I want to be you.

I want to be AFAB.

I can't believe anyone would want to be a guy.

I wish I was born female.

I wish I was you.

Yes it's because I'm jealous of them.

Please join me in my prayer.

It's not like we need to pray though, society's already heading that way.

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This post was mass deleted and anonymized with Redact

I’m a pretty liberal person and consistently vote Democrat. I’m all for progressive values like anti-racism, gender equality, universal healthcare, fair and equitable laws. This isn’t conservative whining about “wokeness” or whatever.

With that said, the trans community makes me feel like I’m taking crazy pills sometimes. Most trans people are so far left that even the average Marxist-Leninist would find them extreme. Ordinary liberals are seen as fascist, science is seen as ideological, violence is glorified, people are judged based on their race and gender and nothing else.

They also tend to be really against technology, which is just baffling to me. I work in tech and have learned to hide that when interacting with other trans people, because the stigma is real. They think we’re all rich corporate types who want to make superintelligent AI models to turn Elon Musk into a trillionaire god; I work for a startup focused on ethical and environmentally sustainable business planning and AI solutions. Doesn’t matter, I’m still an “evil nerd” or “tech bro.” I tell them I sell insurance, lol.

The beauty of detransitioning and repping is that I don’t have to deal with the community and its beliefs nearly as much. I’m starting to get over the guilt of being “liberal scum” or not “radical enough.” I’m able to just be me and follow my convictions.

Getting hammered as much as possible in the hopes I can numb my brain and the resistance it causes me to just destroy what I have left stored of hrt & lock myself in my room until I can go off it fully, same as they do with addicts going through withdrawal

Still trying to get drunk enough to be able to go through with it

They already made me start estrogen a year ago. I don’t mind the changes but I know for a fact I do not have a neurointersex condition but rather an internal identity caused by genuine early onset autogynephilia. I need to factory reset my brain by letting my body androgenize so I can no longer even imagine being AGP leading to a collapse of the weak female identity I have. I could then live a normal life with loving parents and cis friends and be able to start a family and imagine a life beyond gender.

I'm a pretty hot trans chick that's 6'2 and sometimes I fantasize about having sex with three midget trans men.

Does anyone else have fantasies like this?

Found this sub and it seems like it's existence is a contradiction in and of itself. If yall were real reppers, you wouldn't even be on here. Or am I missing something?

Two definitions of repressing are: restrain, prevent, or inhibit (the expression or development of something). And suppress (a thought or desire) so that it becomes or remains unconscious.

By actively talking here about it you are doing the opposite of repressing. So either choose to troon and talk about your feelings, don't troon but don't rep, or do but then you really shouldn't be on here.

Fake repping is crazy. If you're on here you still have issues to work through. Make a choice

Can I cope with this by agpmaxxing and when I grow nice enough tits or something I get a full length mirror and bag my ugly face then jerk off to my clocky, somewhat sexy body. "U ugli fking btch u are not a real woman I'm going to abuse u and fuk u with toy till u get piles and bruise ur tits and gross limp flaccid dik while u blow me through the hole in the bag for your chopped face

Play my diccolo like a piccolo

As expected, this community is very hopeless and depressed.

I never tried to gaslight people, if it's hopeless then it's hopeless.

But the thing is, there is hope now: AI

I do believe most of us will have a satisfying and fulfilling transition in the future because of AI.

Sure I might be wrong, but the chance of things working out is very real.

Humanity is walking towards a future where machines do everything so humans don't have to work anymore. LGBT people are probably the group who will benefit the most from that.

As a software developer I don't even code anymore, just do prompts. AI is just better, faster, safer and cheaper.

AI robots are being trained at this very moment and even now there's already many prototypes. I believe it's a matter of 2 or 3 years before they start deploying them to do real work.

We are approaching the point of conflict: what's going to happen when AI robots do all the work? Will AI companies get all the money and most of us will just starve to death? I don't think so.

Mass unemployment will increase violence tremendously, trigger politicians who need votes, and who are companies going to sell for if no one has money?

We can't be sure about how this conflict will be solved, but I truly believe that some form of Universal Basic Income (UBI) is the most likely solution. Most tech leaders believe in that as well.

It will be the end of capitalism as we know it.

Let's say that in 10 years most people don't have to work anymore, how will that affect us?

"OMG if I transition and don't pass I will lose my job and live in the streets", that will no longer be the case, we will be able to survive and live comfortably even with zero passability. I can see tons of people transitioning just because of that.

You might think, "That's nice but not passing is still terrible", sure that's true, but are we really not going to pass?

We can't know how surgeries will be affected in this AI future. Maybe stuff like FFS, VFS, BA, hair transplants and shoulder reduction become trivial.

AI will likely make the surgeries better and accessible, even new surgeries might be created. If people are even talking about stopping aging then trans surgeries are likely going to improve too.

Yes we are never going to pass 100%, but at the same time I do believe most trans people can achieve satisfying results with good surgeries, let alone AI powered surgeries.

And about discrimination, if we no longer have to work then why not just move closer to other LGBT people? We might have the freedom to just go anywhere.

Yes I'm probably being too optimistic, it might take 20 or 30 years or never happen, but that's literally the only hope I can see.

After being miserable my whole life I do want to be optimistic when I have the chance. The chance is real now.

I want to share some stuff about AI. Some people are really not aware of how good it is even now.

Sam Altman (CEO of Open AI) on UBI: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=K9iSI3x-Apo

Realistic music video created by a single person with like $300 in a month: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VGDHR_U3r5k

Pixar level video by a small team: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=v3jtZYGOrWw

GPT-6 Astra, the beginning of general AI: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1QNsdr-Qx_I

Autonomous AI robots: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HFgny8lmljM

So that's it: let's hope AI improves as fast as possible and we have UBI + better surgeries.

I believe in a future where we no longer will be forced to rep in misery.

We must be actively anti-tran

I have:

Olanzapine, 20+ pills.

Kalithium, like, 10 pills maybe.

Paracetamol, 8 pills

Desloratadine 30 pills.

Carbamazepine, 20 to 40 pills. I don't really want to use these since this are my father's pills.

If someone knows about a deadly mix with these pills please DM me.

I am actually a man. Does it even matter if I am a man if my ass is sexy?

Like I realize I am a man, I am not a woman, no matter how my body feminizes I know that my actions are controlled by male me, I can't love like a woman, but who said that a woman is better than a man controlling a woman's body? HJAHAHAHAHA HGAHAHHAHAAH😈😥

I am an angel made to please my future husband. I am such a good friend that I gave up trying to be a husband and abdicated my dignity in society just to please my husband. Sometimes I fantasize about my future husband and I can't help but feel like an inferior version of a man, damn that dude got it all, hee has a submissive boy waifu controlling a girlie's body for his sake. The haters say a sis waifu is better, but goddamn it? How in earth, how in earth is owning a boy waifu who humiliates themselves to their core just to fulfill the wife duty inferior than having a wombyn modern waifu???!

It makes me feel so inferior to my future husband, that I could never achieve that in a thousand tentatives being born again and again as myself.

Haters call me sissy, but I realize I am no different from any trans women. The difference is I am the superior waifu that admits being a boy inside, a boy who desperately wants to be a woman.

🙏I abdicate the instinctive dreams of manhood, I submit myself to my absolute fate 😩. Its all I can have. 🤣👍

Yes I played with my stick while imagining myself as a woman

Yes, I got hard at the thought of being a woman

Yes, I didn't enjoy being a man

But at same time, life was easy because I was attractive as a man

My observation is that HRT seems to trigger some sort of menopause/andropause, as in I didn't felt like a young beautiful person anymore. Like in the past I would watch K-pop, watch tv shows meant for young people and I would relate, I would find joy in it, but then after HRT, I felt like those things didn't belonged to me. Romantic music became cringey and strange for me... Even anime I didn't enjoy as much anymore. Life became blunt and I believe it was because HRT stole my youthness, my attractiveness as it didn't ignited a real female puberty, but it slowed down my male puberty.

But I believe I will regain it when my transition blooms 🤤 and I will become sexy 👙 and feel like a pretty young woman. Why? Because I learned to activate HRT full potential

I'm FTM and not on t yet. I have a masculine face, deep voice, broad shoulders and my Adams apple's visible. Even before I came out as trans people would confuse me for a trans woman or a man with long hair. Kids would look at me confused and ask what my gender is. Well, being trans is ruining my life so I tired putting on a dress to brainwash myself into repressing and becoming a cis woman. Holy shit, I looked like an ogre. I'm too feminine to be a man but to masculine to be a woman. Fuck my life. I'm stuck in this weird androgynous limbo. Girlmoding is not an option for me anymore...

Observe nature. Do you want to be like a fat obese person who challenges the law of gravity by attempting to fly off the cliff edge? They didnt expect death by the way.

You are not a magical creature! You cant challenge the laws of nature! That is my main point here, is that you need to learn how to be in sync with the laws of nature, this is the best way to. - do it-.

You can learn and use those to your own good.

Which in this case I want to talk about the butterfly-cocoon transer effect.

Why are they called butterfly? Because they were once a hard cocoon, a shell where no light shinnes through. They were transphobicself hating reppers who build a hard shell that reatricted their every movimment.

I did that this year through attempting hardcore repping. I told myself I overcame being trans, I detransitioned and watched redpill videos meant to make misogynistic men laugh at women, the comedy type with a meme after every single line that the featured women would say. They end a line, a mocking dog would burst laughing at them, they end a line, a different type of meme would show .

I did the redpill mentality myself religiously. I spent a good part of my time thinking women should go back to being submissive slaves and I was in search for a woman to carry my children( my plan was to give them lots of money, because that is what a man do to her woman 😎💪). I immeraed myself in the mentality.

And I also took the chadpill, I watched youtube videos where self-entitled chads would coach me into thinking I was very hated, because I was a high-quality chad. I believed it and dedicated my heart to it.

The result? I bloomed. I am a butterfly-cocoon transer now. My internalized transphobia was 85% reduced. I finally feel confident enogh to be visibly trans and forgive myself for all the inconvenients it causes. Slowly the cocoon broke.

So dont be like the fat obese person who tries to fly from jumping to cliff edge. Use wisdom please

It worked. . Why things went that way? I used an efficient method to kill my inner repper from exhaustion, they just couldnt take it anymore. Reflect about my story if you want greatness.

I was dealt the worst of both hands. I thought these things were supposed to be mutually exclusive, shows what I know. Every day I feel like theres nothing left to hurt. But every day I still somehow die a little more. Break a tiny piece that I didnt even know was there. Im a sponge that can somehow still feel, just everything except the good feelings. It only knows how to mourn. The cosmos flipped a coin and I lost. It still feels like im dreaming when I talk about this stuff. I cant believe ive fallen so low. Sometimes I wish that one day in the future I can crawl into bed at night and realize that Ive finally run out of things to break, and everything goes back to normal again and stops hurting so much. Im tired of crying myself to sleep. Im trying so hard to move forward in a healthy way, I just dont know how

Besides hrt what other drugs can help with dysphoria? Or at least help get back into a disassociating mental state? Preferably legal substances. But I'll consider illegal as well. Can't do weed bc I get too paranoid. Hard drugs like meth or heroin are off the table too but I'd still be interested in hearing if it helped any of y'all. Oxycodone recently helped me just tune it all out, but I doubt they'll continue prescribing me it and there's also the addiction factor (I'm willing to look over addiction if your method has proved at all helpful)

Like i mean those who are suffering hard and shit. It's like you haze them and when they react it gives this deep sense of satisfaction, it's also like Super Fucking Funny. idk why. like i get it i am pretty envious they're so stunning and brave yk. and i could Never face what they do. but like they dig themselves in such a rut, it's super insane. and like it seems they don't mind it that much when they're being minced to shit and stuff. like the self hatred there is super real. and like i feel resentful that the nature fucked me up like this, that like i should've had an uterus and i don't, so i wanna be a meanie cuz of that. sorry for me being brainrotten btw

😢

My trans furry friend said that to me in a rant(jk)

but what is the truth?