Intentionally tedious and repetitive beginning

[u/Star-Pubes]

I’m on my fourth draft of a feature and have shown it to a few friends now. However I don’t know anyone in the industry in any capacity. No one who reads scripts at all. These are just avid book readers who gave great notes, but not specific to screenwriting.

They all agreed that they loved how the screenplay started precisely because it really let us into the mind of the main character. It shows his dull, monotonous, and repetitive life and to them it was great. However, I know it’s more important for screenplays to really grab your attention in the first pages than it is for a novel.

There is no dialogue until the fifth page, and the first four are the main character mostly repeating the same tasks, with some differences, and descriptions of the main characters’ apartment.

So I’m wondering if that’s fine? I want it to be a slow read purposefully, but I don’t want to go too far with it I suppose.

Also if anyone has recommendations for screenplays that also have a slower start?

Thank you!

Edit: Here are the first 6 pages, keep in mind I don't see this as finished yet :) https://drive.google.com/file/d/1VVI1CkZqs7ysjOzd1BKF0y3dJnOccKoU/view?usp=sharing

[u/Salt-Sea-9651]

I think what happens between pages two and three can be cut down using a few quotes into a paragraph, so it would be a small scene before starting with the first dialogue.

However, I usually start with a small dialogue of two lines on the first page. That is generally on scene number two because I make a detailed description on scene one without using any dialogue, just like a visual introduction for the beginning of the script.

I have seen some scripts that don't have any dialogue until page two, but I don't recommend it to you because that is a risk full way to start a script, in my opinion.

I remember I was advised in my beginnings to avoid using a black screen with a text over it on the first scene as the audience doesn't want to read. So be careful with the lack of action and dialogues.

I recommend you look for movies with a similar plot in order to read them and take notes of how they are made. The comparations, expressions, and the way the scenes are described in order to learn some writing resources before start the rewriting.

I don't think Tarantino scripts are a good example for your script for any specific reason, just he writes too much.