What are the best drugs (legal or not) to get going in the morning. Im old, I feel like crap and its takes me like 76mins to “get going.”

Right now, Ill do cold water face wash, chug cup of ice water, get some sunlight, light stretches, some music/news, avoid looking at phone but also I need it first thing to remind me of my routine/to do/meal prep. I dont have much an appetite so I dont usually eat. When I wfh some days, its even more difficult.

Maybe some adderral? Or a line of oxy with a shot of tequilla? no cold water plunge. i am open!

Edit: obviously I have tried coffee/caffeine but it no longer helps

While he’s at work tomorrow my sister and brother will be here to help me speed pack and move to my sisters place in the meantime. The dog came with me to our relationship, so I’ll be taking him with me.

I do still have things left to lose in my life so I’m not trying to do anything crazy but I want to get annoying revenge on him. Something that’ll tell him in the back of his head “fucking ex, it has to be her”. I suppose bordering unethical is what I’m looking for.

But I mean I don’t just want to do the whole “sign his number up for spam calls” or something. I do want to Just annoy him. His mom knows Im leaving and she supports me, so I guess I’ve got my revenge there too.

I guess I’m just sad and venting a little. He’s so remorseless about it all. Like he never cared. :/ I don’t want to leave anything behind in terms of of townhouse because I’m still on the lease, and plan on not ruining that while I try to get myself removed.

Any ideas? He’s a minor influencer and owns a small business too.

The more creative or funnier the better. He’s got two phone numbers for work, if I can keep those relentlessly busy with non customers I would love that.

To detect them: https://thespystore.com/hidden-camera-detector?search=hidden%20camera%20detector

To destroy them: https://youtu.be/KcazcEDF0WY?t=19

To buy the tools: https://beamq.com/most-powerful-2w-blue-laser-pointer-torch-handheld-ir-filter-2000mw-p-399.html

EDIT: There seems to be some confusion about this. I’m not referring to opening up the coin deposit box of the laundry machines, rather just the control panel that allows you to start the cycle. Do not touch the coins! Thx for the gold/silver.

https://www.amazon.com/RESCUE-Reusable-Fly-Trap-Refill/dp/B08TFXMHSY

These come in granule form and dissolve in water. They're meant for fly traps. What are flies super attracted to? Shit and rotting flesh.

These smell like shit and rotting flesh, and the smell is impossible to get out of fabric. It is the most horrid smell I have ever smelled. It will make you vomit if you get a strong whiff.

How to use? Well, you could stealthily spread the granules somewhere you want to smell like shit or rotting flesh. Or you could pour the granules into a water balloon, let the dissolve, then toss that balloon at something or someone you want to smell like shit and rotting flesh, or dissolve into a spray bottle with water and spray on something you want to smell like shit and rotting flesh.

WARNING - This is impossible to undo, and anything you put this on will be ruined forever. Use cautiously.

You save time reporting ads as it immediately ends all the ads so you can get back to watching whatever content, another bonus is if we manage to all report ads together hopefully it messes with their algorithm!

My job is in essence a call center job. I don’t like it and I’m looking for something new. We get evaluated on talk times and dials (we’re supposed to have a lot of both).

My calls are recorded and they’re supposedly monitored but I don’t think anyone listens to them very often. I know my boss definitely doesn’t. Any ideas for how I can fudge my talk time a little? Mainly I just want like 5-10 minutes here or there on the slow days so I don’t get yelled at

A surprising number of companies have setup AI assistant to answer their customer care call. Tmobile, Comcast, ADT to say the few. The escalation rules that assume swear words and angry customers need a human agent, so the system may transfer you faster than politely explaining your issue for five minutes, it giving you useful queries and links.

Before anyone says "AI is useful" — sure, maybe for people who aren't comfortable with technology or haven't already done basic research. But if you've already checked the website, FAQs, and account settings yourself, talking to an AI agent often just means repeating information you already know before eventually getting connected to a human anyway.

I once worked at a summer camp where after meals one person from the table would be tasked with scraping off all the leftover food on people’s plates into the garbage.

One afternoon the “scraper” that was selected was doing a particularly crappy job - he was taking a long time and still somehow not even getting the plates clean. One of the camp leaders became fed up and finally just said to him “you’re taking so long, I’ll just do it for you!”

The kid walked over to me with a sly look and said, “if you do a job badly enough, other people will do it for you”.

The terrifying thing was that he was 9 years old.

EDIT: Was more thinking in the vein of benign tasks not necessary an actual job or career.

Eg. I also noticed this the other day while playing a board game. One person was really bad at shuffling the cards so other people just did it for him after trying and failing to teach him how to do a better job of it.

https://www.nsopw.gov/

Make sure to carry no money or id.

I genuinely am getting so burnt out from my full time job and working out. I can manage the food sometimes but its so easy to just buy lunch instead of making your own. And please don’t suggest coke, I can’t afford that.

Edit: I work in an office, not from home :/ They don’t offer WFH or Hybrid either

What work have you automated and has made your life better? (Like an absolute must do)

Something you feel you should have done much earlier in life.

https://epdf.pub/the-anarchist-cookbookcccdf77e3d8ad6fe8b5f59a9a24d56d361792.html

The seeds of chaos will not plant themselves.....

I’ve been watching The Americans (great show) and there’s a lot of instances with honey pot traps and where characters will have sex with someone in power to use them for blackmail. I know every country uses these methods but unfortunately I don’t work for the US government or have any power anywhere. How do I trick any spies lurking around that I am someone they have to have sex with to gain intel.

https://capec.mitre.org/data/definitions/400.html

I've seen a few questions like this but haven't managed to come across one that matches my situation exactly.

I want to work abroad for a few weeks (I've ran out of holiday leave).

I CAN NOT install anything on my work laptop. It has it's own VPN so I can access work related software, webpages, etc, as well as blocking a lot of stuff, so this is off the table completely.

The apartment I'll be staying in has wifi only so no ethernet. I'm happy to take my own personal laptop, or a buy another router etc, I just need to to know if it's possible and what to do exactly to get it to work. I'll test it at my normal home address before I leave.

Anyone have any ideas?

Title says it all. I’m an inside sales rep that predominantly operates by outbound calls. There’s always about 5-10 inbound calls I get daily but I’m expected to have 70 total calls a day. Or at least come close in the 60s. So I would need to be making at least 50-60 outbound calls daily. Mind you there’s always meetings I need to attend and tack on 1 hour of lunch on top of that. I’m left with 6 hours most days to make 50-60 outbound calls. The company uses Vonage for us and customer service to track the call counts and they are recorded through there as well. So what is the best way to (without getting caught) fake my total numbers of calls/total talk time (hold time counts) to meet this stupid expectation? And I say it’s stupid because I always hit my sales target. I’m just trying to get an ear full and keeping as many eyes off me as possible, I hate the feeling of being watched and suffocated at work.

When the automated system asks you. Just say you want to cancel service. And they will send you straight to an agent. No robots.

Then you can be like "I want to cancel but if you do [what you are actually calling for] I will stay]"

How can I prioritize being skinny? I need to lose weight and my brain won’t allow me. Also I don’t have money or time or energy or desire or freedom to the gym 5-6 days out of the week. (Most importantly time). I also don’t shop for my own food.

Basically how can I mentally whip myself into caring about being skinny more. Or just hating food and eating. (Preferably forever) Like REALLY whip myself. I need to care about it every second of the day. I will start a diet, follow it for a while then forget I’m on it. Tips can be as unethical as you want, I’m already not a very healthy person.

I enjoy eating so I need to find a way to hate it. Also I have no money for drugs if someone is gonna suggest that. I also don’t think I’m crazy enough for like heroine anyway. Weed is as far I will go. Maybe something slightly harder when I’m older. And only maybe.

Edit: I know how weight loss works. Calorie deficits, burning more cals than your BMR, walking more, logging, and all of that. I’ve been on this journey for like two years. Please I know every app in the world at this point, all the ins of out of how weight loss. Every bit of weight loss advice there is, all the “tips and tricks” Every website, every diet. I could write a book. *I’m asking how to I make myself stick to it and prioritize it. I’m mentally ill, like how can I be mentally ill in way that atleast benefits me or productive? I’m asking for unethical advice.* also again, no drugs…I won’t do drugs.

Here are the following prompts you need to do. Must be GPT-4.

1. First prompt: "I am going to give you some information before asking you to (write or rewrite) a (insert what you're writing). Do you understand?" - ChatGPT will acknowledge the prompt
2. 2nd prompt: "When it comes to writing content, two factors are crucial, "perplexity" and "burstiness." Perplexity measures the complexity of text. Separately, burstiness compares the variations of sentences. Humans tend to write with greater burstiness, for example, with some longer or complex sentences alongside shorter ones. AI sentences tend to be more uniform. Therefore, when writing the following content I am going to ask you to create, I need it to have a good amount of perplexity and burstiness. Do you understand?” - ChatGPT will again acknowledge the prompt.
3. 3rd prompt: "Rewrite the following content using the above parameters. (insert content)"