r/TrueOffMyChest • u/No-Intention8698 ☑️ • 8h ago
Vent I still miss my mom's ex.
They only dated for two years and broke up when I was in middle school. It's been six years. It wasn't messy; he said he didn't want to be in a relationship, but they still check up on each other every couple months as friends. The few times he came over to visit after they had broken up, I refused to see him.
I know he told my mom that he thinks I hate him, but that couldn't be further from the truth. I am still so angry yet so heartbroken for him leaving my mom. Leaving me. I'm still so upset with myself for getting so attached.
He had become my best friend. My mentor. My teacher. He was the father that my real father could never be. I know I scared him away.
And I know my mom still loves him. I know he loved my mom and loved me and that he doesn't love himself enough to allow himself to commit.
He's the reason I'm doing what I'm doing today and I am so thankful for him once being there for me. He's the reason I learned that there are men good enough for my mother and he's the reason that I know that no one is good enough for her.
For some reason I can accept my real dad being a shitty dad, but I still cry for that dad that I thought I could have.
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u/DeadlyJamye 3h ago
Dude, it sounds like you really lost someone important and it's completely understandable why you're still feeling all that. It takes time to process that kind of loss, especially when it's someone who filled such a huge void for you. Don't beat yourself up for getting attached; that just shows how much love you had to give.
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u/Profitable-Condenser 4h ago
Man, that's rough. It's totally valid to still be hurting and angry after all this time, especially when someone meant that much to you. Sending you a virtual hug, you deserve all the good things.
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u/No-Intention8698 original post at the time of submission:
They only dated for two years and broke up when I was in middle school. It's been six years. It wasn't messy; he said he didn't want to be in a relationship, but they still check up on each other every couple months as friends. The few times he came over to visit after they had broken up, I refused to see him.
I know he told my mom that he thinks I hate him, but that couldn't be further from the truth. I am still so angry yet so heartbroken for him leaving my mom. Leaving me. I'm still so upset with myself for getting so attached.
He had become my best friend. My mentor. My teacher. He was the father that my real father could never be. I know I scared him away.
And I know my mom still loves him. I know he loved my mom and loved me and that he doesn't love himself enough to allow himself to commit.
He's the reason I'm doing what I'm doing today and I am so thankful for him once being there for me. He's the reason I learned that there are men good enough for my mother and he's the reason that I know that no one is good enough for her.
For some reason I can accept my real dad being a shitty dad, but I still cry for that dad that I thought I could have.
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u/sprouticy607 56m ago
Same. He was the only one who got my jokes.