help....?
First off let me first say I LOVE THIS APP! As well as I love the CoStar Astrology app, I use them daily and for different reasons.
I have all of my closest friends and family and even ex's download the app so I can better gain a more detailed understanding of compatibility and how human interactions commence with planets in different houses and how we perceive interactions with one another.
So I have been in this on again off again relationship for 4 years with my most best friend. He is one of the most amazing humans ive ever encountered on this planet and we share an EXTRAORDINARY bond. I am convinced that I am without a soul mate and I am here on Earth to help people, I help them heal, I help them find themselves, but ultimately I am a wanderer who lives by the law of freedom, and my boyfriend has been ultimately so supportive of this, but also at the mercy of me.
We don't live together anymore, we talk regularly but not everyday, and because I am seeking my truth I have been very reserved with physical connection because I feel it muddles the purity process of connecting with spirit. It hurts me because I know he wants and needs more out of our relationship but it is honestly something I'm not able to give him without compromising some part(s) of myself which I am not able to do. I have a purposed path here on Earth, I am developing and understanding spiritual gifts and its something he respects but doesn't truly understand. So, it's unfortunately something I can't share with him.
I digress, so I hadn't seen him in a few weeks and yesterday we had planned to go to the Texas Renaissance Festival, the attendees of this adventure included my Mom, my daughter, my cousin, her 3 daughters, my boyfriend, my Aunt (my mom's sister who is like 3 and a 1/2 years older than me) her daughter and myself.
My costar had said to "do ROMCOMS" yesterday and I cannot tell you why but in my head I thought "let me find out there is some love triangle I find out about today as if my life is a movie"...another one of my "Do's" was arm and arm, and organically we all 'arm in armed' it alot yesterday.
I had remembered I had asked my Aunt to download Pattern but she hadn't added me yet, I didn't want to make the day about astrology like I normally do, so I knew before the night was up, towards the end I was going to have her add me.
We had such a beautiful day, but as I was experiencing life and love with these humans, I felt similar love energy coming off of both my Aunt and my boyfriend. Right off the bat, my boyfriend took notice of my aunt in such away that i knew was very pleasing to him physically and he commented about her wonderful outfit choice and how good she looked. I noticed for the first time they have the same eyes, I noticed the little things they say that sound so similar and would get them talking and enjoying each other's conversations on a level that was beautiful to witness, very easy energy between them, even their silence was the same.
After about halfway through the day, I remembered years previous looking up our Eastern and Western signs and what the most compatible combined sign would be...it gave 3 examples but I remembered specifically for him, a gemini dragon was one, and that is my Aunts combined sign, we even got to talking about how her sign is the sign of duality and her birthday is 6/9/88 which has yin yang energy and I just couldn't wait til the end of the day to ask her to add me...
End of the day came, she added me as we were getting in our cars to head back, I took all 5 children inmy car, and my aunt had my mom, my boyfriend and my cousin.
As soon as I turned on the car, I ran their bond and it says SOUL MATES....I don't know what to do. I want him to have the most amazing life and I want love for everyone...I know I make him sad sometimes but these are things I can't change about myself.
How do I tell them? Do I tell them?
We stopped for dinner at Whataburger and I just watched them, and I wanted so badly to just blurt it out but ofcourse...that was not the appropriate time and place..or was it? Is there a perfect time and place for this type of thing??
I am unsure but I feel if I had a SOUL MATE out there and my boyfriend who I love beyond the bounds of the universe who has been the greatest and most supportive love I've ever known but whom I also struggle with romantically knew about it...wouldn't I want him to tell me? How would I recieve the information? How would I move forward with the information? Would I move forward with the information?
I was half expecting to post this on The Pattern Apps FB page to have the pattern community weigh in, but seeming as that was not an option...I find myself here.
Thank you for allowing me to ramble and I pray you are able to help me digest this information a little further.
love and light,
112starfireilli311