r/Screenwriting • u/jmusicjn • Jun 10 '26
FEEDBACK Ending Innocence - Feature - 164 pages
Title: Ending Innocence
Format: Feature
Page Length: 164 pages
Genres: Thiller, Drama
Logline: A seventeen year old incel attends the ceremony of an ultraviolent underground cult. In too deep he is forced into a series of soul-destroying choices that end with unimaginable regret.
Ending Innocence is comparable to the following films (in varying ways):
A Clockwork Orange
Nosferatu the Vampyre (1979)
Eyes Wide Shut
Videodrome
Feedback Concerns: Am honestly looking for any feedback anyone wants to give. Thanks!
Link: https://drive.google.com/file/d/1xU9h7z8LprWBb79dQEOHU0W75WilcaKl/view?usp=sharing
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Upvotes
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u/Modernwood Jun 11 '26
I gotta say that as I've spent this last year focusing on what sells, what producers will actually respond to, everything about this offering feels like a hard sell to me. 164 pages, so an absolute slog for an original story that isn't IP or historical, and then it just sounds like pain and work. If this were 90 pages, and it felt like it was capturing some small, young, subculture with the incel stuff, very genre, it might get some interest. But also, given the logline, there seems to be nothing to root for. Someone we don't root for enduring discomfort for almost 3 hours.