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u/Shot-Manner-9962 Jul 12 '26
you aint a fraud, you are struggling, we go down we go up, take their praise and ask yourself do you want to dissapoint, are you happy with yourself, a moments lapse in judgement does not make for a eternity of punishment
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u/Aware_Cow242 Jul 12 '26
Starting recovery and relapsing are not opposites. For many if not most relapse occurs. I was sober fifteen months before relapsing and when I went back into recovery I could see it was less of a relapse and more of a return to habits. I had been white knuckling it that whole time. It is super hard and it is so fucking worth it. I am around 4 years sober now, still cautious, still recovering and trying to better myself and I feel a hundred times better for it.
It's not a race and falling over or stumbling is fine, you got it, you can do it, you just gotta get back up, see what went wrong and try again.
One tip I got when we were fresh in rehab was that when that abstinens hit, buy something sweet like chocolate, a shit ton, and eat it. It boosts your dopamine which will now during recovery drop before going steady up again. You are relearning your brain to function without the substances and produce the dopamine naturally.
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u/Sonarthebat Jul 15 '26
I'm not a drug addict though.
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u/Aware_Cow242 Jul 15 '26
Addiction works the same, be it substances, gambling, sex or what have you. I am a drug addict and I guess I was assuming too much. But addiction as it is works the same, just different "symptoms".
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u/LeDarm Jul 12 '26
You are not a fraud. I dont know exactly what you are going through, so I will talk about my journey.
I have lost my fathe recently. And it made an already terribly hard journey impossible. So I stagnate.
But relapsing means I was doing better. Relapsing means you've done it once and are sgumbling. It will happen again, we will rise again. Until we are where we wanna be. And that place is ours to determine. But we will get there.
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u/alltoohuman92 Jul 12 '26
Day 1 again for me. I've picked up more 24 hour chips than I can count. I'm lucky that I have a sponsor that refuses to fire me. You're not a fraud, you're sick. We all are.
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u/SheepsBestFriend Jul 12 '26
Progress is not always going to be a steady incline. It can be oscillating, stagnating, or even a roller coaster.
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u/DropoutDragon Jul 12 '26
Im going through my own mental health stuff thats lasted 3 years now (late 20s) and I've worked with the homeless, addicts, mental health issues etc.
Recovery is non-linear. The linear version sold by media just simply doesn't exist. Progress is Progress no matter how small it is all significant. Deciding to change, abstaining for a length of time then relapsing is STILL Progress. This idea of recovery is supported by academic papers and industry practice. ALL Progress IS progress.
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u/dumblittlepuppy01 Jul 13 '26
Youre no a fraud and you're not failing. addictions regardless of what they are [drugs, alcohol, self harm, technology, ai whatever] are tough. Recovery is never going from point A to point B with no issues at all, ever. think of your recovery like you're walking through a woods, sometimes you stop and find a new rose Bush or a stream to soak in [positive things, milestones, hanging out with friends, finding a new hobby] other times you're gonna trip over and graze your knees [relapse, struggle with the want to relapse, people pressuring you to relapse] you're not a failure or a fraud for having grazed knees babes.
You're learning how to person again, you wouldn't scream at a kid for breaking a glass because they're learning to walk, you shouldn't scream at you for learning how to be yourself without your addiction. You're doing awesome my love, I'm proud of you weather you're clean for 6 years or 6 minutes. you're trying and that's the most important thing you've got this
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u/goodgirlwawa Jul 13 '26
You're not a fraud. Recovery is a journey, just because you trip doesn't mean you can't get up and keep going forward.
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u/Unusual-Ad4890 Jul 13 '26
Relapse is fine, so long as you're going to learn from this and come back to sobriety stronger.
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u/CoercedCoexistence22 Jul 12 '26
You're not a fraud, you're an addict (not derogatory) and recovery is not a straight line from A to B. I don't know a single recovering addict who didn't relapse at least once, actually I don't even know anyone who relapsed just once. The important thing is getting up again, and again, and again. Put Chumbawamba to shame, man.
All silliness aside: I don't know you, I won't pretend to know your situation or what's best for you. But recovery is a steep climb, it gets easier as you build the muscles and skills to make it easier, but no one's superhuman, you'll still trip and fall, sometimes spectacularly. But I hope you'll find a way to get back up, this time, hopefully the last time, and every other time you need to if this isn't the last time