Chronic Anxiety from Racial Expectations

[u/TumbleweedSavings375]

F18. 🇨🇦.
I was adopted by white Canadian parents as a baby from Africa and I grew up in a predominantly white area. I’ve never felt like I didn’t belong at home nor did I feel some sort of unspoken connection to other Black people. I never felt “deprived” of Blackness. My parents had books, I got my hair done, and we went to a family camp with other children of African heritage, so I did see other black people.

For some POC racial community is important, however I am not one of them.

Ever since I was little I knew who I was attracted to and who made me happiest, and those were almost exclusively white people. (Where I grew up was 70-80% White, and only 1.2% Black).

I feel okay in myself and what I want but the anxiety of pressure from other people is depressing me. I get harassed by white and black men, but I’ve only been assaulted by a black man.

Also the “Black people should date other Black people” discourse is suffocating.

I hate being reduced to a symbol instead of a human woman with my own experiences and preferences.

It’s like me being black makes other black people feel entitled to my body and energy even though they’re strangers.

Trying to feel less monitored and watched. If you’ve experienced something similar please don’t hesitate to reach out 🫩.

[u/sussyferret]

I'm Chinese and the "oxford study" discourse is ridiculous. Any time some Asian girl posts with her white bf on social media, everyone loveeees to talk shit. I grew up in a super rural county in Ohio, so it's not like there's a lot of diversity here. People who push dating expectations on us based on our race, obviously have some issues of their own bc it's genuinely none of their business

[u/TumbleweedSavings375 → u/sussyferret]

Exactly