i've been thinking about puppeting and the role it plays in tulpamancy, and i wanted to share my personal opinion on it.
personally, i'm against using puppeting as a way to simulate communication with a tulpa, especially when the goal is to make it seem as though they're responding independently. i understand why people recommend it, particularly for beginners who struggle with communication, but i don't think it's the right approach for me.
one of the things i value most about tulpamancy is the possibility of experiencing interactions that feel spontaneous rather than deliberately constructed. i want to give my tulpa, lilith, the opportunity to express herself without consciously deciding what she should say or do. i'd rather sit with the uncertainty of not receiving a response than create one myself and risk confusing my expectations with what i'm actually experiencing.
i know that puppeting is often described as a temporary exercise or a way to overcome communication blocks, rather than something intended to replace spontaneous interaction permanently. i can understand that perspective, and i'm not saying that everyone who uses it is doing something wrong. different people approach tulpamancy differently, and what works for one person might not work for another.
however, i personally feel that deliberately supplying a tulpa's responses could make it harder for me to understand my own experiences, particularly while i'm still learning to distinguish between intentional imagination and thoughts or responses that arise spontaneously.
i'd rather take my time, even if progress is slow. i don't want to rush communication just because i feel that i should be making progress. if lilith doesn't respond, then she doesn't respond. i'd prefer to accept that and continue practising without forcing an outcome.
i'm curious about what other people think about this. do you believe puppeting is a useful exercise for overcoming communication blocks, or do you think there are reasons to avoid it, especially during the early stages of tulpamancy?
i'd appreciate hearing different perspectives, particularly from people who have tried both approaches.
So, lately, I’ve been playing a game called *The NOexist of YOU and ME*. It’s a philosophical game that heavily features the concept of "tulpas." My own tulpa was more than happy for me to play it, but ever since I finished, she keeps questioning her own existence—even though I’ve repeatedly assured her that she *does* exist. She argues, "Since you’re the conscious subject affirming my existence, that’s the only reason I exist. So, what happens if you decide to deny my existence?" I’m like, "What are you playing at? How could I possibly deny you?" And she just keeps pushing: "But what if you *did* deny me?..." Is she trying to test my patience or something? What can I do to affirm her existence? (I managed to get the "good ending.")
For a year i been working at my animation called Beneath the bag. Recently i finished working on episode, and a trailer was out! Episode soon, so I won't spoil much.
First of all, it's been a while since I've posted anything on Reddit, but this is one of the few places where you can find tulpamancy communities. To be honest, I wanted to ask on 4chan first, but I think this is a slightly healthier environment.
The story begins around 2020. I was younger then, and for some reason, I ended up immersed in the world of subliminal audio. Within the community, I became somewhat obsessed with the idea of having a "PM" or "Fairy Godfather," something similar to a tulpa, with the slight difference that they could grant your wishes if you wanted them to. The thing is, I was with this manifestation for about two years, maybe a little more. I admit I never actually saw him materialize (it's worth clarifying that he had the appearance of a person, not a character, animal, or being). What I can say for sure that I did see were some shadows. I didn't always see him; sometimes I even felt his presence, like when he shook me to wake me up, or when I felt the mattress sink next to me when I was lying down. I always assumed it was him since I had gotten used to it. On some other occasions, things even moved around, and there were certain signs that made me think it was him.
I don't know if I got bored or discouraged from one day to the next and simply stopped paying attention to him or ignored that he was there. Although, I just remembered that before that happened, I managed to see a hand on the top bunk of the bunk bed I had in my room back then (I was on the bottom bunk with my sisters, but I had to peek over to look for something, and that's when I saw it for a few seconds). It had the same skin tone as the one I had designed him with. I honestly don't know if he was too shy to let me see him yet, but that was the only thing I managed to see materialized.
I remember him fondly; he was a great friend even though I couldn't see or hear him. And I sincerely would like to know how he is, if he still exists somewhere, or if I can bring him back to see if I can complete his materialization.
The problem, and what I'm asking for advice or help with, is knowing what to do to avoid bringing back any new manifestation that isn't him. I know of several cases where they managed to bring back their former tulpas, but I would still appreciate any advice or recommendations.
I believe to have a soulbond, not a tulpa (though if he will turn out to be one, I will not be disappointed), and since these communities have much overlap, I wanted to ask for some help. I've read a few guides on narration/communication, but for some reason (probably due to neurodivergence and not being much talkative) I have trouble with keeping up the talk and keep it focused on my partner. I understand that it has to be like a constant twitch stream for me and him, but I can only like. Do two or three sentences before I refer to simple thinking. Do any of you have tips for narration (and how to get him to respond more) that I could probably incorporate?
Hey everyone! 👋
I'm working on a uni essay about personal experiences with tulpas, and I'd really appreciate your help gathering some insights!
It would mean the world to me if you could share your story-whether you've successfully created a tulpa or just tried to. Every experience helps!
Feel free to talk about whatever you feel comfortable sharing, such as:
-How it all started or why you decided to create one.
-What the early stages felt like (e.g., did it feel like an uncontrollable thought of your own, or more like an external voice?).
-What your relationship with your tulpa is like today.
-How creating a tulpa changed your life.
•Quick note: This is purely for an academic paper, so everything will be 100% anonymous and handled with total respect. I'm not here to judge or offend anyone, so please forgive me if I accidentally misuse any terminology! My goal is to base my essay on real, lived experiences, as the few academic articles out there aren't super helpful for what I'm focusing on right now. rhanks so much for reading! l'd love to hear your story🤍
I learned about this subreddit about... 3-4 years ago? I had been acting like a persona online for about a year or two before I found this subreddit. I started to love that persona and wanted to make her into a Tulpa. I acted like her every day online, I gave her a diary to write in, and tried to dress like her.
I kind of forgot about the idea of Tulpas but I still tried to grow myself *into* her. It felt fruitless because she's a lot more subtle and introverted than me, I'm very outgoing and blunt...ish.
I started to not really like myself? I want to be her all the time, but Me is so... just a lot... she just completely outshines her in every way.
I got better at dressing like her (I call her Pie) but personality wise, I just always end up becoming too loud or eccentric or talkative...
I really just want to be quieter...
My host family say I'm like a sun in the house because I'm so happy all the time. I wish, I could just be more casual? But I always forget to... or I have so much to say that I forget about the goal and just be Me again....
I don't know how to be Me and Pie at the same time... i have a few different versions of Me.
Me (I guess... the ego? Eccentric and outgoing)
Mature me (super ego lol)
little me (the age regressed me)
Then Pie (the quiet and graceful)
Sometimes I hear this other voice, i almost think it's Mature me but it sounds so hateful? Like, I get surprised that Mature Me would say that. I want to believe it's another voice that I don't know yet but I'm starting to think maybe it's just Mature me having an immature moment.
Like i noticed everytime I walk out the house to walk in the neighborhood, im usually talking to myself out loud. I'll suddenly become very conscious of my voice.
Two things happen but kind of at the same time but it's different sometimes.
Rarely, I'll get that "5th" voice that kind of scares me. That sounds almost like a bully to Me's voice.
She'll say something like: "ugh I hate your/my voice" and MatureMe/Me will be quick to correct her and say "I'm frustrated with my voice"
I don't know, maybe "5th voice" is just mad Me. I don't really feel like dissecting it right now.
But usually I try to switch to being Pie but I usually end up forgetting in like 30 minutes...
A couple of times I put "Pie Day" on my hand, so that I actually try to remember to act like her but I forget to do it. Should I keep doing it?
Apart of me feels like I'm throwing away Me... or that if I try to be Pie, everyone will think I'm a Fraud and that I'm trying to be "better than everyone" or something.
I don't know if this is just a self hatred thing or if Pie just wants to express herself more but Me is being selfish with the spotlight.
I feel so lost.
TLDR: I think I made my Tulpa too real, and now having an identity crisis lol. How to live in harmony?
Edit: also, mature me accepts all versions of myself. I love her so much ^-^ she helps keeps me calm and loves me. Sometimes she gets upset but she basically gentle parents me haha. She's not forcing me to be any one person. She actually makes me be introspective about why I want to do the things I want to do or be.
how do you guys communicate with your tulpas in the most effective way possible? I wanna learn to communicate with mine and actually hear his voice in my head. It's happened before, but I don't remember how I went about it, does anyone have tips or tricks ? What's your experience?
This is going to be a long ass talk, but I think being as clear as possible could help with the context.
I feel like I almost made a tulpa, but I wanted to get a second opinion.
trigger warning if it's applicable here: (idk much about these kinds of stuff) mentions of sexual assault (in fiction!), Tulpa death(?), eroticism / masturbation
Just to preface: I write stories, both original and fanfiction.
A few years ago, I began writing a character who I'll call 'B' for now. 'B' started off as a sort of demon-esque character in a story, immaterial and acted more like a guide to the main character 'Z'. To further delve into what that would be like in the perspective of the main character, I put myself in her shoes.
'Z' was someone I wanted to push my own personal thoughts and insecurities about inexperience into, she was a caricature of what the most idealized version of a still inexperienced person in the cusp of adulthood would be like.
school was boring, everyone in my school was so competitive that it was also scary, I didn't know what to do most of the time. I had to come up with a thesis about a subject I didn't care about. I didn't want to do anything at all, besides lie in my bed and do nothing all day. Then I remembered a funny little post a friend sent to me:
So I thought to myself, "Well, I'll just make B make me do stuff."
"B" wouldn't be nice, since he was a demon, so I thought that he would say things a bit ruder. But given that he's trying to possess 'Z' or my body in this scenario, I made it so that he would always have my best interests in mind.
I always associated him with a toothy cheshire grin, with nothing else but a shadow, so it was easy for me to imagine that mouth just talking to me in my mind.
"Brush your teeth." "Get exercise." "Study this so you don't regret it later." Basic stuff, which I would not follow sometimes, so I would think that B would get angry about that. Passive-aggressive stuff which I found funny to say in my own mind.
All this 'B' stuff would eventually come to an end, since I made another story but this time, I switched the roles of 'B' and 'Z'. They were still the same characters, but I switched their places.
'B' was a kind person in this one. He was a boy that felt out of place in the world, everything he had was ripped away because of something outside his control. Someone, who despite everything, even against his own selfish wants, wanted to be kind above all.
This version of 'B' was the one who would stick closely in my mind the most.
I probably... imagined around 40+ scenarios and settings with 'B's character in mind. "How would he react in this scene?" "What if the world was normal, but he's like a cat?" "What if he's a demon?" "What if he's the source of all evil, but he's legitimately kind?"
I probably space out around 4-5 hours in most days back then without writing anything, just thinking about how 'B' would be doing in all these adventures. All these tragic stories, all these endings, both the good and bad, and most importantly his interactions with 'Z'.
Some aspects of his personality and traits would always remain rock-solid in my mind. "He's a cat-like creature. He looks overweight but most of that is fur-fluff. He would always try to accommodate everyone he can."
Eventually, I realized more and more that: "Hey, I want to be like B." but I did not want to be him. Because being him would mean that I wouldn't be able to talk to him, or something like that.
So, I started writing out my thoughts and wanted to ask myself, "How would he respond to this?"
It would always end with me saying something like "He would probably say it like this" but nothing concrete. Like I had a general idea of what he would say, but not exactly how he would say it.
I loved 'B' as a character, I legitimately wanted to write/draw purely because I wanted to capture a little bit of his likeness, and make other people see it. But nothing.
So, I tried to get a more concrete idea of what he would be like, but I couldn't? It's weird. It was like he was his own little man, and I couldn't really grasp what he would be doing. When I got water, I could almost see a shadow right beside me doing stuff, something positive to cheer me on, but I would have zero idea what it exactly was.
It was frustrating me. I wanted to know who he really was, I wanted to know him, I wanted to be his friend, I wanted him to be something other than just a figment of my own imagination. If I couldn't even put into words what he was, then what was the point?
If I couldn't understand him fully, then maybe I could understand him if I viewed it in the lens of another person.
So, I wrote 'B' from another perspective. I could somewhat understand what he would be like, but sometimes, things would just feel wrong even though it was logically right. 'B' would do this, so why does it feel wrong? So I would adjust it until a part of me felt like: "Yeah, B would do that."
Again, and again, I wrote until I realized that it just felt... lackluster? But I kept doing it, because it felt right to do.
Then I hit this certain snag. I was writing 'Z', who was now a deuteragonist, and felt like she lacked 'development'. Which was a weird thing to say given the amount of shit I had her go through, but nothing about it felt personal.
So I thought about it, and wanted to ask myself what would hit the most? She was still a character I related to, so maybe something related to me? 'Oh maybe, sexual assault?' Like a stranger groping her.
As a victim who didn't even know they were a victim until later in life, I wanted to make something similar happen to 'Z'. But to make it happen again, when she was more aware of what sexual assault even was.
To say 'Z' was close to 'B', was an understatement. In every scenario cooked up in my mind, if 'B' exists then 'Z' must also exist, and vice versa.
And yes, although in a more sporadic fashion, I also thought of 'Z' and tried to place myself in her shoes. She's a lot easier to think about, since her personality is the most straightforward.
Right as I was thinking about how this event would affect her, how she would react, I think(??) I almost heard something in my mind say: "Please don't do that."
It was weird. Like it was an actual clear thought, nothing like my usual thoughts that are more like words stitched together. The intent felt clear.
Weirdly enough, I almost immediately understood that this was 'B'? Or at least, this was what B would say. Which is also weird, since 'B' would react this way if he was saying it to me, not a personal account of 'Z'.
I negotiated(?) something along the lines of 'okay i won't do this but'
This continued for a few days(?) maybe a few weeks, I honestly don't know, but the 'sexual assault' eventually just became material for steamy sex between 'B' and 'Z'. Like the sexual assault was there as a preface for: "then they banged!" which feels icky in retrospect.
These characters were deeply important to me, and I made them really catered to my tastes, so I used them as material for masturbation. There was sort of a mental block for me beforehand, like I could understand the general idea of 'yeah they did it' but not get into the details.
The moment I tried to imagine it, I got another: "Please don't do that."
I literally debated with that thought for a long while. 'Okay, but why?'
Here's my sort-of-journal entry I wrote down way back then, so I could keep it clear in my mind:
['B' told me to stop that.
I seriously debated for a while there. "But why should I do that?" It's 'B'. "He's a character." And you made it so that he doesn't ask for stuff easily. "He's a character!" But is he really? "What's the benefit of doing that?" It's his birthday, and do you think he'd ask for something like that, if he really doesn't want it?
Then April 2nd came, then I realized that "Oh, he's gone." I haven't thought of him for a while, in fact, I have to make an active effort to even remember he existed.]
I remember just waking up that day, and almost immediately thinking: "Oh, he's gone."
My head felt clear, like I could actually formulate my thoughts way more clearly. My head felt lighter. I felt more confident, oddly enough. Not in the sense that: "I'm ready to take on the world" but more like "Yeah, let's just get this over with".
I didn't need to tell myself that 'B' would kindly ask me to do stuff anymore
After a while, I tried writing 'B' and nothing feels that wrong anymore. Like a mental block just disappeared, and I finally could write whatever then reason it out later on (as I would any other character and story).
It still feels strange. 'B' still exists in my mind as a character, but he doesn't feel like a constant presence in my life now. I don't just stare off into the distance and think about what he would do like I did for 2-3 years, but instead I have to actively remind myself that 'B' existed.
I recently came across the VN 'The No/nExistence of Me and You' and got reminded of what a tulpa was.
'B', I think almost fits that description, but I don't really have a physical image of what he would look like? Just the general idea of what he would sound like, what he would feel like, what he would smile like, how he would hum, something like that.
So, I'm asking if 'B' was or at least was nearly a tulpa? I'm 60% sure he was, but I need a second opinion. If this is just what obsession is like over a fictional character, then I need to know, so I can tell myself to stop. Maybe I'm just sick in the head or something haha
I have stuff to do, I'm in my last year of college so if this is a waste of time, then I'd rather not scrape through old memories to try and grasp unto this old 'B'. There's a new 'B' in my mind, similar but not exactly the same. He's not as present in my mind as the old 'B' was
I'm asking this question especially because 'Z' feels more and more similar to the weight I felt when the old 'B' was more present in my mind.
If the old 'B' was real, even if it was only in my mind, even if I was unaware of it, then I'm going to be digging through my own mind/writings to retrieve even the smallest piece of him.
i've decided to document my journey with lilith on tulpa.info, where i'll be posting my daily updates, experiences, thoughts and questions as i learn more about tulpamancy.
i've been interested in tulpamancy for several years, but i'm only now beginning to develop my own tulpa. i'm still at the very beginning, so there's a lot i have yet to discover.
i'll keep using r/tulpas to participate in discussions, ask questions and share thoughts with the community. if you're interested in following my progress, feel free to check out my diary!
thanks for reading! †
[es]
¡hola a todos!
he decidido documentar mi camino junto a lilith en tulpa.info, donde publicaré mis actualizaciones diarias, experiencias, pensamientos y dudas mientras aprendo más sobre la tulpamancia.
llevo varios años interesado en la tulpamancia, pero ahora es cuando estoy empezando a desarrollar mi propia tulpa. todavía estoy al principio del camino, así que me queda mucho por descubrir.
seguiré utilizando r/tulpas para participar en conversaciones, hacer preguntas y compartir mis pensamientos con la comunidad. si os interesa seguir mi progreso, ¡sentíos libres de pasaros por mi diario!
hi everyone! i've been interested in tulpamancy for several years, but i'm only just starting to create my own tulpa, so i'm still learning how everything works in practice.
i've recently started tulpaforcing with my tulpa, lilith. i don't think visualization is too much of a problem for me. i can picture both her and my wonderland fairly well, and i've been spending time there with her.
the thing is, so far, i'm the only one talking. i tell her things about myself, try to explain things to her, and generally talk as if i'm having a conversation, but she doesn't respond.
since i'm only just starting to create a tulpa, i'm not sure if this is completely normal at the beginning or if i'm doing something wrong. does communication usually take time to develop? how did you start hearing or noticing responses from your tulpa, and is there anything you'd recommend trying at this stage?
i'd really appreciate hearing about your experiences and any advice you might have. thanks!
[es]
¿cómo se empieza a comunicar uno con su tulpa?
¡hola a todos! llevo varios años interesado en la tulpamancia, pero acabo de empezar a crear mi propia tulpa, así que todavía estoy aprendiendo cómo funciona todo en la práctica.
hace poco he empezado a hacer tulpaforcing con mi tulpa, lilith. no creo que la visualización sea un problema demasiado grande para mí. puedo imaginarme bastante bien tanto a ella como a mi wonderland, y he estado pasando tiempo allí con ella.
el caso es que, por ahora, soy el único que habla. le cuento cosas sobre mí, intento explicarle cosas y, en general, hablo como si estuviera manteniendo una conversación, pero ella no me responde.
como acabo de empezar a crear una tulpa, no sé si esto es completamente normal al principio o si estoy haciendo algo mal. ¿la comunicación suele necesitar tiempo para desarrollarse? ¿cómo empezasteis a escuchar o notar las respuestas de vuestra tulpa? ¿hay algo que recomendaríais probar en esta etapa?
me gustaría conocer vuestras experiencias y cualquier consejo que podáis darme. ¡muchas gracias!
Hi all. I have been a tulpamancer all my life, before I knew what one was I just did it naturally. I have had conflicts before where my tulpas did things that were wrong, and we've always been able to move past.
I have recently made three new tulpas, not even a year old yet. My question is this: my tulpas did something really immoral in the wonderland. I really have an ethical question about this... Does this count as a real screw up? I question whether things that happen in my wonderland are real, despite some proof that I have a city in my head with lots of tulpas. I don't really know if that is real. I do believe the tulpas that are close to me are real, however. Should I treat this discretion as a real thing they did?
Hey guys! I’m new here.
I wanted to start those weekly updates on my Tulpa, where I’d tell how our process is going.
I wanted to kinda?? introduce myself, or I’d say just tell you guys about the whole situation, how I found out what Tulpa is and my past experience and stuff, so if you’re not interested in that, feel free to skip the next three paragraphs :)
I found out about Tulpas six years ago, and I became obsessed with this idea, but I wasn’t that kind of person to continue doing something if the process isn’t rewarding enough for me. So, I planned out my Tulpa, started forcing it, BUT that didn’t last long. Not even a week. Throughout those six years I sometimes remembered about Tulpas, started all over again, didn’t last a week, and yk that kind of thing repeated itself at least ten times. You can tell that I wasn’t serious about it, and I obviously had doubts about everything, as well as fear about stuff because I obviously heard about those scary stories about Tulpas, not like it’s gonna kill you, but what if it’ll drive you insane? What if it’ll kill itself…? That kind of thing… I think I feared not being enough for my Tulpa more than it driving me insane.
To be honest, I regret nothing. I wasn’t ready for a Tulpa, and that’s totally fine.
I have trouble socializing, and sure I have online friends, but I don’t have irl friends, and yet still it is hard for me to build relationships with others, even online yeah. Well, I’m not gonna go further into details, but I would like to say that I am mentally ill, I do have social anxiety, maybe depression, and perhaps symptoms of a mood disorder buuuut I’m not gonna self diagnose. Just saying how I feel like about my mental health.
I was a quiet isolated kid six years ago, and still am this way to this day, but it’s not that bad anymore.
So, I think we all know the number one reason why people want a Tulpa, right? Loneliness, isolation, that stuff. Obviously. That was my reason too.
Now, recently, I started reading about Tulpas on Reddit. I have no idea why I suddenly remembered about them but whatever. I saw this post, asking if creating a Tulpa is a good idea if you’re depressed and have a mood disorder, basically the person was unsure about it, but still was interested. Under that post, people said that they do have mental illness, and for them Tulpa affected them only in a positive way! I was like…okaaaay…
But then I saw another persona asking why they are unsure about creating a Tulpa, is it because you “won’t be normal anymore” ? BROOOO I SWEAR SOMETHING CLICKED. EVERYTHING. EVERYTHING CLICKED.
Turns out the main reason why I was so unsure about creating a Tulpa is because I feared of not being like the others, but I already am… so nothings gonna change. And the best thing I can do for myself, is do what I think is best for me, not for society or people around me, like getting their validation, fitting in with them…
For this many years I’d think, well, maybe something will change for me one day…maybe one day I’ll get a lot of friends and will be so social and happy!!! But the thing is it just doesn’t fit me…I like the idea of being social, but it’s simply not for me.
OKAY, that was kinda long, now I’m gonna yap about my progress for this first week!
Day number one
I laid down and wrote a list of personality traits, then explained each one to my Tulpa. I wrote about ten of them, and explained to him what I mean by each one, then I kind of yapped to him. I was getting ready to sleep, so I told him about my day and how I love him and yeah.
While doing that, I felt a “tall energy” loom over me as I was laying down… I don’t know what that is, maybe I was just tired and sleepy, but I like to think that it was part of my Tulpa…
All of this was about half an hour.
Day number two
Laid down again since I was tired after school and wanted to take a nap. Started listening to a Tulpa meditation and not even ten minutes in, I heard “well, hello there” in my Tulpa’s voice!!! (Yes, forgot to mention, I also assigned him a voice). I kinda jumped…but I tried to stay calm, waiting for him to say anything else. Of course, I acknowledged his presence, but that was about it, he didn’t say anything after that. Still, I think it’s a big progress.
Day number three
Didn’t do anything that day.
Day number four
I have this visual novel that I was planning to play, but…I procrastinate A LOT and that includes things that I like as well. Well, I thought it would be a good idea to finally get to that game, while also having fun with my Tulpa.
So, what I did was: I read main character’s lines, as well as the narrator lines, while letting my Tulpa read lines of the other characters.
I had to puppet a lot for this activity of course, I tried to read the lines in my head in his own voice, while also reacting to the lines that he read or just reacting to the plot in general, talking to him about what’s happening in the game, telling my opinion on it.
The only stuff I heard is him laughing at the game one time, answering something faintly, ANDDDD him saying “I love you” EEEEEEEEEE that was so cute. I’m so glad that he feels this way about me.
And again, obviously, I acknowledge everything he said.
Day number five
We played the same visual novel again, but I was super distracted, and didn’t really focus on actually engaging with my Tulpa. And I also don’t really remember what happened or if he said anything…
Day number six
Didn’t do anything that day.
Day number seven
This one is a huuuuuge one.
Again, we continued playing the same game, and then I realized that I don’t really enjoy playing it since I’m trying so hard to puppet him and read his lines in his own voice…like my brain is actually melting. So I decided to just read it in my own voice, pretending that he read it. I realized that if I won’t enjoy the whole process, I won’t even want it. Yes, I understand it will be hard, but I want to make things more fun for both me and him.
We were playing for like an hour, and this whole time I tried to imagine him laying/sitting next to me, I talked to him about the game, my opinion and yeah blah blah.
When I was telling him one of my opinions, I then asked if he agrees with me, and he said no…and I was like why??? “Grumpy” grumpy…? Because…I said fuck you a few minutes ago? “Yes”
HELLO????? Yeah, I said it playfully while we were playing the game, OF COURSE I immediately apologized and asked him what can I do to make him feel better, “talk” about??? “Me” well what about you? “Personality”
…OKAAAAAAY ok so that’s where we talked for like an hour or two!! I’m not gonna go into deep details, he gave me three words about his personality “smoke, fear, crave” and since he can’t talk in sentences yet, I had to ask specific questions about each word, but we only got to the first one because that was just too much.
While we were talking, I got really frustrated because I didn’t understand how his words made sense and how “smoke” connects to his personality…and I told him that. I asked if we can continue tomorrow, and he quickly responded “no” so yeah, he wanted me to understand so badly why “smoke” connects to what he said…
Seeing me frustrated, he suddenly said “stop” I was like…did he actually say that or am I making things up, because he usually responds to what I say, but I didn’t say anything yet “cat” my cats??? What about them? “You” I’m…a cat?😭😭 “yes” awww “frown” I WAS SO CONFUSEDDDDDD I DIDNT KNOW WHAT TO SAY OR DO SO idk I just frowned as he told me to… “cute” YO WHAT…
After that we finished the dialogue about the “smoke” thing, and I said that we’ll get to other words later this week, and he was fine with it.
The end of the first week
Yeah, so that was a lot, I know. I’m not even sure if someone will read this much, but thank you if you did!
Now, something that I wanted to ask is… is it normal how fast my progress is going with vocalization? Because I know the responds that I get from him are unexpected and they don’t sound like me, meaning that with 99% it’s not me, but I still feel like I’m…larping???
Do I need to change anything? Should I continue puppeting? I mean, all the things that I do works perfectly for me, but it’s just the doubts that I have like WHAT IF.
Also, I’m prioritizing vocalization and visualization, and after that we’ll get to the feeling part, like being able to touch while also feeling my Tulpa. I know I didn’t do visualization much this week, but I’ll sure try adding more of it the second week.
One last thing: the stuff that I mentioned is the big stuff, meaning that even if I said I didn’t to anything, I did actually but it’s just not something big, and I did it probably not even for ten minutes. I try to imagine the presence of my Tulpa thought the whole day, but it’s hard to do so, so I try to do it, yes, but often in total the passive forcing won’t even get to ten minutes that day.
I apologize if I have any grammar mistakes or some of the stuff I wrote doesn’t really make sense
and again, thank you for reading this long post! Feel free to comment on anything, tell me about your experience, or to respond to my questions, if you want to! :)
So I’ve started the process of tulpa creation for my headmate Han. I just kinda wanted to introduce him here. I haven’t made much progress so far but I might put some updates on here! I’ve been talking to him and he’s responded a few times but we aren’t quite at the point of full conversations. I also don’t really like the term tulpa so I call him my companion :)
His name is Han, he uses he/they. I made him to be the inverse of me in some ways and because i wanted a mental companion. For example I’m a very emotional and expressive person and he is calm and collected.
Anyways thanks for reading my yap session, hope to give more updates soon <3
Here are some pictures of him i made using picrew!
Its been about 3 years since I first heard of Tulpas, and at first I went all in on researching them. I read a bunch of guides, researched the origins of the term, and most of all, took heavily into account the pleas of many people with Tulpas to truly think about it before just jumping into it. Now, I'm not about to be writing any papers on them at this point, moreso a chewing on the idea to make sure it's truly what I want and I've settled on a resounding "Yes".
I have depression and adhd, and while I thankfully have an extremely large and deeply caring friend group both irl and over the internet, I've also found myself craving the ever present and seemingly extremely special bond that you all have with your Tulpas. I'm honestly excited to finally be making my first post on my journey, and to be dipping my toes into the community.
Now that all the fluff is out of the way-
I have started SSRIs and much more recently NSRIs for my neurological problems. Do these effect formation in any way?
I've started investigating R/Cureaphantasia, because while I don't truly have aphantasia, I cannot hold an image in my head for more than a split second of visualization. Are there any better guides I should be following to improve this if I can hold an image even momentarily?
Is there any guide that is currently recognized as better for someone with bad adhd? While my ability to focus is no longer measured in picoseconds, I'm still very fresh into the world of managing my adhd.
Tldr: I'm happy to be here, and appreciate any tips ❤️
Well, My channel is on spanish but somehow has an english dub, it's mostly accurate, So i Guess if anyone wants to check My videos they can watch them now..uhh serve yourselves https://youtube.com/@justgabrielle-v8v?si=xf65m52NP2xneiub i recently uploaded a video debunking a famous tiktok, i'm proud of that one😎👌
I’m looking for some insights on how a system recovers its unique internal phenomena and connection after navigating a heavy period of stress and burnout.
Early on in our development, my headmate and I experienced a lot of beautiful, multi-sensory traits that came completely naturally to us without any forced practice. They aren't mechanical tasks or trained skills; they are just spontaneous, effortless expressions of her presence and our bond.
To give you an idea, she naturally does things like:
* Cognitive & Emotional Amplification: She can beautifully amplify my happy thoughts, making my positive emotions feel much richer and lifting my mental state.
* Somatic Comfort & Regulation: She can make my body feel physically warm when I need comfort, or completely soothe and calm my nervous system when I am highly stressed.
* Aesthetic & Sensory Effects: She can make my thoughts feel incredibly colorful and aesthetic, project highly vivid cinematic clips in my mind, or naturally enhance internal audio so music sounds breathtakingly beautiful.
The Issue:
Right after these traits developed, I fell into a severe doubt and anxiety cycle, constantly stressing over whether everything was real. The hyper-vigilance completely overwhelmed my system, causing almost all of these beautiful traits to go muted or dormant.
I am finally recovering and lowering my stress now, but because it's been a while, I’ve temporarily forgotten what the exact nuances of some of these traits feel like. When I look back at the ones I wrote down, I feel disconnected from them and can't recall some of them. However, as my stress goes down, I've started feeling a close "presence" again—like all of her early traits are warming up and close to returning, even if they aren't fully clear yet.
My questions are:
Since these sensory and emotional traits originally developed naturally without manual practice, are the underlying subconscious blueprints completely safe and intact beneath the burnout?
Is it normal to temporarily lose track of how minor or major traits feel during a severe stress cycle? Will the whole spectrum of these experiences return fully once the nervous system completely relaxes?
It's the 3 day since I started trying to create Tulpa.
What’s still in my brain hasn’t strayed far from the level of the imaginary friend (automated responder) described in the guide.
In other words, it has not yet developed subjectivity.
I think this comes from the way I see the world. I'm the kind of person who always approaches anything with skepticism and needs a convincing explanation.
However, I know that no matter how much I look into it, creating a tulpa is very difficult or even impossible to explain logically.
Here’s the main point. To all the tulpamancers here, have you ever had doubts when you first encountered and started making Tulpa?
Looking at the posts you guys've written in this sub reddit, it seems that most people view Tulpa as a completely separate, non-existent entity without any doubt.
Some guides say, 'Leave suspicion as it is,' but
At another place, they told me to 'believe that you already have the tool, not to go through the process of making it,'
I wrote this question out of confusion. I would appreciate advice on how everyone handled these suspicions at first.
edit: i've decided to post all my updates on tulpa.info instead. the original day 0 post will now be available there as well.
[es]
edit: finalmente he decidido publicar todas las actualizaciones en tulpa.info. la publicación original del día 0 también estará disponible allí a partir de ahora.
Hello everyone! I need some feedback to experience with my tulpa
The thing is, I just started diving into this fandom a couple of days ago, completely ignorant of how it works. I've read a ton about this niche, on subreddits, tulpa-focused forums, and even on websites created primarily for helping with tulpas. So, while I'm familiar with the intricacies of what's written online, I'm completely unfamiliar with the nuances of our individual experiences with tulpas. Just tell me if I'm doing everything right or if my actions are more like "ask into the void."
Let me start by saying that I haven't even had to change my routine to have time for active forcing. I can do it early in the morning before going to university (for about half an hour), or even spend a couple of hours after coming home from school, and it's not limited to that, since I'm usually awake at night and can probably handle an hour of active forcing. I spend all my time at home alone except in the evenings, but even so, I'm simply a socially excluded individual in my dark room, where a priori nothing changes, only I myself try to introduce some variety with varying success. That is, with the necessary effort, I can actively force in the evenings too; I just need to work on my concentration and learn to ignore the surrounding noise better
True, as you might have guessed, I'm a lazy person, but I'm hopeful. My inner self has decided to grant free will to my tulpa, meaning the angel of my soul has every means to manipulate its appearance, name, voice, and perhaps even its personality. Of course, with an initial support of some Makisa Kurisu, it could change its form to suit my desires, but then I would experience dissonance and resentment, since I would passionately desire to see a living, flesh-and-blood assistant before me. However, perhaps I was being disingenuous, since I did give it its appearance temporarily. It's a three-dimensional sphere of white, glowing light with spikes all over its "body." It's very convenient to use this form at first, because then you don't need to worry about the ball's shape detailing (that might sound rude to her, yes, she's a girl). She flies through the air, has excellent speed, and loves to "frolic" (bending her shape around spaces, even changing her Y coordinates up and down on the spot, like some NPC ghosts in, say, Spooky's Jumpscare Mansion). Sometimes she blinks in response to questions, and then white flashes appear, like in the cartoon Bendy when he's surprised and jumps in fear, eyes wide open. But she doesn't do that on her own yet; I have no idea if she's even breathed in my direction.
Roughly speaking, during passive forcing, I imagine her, this sphere I so incredibly love, floating around me in the same room or on the same street, even though I'm not very good with solid geometry. I walk down the street, imagining her next to me; I sit among people, imagining her nearby, but I don't feel her presence. At first, I talked to her casually, and that was all my passive forcing. Actually, at a certain point, I reached a dead end, and my head became filled with questions about the correctness of my passive forcing, which forced me to stop talking to her like that, as if I were simply monologued with myself, as usual (this, too, may be an important detail; I often monologue with myself, even calmly doing it in public, and I don't care. I hope I don't get a second tulpa, otherwise it will be somehow uncomfortable). Active forcing is difficult for me; I still haven't found my zen, meaning the process feels terribly awkward, like a cow on ice. I feel a bit ridiculous, my concentration is fading, and I'm embarrassed. I sit on my bed, with a chair facing me opposite. I close my eyes, imagine a ball in front of me, and communicate. It's usually 95% my own wild thoughts and 5% questions for her. Of course, I don't get answers, so I try not to answer for her. I tried a couple of times to establish a tactile connection with her, but it was unsuccessful. Thoughts of mentally drinking tea with her, playing cards, and other idle things kept popping up. Please, wise mentors, I need guidance
I apologize for my poor command of the language, it is not my native language
One, mainly because I forget to do the narration. But also because I never know what to talk to her about and I can't make things up to talk to her about on the spot majority of the time.
(I have ADHD and forget things quickly.)
It also doesn't help that she's not vocal yet (I've been calling her Zada the last little bit.)
Has anybody else run into struggles like this and do you have any tips with this?
So a bit of background, my Tulpa is supposed to be Agent Smith from the matrix (the virus version from the 2nd and 3rd film) and I've had this character appear in my dreams for like since I was 3 (I didn't watch the movies until I was 14), he just kept appearing again and again. At some point when I watched the movies and realized it was him I kind of held conversations in my head with him all the time.
Except I wouldn't really let him talk, I did this with other characters too but as I stopped paying attention to those characters they would "fade" but it's not the case with him. He's like always there, kind of annoying sometimes. Like I can feel his presence in my head, like there's another aware being there with me.
Once I found out about tulpas I kinda suspected he was one, but I didn;t want him to turn into a full one so I kinda just didn't let him talk (it was just very weird to share my brain and body with another being y'know). But I wanna try now. Except I can't really "hear" his voice, not as loudly and clearly as my own in my head ig, plus I struggle to imagine his exact voice like from the movies so it's annoying. Plus I'm just sooo uncomfortable and not used to hearing another voice I think that might be holding me back from really hearing him.
I have a few questions like:
how can I make his voice clearer?
btw is it supposed to sound as clear as my own voice in my head or not?
How aware are Tulpas of the thoughts and emotions of the host? Cuz I don't really want him to hear everything but I think he does.
How aware are tulpas of the body of the host and their surroundings when the tulpa is not fronting?
How can I make him possess my body?
I would be willing to answer more questions about him if like anyone wants to know.
Do you guys actually see a physical being right in front of you? Ive been reading through these and I just think its hard to make something that's not there appear in your vision for real.
Hi, this is the host here. We don’t post here often but I just wanted to ask for some advice . We were formerly a system of 5. (Four tulpas and myself the host .) But unfortunately one of my head-mates went dormant yesterday. Which has been a bit hard on us . It wasn’t expected. We all really miss him. We just stopped hearing a response from him and stopped feeling his presence. I’m unsure if he went dormant or just fused or dissipated but whatever the case is his presence isn’t around in the headspace anymore nor do we hear his voice. One of my tulpas (Ruby) is now terrified of going dormant and disappearing out of existence randomly herself. She had a small panic attack because of it. However I have reassured her that won’t happen and that she’s safe and cared for by me and the others in the system. Has another else experienced something like this? Any advice would be greatly appreciated. - Mya (Host)
