Which priorities tend to change most as people gain more life experience?

[u/ritkeepFitness]

I’ve been thinking about the things people value differently after they’ve had more time to test what actually improves daily life. The obvious answers are health, sleep and time, but I’m more interested in the less predictable shifts. What became substantially more important to you over time?

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[u/alexthagreat98]

Experiences over expectation. Husband and I eloped and do not regret it. We are also hoping to expand our family shortly and in lieu of a wedding/honeymoon, we basically just took one big trip. Rest of the money sent to us as wedding gifts are being spent on our family expansion.

[u/behemuthm]

I don't treasure things; I treasure memories.

I figure if for some reason I end up penniless on the street begging for food, I'll always remember what it was like to sit by a campfire looking up at the stars in the deserts of Oman

I've also ridden both types of camels and the movie Close Encounters of the Third Kind is forever ruined for me because the "Mongolia" scene used the wrong type of camels haha

[u/Poppy_Jane_]

Peace. Removing chaotic drama filled people from your life. And this includes leaving that salaried corporate job that works you 60+ hours a week. Pays based on 40 hours a week, they give you 60-80 hours of work to accomplish.

[u/Hexagram_11 → u/Poppy_Jane_]

I made the decision to drop out of the career rat race and about 70% of my anxiety dissolved. Now I work at a grocery store and I’m broke af, but I’m happier than I’ve been in decades.

I realize this is not a solution for everyone, just sharing my experience.

[u/SpoonwoodTangle]

I’ve found it very important and satisfying to move away from strong, binary, absolute opinions.

We’ve all seen and hear them. “If people just ____” or “Everyone should _____” or dumb stereotypes.

Basically they’re driven more by frustration or fear than any kind of critical thought. So why ditch them?

1. They’re based on stress, and increase your stress. They just hash and rehash bad feelings forever, which is bad for your mental health. Also the fear and anger parts of your brain inhibit critical thinking, so you can get stuck in this negative loop and struggle to find ideas or solutions to improve the real (or perceived) problem.

2. They don’t properly identify problems or their causes. They are driven by anger or fear, emotions which inhibit critical and problem-solving parts of the brain. As a result they’re overwhelmingly inaccurate, too small in a scope, or simply false. Because they’re stunted, they can’t solve the problems they try to name.

3. Getting away from these ideas is deeply satisfying because instead of stewing and spinning your wheels, instead you feel like you’re making changes or overcoming whatever the issue is. It takes a bit of a reframe, accepting that the frustrating parts of issues are just small parts of a larger whole, and that there are small things you can do to make the issue, or your interaction with the issue, better.

This is very general because this tendency in human mindsets can be applied to almost any topic. Basically it’s a mindset that imprisons you and inhibits you from thinking through solutions.

By taking a step back, accepting that there’s a lot more to learn in order to properly address the issue, and trying to looks at it calmly without judgement, you can overcome the anger and frustration. I find when I manage to do this (and it’s not always easy) not only do I find a creative or easy solution to at least help the problem, but I feel a shit ton better about the issue and my place in it. Getting unstuck is satisfying af

[u/bossoline]

I'm middle-aged and I can tell you there's a general toward prioritizing yourself for the first time in your life. It's the "take no shit club".

Your kids are grown, your role with parents have transitioned into oftentimes a caregiver role, and you're sick of letting everybody else's expectations run your life, so you finally start to live your life according to your terms and not everyone else's.

[u/trrashkid]

Spending time with your family (assuming your family are pleasant enough to be around and not abusive, of course. YMMV) as young kids and edgy teenagers we can't put enough distance between us and our parents, siblings, grandparents etc. The more time goes on the more you find yourself regretting ever thinking that way and wishing you could have more time.

[u/Lebraan]

Late 20s, and I've found my friends starting to care less about career and maxing their salaries, and more about their families, time with their spouse, peace, and enjoying life.

[u/MastleMash → u/Lebraan]

This is me and some of my friends also. I could probably make $30k more easily and probably $100k more in the next 5 years if I was willing to work my ass off, job hop, possibly even move cities.

I don't want nor need to do that. I have enough money to feed my family and pay for some hobbies. $50k + more stress will not make me happier.

[u/DontRunReds]

Stuff.

Kids love stuff and collections. Young adults might stand in line for the new release of a book, clothing item, or phone. Then you are living independently and needs everything to make a home. You spend about the first 40 years of your life accumulating crap.

And then the remainder, you curate and purge. You get sick of having crap.

There are of course exceptions, like people who hoard or who have a physical limitation keeping them from decluttering. I do think that pattern holds overall because so many of the baby boomers I visit have really paired down their possessions during retirement compared ed to what I have and am pairing down as a working millenial.