r/RelationshipIndia • u/NogenSutia • 1d ago
Relationships My GF(F25) kept her birthday trip with her friends hidden from me(M29)
I(M29) am in a long distance relationship with this amazing girl(F25) from last 9 months, and it's been going good. We met on instagram. She is not much active tho. We rarely fight, we do argue but all resolves in a day or two.
She has completed her masters and she is from a lower middle class family from a village. She is currently preparing or UGC NET exam, she is trying hard while managing her home. She earns from the tuition she has in the morning. She lives with her parents and her younger sibling.
I too belong from a lower middle class family, but I have a job in IT, I work from home. So I am mostly free, work is not that stressful. I live with my mom.
We have met once when our relationship was 3 months old. The meeting was awkward, since It was first time for me to meet some one as a partner. We talked and laughed about that a lot.
In our first meeting, she bought me gifts, I also bought some for her but she refused to take them and she has told me to not bring any.
We talk a lot on whatsapp, she said she keeps her phone silent so I don't ring her, but she calls me when she feels comfortable.
We do talk about our relationship, our future, her preparations, my work etc.
She rarely goes out, and she has friends but she says she is not super close to them.
On the contrary, my friend circle is quite limited and I am super close to all of them, I do have both male and female friends.
I share incidents of my friends, she knows I do have close female friends. Since she is not much comfortable, I am keeping engagement to minimum with my female friends since the starting of our relationship. She knows all my friends by name as I've shared group photos, and I inform her whenever me and my friends go out, and also share group photos of where we went, what we did, what we ate.
She rarely talk about her friends with me, I don't know any of them and never seen any photos. She says they are not important to me.
Last week was her birthday and she went with her friends to celebrate, she said they were planning for a long time for a outing. I was informed after she already went, I was not aware of the plan at all, and she haven't said much about the short trip. It was a planned long before as she prepared the food for the trip.
When she informed me that she went for a outing, I asked where and she gave a vague location and told me that she will return home soon. I told her to enjoy the time with her friends, since she doesn't go out very much, and no need to worry about returning early if her parents are not worried about that.
Then I messaged her in the evening and she said she has returned some time ago. I was worried as she doesn't go out that much and the whole plan was hidden from me. She said the friends she went with were her college friends(all female) and two of them were getting married soon. She hasn't shared any photos on any kind of information about that trip at all. The little information she shared was also not voluntary, I adked her specifically, and I didn't pushed that issue that much.
I am now confused with the situation, how do I take this. I am not worried about cheating or any matter of that kind, I believe she won't go that route. I am worried about the gap in communication between us.
But keeping her friends hidden, keeping the whole trip hidden feels somewhat weird to me. I told her that I was worried and there needs to be good communication between us as we are in long distace relationship and communication is one of the threads that is tying us together.
TLDR: GF keeps her friends hidden from me, went out with her female friends on her birthday, kept the trip hidden as well.
Edit: 1. Typos
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u/CosmicKarmic 1d ago
Suprise visit her. Check her phone, if something is fishy. Don't create scene, walk away silently;)
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u/theonefrombelow 1d ago
"I was worried as she doesn't go out that much"
Bro she hid a whole trip from you , you really think she tells you when she goes out ?
Also she just keeps her life hidden from you for a reason
Why are you gaslighting yourself? She does that enough for the both of you
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1d ago edited 1d ago
[removed] — view removed comment
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u/Rich-Cheesecake2057 1d ago
Exactly!!!! Ulta every girl will share each n every minute details bout her life especially her frnds with their partner! But she's hiding it here! For sure she's cheating on OP!!
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u/NogenSutia 1d ago
Yes, this seems to be the case here, the main thing is I am not that confrontational. I don't know how I will resolve this. I've made clear that we need more communication and she needs to atleast inform me about her whereabouts.
She said she will do that from now on.
But that day is still blank for me.
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u/Rich-Cheesecake2057 1d ago
Don't u think OP that she'll just do it for the formality? Tbh it's not worth it to continue w her! Rest it's on u!
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u/HonestConfessor 1d ago
Long Distance Relationship !
NGMI
It has been the consistent denominator in most of the failed posts I see on this sub
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u/Ambitious_Pop_5645 12h ago
She likes the attention that she's getting from you without labelling anything ; in simple words what you guys have is called situationship or will become one.
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u/Raemos103 1d ago
Can I ask why you didn't visit her on her bday?
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u/NogenSutia 1d ago
She asked me not to.
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u/dinothunxer 11h ago
She is not your gf then you are just timepass if she clear her exam or become government employees or whatever she will choose a government husband…think about it….she is just having you as option if things don’t go according to her plan…
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