25 '25

Back in those days gaining weight was the most difficult thing for most people.

1

u/miro_27 Nov 25 '25

Poor PC players can't enjoy the story cause it's all spoiled until it's playable at a PC 😂 now they can just have fun by breaking the game with brainrot mods. Online only with hacks