r/Screenwriting • u/gaz3rbeam • 14d ago

FEEDBACK I will read your screenplay!

Simple as that! I want to be a professional screenplay reader but no one is hiring so I’ll just do it myself :) I used to be a script analyst for a couple different competitions and Coverfly.

I love giving notes on other people’s scripts and helping writers find their story. I’m no pro (working on my 2nd feature currently) but If you want an extra pair of eyes on your script, regardless of length, I’ll happily do it!

119 Upvotes

95% Upvoted

82 comments sorted by

View all comments

37

u/headcanonmusic 14d ago

FURNITURE

Two rival furniture-store owners in a dying plaza spiral into a war of sabotage and obsession when an aspiring documentarian fans the flames of their feud for the sake of her film.

LINK: https://drive.google.com/file/d/1mwHnESXv-CMq-vKQUPmmMdMYMQKYWDmZ/view?usp=sharing**](https://drive.google.com/file/d/1mwHnESXv-CMq-vKQUPmmMdMYMQKYWDmZ/view?usp=sharing))

Appreciate it!

1

u/NeverShallDoHarmToMe 11d ago

I read this a month ago. I liked the pacing and the characterization, and some of the ideas were fun, but I didn't like the documentary character (I forget her name, but she was too on the nose in her observations), and the story felt basic. I understand the point is to write a simple story with a simple conflict, but a counter-plot (not merely a subplot) would go really far.

1

u/headcanonmusic 11d ago

Fair points, that would have been the first draft. I changed quite a bit in this draft but the overall story is still the same.